icy

just let it all out until you're as empty as you feel

[sketchdeath]

i had a dream that "bald man summer" became a thing on this website and people started making edits of walter white and the guy from mythbusters

[cuntwarehouse]

and with your help, it can become a reality

[sketchdeath]

what hath i wrought

[stevencharleston]

[stardustemotions-deactivated202]

[tiktokmuseum]

he was in the fridge!!!

[myusersnamegoeshere]

ovbiously this person has done so much research and cares about their tortoise so much but.... the mf idea of having a live tortoise in a TUPPERWARE?! IN MY FRIDGE?? WITH ME FOOD? ahahahaha

[rattle-my-stars]

the concept of opening someone else’s fridge only to find a WHOLE ASS TORTOISE in there... idk if I’d ever recover

[blog-carmex]

@esperantoauthor when the food doesn’t come to Tesla, Tesla comes to the food

[esperantoauthor]

Reminds me of when I accidentally stumbled across this photo for the first time...

[marraphy]

mutuals put me in your fridge

[gallusrostromegalus]

Back in 2015, I went over to a classmate's house for group project work late in the fall, and in the middle of working on the presentation, offered to grab sodas for people but they were out of pepsi and Andrew whose house we were at said "Oh, there's more in the basement fridge."

So I go down to the basement, which is well-lit and finished and indeed there are more pepsi but also in the fridge is a massive tortise. This animal was the dimensions of a desktop computer and probably outweighed a labrador. It's not moving, and is set in the middle of a plastic tray so it's apparently supposed to be there. I go back upstairs.

"Hey Andrew." I say, nonchalantly. "So is the tortise in the fridge down there for soup or what?"

"The what?" says the other member of the group project. I don't remember her name, just that she always wore her hair in pigtails with butterfly clips that were based on real butterflies and she had at least a dozen species.

"Oh! No, that's Andrew Too." he says. "His species hibernates so he stays in the fridge for the holidays."

"You named your tortise after you?" I ask.

"No, uh- Well, my grandfather got him in Egypt or somewhere while he was on leave during the war and He was named Andrew, so he thought it would be funny to name him 'Andrew Too'. ...Then Mom named me after him so Gandpa left me Andrew Too in his will. He's pretty cool when he's awake. Lets us dress him up for summer holidays, doesn't bark."

"Oh!" Said Butterflies. "My dad served in the Gulf War too! What unit was he in?"

"Oh no, Grandpa was with the Royal Air Force in World War Two. Andrew Too is going to be 70 this year! We're going to make him a carrot cake!"

[halfshinyumbreon]

@gallusrostromegalus was he named after his grandfather or the tortoise

[gallusrostromegalus]

You know? I'd always assumed he was named after his grandfather but his mom was a crazy woman who ate Crasins by the handful and dressed their tortise up as a rotating cast of founding fathers for president's day so I'm not sure.

[memewhore]

[paledreamy]

THESE GLASSES HAVE SPECIAL LENSES WHICH TURN LIGHTS INTO HEARTS

edit: for everyone asking they’re called love lenses & they were $20 on lovelenses.com

[darknightwing]

Bitches really paying $20 for an astigmatism… its me, im bitches

[hotwreck]

Good news! They’re only $9 at the moment

[bitchin--wiccan]

THEY ACTUALLT WORK this changes everything

[lifeasisabella]

THESE MAKE LATE NIGHT WALKS AMAZING

The hearts are way clearer than you’d expect and they don’t mess with your vision too much to walk in them

[harrryhasmyheart]

this is how harry styles sees the world

[sensitivelilghost]

these seem like a truly necessary purchase

[adhdgooglesearches]

how to finish a task without taking a five minute break that ends up being five days long every time I try to work on it

[valtsv]

people who think i'm rude because of my adhd are wrong and idiots. i'm rude because i don't like you and don't care about what you have to say.

[valtsv]

i do have auditory processing issues but i am also just ignoring you. hope this helps.

[anxietyproblem]

[languidlyshwaits]

Damn...that me

[shadowstriker17]

Oh hey it’s me. 

[honeylemony]

The moon has a little sister!!!!!😭😭😭

[forest-moons]

I just skimmed the article, here’s what’s cool:

The minimoon is about 2 meters in diameter. It’s like the size of your couch.

If it were headed towards us it would burn up in the atmosphere. It is not headed towards us.

The short name is CD3.

They had to do extensive test to make sure that this was actually a mini Moon and not a man-made object being mistaken for a minimoon, Again. This has happened before. They are sure this time.

It’s already leaving. We captured it for about 2.9 years in orbit and it is on its way out.

Generally a minimoon is captured for only nine months so this is astonishing.

It spins a hell of a lot slower than what minimoons usually do.

The last time we had a mini moon was about 14 years ago, 2006.

[gojifan97]

I didn’t know we had a mini moon but I wish it a safe voyage through the stars.

[amirdrassil]

ok forget everything else i’ve previously said on the subject - THIS is my favourite star wars behind-the-scenes story:

[fialleril]

This is the greatest thing I have ever read.

[qthewetsprocket]

What, your Bible doesn’t have the nativity story with God’s miracle of the sentient trash bin coming to pay its respects to the baby Jesus?

[dragon-in-a-fez]

these wise men have travelled far and brought gifts of gold, frankincense, and the plans for the Death Star

[trustnoone]

[soracities]

will there ever be a punctuation mark to rival the sexiness of the em dash?

[weltenwellen]

Margaret Atwood, from “They are Hostile Nations”, Selected Poems: 1965-1975

[probablybadrpgideas]

Moon’s wet. Stars were crying. Astral rain. Moon’s wet with tears and covered in asteroids. All hell has broken loose. Families are being torn apart. Moon people have lost all hope.

[leahberman]

[luckylluminati]

“And so it seems I must always write you letters that I can never send.”

— Sylvia Plath

[noheartgirl]