Incorrect MacGyver Quotes

Quotes from other media that Team Improv would probably say. Feel free to submit quotes!

[improvidus]

[incorrectmacgyvercbsquotes]

Happy International Women’s Day

[incorrectmacgyvercbsquotes]

Mac: This was almost a great idea.

Jack: you just described 90% of your actions.

[incorrectmacgyvercbsquotes]

Matty: Can you do something for me?

Bozer: Of course.

Matty: ...And can you do a good job on it?

Bozer: Whoa, whoa, whoa, you're changing the whole deal here!

[incorrectmacgyvercbsquotes]

Matty: I don't wanna end this year on bad terms with anyone so if you have beef with me, die.

[incorrectmacgyvercbsquotes]

Murdoc: MacGyver has spoiled my plans for the last time!

Jack: Yeah, the last time today, maybe.

[incorrectmacgyvercbsquotes]

Riley: Dolphins are gay.

Mac: Dolphins can kill sharks.

Riley: Gay people can kill sharks. Doesn't make them any less gay.

[incorrectmacgyvercbsquotes]

Matty: Are you independent?

Mac: [looks at Jack]

Jack: [nods]

Mac: I would say so, yes.

[incorrectmacgyvercbsquotes]

@prettiestvisitors I spent far too long deciding which one would say which line, because it does indeed go both ways.

[incorrectmacgyvercbsquotes]

Matty: Are you independent?

Mac: [looks at Jack]

Jack: [nods]

Mac: I would say so, yes.

[incorrectmacgyvercbsquotes]

Mac: Dad, I'm bi.

James:

Mac: Bi-LINGUAL. ¿CÓMO ESTÁS?

[incorrectmacgyvercbsquotes]

Matty, standing with her back turned: I've been expecting you, Jack.

Jack: How did you do that without turning around?

Matty: ... To be perfectly honest, the first couple of people I did that to were not you.

[incorrectmacgyvercbsquotes]

Bozer: You don't get to choose your biological family.

Jack: You don't get to choose your found family either! Get in the car, Bozer!

[jimmywhistler-deactivated202301]

[Mac, Riley and Bozer are sitting on a bench] Jack: Why do you guys look so sad? Mac: Sit down with us so we can tell you. Jack: *sits down* Riley: The bench is freshly painted.

[incorrectmacgyvercbsquotes]

Jack: If I could rearrange the alphabet, the first thing I'd do is put U and I together.

Mac: If you could rearrange the alphabet, the first thing you'd do is spell SEX and then laugh about it for hours.

Jack:

Jack: You know me so well.

[incorrectmacgyvercbsquotes]

Bozer: THE FLOOR IS LAVA!

Mac: *helps Jack onto the couch*

Desi: *kicks Riley off the counter*

Bozer: As you can see, there are two types of friends.

[incorrectmacgyvercbsquotes]

MacGyver + Text Posts 100/?

[incorrectmacgyvercbsquotes]

Riley: Hey, Matty?

Matty: Yes?

Riley: Can a person breathe inside a washing machine while it's on?

Matty:

Matty: Where's Bozer?