An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works
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One Nice Bug Per Day

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@ipainkiller1999
An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works
New chapter is out! Enjoy~
I love that Harper as a newborn looks like a wrinkly rotten fruit and then a few months later when she has her fur she's the most adorable thing imaginable <3
she gets it from vic š«¶
Yo so I know itās been a while since you did your dispatch Steven universe au (so lowkey feel free to ignore this) but what if Toxic and Robertās fusion was named Borealis? Like the thing in the sky cuz like both sorta crave freedom and with Robert having a whole star motif in a lot of dispatch art and stuff and the fact that the thingy in the sky only appears rarely (like itās hiding like how the fusion was stated to be made to do) it sorta sounds like it fits (???) idk :3 anyways, love ur work btw, hope ur having a good day :)
mousy... you're a GENIUS -> the way i literally flew out of bed to answer this, i'm literally SOOO sleepy rn but this is SO. GOOD. and boom, i was inspired to touch this au again. apologies if it's a little... incoherant. i'm just.. SO EXCITED to ramble
Astral Projection: āØpart 5⨠part 1 | part 2 | part 3 | part 4 | Malachite the way this au is even named in star theme..
so- what's REALLY cool about this: Borealis is an actual jewelry making term for glass rhinestones or beads coated in an iridescent and shimmery coating [in other words: synthetic gems or costume jewelry] -> And yk what both Toxic and Robert are in this au? Synthetic, man-made, gems. Toxic moreso than Robert, but neither of them are natural.
They don't talk when they first make Borealis, and they don't talk after- when Robert is unconscious and Toxic is flighty- so the name doesn't actually come up until Toxic finally drags himself out of the ocean some months later
[-and, you know... of course, breaks into his house. Or, breaks into Flambae's house- because Robert still lives with him, despite no longer being in danger of keeling over and impaling himself] [His algae spotted hand reaches down to tap at Robert's forehead, nails carefully curled in as to not scratch his gem, but-] Toxic, whispering: Hey, lose- ack! [...Robert grabs his wrist before he can make contact, and aggressively switches their positions. Toxic ends up sprawled on the bed, the half-gem straddling his hips, with a fist geared up to break his fucking nose] Robert, barely managing to pull back before it makes contact: What the fu- Toxic? Toxic: Hey [His eyes flick down] Toxic: Cute pjs Robert: Shut up. Toxic, grinning and reclining into the mattress: Pf- why? Are you embarrass-hmpfg! Robert, with his hand clamped over his mouth: No, I mean actually, shut the fuck up. Do you know how late it is right now?
all in all, it's very reminescent of their first meeting -> except, this time, Robert doesn't toss him off the balcony. Toxic just goads him into 'sneaking out'. They're grown men- things- that can go where they want to whenever. This is unnecessary. But...
"You're saying you never snuck out of as a kid? Seriously?" *Robert scoffs, mouth full of a spoon of frozen yogurt or some other typical late night sneak-out treat, and points to his forehead- his Azurite gem foreign in the way it sits so pretty* "...oh. Even as a kid-? That's fucked up, man."
His own hand comes up to brush the shards embedded in his neck, before he forces himself to relax again -> On some level, from what they did not.. really all that long ago, he knew that. He knew Robert was just as much a lab rat as he was, even if he never asked for it. It's just another thing to hear it out loud.
So they don't talk about it- they don't really talk about what they saw from each other's eyes. They just.. sorta sit, in the night-dead quiet of Beach City with their treats, and they look up their respective gems under the stars until they show each other their phones for the final time- and come to nearly the same result
Borealis, the hiding greenish-blue sky phenomena Borealis, painted on a glass bead "Why are you looking at stars." "I got bored looking at rocks." "..you're a rock!"
An actual Malachite and Azurite might not make what they did- might not even come close- an actual trio of gems might make something real
But they're not real- they're fakes: synthetic charms that have been strung on the same line, for the same play, and left to gather dust in the same storage box
Iām just going to say tbat Inko and Robert will be open to poly (so that way either sonar or Flambaeās can join) and also Iām just imagining Flambae seeing the burn scars (from Bakugouās quirk) on Izuku and being so fucking angry
Yeah, these two read "there's room in our bed for more". Might be surprisingly freaky in the sheets, but at the end of the day they're both looking for someone who treats both them and their son right. <3
Bakugo seeing Izuku again after the school break, only to see an entire squad of furious superheroes beside him like bodyguards.
(Also Flambae sees a lot of his younger self in Bakugo, and doesn't want him to go down that dark path.)
Fun fact! All we know about Izuku's (supposed) biological father Hisashi is that
He's currently abroad.
He can breathe fire.
Remember a handsome son-of-a-gun we've been discussing in the "snake hybrid au"?
That feel when the cute twunk at the bar is your co-husband to your wife whom you've been estranged because of being excommunicated from the yakuza.
Inko's taste in men range very wildly.
OH MY - yes. All of the yeses!!! Inko, who wasn't aware of her husband's deal with the yakuza, so he tells her he's going to work abroad?? Uuuught, the angst!!! Imagine that Inko still loves him. Robert puts things together and finds a way for these two to communicate again, because he'll be damned if Izuku goes another day without his dad (who very much misses him). Is it a bit of projection from Rob's part? Mayhaps! But it's at the end of the day a kind act.
Inko taste in men is wild and yet surprisingly cohesive. Direct man with reptilian attributes. She has fantastic taste.
Wait... would Inko join the polycule? (,,ā.ā,,) Omg that'd be so cute.
Robert reunites the family, despite believing that he'll be awkward third wheel. Only to be pulled into the biggest gotdang group hug by Inko and her giant dragon husband. He's puzzled but not complaining.
Inko gets many boyfriends, and bonus co-parents for her Izuku. <3
Also imagery of tiny adorable Izuku with his giant tattoo'ed ex-yakuza fire-breathing Papa.
One look at the man puts the fear of god into his classmates. XD
By the time All Might enters the picture Izuku is gonna have soooo many skills in his belt, just by the virtue of having Janelle and Robert as parents. Izuku was a really good tactian in canon, have Robert teach him more? Boy could be scary.
Katsuki's bullying is gonna suffer a quick death the moment dragon papa puts his sights on him, not to mention Izuku's other parents. Goofy as some maybe, they don't fcuk around with their kid's well being. But as you said before, Katsuki probably reminds some of the Z-teamers of themselves (specially Chad and Courtney) so I can see them trying to subtle help him grow out of his destructive insecurities while also giving him some shit for his nasty attitude. Some tought love.
Izuku's classmates gonna be so jealous that he's got so many parents/mentors (some of them their idols!)!
Izuku takes one look at the Todoroki situation and tells Robert. Robert acquires new son.
Oooooh, Endeavor!! Count your days, buddy :)
Nah but fr, that could easily lead into finding about what happened to Toya and spiral from there. The Todoroki children, ALL of them, end up addopted by the most vicious polycule in existence, and then it could extend to Kimiko (I've been very fond lately of the idea of Sonar and Coop growing a soft spot for her) and even Tenko. LOV ends up never forming, all because the power of love. Ironic.
Izuku's classmates will be jelaous until they join the training regime. Only Izuku doesn't collapse by the end of it XD
Hilarious thought
Mecha Man visits Japan in his early-mid career, where he's approached by a woman. White-haired, and so very tired. She's seen him on the news. A legacy hero.
Rei: "They say you followed your father's footsteps." Robert: "I did. Though I admit, I mostly did so because I figured I had nothing else." Rei: "Are you happy?" Robert, surprised by the question: "I... where does this come from?" Rei: (*pained expression*) Robert, sensing something deep and personal: "I'm... absolutely fucking miserable really. Any happiness I have I've made on my own." Rei, gaze lowers, her mind made: "Thank you for your honesty, Mecha Man."
All four Todoroki children, from scrappy Touya to newborn Shoto, and their mother seek asylum outside of Japan. Endeavour's plans for a legacy crumbles with the testimony of a single Quirkless hero who likely won't know the impact he made.
Toga Himiko finds maternal love with a sharp winged assassin who sees this blood-drinking "monster" and only sees a little girl. One that reminds her of herself. Her new Maman teaches her daughter how to spin her blades and her feet with the grace of a fairy.
"Z Team stop improving the lives of MHA characters"-challenge /jk
Ok but Jenelle/Coop seeing lil Himiko and just deciding mine nowā¦.actually I kinda want her to tell Punch up i have found the most adorable precious child for us to raise since her bio parents cannot handle or understand her nature and need for blood. Before holding her out for punch to see and as no Z teamer would back downā¦
Coop: I have obtained a child and the parents signed over custody to me, ignore the the blood drops on the paperwork, meet my daughter and your new niece!
Every looks at coop confused until punch smiles.
Punch up: I always wanted a daughter! Hello there, Iām your new pa but you can also call me punch or Colm if you prefer!
Dispatch x My Hero Academia crossovers are hilarious because it immediately shuts down the whole "Can a Quirkless/Powerless person become a hero?" question with a solid "Fuck yeah."
Mecha Man going to public conventions and panels for the first time in forever, at the behest of Mandy, to drum up support for SDN in other regions.
This is where he discovers that the Powered-to-Unpowered ratio in a lot of places is more lopsided. Japan for example; has only a quarter of their population be without powers or mutation - and that's heavily leaning towards the older population.
SDN is asked to send representatives to a special Q&A panel at Musutafu Hero Con. Apparently the event planner believes that showing a more community-focused approach to superheroism will help steer people away from the oversaturated agency market.
Blazer agrees wholeheartedly - offering to send the Z-Team and other SDN employees on a fully-paid trip to Japan while the Torrance branch is being rebuilt.
The Z-Team don't even try fighting the offer - a vacation "just" to speak for a few hours at a convention? Sign them up!
(Depending on how strict air travel is in this universe - the planes are fitted with power-dampeners to prevent... incidents.)
Robert is asked to appear as Mecha Man - as non-powered supers are exceedingly rare in Japan, even in the modern day. Robert agrees, as long as he can bring the Mech Suit + doesn't have to attend the dispatcher's panel.
Robert underestimates how big a deal Mecha Man is in Japan.
When Mecha Man Blue hops on stage at a con and is introduced as THE Quirkless Super Hero!?! The crowd goes nuts. There's a massive crowd of fans wearing Mecha Man merchandise from across different eras, licensed and fan-made. There's older people waving Mecha Man Prime banners, and families dressed as different generations of Mecha Men.
Robert is honestly a little overwhelmed?
When it finally comes to the Q&A portion Mecha Man is asked;
How was he trained? - "Home school and a lot of self-teaching."
Is the Mech Suit the same one as Astral's? - "Not entirely. Since my dad's suit was damaged in an explosion almost a year ago, a fantastic technician helped to design the new suit while using materials from the older model."
Were you born Quirkless, or was your Quirk taken away? - "Still getting used to the Quirk terminology, but I was born without powers of any kind... And I'm pretty sure I never picked one up along the way."
Who is your toughest foe? - "Besides Shroud? I'd say a certain arsonist I now work with." ("You flatter me, Mecha Dick.")
It's the final question, asked by a nervous little boy wearing an All-Might hoodie, that gives the hero pause.
Izuku: "Can I still become a hero? Even if I don't have a Quirk?"
Robert looks at the question asker carefully. The kid has restrained hopeful look as if he's preparing himself for disappointment.
Robert looks over the crowd of fans once more.
Back in the States - Mecha Man was "just" a legacy hero. Grandpa Bobby was the first of his kind, and many more followed.
The people here have yet to have their own Quirkless hero rise up.
Robert: "Yes. But only if you work hard at it. Not having powers will put you a great disadvantage yes, but you're foes will never know what next trick is up your sleeve. I'm at a slightly unfair advantage as the third in the line of Mecha Men - but I know how it feels when you think you're powerless. So yes, you can become a hero without a Quirk." (*awed silence fails over the crowd. the little boy's eyes well with happy tears.*) Robert: "And if anyone says otherwise, I will personally kick their ass."
His closing statement makes the room erupt into laughter and cheers.
The little boy is blubbering thank yous as the mic operator has him step back into the crowd.
Robert spends the rest of the convention signing autographs and meeting people who've always admired Mecha Man - in any form.
It's the kids that really get him though.
The little boy with the All-Might hoodie will later ask Mecha Man to sign so many posters and toys (Robert didnt even know they made plushies), and introduce himself as Izuku Midoriya aka Deku.
Robert: "Deku? Oh! Like the cool shrub guys from Legend of Zelda! I'll make sure to keep an ear out if I ever hear that name on the airwaves!"
The boy faints from joy, much to Robert's surprise.
Mecha Man isn't the only hero with his own fanclub.
Sonar and Golem are nearly mobbed by people with obvious mutations and hybrid traits. A little boy with a covered face and membraned arms tells Sonar that he's his hero. Sonar is so proud that he turns Megabat.
A boy with a rocky face asks Golem in a whisper if he likes animals. Golem smiles wide and tells him of the time he babysat a tiger.
Malevola is taking a selfie with a little girl with pink skin and horns. A girl crowned with thorns asks her religious questions, and is puzzled when the demoness says she's Atheist.
Coupe is showing a pair of children (one physical, the other confined to shadows) how her wings work. A little girl with sharp teeth and a wild expression asks her if she needs blood to fuel her power - Coupe answers calmly "Infrequently. Mostly I enjoy the taste."
Punch Up is showing off his strength to a number of people born with height deformities.
Flambae nearly gets in trouble for telling an explosive child to "Don't talk about people like that, you little shit!" - after the kid said a derogatory term for Quirkless people.
Waterboy meets a froggy little girl that compliments his wetsuit. And a swarm of children with life-altering Quirks say he inspired them to become a heroes. He's so flustered that he can barely speak.
Prism records a mini music video with the daughter of musicians. She tells her that they can collaborate whenever she wants. A little blonde boy shows off his Prism-inspired hero outfit, with her approval.
Invisigal nearly collides with her first super-fan - a little girl who's body turned permanently invisible when she was very young, and wishes she could control it like her. Visi wheezes with pride.
Many of Phenomaman's fans are people who feel "alien" in some way, not just physically.
Overrall, it's a very eye-opening experience.
Ok but can you imagine that Robert noticed burn marks on the kid who ask him if he could be a hero without a quirk? Or if him and Flambae see a kid with an explosion quirk about to hurt him for esring asking such a question?
Can you imagine Robert taking this sweet kid under his wings?
Accidental mentor team-up moment with Robert assuring lil Izuku that he could 100% become a hero.
Meanwhile Flambae is holding Katsuki by the scruff of the neck like he's a misbehaving dog - reprimanding the parents and surrounding adults for not correcting his violent behaviour. ("This the kinda shit my madar would send me to boot camp over! And he's out here attacking other kids!? You know where this shit leads to!? Solitary confinement! Can confirm!")
Flambae: you keep acting this that little green kid is going to bite your fingers off
Bakugou: fucking Deku wonāt do shit! Heās Quirkless!
Flambae: normies are wild kid, push them too hard and they will snap. Look at my own hand!
Robert: flambae Iām keeping this kid
Flambae: and now he will definitely bite your fingers one day if you keep this up
Flambae, holding up his mangled hand: "You see this shit?! A normie bit them off!" [lie] Bakugou, eye wide: "No way!" Robert: "I can confirm. Clean off."
And that is how from that day on Bakugou kept his hands away from izukuās mouth and slowly learn not to beat him up unless itās for training
And maybe somehow Beef gets sent with Robert because he has been registered as an emotional support animal and Robert somehow met Eri and he immediately goes after Overhaul.
Also piling on to Himiko meets and talking to Coupe I vote She letās things about how her quirk and herself is treated and By the end of the vacation Coupe has a beloved vampire like girl for a daughter!
Eri would have been a nearly a baby in that case, since she's 6 at the start of MHA.
SDN is tangled up in an international case involving illegal power supressants - and it leads them to the Shie Hassaikai. It becomes a very messy fight.
Golem is invaluable against Overhaul's Quirk, as he can regenerate himself at will.
A hero is shot with Trigger during the fight - fortunately it was Mecha Man, so he didn't give a shit. His team have to yell at him to get seen by the medic team afterwards.
The source of the power-destroying drug is identified; a little girl with an immense power to "rewind" a person's body, from injuries, to age, to even their powers.
Starblazer shows not fear in holding her as he would his own kin. In his mind, he's got enough years on the old odometer that any accidental rewinding would be beneficial.
Robert welcomes Eri into their odd patchwork family with open arms.
-
As for Himiko Toga; she discovered the pretty ballerina hero Coupe from a news report. The winged dancer slicing through the air and her opponents as graceful as the wind itself. Then with bloodied lips, softly kissed her much-shorter mate with sheer adoration in both of their eyes.
It had been the first time Himiko had seen someone express love in the way that felt natural to her.
The young girl sneaks into the convention for the chance to meet the hero in-person. And she's more than she could ever ask for.
Coupe isn't disgusted or angry with Himiko's questions. The ballerina calmly explains that her shadowy powers give her vampiric urges, and she has long accepted blood to be as important to her as water.
When Himiko asks if Coupe ever drinks the blood of the people she loves, the hero blushes and admits "only with my dearest Colm".
Himiko can barely contain her glee. Someone who understands her love! Not only that, A Hero!
Coupe is clearly intrigued by Himiko's own bloodthirsty instincts, and offers to help train her in future if she ever wishes to follow her craft. Himiko accepts the unofficial apprenticeship happily.
Himiko's parents aren't nearly as understanding.
There is the only one person she can think to call for help.
Coupe arrives on swift wings, documenting the signs of abuse and filing a report with the police. Normally the ballerina would do much worse to people like the Toga parents, but Robert convinced her otherwise. The Toga children find themselves in SDN custody for the time being.
Janelle and Colm vow to make sure Himiko never feels "rotten" for her instincts ever again. They introduce her to other supers with similar powers, explaining her thirst to be as important as nectar to a hummimgbird.
Janelle also teaches her adoptive daughter how to dance. A cygnet to her mother's swan.
Himiko never becomes a villain in this timeline - as she never felt like one again.
Dispatch x My Hero Academia crossovers are hilarious because it immediately shuts down the whole "Can a Quirkless/Powerless person become a hero?" question with a solid "Fuck yeah."
Mecha Man going to public conventions and panels for the first time in forever, at the behest of Mandy, to drum up support for SDN in other regions.
This is where he discovers that the Powered-to-Unpowered ratio in a lot of places is more lopsided. Japan for example; has only a quarter of their population be without powers or mutation - and that's heavily leaning towards the older population.
SDN is asked to send representatives to a special Q&A panel at Musutafu Hero Con. Apparently the event planner believes that showing a more community-focused approach to superheroism will help steer people away from the oversaturated agency market.
Blazer agrees wholeheartedly - offering to send the Z-Team and other SDN employees on a fully-paid trip to Japan while the Torrance branch is being rebuilt.
The Z-Team don't even try fighting the offer - a vacation "just" to speak for a few hours at a convention? Sign them up!
(Depending on how strict air travel is in this universe - the planes are fitted with power-dampeners to prevent... incidents.)
Robert is asked to appear as Mecha Man - as non-powered supers are exceedingly rare in Japan, even in the modern day. Robert agrees, as long as he can bring the Mech Suit + doesn't have to attend the dispatcher's panel.
Robert underestimates how big a deal Mecha Man is in Japan.
When Mecha Man Blue hops on stage at a con and is introduced as THE Quirkless Super Hero!?! The crowd goes nuts. There's a massive crowd of fans wearing Mecha Man merchandise from across different eras, licensed and fan-made. There's older people waving Mecha Man Prime banners, and families dressed as different generations of Mecha Men.
Robert is honestly a little overwhelmed?
When it finally comes to the Q&A portion Mecha Man is asked;
How was he trained? - "Home school and a lot of self-teaching."
Is the Mech Suit the same one as Astral's? - "Not entirely. Since my dad's suit was damaged in an explosion almost a year ago, a fantastic technician helped to design the new suit while using materials from the older model."
Were you born Quirkless, or was your Quirk taken away? - "Still getting used to the Quirk terminology, but I was born without powers of any kind... And I'm pretty sure I never picked one up along the way."
Who is your toughest foe? - "Besides Shroud? I'd say a certain arsonist I now work with." ("You flatter me, Mecha Dick.")
It's the final question, asked by a nervous little boy wearing an All-Might hoodie, that gives the hero pause.
Izuku: "Can I still become a hero? Even if I don't have a Quirk?"
Robert looks at the question asker carefully. The kid has restrained hopeful look as if he's preparing himself for disappointment.
Robert looks over the crowd of fans once more.
Back in the States - Mecha Man was "just" a legacy hero. Grandpa Bobby was the first of his kind, and many more followed.
The people here have yet to have their own Quirkless hero rise up.
Robert: "Yes. But only if you work hard at it. Not having powers will put you a great disadvantage yes, but you're foes will never know what next trick is up your sleeve. I'm at a slightly unfair advantage as the third in the line of Mecha Men - but I know how it feels when you think you're powerless. So yes, you can become a hero without a Quirk." (*awed silence fails over the crowd. the little boy's eyes well with happy tears.*) Robert: "And if anyone says otherwise, I will personally kick their ass."
His closing statement makes the room erupt into laughter and cheers.
The little boy is blubbering thank yous as the mic operator has him step back into the crowd.
Robert spends the rest of the convention signing autographs and meeting people who've always admired Mecha Man - in any form.
It's the kids that really get him though.
The little boy with the All-Might hoodie will later ask Mecha Man to sign so many posters and toys (Robert didnt even know they made plushies), and introduce himself as Izuku Midoriya aka Deku.
Robert: "Deku? Oh! Like the cool shrub guys from Legend of Zelda! I'll make sure to keep an ear out if I ever hear that name on the airwaves!"
The boy faints from joy, much to Robert's surprise.
Mecha Man isn't the only hero with his own fanclub.
Sonar and Golem are nearly mobbed by people with obvious mutations and hybrid traits. A little boy with a covered face and membraned arms tells Sonar that he's his hero. Sonar is so proud that he turns Megabat.
A boy with a rocky face asks Golem in a whisper if he likes animals. Golem smiles wide and tells him of the time he babysat a tiger.
Malevola is taking a selfie with a little girl with pink skin and horns. A girl crowned with thorns asks her religious questions, and is puzzled when the demoness says she's Atheist.
Coupe is showing a pair of children (one physical, the other confined to shadows) how her wings work. A little girl with sharp teeth and a wild expression asks her if she needs blood to fuel her power - Coupe answers calmly "Infrequently. Mostly I enjoy the taste."
Punch Up is showing off his strength to a number of people born with height deformities.
Flambae nearly gets in trouble for telling an explosive child to "Don't talk about people like that, you little shit!" - after the kid said a derogatory term for Quirkless people.
Waterboy meets a froggy little girl that compliments his wetsuit. And a swarm of children with life-altering Quirks say he inspired them to become a heroes. He's so flustered that he can barely speak.
Prism records a mini music video with the daughter of musicians. She tells her that they can collaborate whenever she wants. A little blonde boy shows off his Prism-inspired hero outfit, with her approval.
Invisigal nearly collides with her first super-fan - a little girl who's body turned permanently invisible when she was very young, and wishes she could control it like her. Visi wheezes with pride.
Many of Phenomaman's fans are people who feel "alien" in some way, not just physically.
Overrall, it's a very eye-opening experience.
You have no idea how much this means to me agakfjaifahhs
This is what mean when I say I want more MHA x Dispatch crossovers.
Where Midoriya gets to heal knowing someone without a quirk actually *made it* as a hero despite the hardship and disadvantage and hearing someone say with conviction that quirkless people can become heroes if they have enough determination(and we all know Midoriya does).
Where Robert gets to see the positive influence and hope the image of Mecha Man provides here, especially for those who are quirkless and fighting against quirkless discrimination.
Where the public gets to hear about Robert's experience as a quirkless hero and how he trained for it but still had to self-teach himself a lot of the skills he has today that has allowed him to be Mecha Man
Where those with less convenient or conventional quirks can see that there are people like them that ended up becoming well-known heroes and have persevered through any discrimination.
Where the Z-Team can see just how much hope they give to others and that they have people cheering them on, people who, without a doubt, see them as heroes.
So yeah, I love this AU concept. I've only read 2 MHA x Dispatch fics so far that have properly touched on this kind of thing but even they haven't really gotten too much into it, so I'd love to see more fics address the influence heroes like Mecha Man and the Z-Team would have in the MHA universe.
somebody save him (also can you guys rec some cool flambert/mechabae fics? Imma have some free time this weekend to binge-read Feel free to rec your own fics too)
What I was thinking Grandma Su Jin would look like
Robert waking up
Considering fic idea where Robert starts working at SDN, but he has an almost-newborn baby in a lil sling when he signs on.
But I'm not sure what I love more;
Sam: Literal phoenix baby that hatched from an egg Robert found - gets mistaken for Flambert love child.
Abby: Mad science test tube attempt at making a Ditto-style superweapon that imprinted on Robert, and now looks like a Mini-Bob - can copy 1/10 of a persons powers.
Both?
Baby Abby, cause child who can copy powers in a superhero office? And isn't old enough to be reasoned with and/or bribed?
One second the baby is on fire, the next they are breaking all the windows screaming. Turn around for a second and oops the baby can now fly and is floating towards the window.
No one in that office is safe from a Abby induced heart-attack.
Robert; King of the Normies, with a baby that seemingly has all the powers!?
Baby goes invisible, baby spews water all over co-worker, baby turns into bat, baby reverts to original Ditto form and slings mud.
Abigail Robertson is her father's pride and joy, but by god she's also giving him grey hairs.
Could the secret rainbow baby au fit into this?
Oof.
Robert having these lil "almost babies" in the form of a lil semi-stable shapeshifting blob, a phoenix egg, and his own unborn child.
Then the explosion happens, and Robert loses the pregnancy.
Abby doesn't understand why her Daddy is crying, but she tries her best to stay solid enough to give him a hug. That's the day Abby permanently transforms into a mini-Robertson.
Robert cries when he sees his adoptive daughter's new form. Those big familiar brown eyes and messy auburn hair a keepsake of what her sibling may have looked like.
He cries even harder when the Phoenix egg finally hatches, and instead of a wild bird, he finds a mostly-human baby wailing back at him.
It's all so overwhelming. It's fate pulling a cruel joke - taking away his biological child but returning twice fold with ones he took in with kindness.
It helps him recover from the hospital in many ways, but stunt him in others.
His body seems to still be convinced it's pregnant somehow - a physical relic triggered by the presence of an energetic toddler, and a downy newborn. Robert nurses the pair when his chest begins to leak - the act soothing a wound in his heart. (Plus its cheaper than expensive lactose-free formula)
He still vows to take his revenge on the man that took one of his children away.
-
Blonde Blazer is surprised, but very understanding when Mecha Man tells her that he wants to prioritise his children over rebuilding the mech suit. The explosion was a bit of a wake-up call - he needs to be more cautious for the sake of those waiting for him at home.
He leaves out a certain medical detail for now.
The role of dispatcher would suit him for the foreseeable... if he can find a way to juggle two small babies and an office job. The Torrance branch has a small daycare facility on site, but Robert is nervous to let his pair out of his sight for the moment.
Robert shows up to SDN Torrance in a civilian's attire - Abby and Sam on his back and chest in a tandem baby carrier. He wields the diaper bag like a battering ram.
First day goes smoothly enough. The Z-Team are rude and disrespectful, but they (mostly) follow their new dispatcher's orders. They also hastily try to cover up their foul language when they become aware of a tiny pair of ears listening in.
The real shock to Robert's system is when a good number of the Z-Team decide to meet him in the breakroom after his first shift. Seems they wanted to see their bonus juinor dispatcher.
Sonar, ears twitching: "Oh shit! THREE pups!?" Robert, chuckling: "No, just the ones on me." Sonar, confused: "What about that one?" (*points at Robert's lower abdomen*) Robert: ??? Mal, winces: "Ohhh, babes. You didn't know?" Robert, nervous: "Know what?" Z-Team: (*all make cringed, knowing expressions*) Prism, leans in whispering: "Sweetie, you should go to medical and take a pee test." Robert, stunned: "But I-! I'm not-" Prism, gently urging him: "I know it's a shock. Having two little-uns already. You can decide what you want to do later."
Upon seeing his adoptive brother's lost expression - Chase barks at the Z-Team, demanding to know what they did. Prism whispers that there might be "another passenger on board", and Chase just clams up and quickly follows after a numb Robert to medical.
A quick ultrasound confirms Sonar and Mal's senses.
It's a baby. Hiding behind Robert's ribs like the sun behind clouds. Robert and Chase can't believe it.
Calls are quickly made to the hospital to exchange information.
One quick OBGYN appointment later, and Robert has the answer.
His lost child was a twin. One that was destined to pass to make way for it's stronger but shy sibling.
Robert was still pregnant.
Robert also has two babies below the age of two.
He's freaking out a little, but can't stop crying and laughing.
Bouncing Abby on his knee, and Sam against his chest, he asks his pair if they're okay becoming big siblings. Abby babbles excitedly despite not understanding her Daddy's joyful words. Sam grunts, uninterested in anything other than milk and cuddles. Robert kisses them with thick tears streaming down his face. Chase hugs his little bro tight, meeting his hysterical joy with his own cautious one.
(Hiding behind doorways, Invisigal's face blanches. She hadn't known Mecha Man was pregnant when she planted the bomb, let alone that he'd lost one of the babies in the aftermath. She feels like throwing up.)
Ok but can you see the z-teamās reaction to this news? Like itās not that Robert didnāt want to be pregnant it was that he just lost a baby and was shock! Gods they are going to protect this man so so hard him and his two other babies
Sonar texts Robert an apology after the fumbled breakroom meeting. The look on the twunk DILF's face when he mentioned hearing the extra heartbeat in his lower stomach was indescribable - something between shock and nausea. Prism thankfully had enough awareness to help steer Robert towards medical.
The rest of the Z-Team tossed around the theory that their new dispatcher was just very unlucky with birth control - the two under-two-year-olds strapped to him was enough evidence of such.
Flambae even darkly suggested it may be a controlling spouse that didn't let Robert take birth control - he'd heard enough horror stories from his female relatives for it to not be impossible.
Punch Up had given the lighter idea that Robert had simply mistimed his cycle cus of the more recent baby. ("Thats how one of my brothers got made!")
Visi slinked off at some point, which was weird, but they figured that she was just being nosy.
Prism comes back, her expression like she'd just seen a heartwarming news story.
Malevola: "Any updates?" Prism: "Daddy Dispatcher a-okay, just shocked. He didn't know he was having another baby, but he's happy about it." Prism: "Nah, you good. He said to thank Batboy btws. He thought it was just hormonal shit from his other babies." Sonar, whistle of relief: "Whew! Guess I didn't screw up too much, huh?" (*Sonar's phone pings!*) Sonar: "Oh wait, thats him." Robert, texting: "I'm sorry I froze up. I had a medical emergency recently and I had No Idea. You can't imagine how grateful I am that you noticed and told me." Sonar, aloud: "Would it be distasteful to ask for pics?" Flambae: "Depends on what kind." Sonar, typing: "No probs. Should have said it privately though. Docs give you much info on ninja baby?" Robert: "Docs say that they're the size of a grapefruit and healthy all things considered. Abby and Sam seem happy enough with the new development." Robert: (*sends sonogram of a tiny mass hiding behind his ribs*) Z Team: (*goes nuts!!*) :O!
Everyone scrambles to the Team group-chat to spam Robert with congratulations and well-wishes.
Robert is a lil overwhelmed, and thanks them in turn - wishing them a good second shift on Monday.
Robert feels that he jinxed it when Blazer informs him of her plan to "shake things up" by cutting a member of the Z-Team.
Sabotage ensues, obviously.
Robert is so furious, he barely gives the Z-Team time to sit down before laying into them and Blazer. Chase goes to organise the downstairs daycare for Sam and Abby.
Then Golem bumps Robert with the door, sending him to the ground against a pile of chairs.
The room goes silent with shock. Golem moves to lift Robert off the floor, his apology genuine.
Then Robert starts crying.
Not just "I'm pregnant so I'm hormonal"-crying, but full "I'm fucking terrified right now"-crying where he can barely breathe. Blazer helps him arise, confusion and worry plastering her face.
Chase walks in during all of this, and starts to tear the Z-Team a new asshole for making his little bro cry. Beef even starts growling at the offenders.
Malevola senses Robert's worry, and quickly scans his belly for the extra life force settled there. Sonar in turn does a screech, giving a thumbs up to the echo.
Sonar: "Ninja baby still going strong! Pissed off, though." Malevola: "It's fine, babes. The bubba is a little startled, but okay." Robert, still crying: "Sorry I'm-! I already lost one, I just can't-!" Z-Team: (*faces pale at the same time*) Blonde Blazer: "Lost? Robert, do you mean...?" (*flickers eyes towards his stomach*) "Oh! Oh gosh I didn't even know you were-! " Robert: "I didn't either until Sonar told me he heard the heartbeat. I didn't know a twin survived." Sonar: (*ears droop sympathetically*) Z-Team: (*share silent looks that hint towards later conversations*) Flambae: "Golem, you better be his bitch for the foreseeable future, okay?" Golem: "I'm cool with that." Robert: (*starts hitting Golem with a chair multiple times, still crying*) Visi: (*slowly fades into view, looking positively ill with guilt*)
Robert still gives them a speech.
The Phoenix Program is for people who want to rebuild themselves from the ashes of who they once were - not catty vote-off-the-island score boarding. The Z-Team weren't helping their cases by tripping each other up, but Blazer was in the wrong for creating an ultimatum.
Blazer is embarrassed/shocked into rescinding her decision before the Z-Team themselves. There will be no cuts, but the committee is still demanding better results from the Z-Team. They'll need to step up their game if they want to keep the Phoenix Program alive. She wishes them all a better second shift, and whispers to Robert about organising him parental leave in the future.
The Z-Team learn to respect and fear Robert Robertson after that day - even if he's a tiny pregnant man with two babies and a fat dog in tow.
They made me watch the tadc finale this is all i got to show for it
Hey pookie, if i draw you those troll creatures would you consider drawing me some spicynoodles... /genq nf
AND I SAID SAY LESS
I've been seeing a lot of pregnant CoupƩ fics, which I really love! Like, yes, help her move on from her childhood trauma by giving her kid the childhood she never had (same with Robert lol), but how about that + Z-Team polycule?
She thought Punch Up was bad enough with his pampering, then she realizes just how wrong she was when they tell the rest of the team. EVERYONE gangs up to give her the best experience possible, lol.
ok first time sending in an ask. iām shaking in my boots. but your last comic was so adorable i canāt stop thinking about it. now my mind has supplied the image of harper in a suit with a little briefcase and it wonāt leave me alone.
insert harper and victor going to a vanderstenk business meeting together. she whips out a pack of crayons from her briefcase and starts drawing graphs and chirping intelligible nonsense. #daddydaughtertime!!
KILLER pfp omfg, will sketch rlly soon Also, bro you are leagues ahead of me
I didnāt send in my first ask till like a week ago, I am terrified still š
You are SO right btw, briefcase absolutely.
itās probably designer, knowing sonar
Vic likes to joke Harper has a say in the lay off process. āShe has a good instinct on whoās a good or bad employeeā (she caught a guy being rude to a secretary [she could hear his tone even if she didnāt really know the words] and chirped loudly, alerting sonar, baby stands on business)
when sonar hands over the notice of termination thereās a āsignatureā in crayon next to his
I think sonar would work at a law firm that handles economic and monetary crimes whenever he isnāt taking shifts at sdn. he works his way to a high rank position quickly, (heās quite good at his job when he wants to be, and getting Harper and Robert lots of stuff is a great incentive) so he can bring Harper along whenever.
This concept is one of my favorites ššāāļø THX FOR THE ASK!!!!!
Harper by @eiiegeia!!! š
Tumblr is just group therapy. We are all in group therapy with each other.
everybody go in a circle now, say your name and tell us what animal you would ride if you were the size of a peanut (<- actual ice breaker question I once received in group counseling)
Sugar glider. His name would be Marvin and we would be best friends forever
I would ride a ferret. It would be black. So I can sneak through the dark undetected hehehe.
I want to see if we can turn this into a tag game...
@caravalxjurdan240 @artemisiamasterofnone @itzursafespace @causalshapeshifter @bardorsomethinglikethat @violetthediva @er-idkhehe2 @obsess-over-ink-on-dead-trees @wrensvoices @twinklefwinkle @wordslikepoisonn @imjusthereforthecake @sassychicsings @jacksfoxevangeline @lunaticcat28 @crane-mythos @booklover5111 + everyone else I forgot :]
flying squirrel, ive always thought they were amazing :>>
@thedogbard @makeitfast9052 @autisimyfoxerronii @erosdaughterwritingfiction @imjusthereforthecake + open tags
Bumblebee bat >:3
@lightsabersandbluecookies @dog-boy-toska @irrelevantsarcasmghost @spark-the-angel-dragon open tags
a duckling :333
:3
@ajolteonnamedsparky @th3deadmanwalking @in-the-forge @sixfootraven @mycelial-whispering-court @icarus-the-dragon @leafwing-life + open tags :3
Uhhhhh Kingfisher or Starling! :D
Idk who to tag sooo
Whoever sees this: pretend I tagged YOU! >:3
Baby emperor penguin :3
Tagging: @anabetel35 @stormtrooperc0l3 @yoursocialchameleon @deethejester @tiethesocialyakward @sw33tlemon-poists @solarc0r3 @schizzz @icarus-the-dragon @thing7577 @chillinee @itzstealthylesgooo
āØTYSM FOR TAGGING ME ZEE!!!āØ
A Luna Moth!!!
@crispysongkid @i-am-xp-64 @thatguywin @lemonandtheart @sleepdeprivedsimp234 @mr-immature @severaleyesofcreator @julianightmare @0138-e @ladyspade101 @lip-someone @nostalgicmermaaiid @stormtrooperc0l3 @niixienootoo @notanothermagnusarchivesfan @tiethesocialyakward @papileoanddaddydonnie @aceofspades-washere @sweetest-starlight @sw33tlemon-poists @sweetestlittledarling @enigmasalad @emeraldhazeart @dispatch-lover @misslunarblue @mikasaackerman728 @miss-honeysucklettes @mistyghostzzz @mags-moment @clowdii @art-pogona @artvitograce @mysticsandmagic05 @glassismadeofme @ghoulish-trashcan @mainlly-sam @marsmarztian @somebodystreadmill @skapocolypse @applinsfan @crowl-cake @joydoesathing @sammibeari @nervousgladiator24 @solis-knight @lyndexv @caffeinated-crownguard @cookiesart @faetoasty @faejayy
Thx for the tag!! I'd ride this guy
@prettiest-boy-in-town @brokendarkfairyempressforever @wannabecinderella @the-silent-screamer @shortnsweetemailsicantsend @leonshortforleo @vibrantly-yours @certified-loser-boy @ihavenoconsistentinterests @byleriskillingme @scoopstroopog @going-crazy-together @fist-full-of-feathers @poet-queen12 @mikeandwillsweddingofficiant @thecatboyknight-offical
Ć it's been ages since I've participated in a tag game! Thank you :D
I'd ride a quokka!!
I'll tag @kennystrator @the-herro @cooldudetheman
and also @bloopiebloops @randomspider10 @peanut-lovers-world @archivedangst @junoisabug @idrawjohnegbert @poppbubble @mellifluouzzz :3
omg iāve never done one of these before!!
I would have a giant African snail and we would ride off into the sunset.
@enigmasalad @giddy-up-frankie @ambleramvle @invisobill-enthusiast @scrimblyscroomblo @tremendous-amount-of-ships
I haven't done one of these either! I'm going with a capybara named Timothy.
@m00nlight3r @holycometinsignia @flamgayagenda @emmasmoke8 @silver-psychopath
I've always loved fox's so I would enjoy riding on one
@ipainkiller1999 @kaynephele @mothnem @yumemiruseiun @birthofcassiopeia @glowinggemma28-fangirl
Just decided to @ random mutuals
I would love to ride on a Stygian Owl. Look at that magestic cryptid <3 @lokomotives @laustuff @i-used-to-wear-the-fedora
good morning everyone Iām back at my bs
sonar are you stupid
chase is about to violate his oath to do no harm as a hero
my favorite stills under cutāØ
my pencil slipped
hey guys how we feeling
when your granddaughter reminds you of your son who reminds you of your dead wife who you blame yourself for the death of so you teach hard lessons now so they can prevent deaths like that in future, but you also go about teaching it in the worst way possible.
(Harper by @eiiegeia š this au, however, is my fault)
Jabbiwi annoying an already annoyed Zankiwi