Thought bubble...

So I like to go on rants a lot and instead of clogging up my personal tumblr I decided to do this instead. So here are the ramblings of someone who is technically considered an adult!

[internalramblingsofmadi]

Things I want to accomplish by 2025...

-Marry the love of my life or at least be engaged (Linwood 🥰)

-Move our of my parents house for good

-Go back to college

-Establish an AOII Chapter at whatever college I go to if they don’t already have one

-Have or be working towards a job where I can make a difference in children’s life.

-See my best friend happy and not stuck like we currently are.

-Become and official member of the Main Street Players board.

-Find the courage to sing again

-Be in a friends wedding or help a friend plan a wedding because I want to see my friends happy and loved

-Adopt a dog.

-See my theater kids have an actual graduation

-Travel outside of the US

-Do something to make my future kids proud.

[internalramblingsofmadi]

-We’re engaged, hoping to get married in 2026.

-Haven’t moved out of my parents house yet but working on it.

-Still not sure if I want to do this but I am taking pharmacy tech classes

-AOII is such an important part of my life but I feel it is a chapter that has closed but I do hope to pass the legacy on.

-I provide rx care to a number of patients including children so I’ll count it.

-she’s living it up on top in New York but I hope to see her thrive more and more every day.

-I’m now officially the Assistant Director and Stage Manager for all of our productions!

-I’m singing more but not where I want to be but I am putting in an effort.

-I got to be a part of a childhood best friends wedding from her bachelorette party to the day of and it was so special to get to be a part of it.

-I have my adorable little mutt that I’ve had for 3 years now and we have a momma cat who has 5 babies

-they didn’t get to have one but they have all moved on a thrived and I’m so proud of them.

-still on a bucket list but I have got quite a bit of traveling in

-I’m just working on making the future kids at this point.

5 years later….

[thesigilwitch]

I was just about to spiral into a bad panic attack, and my boyfriend goes "Stick an ice cube in your mouth." I'm not really sure where he got the idea, and I kinda laughed at it because I didn't see how it would help, but he was insistent. So I did it.

And now I'm on my second cube, because it worked.

[thesigilwitch]

He explained his reasoning to me when he got home.

1. I would initially think "what the fuck" and be distracted from the anxiety. (Correct.)

2. The cold of the ice would shock my system, bringing me back to the physical world and reality, drawing my focus to the cold in my mouth, and keep my brain away from thinking "I'm panicking, I must be dying." (Correct.)

3. He assumed I hadn't drank much water today and wanted to keep me hydrated. (Triple correct.)

[pigeonwithaknife]

It also forced your mouth to make saliva!

When you go into fight or flight mode, non-crucial body functions stop working so you have more energy to do what you need to do to survive (oooor to spiral into a panic attack). By forcing yourself to make saliva it helps calm you down because since fight or flight is an all or nothing response, they can’t happen at the same time.

Learned that from my old therapist, who would use it with veterans with ptsd

[queer-papayas]

I’m doing this right now and its working????

[autumnsnuggling]

THIS! Do this!

Anxiety is an emotional thing BUT there are feedback systems in place in your body that pay attention to physical states as well, which is why you then experience raised heart rate and so on when anxious. Eliminate or confuse one feedback system? Reduce anxiety.

Go be free!

[smute]

biting into a lemon also works

[k-phoenix]

Btw, this is part of Dialectic Behavioural Therapy, DBT for short, which was invented by a woman with borderline. It doesn't only work with panic attacks but also self harm, negative thought spirals, and sometimes even intrusive flashbacks.

Eating very spicey stuff works as well. I used to keep little packets of wasabi in my jacket, and that saved me more times I can count.

[teenagesophiebennett-deactivate]

you know parents make such a big deal about explaining homosexuality to their children but when I was a kid I watched a show where one of the villains was a satanic cross-dressing lobster and never once questioned it

[erevshelshoshanim]

You never once questioned why a character meant to be a gay man was portrayed as satanic and evil?

[steeeeeevn]

As a five year old in the 90’s, I can assure I was not aware of the socio-political ramifications of the cartoons I watched. My apologies.

[internalramblingsofmadi]

Facts about me:

-I am a hufflepuff in every sense of the word and proud. And I use that to describe not because I’m obsessed with Harry Potter (I am though) but because it’s the best way to describe me.

-I love sunflowers and the color yellow and lemon flavored treats

-I drink Dr. Pepper and Extra Sweet Tea and Lemonade more than anything else

-I can shoot whiskey, sip wine, and shotgun a beer. Though my favorite drink is a crown and sprite.

-I don’t identify as anything. The closest thing would be pansexual. Thought I was bisexual for a while but then I realized I don’t care boy or girl or what you have down there I more so care about who you are as a person.

-My person is the sweetest person who never treated me like anything other than exactly who I am and has loved me endlessly since day 2.

-I say Day 2 because we met in high school but we were completely different people then. We’ve both been broken and shattered and put together so many different times before we met each other again and it was that second time where our broken puzzle pieces fit together.

-I was sexually assaulted when I was 21 years old.

-I was raised Christian but I don’t follow the Christian faith anymore necessarily. I believe there is a reason we are on this planet and I believe their is a higher power but ultimately I feel that as long as you do everything through love you are following the right path and will end up where you need to be.

-I connect to songs in so many ways. I can sort of sing but will never be famous for singing, at least not singing well. I love to dance and be silly while doing so.

-I am me.

[internalramblingsofmadi]

Things I want to accomplish by 2025...

-Marry the love of my life or at least be engaged (Linwood 🥰)

-Move our of my parents house for good

-Go back to college

-Establish an AOII Chapter at whatever college I go to if they don’t already have one

-Have or be working towards a job where I can make a difference in children’s life.

-See my best friend happy and not stuck like we currently are.

-Become and official member of the Main Street Players board.

-Find the courage to sing again

-Be in a friends wedding or help a friend plan a wedding because I want to see my friends happy and loved

-Adopt a dog.

-See my theater kids have an actual graduation

-Travel outside of the US

-Do something to make my future kids proud.

[redlipgloss-deactivated20191124]

you know when you love someone and it's just like.. i would like to make some soup for you

[bakwaaas]

someone said ‘the version of me you created in your mind is not my responsibility’ and wow

[one-abuse-survivor]

Me: I’m scared I might secretly be an awful person and I’m just fooling everyone into thinking I’m good.

Therapist: the fact that you care so deeply about being a bad person is proof that you’re actually good. Bad people don’t mind being bad.

Me: oH NO, I have fooled her too,

[internalramblingsofmadi]

It’s so weird being in love. Having someone who knows you sometimes better then you know yourself, having someone who supports you when you can’t stand on your own two legs, having someone that fits you so well that you may as well share one brain cell. I’m truly so lucky because I have found the person who has to be this earth’s version of a soulmate.

[musingofapoeticsoul]

[internalramblingsofmadi]

I did 💛

[musingofapoeticsoul]

[deep-mind-thoughts]

[ithelpstodream]

bringing this one back

[feamir]

When I went to see Tangled with my family, I was terrified of having to talk about the movie afterwards because I related so much to Rapunzel, and I was sure my mom would hate the movie because it was so obvious that she was exactly like mother gothel. So when mom asked me afterwards if I liked it I gave a tepid non-answer. But then my mom started talking about how she loved the movie! And it slowly dawned on me that she also saw mother gothel as evil and abusive, but somehow didn’t make the connection that she and her were the same. My mom even made a comment to the effect of how, like rapunzel’s real mom, her love for me would always triumph or whatever. And she didn’t get it!

She didn’t see the similarities of how she locked me away in the house, or how she kept me under the tightest supervision under the guise of keeping me safe. I spent the entire mother knows best song stealing glances at her next to me in the theater just waiting for her to drag us out of the movie because she couldn’t stand to have her “love” portrayed as evil. And she didn’t see how the fact that she created her identity completely around being a mother and nothing else was like mother gothel’s dependency on rapunzel’s magic hair.

It was only after seeing her positive reaction to the movie, that I really understood the meaning of the phrase “everyone is the hero of their own story”. No one actually thinks they’re the villain, even if confronted with a painfully obvious rendering of their own actions done by someone they agree is rightly portrayed as evil.

[theechrysalisamidst]

“everyone is the hero of their own story”. No one actually thinks they’re the villain, even if confronted with a painfully obvious rendering of their own actions done by someone they agree is rightly portrayed as evil.

[bemylova]

i’m such a slut for reassurance my heart literally nuts when you tell me you want me

[oldpaintings]

Ballet Dancers by Delphin Enjolras (French, 1857–1945)

[tinypixiie]

🌸 * : ☁️ . ﾟ✧ 🧚🏻‍♀️ * . 🌷 : * .🐝 . *

i want a garden filled with strawberries n an entire field of flowers

🌸 * : ☁️ . ﾟ✧ 🧚🏻‍♀️ * . 🌷 : * .🐝 . *

[love]