Oxford Dean: Well, you made a lot of people around this school very nervous.
Percy Shelley: Yeah? That's because they're a bunch of bitch ass white boys.
Oxford Dean: I hate to break this to you, but you're also a bitch ass white boy.

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@incorrectliteraryquotes
Oxford Dean: Well, you made a lot of people around this school very nervous.
Percy Shelley: Yeah? That's because they're a bunch of bitch ass white boys.
Oxford Dean: I hate to break this to you, but you're also a bitch ass white boy.
I know when I'm being lied to, Rosencrantz. It's like when I look at myself in the mirror and say, 'It’s going to be okay.'
Hamlet
Therapist: And what do you say when a man tells you he loves you?
Beatrice: I had rather hear my dog bark at a crow.
Therapist: ... Fair enough.
Therapist: And what do we do when we feel like this?
Hamlet: Be cruel only to be kind.
Therapist: No.
Shakespeare Plays as Brooklyn Nine-Nine Gifs
Hamlet:
Romeo and Juliet:
A Midsummer Night’s Dream:
Macbeth:
Much Ado About Nothing:
Julius Caesar:
Richard III:
Twelfth Night:
The Tempest:
Lord Byron: You said if you were ever going to do same-sex experimentation, it was going to be with me!
Percy Shelley: I have never said that to you.
Lord Byron: It has been implied.
Percy Shelley: By you.
People say it like it's a bad thing, you know, running away from your problems. But if your problems never catch up with you, what's the hitch?
Henry David Thoreau in a cabin in the woods
Harriet, you beautiful spinster, I will find you love.
Emma Woodhouse
Why do bad things always happen to mediocre people who are lying about their identities?
Algernon Moncrieff
Frodo: I can't believe Gollum betrayed us again. Why is it always the ones you most expect?
Samwise: ಠ_ಠ
Victor Frankenstein when the Monster wakes up:
The Monster:
The Great Gatsby - Chapter 9
Nick Carraway: Alright, let’s tell each other a secret about ourselves. I’m gonna go first. [To Tom Buchanan]: I hate you.
Don’t be so hard on yourself, Carey. You lost the woman of your dreams, but you still have Athelny. YOU ALL STILL HAVE ATHELNY!
Athelny
Hermia: I could strangle you
Helena: You aren't tall enough
Hermia: You've sunk low enough for me to reach
I don't want to tempt fate, but I think everything is going to be totally great forever.
Romeo to Juliet
I'll have you know that I stubbed my toe last week while watering my spice garden and only cried for 20 minutes.
John Keats
Elizabeth Bennet: You know, you could do with loosening up a bit.
Mr. Darcy: I don't do loose. I prefer tightly wound. Not shapeless with extra room for surprises.