Time For Danger, Time For Ass

Yet another incorrect quotes blog, this time themed around the Milo Murphy's Law characters that are from the Bureau of Time Travel. OCs are included from time to time.

[incorrect-time-bureau]

Block: You were stabbed, do you remember anything?

Cavendish: Only the ambulance ride to the hospital…

Savannah: What? I drove you!

Cavendish: But I remember a siren?

Block: That was Dakota screaming.

Dakota: I’m sorry! I got nervous!

[incorrect-time-bureau]

Cavendish: What time is it?

Dakota: Dunno. Pass me that trombone and I'll find out.

Cavendish: [hands him trombone]

Dakota: [blows trombone loudly]

Block: WHO'S THAT PLAYING THE TROMBONE AT 2AM?!

[incorrect-time-bureau]

Milo: [narrating] And that's when they became horribly lost.

Dakota: Are you lost?

Cavendish: No.

Milo: [narrating still] He lied.

Cavendish: Stop it.

Orton: [giggles]

[incorrect-time-bureau]

Dakota: I don't know why we aren't getting any trick-or-treaters.

Cavendish: Maybe it's because YOU ATE ALL THE CANDY!

[incorrect-time-bureau]

Dakota: How bad is it?

Cavendish: Well, fortunately, the knife missed your femoral artery.

Dakota: That’s good.

Bob: No, sweetie, you had a knife inside of you. That’s the opposite of good.

Dakota: Call me “sweetie” one more time and there will be a knife inside of you.

[incorrect-time-bureau]

Block: So, how’d you convince all of them to betray me? What’d you offer them?

Leopold: I asked them if they wanted to embarrass you, and they instantly said yes.

[incorrect-time-bureau]

Cavendish: This tea is nothing more than hot leaf juice!

Dakota: Cavendish, that’s what ALL tea is.

Cavendish: How could my closest friend say something so horrible?!

[incorrect-time-bureau]

Savannah: I got five pieces of candy!

Dakota: I got a chocolate bar!

Cavendish: I got a quarter!

Brick: I got a rock...

[incorrect-time-bureau]

Cavendish: Oh, there's an empty place in my bones that calls out for something unknown. The fame and praise come year after year does nothing for these empty tears.

Dakota: ...Cav... I know how you feel...

[incorrect-time-bureau]

Block: Alright, does everyone have a weapon?

Cavendish: Savannah doesn’t have one.

Savannah: I /am/ my weapon, you fools.

[incorrect-time-bureau]

Cavendish: You kidnapped Orton Mahlson?! That’s illegal!

Dakota: What’s more illegal, Cavendish: briefly inconveniencing Orton Mahlson, or destroying the future?

Cavendish: Kidnapping Orton Mahlson, Dakota!

[incorrect-time-bureau]

Circles: [You can't stay angry forever, Daniel.]

Block: WANNA BET?!

[incorrect-time-bureau]

Dakota: Is everything okay?

Cavendish: If by okay, you mean that my life is a meaningless, black cauldron of swirling failure, then yes, everything is groovy.

Dakota: That's not at all what I meant by 'okay.'

[incorrect-time-bureau]

Dakota: Please. Picking locks is my specialty.

Dakota: [throws brick through window]

Dakota: Okay, let’s go!

Cavendish:

[incorrect-time-bureau]

Cavendish: Dakota, we need to think. How do we usually get out of these messes?

Dakota: We don’t. We just make a bigger one that cancels the first one out.

[incorrect-time-bureau]

Block: Since I’m gonna be out for a while, I’ve left you all a complementary bowl of advice.

Block, picking one paper out of the bowl: For instance, “Dakota and Cavendish, stop doing that” just applies to everything.

[incorrect-time-bureau]

Cavendish: All I ever wanted was to be your friend and you treat me like a big joke! You think I don't notice? Why don't you like me?!

Block: Cavendish-

Cavendish: No, tell me.

Block: Because... I'm jealous...