//I can scream i can howl i can claw but i can never go back/I've blood underneath my nails and my smile will always be crooked/ there is no yesterday only deception and tomorrow is yet another promise broken/ ive residual disappointment stuck Between my teeth from the time my mother failed as a daughter (her mother was a monster, she tries to be gentle with her bites)/ there is a certain weight in loneliness and longing, a certain weight which pulverizes my collar bones/ im nothing but gunpowder and moondust waiting ignition, spontaneous combustion/ im a hoarder, piles in my living room of hopeless pathetic promises you made/ garbage rot and decay i need to be a flower mother/ velocity, viscosity and vanity a lover's triad my final poem engraved on my spine in a language invisible to all but you god i hope you read/ i can scream i can howl but i can never go back and propell into the absurd, hope was a fugitive and my constitution never holds/ there is a god behind all this, a god who abandon, he's a jester and im his best act/ laugh, you're meant to darling, this is hilarious, my guts spilled and teeth plucked, gummy smile i love you, this is your curse your punishment/ misery malady what is it to you but poetic something elusive something to witness a play an act/ mother ill gift you solitude father ill gift you mother's grief/ lover i gift you freedom and guilt (you never wanted love only the guilt of a mutilated heart)//
[statements from the court of the mislead and the unfortunate]
















