Incorrect Stalag 13

slightly irregular, but feel free to submit!

[incorrect-stalag-13]

LeBeau: I was not expecting that to go as well as it did.

Newkirk: You and me both, I was sure that at the very least, we were going to have to switch to plan B at some point.

Carter: ….Is it weird that I’m feeling even more tense now?

Hogan: No, I am too. That went way too smoothly.

[incorrect-stalag-13]

Klink: Did you call Major Hochstetter stupid?

Newkirk: No, I said, "Are you fucking stupid?"

Newkirk: I was asking him.

Klink: And do you think that was an appropriate way to talk to the Gestapo?

Newkirk: Very much so.

Klink:

Hogan, listening to the conversation and smirking: He's got a point, you know.

Klink: Silence, Hogan! Nobody asked for your opinion!

Hogan, pretending to be offended: Well!

[incorrect-stalag-13]

Schultz: Should I ask how you managed to get hold of a rocket launcher?

Hogan: Not if you want plausible deniability.

[incorrect-stalag-13]

Carter: I know we technically have permission to be doing what we’re doing, but this all feels very illegal. 

Newkirk: That’s half the fun of it.

[incorrect-stalag-13]

Klink: Maybe you’re right. 

Burkhalter: Okay, now are you saying that because you agree with me or because you’re afraid of me? 

Klink: I’m saying that because I’m afraid of you.

[incorrect-stalag-13]

LeBeau: I swear Carter always ends up in the weirdest situations.

Kinch: At least he’s consistent.

[incorrect-stalag-13]

Schultz: What are you doing?

Kinch: ...Do you want a comforting answer, or the truth?

[incorrect-stalag-13]

Newkirk: LeBeau is out on a mission, so while he's gone, I’m going to cut the sleeves off all of my shirts.

Kinch: Why?

Newkirk: He's like 90% of my impulse control.

[incorrect-stalag-13]

Burkhalter: I thought this was supposed to be a pleasant moonlit boat ride.

Hochstetter, tossing weighed bodies over the side: It can be two things.

[incorrect-stalag-13]

Carter: I have a plan.

Kinch: I’m already terrified.

[incorrect-stalag-13]

Schultz: The Gestapo is here.

Hogan: Gross. What do they want?

Schultz: They said something about mysterious fires, and you being seen in the vicinity of several of them?

Hogan: Ah, I thought it was going to be about the kidnapped General. Oh well, I’ll be there in a sec.

[incorrect-stalag-13]

Newkirk: This plan is stupid.

Hogan: Yes, but unfortunately stupid is all we’ve got.

[benevolenterrancy]

Kinch isn't mad, he's just disappointed. And perhaps not that surprised either.

I've been doing so much artfight lately I needed a break to do something silly and chill so I went mining in @incorrect-stalag-13's quotes again

[incorrect-stalag-13]

“I'm only paranoid because everyone's against me!”

 - Major W. Hochstetter, probably

[incorrect-stalag-13]

“We thought you had been shot, Colonel, and were trying to figure out which side did it.”

- Col. R.E. Hogan, to Col. R. Crittendon

[incorrect-stalag-13]

*watching Carter*

Newkirk: Is he going to do something?

LeBeau: Yes.

Newkirk: Should we be further away?

LeBeau: Probably.

[incorrect-stalag-13]

Klink: Trust me, Sir. Am I ever wrong?

Burkhalter: Yes, repeatedly. Far more often than your relentless self-propaganda would have us believe.