
if i look back, i am lost
Claire Keane

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@innerdragontreerascal
They don’t tell you that when you get to nearly 600 pounds every single time you have to stand up it’s like doing a deadlift or a squat at max capacity. I need an assistant or an exoskeleton.
Looks like Big Cozy’s gotten noticeably bigger since he stopped playing college ball 👀
What have you been up to? 👀
Life! I've recently finished up the last year of my degree, and concurrently I've been working on my business (which I will not elaborate much on for privacy ;) ) Besides that it's been a pretty normal routine for me, nothing too exciting. But of course, the question I think a lot are wondering... did I gain? Yes, almost certainly! How much? I'm not sure. I would guess right now I'm somewhere between 530-550. My gain has always been unintentional- just a side effect of the kind of lifestyle I like to lead. And being totally honest, it's higher than I want it to be. I'm looking to make some changes, and bring it closer to the 350-400lbs range.
I really just c a n n o t resist
What difficulties do you face being your current size? Have you found that anything has changed between now and when you last posted, in terms of navigating the world as a fat person?
Let me tell you, 500lbs+ changes everything Reaching that number hits you hard, mentally and physically. I never really saw myself as a feedee or a gainer- my whole life I've just been a fat guy! Living his life like everyone else. It was a slow, unintentional creep towards this size. Every day was the same as before. My body adjusted and got stronger, and I never really noticed a difference. I lived basically the same life at 400lbs as I did at 200lbs. But now it's obvious that was never going to last. There's a human limit, only so much a body can gain and endure before it really starts to... struggle. I found out first hand that 500lbs is that limit. Everything is exhausting at this size. Think about this, cause I never did- just for me to get out of bed, the first thing most people do every day, I have to lift HUNDREDS OF POUNDS. Can you imagine that, if tomorrow morning you woke up and you were stuck in bed until you could somehow manage to lift an extra, let's say 350lbs with you? But that's not all, you wouldn't be done! You've gotta carry it everywhere you go, every single step of your day. What compromises would you start to make, what would you cut out of your routine? Everything you do has to be planned and considered. What's the absolute minimum amount of walking you can do. Scope out and research all the pictures of somewhere you wanna go, is there seating and will you fit or break it? I used to enjoy grocery shopping- now I get everything delivered. I used to love going for walks at night- now I stay in bed. I used to go to pubs or restaurants or to the cinema with my friends- now they have to come over to order in food and watch a movie, or we just play games online. And I'm not complaining! I did it to myself, and I knew what I was doing. But yeah, how has 500lbs changed the way I navigate the world? I simply cannot fully navigate the world anymore, I'm just too damn fat for it (I'm leaving a lot unsaid here, I might go into more depth if enough people are interested)
Piggy couldn’t even wait till he got home to tuck into the eggnog 🐷
this is from Dec. 2025, I was thinking about eggnog earlier and just had to find this clip. I must’ve been drinking like 8L of eggnog a week at the time, I wish I took a pic of my recycling bin for proof 😂
(P.S. sorry about the terrible audio. I’ll make even better chugging clips later this year!) ❤️
Denial
Imagining a feeder who actively makes sure you don’t realize you’ve gotten massively fat. They size up your clothes without you ever noticing, never make comments about how big you are but how small you are. Lying about how there should be faster results, telling you that you should eat more followed by a painful stuffing. When you scroll places like tumblr admiring fellow gainers, seeing how big some people have made themselves, you start to realize how you look bigger than them. Your gut hangs lower, your thighs explode out of any pants and stretch marks cover your bulging belly. You tell your feeder this and they say how people always look smaller online, that you still have a long way to go to be as big as the fatties you once dreamt of becoming. All the while knowing that they had made you far bigger long ago and the only way to keep you going is to get you to a point where turning back is no longer an option.
Love seeing a fit, sexy jock become the cautionary tale his friends and family would have warned him to avoid. Buddy went from trim and buff to lardy and lazy. A fall from grace for an absolute stud.
Always skinny, 68kg by 2022. And over 175kg by 2026
Unintentional gains. He documented everything trying to lose weight, but always gained more back.
"The guys on site keep calling me 'their heaviest company asset.' Smartasses. I started this job pouring foundations and framing houses. Now, I spend more time framing burgers between coffee breaks. By the look of this gut, I'd say I've been working on a different kind of construction project..."