Is It All About Willpower?
I was browsing the covers of magazines and I found it overwhelming to see how many taglines (Check out this revolutionary innovation, …Best Body Ever, Get Your Children to Study, Nations Vulnerable to Climate Change, etc.) had to do with some form of transformation. Modification seemed to be the red line running though everything from technology, sports and personal appearance. These covers reminded me that whether animal, vegetable or mineral, we have to deal with change at some level. It constantly surrounds and pushes us towards something different.
In addition to driving us onward, change seems to divide humanity into two camps – those who embrace change and those who resist it. I believe this is one of those instances where resistance truly is futile; our mere existence constitutes a litany of modifications from the moment we are conceived until the day we leave this life. Why do so many people avoid change, if it is integral to our being and the world in which we live? Looking at those most magazines it summons up deep western perceptions that change is just a matter of deciding to be different and willing yourself to take certain steps to make that happen. The idea self-discipline is the cornerstone of all change can be off putting especially those struggling to “revolutionize their lives,” in 30 days or less. In western culture we tend to quickly label others and ourselves as failures in the face of our inability to make immediate adjustments. Over time, a lack of resolve can takes hold and our lack of progress becomes a source of embarrassment. Feeling like you lack some special aspect of character, that only the strong-willed can possess, can become a source of incredible shame, which makes most transitions a nightmare or seemingly impossible.
Determination is not enough, especially when it comes to systemic and behavioural shifts. Willpower can only take a person so far, because most progressions are a matter of recurrent choices towards a particular path and successful choices are usually supported by our internal belief systems. If mere will could do the trick, then we just think ourselves thin if we struggles with our weight and it would happen easily, companies could execute new organisation protocol by simply stating a new vision and requiring allegiance. After over two decades of work experience with people determining or executing new directions, I have never witnessed a new regime suffer an easy coup.
Authentic transformation comes through acceptance
What makes people commit to a completed change usually begins with acceptance. Why acceptance? All great shifts start with an acknowledgement and ratification of where we are at present. In simpler terms, you can’t go from point A to point B without considering the starting point of, otherwise there is no point in taking the journey. If you cannot recognise where you are it is easy to get lost or lose sight of where you are going and why you needed to go there in the first place. Creating schemes that are based on sheer inclinations alone are usually short lived.
I admire companies like Zappos, which became successful by actively remaining in constant flux and what I observed to be the exacting practice of acceptance. The leadership constantly examines their current reality as a platform for systemic organisational changes. They are rigorous in accepting and recognising shortcomings to generate solutions in line with their core belief to “deliver Wow through service,” and it pays off for them time and again. It is no surprise that Zappos employees embrace their dynamic work environment so readily and apply those same principles in their personal lives.
Examining your current unsatisfactory predicament or a process that has become useless with grace and humility allows space for an accounting of what lead us to this place. Understanding and acceptance are the door and doorway to discovering adversarial behaviours and beliefs, which erode motivation. But they are also the bridge toward harnessing the energy we derive from imagining and executing core desires, beliefs and dreams can help us lean into change. From this perspective we can generate goals that are no longer necessary evils, rather collection desirable choices or habits that we adopt. When things don’t work out as planned, acceptance helps us to get back on track. Where failed willpower can lead to shame, acceptance helps us to recover our active enthusiasm after a crisis. Let’s face it, enthusiasm outruns and outlasts willpower every time.
If you want to know about the Zappo’s story read Delivering Happiness: A Path to Profits, Passion, and Purpose by Tony Heish or go to http://deliveringhappiness.com
Picture from quotespicturesandimages.com
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