incorrect twilight

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Emmett: Am I in trouble? Rosalie: Take a guess. Emmett: No? Rosalie: Take another guess.

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Edward: How do Bella and Emmett usually get out of these messes?

Rosalie: They don't. They just make a bigger mess that cancels out the first mess.

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Edward: So, what time does the judgemental express arrive?

Esme: Rosalie and Jasper get home at noon.

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Bella: Is it okay if I swear?

Charlie: Yes, Bella, I will always allow you to swear.

Bella: F...

Charlie: Yes, go on.

Bella: I'm nervous.

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Edward: I think Bella is in trouble.

Rosalie: Alright. Struggling to give a fuck, if i’m honest.

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Teacher: Renesmee said a swear word in class.

Bella: I’ll talk to her about it.

Bella, to Renesmee: What the fuck, dude.

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Rosalie: Don’t change the subject.

Bella: What’s the subject?

Rosalie: Me.

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Rosalie: *holding bread to the sides of Edward's face*

Rosalie: What are you?

Edward: An idiot sandwich.

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Jessica: I think Mike likes you!

Bella: And I like him. To tease. To torment. To make him squirm!

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incorrectcullens‌:

What!? We hit 1k! That’s amazing! Thank you all so much for following! 

159 away from 3k and im still wondering why any of you like me enough to follow

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Emmett: Hey, do you think I could fit fifteen marshmallows into my mouth?

Rosalie: You’re a hazard to society.

Alice: And a coward. Do twenty.

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Bella: I overslept

Edward: It’s 4:30 in the afternoon

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Aro: We have your child.

Rosalie: I don’t have a child..?

Aro: Then who just asked us for warm milk and made us cut the crusts off their sandwich?

Rosalie: Oh god, you have Emmett.

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Bella: Two years ago today, I married my best friend.

Bella: Edward is still angry about that, but me and Alice were drunk and thought it was funny.

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[knocking on the door]

Rosalie: You wanna get that?

Edward: And interact with people? No, thanks.

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Bella: I slept for 12 hours but I might still be tired to let’s go for 12 more just in case.

Edward: My Love, that’s a coma.

Bella: Sounds festive.

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Edward: Everything’s going to be fine. It’s just a crush.

Bella: Hey, Edward!

Edward: I love you.