Locked In Briarcliff

Rose Tint My World, Keeps Me Safe From My Trouble And Pain

[itherstanprincess]

I wish I was joking. My friends literally make me want to kill myself.

[itherstanprincess]

My friends make me want to kill myself

[nyeyeschicagothighs-deactivated]

a man and his (adorable) pupper (x)

[kngshxt-deactivated20180831]

[littleturtleduck]

[itherstanprincess]

I'm pretty ready to kill myself, if I'm being completely honest.

No, I don't want attention. I don't want help. I don't want to be told it's OK. Because it's not. I just wanted to write it out and look at it.

I've been a terrible human. And I've tried so fucking hard to change. Because I saw a life worth that, and people worth that.

And... I thought I had a grip on things... I was fighting. I saw some things in my life that shaped me in the ways I was shaped... And I fought even harder to overcome it.

I thought I'd made a break through. I thought I had friends. Not many. But a very small few I could absolutely trust. And I did everything to be the best friend I possibly could. And I'd fail sometimes and mess everything up, but I've learned to admit when I'm wrong and apologize and... I'd give them the world.

And I see now... That I was a convenience. I always have been. I don't think I've ever had a sincere friend. I think I've always just been a convenient fill in, a last resort. I've never been included in friend plans... Never been a best friend to anyone... Never more than a joke.

I thought by being supportive and offering people my best and the world meant I could get a little human decency back. That when I needed to fall down and be vulnerable... When I needed support... That I could get it.

It's taken my whole life to set that kind of standard for myself because of my experiences growing up, and how I've been treated by my biological and adopted family.

I've called off helping people that can't prove that they are there for me, which is a surprising number on both sides... Or maybe it's not actually surprising.

And I'm sitting here in bed thinking... Damn, life really can't be fucking worth this bullshit. I feel so isolated... And I reflect on my dreams, goals, and wants... And all I can see is how absolutely out of reach they are. And that tops off the out full of despair.

I'm alone.

Everything I want, I cannot achieve.

My dreams are futile.

I'm lost.

And I'm out of reasons not to end it.

I'll probably pussy out. I always fucking do. Something always go wrong. But right now... It is fully my intention to not be around this time tomorrow.

So so long, and good night.

[lil-jemmyy-blog]

Eliza: i knew you’d fight until the war was won

Hamilton: war’s not done

Eliza: but you deserve a chance to meet your son

Hamilton: *points at eliza’s belly*

SON’S NOT DONE

[zgmfd]

[sizvideos]

Hamilton’s Leslie Odom Jr. talks diversity on Broadway - Watch the full video

[bigblondelicious]

MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM I LOVE HIM

[gayfeatherfiend]

There’s a lot of people who exist in the world.

A lot of stories to tell.

[heathens-and-kings]

I don’t know who that is next to him, but being a good white ally is nodding and pointing vigorously while you allow a person of color to make an argument without interrupting them. Also BLESS Leslie Odom Jr. forever.

[grangerhermiones]

@quidditchleaguenet​​ january challenge | characters who died in the wizarding wars

[grangerhermiones]

@quidditchleaguenet​​ january challenge | characters who died in the wizarding wars

[itherstanprincess]

Dig dig dig

[itherstanprincess]

Horsey hijinks.

[itherstanprincess]

OK, last set of photos

[itherstanprincess]

No, I'm not done.

[itherstanprincess]

[itherstanprincess]

[itherstanprincess]

Apparently we play with weeds.