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A: I could fix him!

B: good for you babes, I’m gonna make him worse

A: you talk mad shit for someone who sleeps with a nightlight at age 17

A: so are we gonna talk about how you dated a pick me boy?

B: are we gonna talk about how you are a pick me boy? No? that’s what i though

A: I’m way too comfortable in this class, I feel like I could mention my psychologist sex fantasies and none of you would bat an eye.

B: As a psych major, I’m batting a few eyes.

A: I love you so much dude

B: you genuinely make my life so much better man i love you

A: awwwwwww

B: anyhow now that we’ve been mushy i gotta bully you again.

A: damn 😔

A: *sobbing*

B: so I’m going to go buy us Frosty’s and hope you’re done with this when i get back. Sound good?

A: *sobbing and nodding.*

A: my self esteem may be low but my standards sure aren’t!

Zuko: I ain't never seen two good parents.

Azula: always one, if not, both of them gotta be shitty.

Insp here from @incorrectlyredacted

A: I ain’t never seen two good parents

B: always one if not both of them gotta be shitty

C: I’m getting y’all new parents

A: you think I’m gonna be alone forever?

B: oh yeah definitely, without a doubt

Old lady in the store: may I just say, you two make a lovely couple!

A and B: *clearly holding hands* we’re not together

A: we will live to see manmade horrors beyond our comprehension.

B: I’ve actually already seen the McRib

A: you’d think i’d have learned my lesson at this point

B: and yet here we are, once again puking at a waffle house

A: are we about to kiss rn 😳 👉👈

B: I was actually about to give you a black eye, but it’s nice to know where your heads at.

A: he is literally so fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuucking ugly

B: bitch I’ve known you for years let me tell you about yourself real quick. The more attractive you find someone the more you drag their appearance,

A: ok but I don’t drag his appearance THAT much

B: yesterday you said he looks like a piece of discarded foreskin,,,, you might as well have proposed marriage on the spot.

A: Fucking sobbing this kid in C’s class is dying of pneumonia. What kinda Victorian pussy ass shit bro I’m crying.

B: wait but like that’s not good???

A: no but it’s funny

B: he’s dying A

A: hey guys can we leave i really don’t want to get possessed again

B and C: AGAIN??!!?!?!?!?

incorrectlyredacted