Just a little guy

He/Him

[icantspellthings]

Top 3 things people love insisting they don't have despite it being impossible

Pronouns

An accent

Bias

[uncertainlys]

MY FINGERS BARELY EVEN TOUCHED YOUR STUPID FUCKING AD STOP REDIRECTING ME TO THE APP STORE

[loveridden1999]

the thing about phone in bed is that it's so awesome. almost makes you feel like betraying & destroying yourself for nothing isn't all so bad

[redstonedust]

well, no, i didn’t expect leopards to eat my face, but this obviously wasn’t what the leopards eating people's face party wanted. they were stifled by their opposition and bureaucratic red tape! i think we should give more power to the leopard eating face party, so the leopards only eat the faces of people who deserve it. plus they just put a new leopard in charge of the face eating, and i think this one really brings something new to the table. so yes i'm voting for the leopards eating people's face party again. why wouldn't i.

[antoniabishop]

make a wish

[goatedgreen]

i hate that when you try and look up shit for writing purposes it starts linking suicide hotlines and addiction advice articles like bro i just wanna know the information im not killing myself i promise. now tell me what i wanna know

[wingkink]

btw it's so fucking stupid you can be anxious physically in your body even after you've decided mentally you don't care. I'm supposed to be in charge here

[theconcealedweapon]

[maarvarq]

Always bear in mind that there is absolutely no legitimate evidence that Luigi was actually the one who killed the insurance company guy.

[theconcealedweapon]

Of course he wasn't. He was at a party with me that day.

[tiny-space-whale]

No but like literally, actually. All bits aside.

He didn't do it.

The cops very clearly planted evidence on him because they had to make an arrest because all eyes were on them and whoever actually did the deed was making them look stupid.

Why would the real killer hero have kept the weapon on his person and traveled two states over while carrying it and a manifesto in his bag, conveniently turning the crime into a federal matter? The same guy whose bag they found in a park, filled with monopoly money? Why did the police turn off their bodycams, take Luigi's stuff, drive a block away, turn their bodycams back on, go back into the restaurant, and then arrest him?

From the moment of his arrest, even left-of-center media has been presuming his guilt without examining anything (e.g. calling him "the killer" instead of "alleged" or "accused") and then when I say he didn't do it, the nearest person chimes in with some quip that tells me they think he did do it but should go free anyway. Don't get me wrong, I would have the same attitude if he had done it. But he didn't. It makes me feel like the only sane person in the world, even among my staunchly leftist friends.

[danielkanhai]

i hate when apps know that i’m screenshotting something. when i screenshot something, that’s me acting outside your realm of understanding, app. i am beyond what you consider the observable universe. you’re not supposed to perceive me. we don’t know when god screenshots the earth. we don’t know when he’s like, “okay i’m just gonna take a pic in case i ever want to add dinosaurs back to something later and don’t remember how.” and if we did, we wouldn’t act all smug about it like, “hey, you wanna share that post? you could just click here to share it.” no, man. you didn’t catch me. i screenshotted this for my own reasons. what’s next? i can’t take a photo of my computer screen with my phone out of laziness without being shamed by the printer i don’t own?

[aroacesafeplaceforall]

“My heart skips a beat when I see you” heart defect get that checked

[plumslices]

There’s no such thing as an inanimate object everything is sentient

[s9sh9]

[local-lesbian-tree-demon]

they should invent a body that feels normal to be inside of

[mousidy]

the state does not need to assign you a sex, nor does it need to keep inalterable record of it btw

[mousidy]

a very interesting terf objection to this one boils down to "but how would the state know who to protect?" because it speaks to the incredible privilege of being in a class the state actually ever remotely wants to protect. most oppressed groups do not want the state to have a registry of them, lol

[mousidy]

the patriarchy has done a great job convincing white cisgender women that it's in their best interests to maintain it

[mousidy]

[creature-adjacent]

Carnivorous plants doin this is so funny to me

They don't wanna eat their pollinators :(

[questionablepastries]

[npdsafe]

Things that don’t make you a bad person:

Displaying “scary” symptoms of mental illness

Being diagnosed with multiple disorders

Having one or various personality disorders

Being diagnosed with NPD, BPD, or ASPD

Having very low empathy, or no empathy

Having symptoms that cause anger, emptiness, or paranoia

Having triggers or “strange” personal boundaries

Needing extra help or accommodations

Having intrusive thoughts about upsetting or scary topics

[figtional]

love is everywhere

[diserbillyti]

Honestly man I kind of love telling able people I used to be a support worker. The response is always ableist but sometimes it's in a surreal and fascinating way.

Once I had someone do the whole "that seems so hard, you must be so patient" standard routine. I ask her, "why's that?" You know, why do I need to be some kind of virtuous martyr to watch 90s cartoons with other disabled people for $30 an hour?

And she says to me, with full seriousness and a look of utter dread on her face,

"All the biting."

OK mate. What do you mean. What biting. What are you on about.

"The biting," she repeats, as if it's obvious and I ought to intuitively know what she means. Then she kind of snaps her teeth to demonstrate. "You know?"

No I don't know. What do you mean biting.

"They bite," she says. Eyes wide, dead serious. "The, um, the Slow People. They bite."

Melany, I says to her I says, they're not damn draculas.