Incorrect Hawaii 5-0 Quotes

Not-so-correct quotes from the h50 crew. Feel free to submit! Blog created 12/13/15.

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Steve: I'm not used to people sticking around when things go bad.

Danny: Welcome home.

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Danny: Since you won’t be able to contact me for two weeks, I’ve left a complementary bowl of advice.

Danny: For instance, “Steve, stop doing that”. Just applies to everything.

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Lou: Uh oh.

Danny: What?

Tani: Somebody’s in love.

Danny: Yeah right. I just think Steve is cool, okay. It’s not like I lay awake at night thinking about him.

Danny: [laying awake at night] Uh oh.

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I would rather bleed out than sit here and talk about my feelings.

Steve McGarrett, probably

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[in Afghanistan]

Steve: I didn’t think you’d come for me.

Danny: Well, you’re a dummy.

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You're bossy... and short.

Steve to Danny, season 1

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[season 1]

Steve: Seriously, all you do is bitch.

Danny: I happen to bitch the perfect amount for someone in my situation.

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Why don’t you try speaking in words instead of your damn dirty lies.

Danny to Doris

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Danny: WE’RE GOING TO DIE.

Steve: Think positive!

Danny: WE’RE GOING TO DIE QUICKLY.

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Danny: It was a gift from my mom.

Steve: Your mom gives pretty bad gifts. Although, on the other hand all my mom ever gave me was abandonment issues, so.

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Steve: Sometimes when we disagree you’re so passionate I feel like I’m arguing with the sun.

Danny: What!? That is totally crazy!! I AM SUPER CHILL ALL THE TIME!!

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Steve, leaning on Danny's doorframe: So, how's the prettiest person in the world doing?

Danny, not looking up, speaking casually: I don't know, how are you babe?

Steve, voice cracking: I’m fine.

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Steve: I may have done something you told me to never do again.

Danny: …

Danny: That is a very long list.

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Danny: Okay, let’s just agree to say “I’m sorry” on the count of three. One, two, three...

Steve: …

Danny: …

Steve: …

Danny: See, now I’m just disappointed in the both of us.

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Danny: Why do I bother? He never listens.

Steve: I heard that.

Danny: Oh sure. NOW he listens.

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Grace: What exactly does that mean? ‘Friends with benefits’?

Grace: Does Uncle Steve provide Catherine with health insurance?

Danny: …

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Steve: Why are you glaring at me?

Danny: I’m not glaring, this is my face.

Steve: Your face kind of looks like it hates me today. Can you remind it that I’m actually really nice?