baby, you should go and love yourself.

my mama don't like you & she likes everyone. & i never like to admit that i was wrong. & i've been so caught up in my job, didn't see what's going on but now i know i'm better sleeping on my own. semi-selective written by paige

[ircny]

––––– @selaphicl !¡

             when his voice raised, marleny shook slightly out of habit. sure, she had screamed at him, but she hadn’t expected for him to get loud with her. the brunette watched as he took off his coat in an ALMOST cartoon-ish manner, watching as the fabric fell to the floor. his words were almost like knives piercing her skin as he spoke to her, tugging her lower lip between her teeth as she glanced down at the floor, feeling the tears that collected in her eyes spill over. ‘ please leave. ’ she spoke, shoving her hands against his chest to get him away from her. ‘ you –… you can’t just put all the blame on me like everything is always my fault. all i ever wanted to do was be good enough for once in my fucking life and i can’t even do that because i’m such a screw up !! maybe my mother was right; i should have finished what i started. ’

         ‘ don’t spout bullshit at me, ’ he insists, voice still holding steadily at its previous volume. though it’s so loud he’s SURE the neighbors can hear his every word, the subtle way that marleny quakes takes something away from his voice, leaving him sounding marginally less menacing than he had a few seconds ago –––– though still LOUD. ‘ you can be ‘good enough’ ! just not with me –––– ’ tane doesn’t know how to say that he doesn’t have enough time to make her feel good enough while he tries so monumentally hard to stop himself from feeling like he’s TOO ‘good enough’ –––– at least, he doesn’t know how to say it without saying JUST THAT. ‘ LOOK ––– i don’t know what this whole mom business is about, but you’re not a screw up. ’ he shrugs, voice lowering back to its usual decible. ‘ you’ve probably heard this before, but SCREWING UP doesn’t always make you a screw up. ’

[lena-kara]

[limsjaebeom]

[lowliifes]

the blood in my veins is made up of mistakes let’s forget who we are and dive into the dark.

[ircny]

––––– ❛ snapchat » 💯💯.

[ircny]

–––––– @endearinglydumb !¡

CLARA: i mean im not gonna, but only cuz i’d be forbidden from dating forever CLARA: besides, you’re harmless, it wasn’t even meant for me, riiiii? CLARA: lol, i’d actually love to see that CLARA: but you get if he even sees your name on my phone, it’s a beef ting

ARI: yeah that’d be shit ARI: maybe all these snaps are accidents ARI: how’s he supposed to know they’re not

[ircny]

i just posted like ........... 10 drafts and i’m sorry for that but also i feel free so 

[ircny]

–––––– @ofyouths !¡

         SHE SWORE SHE was already biting the insides of her cheek to keep herself from laughing – this guy was NOT helping his reputation at all. “ i don’t mean to brag —- ” who was she KIDDING? she more or less wanted him to COLLAPSE from nervousness, just because she can be a little intimidating. “ —- but i’ve been on some of the lead roles in the school’s plays for the past year. then again, not EVERYONE cares about the theatre geeks, so… ” freya lets her voice trail off, as she plays with the ends of her hair as she looked down and rocked back and forth on her heels slightly. she hears his reply and looks up to him, more or less knowing that he had attempted to change the topic. giving him a CONFUSED look, she says, “ o-oh, um, thank you. first time i’ve ever heard someone compliment my name. ”

          ARI SPOTS HIS IN as soon as she stumbles across her words, a smile breaking across his features like an explosion. he skips over her answer to his first question ––– but that doesn’t change the feeling of all-out fear that blooms in his stomach at her accomplishments. in all honesty –––– ari isn’t surprised that he doesn’t know who she is. being on the football team was like being tall and never deigning to look down. you ran into the shorter people, but you never REALLY saw their faces. ‘ it’s REALLY pretty, ’ he continues, taking the one little bit of grip he has and running with it. FAST. ‘ it’s SCANDINAVIAN, right ? ’ he pulls the tidbit of information out of the back of his mind at the last second, a two second bit of a discovery channel documentary on norse mythology that he’d watched last hanukkah when he was MORE than totally baked.

[ircny]

–––––– @optacity !¡

jamie rolled her eyes at him before she had decided to sit next to him on the bed — sighing quietly as she had looked at him, ‘ alright alright ! i know how much i HATE you right now but —- i guess i could help you get rid of that horrible hangover you have. ’

        all at once, tane perks up –––– but he’s not about to let her know that. ‘ i’m listening, ’ he mumbles in his rough hangover voice, tone flat but indicating that he’s interested in whatever remedy she has to offer.

[ircny]

–––––– @talkmedcwns !¡

❛ if the intent was for me, i would have grabbed something useful like a new tube    of lipstick instead of this hoodie – navy isn’t even my colour. you sound like a dad. ❜

        ‘ –––––––– whatever. your shit doesn’t make any fucking sense. ‘navy isn’t my colour.’ like FUCK. ’

[ircny]

–––––– @blutend !¡

      ‘ fine. FINE, i get it. lay off with the sarcasm, will you?? besides. i still have to say yes so you better be nice to me. ’

         ‘ don’t be so sensitive, then. if you weren’t so sensitive, you’d laugh at my medieval anecdotes. you might even appreciate the fact that i made you a knight good enough to have a squire when i just as easily could have made you a peasant ––––– THAT’S ALL I’M SAYING. ’

[ircny]

––––– ❛ ims » 🍒.

MARIANA: oh that's hot, now i'm gonna think of gummy worms when i suck you off. you're an idiot

MARIANA: do ya? i like it when you hold my head down

TANE: you won't though because it's not gonna fall out your mouth like one

TANE: really

TANE: i like that too

[ircny]

–––––– @selaphicl !¡

         ‘ i thought you were different !! ’ she screamed, brushing a hand over her face. ‘ i thought – i thought for ONCE i wouldn’t have to give a hundred percent for someone to spend time with me or even just watch a half hour show with me. i didn’t think i’d be getting stood up on dates, or being skipped out on, or getting my goddamn heart broken at every turn. ’ letting out a frustrated sigh through her nose, she blinked a few times as she shut the cabinet she was putting things away in – she WASN’T going to let him see her cry. ‘ i didn’t want to be like that girl, and i’m not like that. i’m just sick of everyone treating me like a damn welcome mat. ’

           annoyance bubbles out of tane like lava out of an elementary school student’s science fair volcano ––––– fast and short-lived. ‘ WELL, I’M NOT ! ’ his voice is raised –– louder than he means it to be. ‘ you wanna watch a fucking half hour show ? fine, let’s watch the fucking show, ’ he rips off his jacket, throwing it on the ground in an over-exaggerated and childish movement. ‘ you don’t want me to treat you like a welcome mat ? ’ he asks, striding over to where she stands in milliseconds, his brown eyes searching for a chance to pin her own. ‘ don’t fucking ACT like a welcome mat. ’ he shakes his head ––– does he really place all the blame on her ? probably not. but he’d rather tell her he does than acknowledge the fact that marleny’s unhappiness is his fault ––––– that ANYTHING is his fault.

[ircny]

–––––– @tiredsomes !¡

            ‘ could have been ? why can’t it STILL be so ? things can’t be THAT BAD, tane. ’

          ‘ it just CAN’T, okay !? i have stuff going on ––– other people. my shit isn’t all ANDROMEDA all the time. ’

[ircny]

–––––– @tiredsomes !¡

            ‘ what makes you so sure of that ? ’

         ‘ because i always have ! ––––– i always have. ’

[ircny]

–––––– @thekncwing !¡

              “where did you get that from me asking you were you serious? i know my moral compass isn’t anywhere near clean but that DOESN’T excuse the fact that you lied to me. nothing about me is straight edge and we both know it, but one thing i don’t do is lie, especially about simple shit like this, tal. – don’t try and flip this on me anyways, we’re discussing you.”

         ‘ everyone LIES, ivy ––– everyone. even you, with your holier than thou ‘i don’t lie’ bit. oh, we’re DISCUSSING me ? what is this, intro to introspection 101 ? i told you a white lie. ONE WHITE LIE. you’re the one who blew it up into something massive. this is on you. ’

[ircny]

–––––– @nepthunno !¡

    ‘ because if you’re going away there’s no possibility for me to ask you to be my girlfriend, you dummie.’

          ‘ –––––––––– what ? ’

[ircny]

––––– ❛ snapchat » 💯💯.

[ircny]

–––––– @endearinglydumb !¡

clara: stopped doing that age 10 when i realized boys only talk about dumb stuff clara: lol sure, and that^ wasn’t about u clara: wow. you’re so lucky corey’s not home.

ARI: u know what ....... tru ARI: oh i’m so lucky corey’s not home? ARI: are you gonna show him or smth? ARI: bc i’m pretty sure i could deck him in 3 seconds

[ircny]

–––––– @ofyouths !¡

           HE WASN’T EVEN thinking anymore when he looks through her eyes. andrei was still LOST in a trance in the memory of her, and only seeing her through his DREAMS and ILLUSIONS only made it worse. he wanted another bottle, but his body seemed to be giving out. at the sound of her voice, his ears perk up — he was going home. “ you moved out this morning, ” he slurs as if he was stating a scientific fact. “ we — i, i live three blocks straight ahead. tiny blue house. hard to miss. ” the DELIRIOUS state he was in was getting worse — he needed to be taken care of. once the other more or less understood his words in a slow, CATATONIC tone, he once again attempts to stand up gripping on whatever he could for dear life. the room wasn’t spinning around at that angle, and he actually felt relieved, given that he still had the ability to FEEL at all.

          ANXIETY RISES UP the back of emily’s throat slowly ––– she scrambles to her feet, standing directly above andrei in his slumped position on the ground. ‘ okay, ’ she begins, voice wavering ––– speaking more to herself than to him. every word she’s uttered to him has come back to haunt her in the form of his memories of this EX-GIRLFRIEND, prodding at the side of emily that holds her excess of emotions. from this angle, he looks almost ANGELIC ––– if ANGELIC meant drunk and groggy with a halo of blonde hair on his head. ‘ we have to get you up, ’ she starts, understanding just how IMPOSSIBLE that’s going to be. she crouches back down, peering at him with green eyes, gauging just how blitzed he is ––––– and how hard it’s going to be to get him up. ‘ andrei ? ’ she wonders if telling him her name is a good or bad idea. at this point, she isn’t sure EMILY can get him home in one piece. maybe he’ll only cooperate with the girlfriend she’s assumed the place of –––– maybe he only wants to see the girl he seems to miss so much.