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@incorrectjimonquotes
Simon: Blink if you want me to kiss you
Jace: Well, I guess I'd better just shut my eyes and go to sleep then
Simon: In the middle of this bar?
Jace, eyes shut: Yup.
Simon: You know, I thought us dating would decrease this happening
Jace: Then you'd better think again
Sould you ever do any jalec themed posts?
Considering this is a jimon themed blog, I'll say no. But also because I think Jalec is very problematic. I just don't want to condone or support the idea of two brothers, even if adopted, being together romantically. Thanks for your question :)
Jace: Let's talk about how many women you've been with.
Simon: Sexually?
Jace: Yeah, no. I mean break-dance fighting.
Simon: I've got a headache
Simon: google says I'm gonna die
Jace: why is google sending you death threats for having a headache?
Simon: stop volunteering to take your shirt off. No ones asking you to take your shirt off.
Jace: can't hear you. Shirts over my ears.
Simon after watching one riverdale episode: I am weird, I don’t fit in, I don’t want to fit in! Have you ever seen me without these stupid fangs?!?
Jace: Yeah when you were a mundane you piece of trash.
Simon: hey jaaaccee~ I got something for you
Jace: love and affection?
Simon, with a snowball in his hand: what.
magnus (about jace and simon): two bros chillin in a hot tub five feet apart cuz they're Not Gay
Simon, while holding a severed arm he is eating: this part right here is the human fillet.
Jace: ...good to know.
Jace: we're going to kill people, sweetheart.
Jace: we're going to kill people so you can eat them.
Simon: you don't have to do it with me, honey.
Jace: we've been Jace and Simon since high school. I'm not going to bail on you now.
Simon: 🎶and IIIII am telling yoouu! III'm not going! You're the best man I'll eeevveerr know! There's no way I could ever go!🎶
Jace: *is staring at him*
Simon: *stops singing* why are you looking at me like that?
Jace: cause you're so-
Simon: what?
Jace: I'm in love.
Simon: oh!
*they both laugh*
Jace: I am unstoppable. Nothing will phase me.
Simon: there's a spider in your shoulder.
Jace: *shrieking*
Simon: Hey, that cloud looks like you
Jace, looking up: Where?
Simon, pointing: The one right above us
Jace: ...that one looks like a dick
Simon: I know
Jace: I hope you choke on a dick.
Simon: I hope you choke on mine.
Jace: I’m gonna kick your ass!
Simon: Go ahead!
*Simon and Jace start making out heavily*
Simon: we've reached a decision. Drum roll please?
Jace: *bangs randomly on a table*
Simon: .....close enough.
Emotion: *appears from under the mountain of supression Jace has buried it under*
Jace: *beating it with a stick* Back! Back!
Clary: *barging into Jace's room* WAKE UP SLEEPY HEAD
Jace: What the hell, Clary?
Simon: *from under the covers* Yeah Clary what the fuck?
Clary: *running out of the room* oH MY GOD