Self conciousness is slowly taking over me again. Im trying so hard to deal with myself by just joking around but it starts to sting a little harder everytime. While it may seem funny on the outside, its tearing me apart on the inside. Yes i know whatever is bothering me shouldnt really matter but as much as im trying it just takes over me completely often. I really wanna stop crying when im alone. Seems simple enough to do but im finding it hard to do so everytime. Fuck. Fuckfuckfuckfuck. Its something i really wanna just scream out. Why do i feel this way? I shouldnt be complaining because i know there are more things to worry about than just myself. Im being really selfish. Really, really selfish.












