A: I could fix him!
B: good for you babes, I’m gonna make him worse
I'd rather be in outer space 🛸

oozey mess

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Xuebing Du
h
ojovivo

@theartofmadeline
trying on a metaphor
Cosimo Galluzzi
🪼

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YOU ARE THE REASON

shark vs the universe
tumblr dot com
Sade Olutola
d e v o n

#extradirty
Noah Kahan

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@incorrectlyredacted
A: I could fix him!
B: good for you babes, I’m gonna make him worse
A: you talk mad shit for someone who sleeps with a nightlight at age 17
A: so are we gonna talk about how you dated a pick me boy?
B: are we gonna talk about how you are a pick me boy? No? that’s what i though
A: I’m way too comfortable in this class, I feel like I could mention my psychologist sex fantasies and none of you would bat an eye.
B: As a psych major, I’m batting a few eyes.
A: I love you so much dude
B: you genuinely make my life so much better man i love you
A: awwwwwww
B: anyhow now that we’ve been mushy i gotta bully you again.
A: damn 😔
A: *sobbing*
B: so I’m going to go buy us Frosty’s and hope you’re done with this when i get back. Sound good?
A: *sobbing and nodding.*
A: my self esteem may be low but my standards sure aren’t!
Zuko: I ain't never seen two good parents.
Azula: always one, if not, both of them gotta be shitty.
Insp here from @incorrectlyredacted
A: I ain’t never seen two good parents
B: always one if not both of them gotta be shitty
C: I’m getting y’all new parents
A: you think I’m gonna be alone forever?
B: oh yeah definitely, without a doubt
Old lady in the store: may I just say, you two make a lovely couple!
A and B: *clearly holding hands* we’re not together
A: we will live to see manmade horrors beyond our comprehension.
B: I’ve actually already seen the McRib
A: you’d think i’d have learned my lesson at this point
B: and yet here we are, once again puking at a waffle house
A: are we about to kiss rn 😳 👉👈
B: I was actually about to give you a black eye, but it’s nice to know where your heads at.
A: he is literally so fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuucking ugly
B: bitch I’ve known you for years let me tell you about yourself real quick. The more attractive you find someone the more you drag their appearance,
A: ok but I don’t drag his appearance THAT much
B: yesterday you said he looks like a piece of discarded foreskin,,,, you might as well have proposed marriage on the spot.
A: Fucking sobbing this kid in C’s class is dying of pneumonia. What kinda Victorian pussy ass shit bro I’m crying.
B: wait but like that’s not good???
A: no but it’s funny
B: he’s dying A
A: hey guys can we leave i really don’t want to get possessed again
B and C: AGAIN??!!?!?!?!?