"Slit My Wrists And End This Bullshit"

[inmyworldofpain]

Love sucks

Why’d you leave me, fuck it sucks thinking. Every second in my day I think and at least every second thing I do reminds me of you. I’m hurting, but I’m getting through... “as long as you’re happy”guess that’s what I said mattered to me. But now you’re happy and I didn’t look after myself. I gave you all of me and my mind and now I’m left trying to collect the pieces. I’ll get there I guess. My heart is filled with pain and confusion as to what is to come. I’m hurting everyday and I have no clue what to do. Fuck.

[inmyworldofpain]

Thoughts

As I take every day as just another day I feel more distanced from you, but I guess that’s what you wanted. You say we need to focus on ourselves yet you’re only focusing on everything else without me in it. My thoughts have come clear and I realise if you don’t want me and see my worth then why should I continue to love you and rip my own heart apart continuously thinking what I could’ve done to fix it. I warned you how I would be and I pleaded for your love and forgiveness. What I got back was less than the promised friendship. What I got back was less than explainable. How could’ve I known how you were feeling when you don’t tell me. How should I assume when I feel you love me. How should I live without you giving me the love I need? And at the end of the day it’s my fault. And as “gods” son said to thee;

Forgive me father for I have sinned.

[inmyworldofpain]

Read only when you feel strong xx

Dear miss HoneyDip 😌

It’s coming up to two in the morning and I’ve just been thinking about how the day just been was the last whole day I’ll see you. I’m thinking about how beautiful you are while you sleep next to me, I can hear the sound of your soft breath, I can feel the warmth of your skin pushed up against me for comfort, I can feel your calm aura generating from all around you. But yet I can’t seem to get myself to be calm with you. Everyone’s saying I should be excited and happy and of course I can’t wait! But no ones asked me how I’m dealing with leaving you. I’m holding up, you know smiling away, I do it for you. So you’re strong, so you feel comfortable, I do it so you’re happy also. It’s funny cause you’ve always wanted me to write about you but I could never think of what to say until now, I guess I was just shocked by you. We first met and I didn’t know what to think, I took you as a literal sign and I knew we would click. It was weird. That night was one of the most adventurous night I did. I didn’t think I’d stay with you. At the very beginning I thought you wasn’t my type but it soon all came clear when we kicked it more and more and you showed me your true self and I fell in love. Your perfect eyes and your perfect smile make me sink in with love, your voice and the way you sing and your perfect hair makes my heart drop And when you put all that together you leave me breathless. You make me the happiest young man and I couldn’t thank you enough for the love and support you give me relentlessly and I wouldn’t change you for no other person or object in this universe.

I’ve cried my self to sleep these last couple of nights with you, trying to feel your touch for the last time I feel( I know it may not be the last time but ) stroking my hands down your hair and listening to your breaths. You are the most beautiful human being, inside and out, and you do not deserve any mother fucker to dim your shine okay I will be here for you tj whenever you need okay. I’ll be right to you. I can not express how much you have made me happy and changed my perception on life and help me grow not only with myself but grow as a man and only you know how much that means to me. I’m dreading Friday baby and I’m scared of leaving the love of my life and I wish we can travel the world someday ay, I wish we could do a lot of things tbh. I just feel we could’ve done more together ❤️

I’m scared that when I leave you’ll go backwards and won’t have anyone to cheer you back up 😣 I’m scared that when I leave I’m going to become lonely and won’t have anyone to hold tight at night but I’ll be strong for you and for myself. We will be strong for eachother . I love you with all inches of my soul forever

June 22 , 2:22 AM

❤️I’m not sure if I said you’re the best thing to ever happen to me and you deserve for the most perfect life and I wish all the happiness in the world on you my love ❤️

[wildestlovers]

[inmyworldofpain]

28/7/16

An once again she's gonna let the one she loves come back to her, the one he doesn't deserve, to in the end hurt her and let him still think she's just another girl 😠 I pray she will be happy x

[inmyworldofpain]

2 am

It's 2:20 fucking am, I can't stop but wonder why this happened and why this always happened. I like you a lot and I know you still in love with him. I know in the end I'll get hurt but in the end of it you're worth every second of pain as long as I've had the time to see you for you and see what makes you you. I know you don't wanna hurt me but I'm only Mason and I'd rather me hurt than you beautiful. Os

[inmyworldofpain]

2/7/16

2:10 AM~ She distanced herself...

[princeturtogo]

I’d like to give you everything you never had, but not even then would you know how beautiful it is to love you

Frida Kahlo (via lethalics)

Fuck

[inmyworldofpain]

25/6/17

I'm unsure of what the future holds but I honestly hope it has her in it. Words can't explain the feelings I get when seeing her it's so unusual. Her smile is so so so perfect, her eyes, lips, body Ughhhh... I've like become attached to her and I can't stop thinking.. She likes me slightly maybe but she still likes him and he's not good for her 😔

[inmyworldofpain]

MJCL

[kaliforhnia]

[inmyworldofpain]

22/09/15

This girl that i hugged. She asks me to block this chick and i feel like she is lying because she says she wont want me to get hurt. But i think thats not the full reason. SHe is in so much pain. This society supresses the happiness. I’m here to help those in need. I see so much pain. I met this other girl a while ago but she had a boyfriend. He treated her wrong and i want to treat her right. I want to make her happy. SHe needs time but im prepared to wait.

[inmyworldofpain]

21/9/15

IT’s funny how you meet someone and it lights up your world huh? IVe met so many gals and guys over the past month and they all make my life so much better. I’ve finnaly gotten over Ella. I’m looking to make someone happy. I envy whoever is smaking a girl happy. I want that job. I was hugging this chickk and shit and thought something clicked or whatever. Na nt really she got a boyfriend. Down buzz. She’s so pretty. But i will find another pretty lass to make me hapy and i can make happy. I see so much sadness in our generation. So many cuts and pain. I wish a girl would confront me or tell me hwo she feels and i would feel the same way. Life isn’t that simple. I want to meet new people. I want to learn new things, I want to Help and save evryone. Life isn’t that simple.

[inmyworldofpain]

7/09/15

I had a really good party! Really good. SO many friends made... TOday ella drew this buddha thingy. I commented and she started talking to me. Nothing to big but still. Then i put up status and it saidd” LIke for convo” she liked it then unliked it but i’m not sure if im ready to talk to her or if i should at all... i had pretty much nearly forgotten about what happened then she mesaged me :/ UGGGHHHHHGGHGHGHHGHGHGH!! Fucken helll

[inmyworldofpain]

30/08/15

I kinda miss her but nnot as much. I lost my walet with 130 dollars for my half ounce :( someone found it tho :D. I met this chick. She’s so lovely... I want her... I wish i could see her! but at times she seems hurt and at times it seems like im the only light that she can see in this dark world. This is why i want to be there for her. She’s all the way in perth or something tho :/ 3 hours away :/. But when i go to Straya i hope to see her! She seems so nice but is so crowded by darkness. It’s funny how i like help one person then move onto the next when they get annoyed with me... I feel like she gonna get annoyed with me. She’s so sexual at times tho ahahahahah... She likes me for meee and commpliments mee. I like that. She’s alot like me in a way..

[inmyworldofpain]

26/08/15

Last night she told me really simply she doesn’t want to know me. I’m gonna say i’m sick of her shit. Not sure if i am tho... I’m gonna say i’m done caring for her. Not sure if i am tho... Oh well her loss i guess... I hope she someday feels the way i feel about her to someone and they do the same she has done to me or i have done to myself :/ then she will truly understand...

[inmyworldofpain]

25/08/15

This annoys me. I hope we become friends or something idek what we are right now... I wonder if she misses me or thinkos about me as much as i think of her... :/ :’(