look at the stars

Welcome to the lil' ol page of Jacqueline Forester. It's pronounced jac-alean-

[jacquelineforester]

things left unsaid || 01

[jacquelineforester]

thompsonxxander: 

Xander’s smile grew along with the shine in his eyes as the young woman’s hand motioned for the seat opposite from her, inviting him to sit with her. After all that time, the whole situation was like a dream to the american boy, the most unbelievable kind of dream. So he sat next to her, grinning all the while, his eyes never leaving hers, almost as if she was going to vanish if he lifted his glance from her. Noticing the tense atmosphere, he tried to loosen up a bit, making himself as comfortable and familiar to her as possible, thinking to himself that he would speak a little less seriously — and stare at her a little less.

“Vegan!,” he answered, sounding quite proud of his own job. “It’s a great, great job,” he spoke, a bitter spark in his smile for a second before erasing the army thoughts off of his head. “And you? How’s your job? I worked at an animal shelter before I was at the restaurant, I kind of miss if sometimes. Always being surrounded by animals was… magical.”

The way he was looking at her made her curse the universe. There he was, sitting there and looking like the young boy she fell in love with. And yet, he wasn’t. He was older and more refined, and she was sure that he had changed in some ways. She had as well. After all, it came with time and experiences. Jacqueline liked to believe that the time in which she pursued her studies changed her and made her more independent, but had that came with a price? She had been loveless, so focused on her work and her family that nothing else had ever came into the picture. Quietly, and selfishly, she wondered if Xander had done the same. But who was she to have a say? She was the one who made that choice.

Hearing that he was a vegan chef, her eyebrows raised. Being so involved in the environment and working with animals, it made her really happy that he was on board. “That’s amazing,” she responded. Whether or not he was vegan himself, knowing that he was taking some part in the cause made her happy. Her smile brightened, and she had to catch herself to not seem too enthuasiastic. After all, she was still unsure about all of this. But still, she didn’t want to be rude. She was happy to see him. Thinking about her job, she looked down at her cup before gazing out to the water out the window. “It’s everything I dreamed it to be,” she told him. Turning her head to him, she continued. “I’m not quite on the level of status that I’d like, but I’m getting there,” she noted. “I’m working with the animals in any way I can, whether it be training, or feeding, or assisting in medical.” Her eyes fell down to her cup again, her fingers fidgeting with the handle. “It makes me really happy, being there,” she said, almost to herself but also in assurance to him that she was happy with her decision that she had made when they were young. But the way she bit her lip afterwards made her remember that it had come with a big sacrifice. “I suggest visiting before you head off,” she said softly, looking at him again. “They made the sanctuary quite beautiful. It almost feels like you’re really there in their natural habitats.” 

[jacquelineforester]

things left unsaid || 01

[jacquelineforester]

thompsonxxander:

“By myself…,” he answered, his eyes still examinating the femenine body in front of him, incredulous that it was actually her. “I needed a bit of a break, y’know,” he explained, his shy smile growing on his side, “and Europe seemed like a good idea,” added Xander, not being able to refrain the thoughts that said that if he had known he was going to see her again, he would’ve taken that plane many, many years ago.

The american boy listened quietly, all of his attention on her, as if she was the only thing in the world. Well, in that moment, it felt just like it. “Yeah, been well. I, ah… I got a job as a cook in a local restaurant, a few years ago,” he said, softly biting the inside of his mouth. “Co-could I have a sit?” he politely inquired, not really sure about what kind of behaviour he was supposed to have with her. He really just wanted to keep talking to her, find out how everything had been going, stare at her beautiful dark eyes for a few more minutes —or hours—, make her smile again, even if it was only once more. And, God, he had so many questions, he just couldn’t let them be unanswered without putting up a little fight. Hell, in that specific instant, he could just stop the whole travelling thing to stay with her, it didn’t matter if he had to sleep in the street or live off McDonalds’ french fries and onion rings for days. “If you’re okay with it, of course.”

“Oh,” she responded, a little surprised that he had gone off on his own. It was just.. not like him. But then again, she wasn’t sure if she still even knew the man in front of her. Was he still the same person as before, or someone else entirely? “Yes, I see,” she said. “Europe is always an excuse to travel.” She really did love her home, and she was so happy to share it with the world. She was quite happy that her town wasn’t as popular of a destination as Paris, so things weren’t too hectic. Still, there were enough people coming into the sanctuary to keep donations and admission costs coming in. It was necessary to help the animals fed and healthy, as well as keep the workers paid. Home was her safe space, and she couldn’t imagine life anywhere else. 

Hearing about his job, she perked up a little. She did love cooking, and while she wasn’t the best at it, she was able to make a few really good meals with the help of her father’s recipes. After all, when he was alive, he had owned a restaurant in town. It made her sort of sad, realizing that the last time she had seen Xander, her father was alive. Years later, she was still heartbroken but tried to keep an open mind. After all, she had the rest of her family to think about. “That’s amazing,” she told him. She was about to continue but once he asked to sit so nervously, she paused. It was like he was treading around her, afraid that she would break. Jacqueline didn’t blame him, really. She was still tense, but as time passed, she was becoming more relaxed with him being there. She was just still so unsure. “Yes, of course,” she told him, motioning for the other seat at the table. Taking another sip of her tea, she kept her eyes on the cup for a few seconds, feeling the tense nature of the situation. “What kind of food do you cook?” she asked curiously.

[jacquelineforester]

things left unsaid || 01

[jacquelineforester]

thompsonxxander:

“I…, yeah, well, I…,” he nervously mumbled, his hand at the back of his neck, playing with the messy pieces of hair that were in the way. “Yeah. I’m on a trip,” he said, when he was finally able to finish his sentence. How? Out of every single town in France, how in hell had he ended up there, in the same café as her? His dizzy mind was in a million places at the same time, but his heart was right there, sitting in front of him, right where he had left it years ago, with a face that showed she was just as confused as him. “I, ah… I’m travelling Europe and… now going to Zurich…,” he explained, still in his blurry state of mind. He just stared at her for some time, barely able to order his thoughts.

“You look just the same,” words couldn’t be stopped as Xander sighed. He smiled and it was the most bittersweet smile he had ever had in his face, and he could feel his heartbeat going hectic as he cleared his throat, trying to mantain his composure. “How— how have you been?”

It was weird, seeing him there. He had always been such a homebody in her mind - the boy next door. And yet, there he was, traveling across the ocean. For what reason, she wasn’t sure. She had never traveled with no destination, no purpose. The idea of it was strange to her, and made her feel a little anxious. The world really was so big, and while the thought of seeing it all was exciting and intriguing, she could never do it on her own. “Zurich,” she said, her tone lighter, as if she was trying to sound excited for him. “Gorgeous place.” She had gone when she was younger, and it truly was so beautiful. She could get lost just staring at the mountains. “By yourself? Or are you with family?” she asked, curious.

Her lips quivered a little, making her bite her lip. His smile did things to her heart that she couldn’t explain. “You’ve definitely grown much taller,” she said with a small nod. All she could do was press her lips together and form the smallest grin. “I’ve been well,” she responded, folding her hands in her lap. “I’m working at the animal sanctuary a few towns away. Everything here is pretty nice.” She paused, clearing her throat quietly. “And you? I take it you’ve been well? Traveling the world is pretty exciting,” she said, although her mind was thinking back to his time in the army. She was just so glad that he was alive.

[jacquelineforester]

things left unsaid || 01

[jacquelineforester]

thompsonxxander:

Europe was big, and expensive. That was an obvious fact that Xander had heard a lot when he first told everyone back home that he was going to be travelling all the way across it, in the cheapest way possible. No hotels, no pricey means of transport, no luxury or opulence at all. And so he quit his job, left his very small town in Georgia, USA, with just his backpack, some clothes, his passport, and some money he had been saving up for years, and took the first flight to Lisbon, Portugal.

Since then, it had been two hectic months, going through some other cities and towns in both Portugal and Spain, and then taking a surprisingly cheap plane to Paris, France. After spending a couple of days in the french capital, his next destination was Zurich, Switzerland. Luckily for him, the man who had rented him his apartment in Paris knew someone who was making a roadtrip to the swiss city, and that could definitely take the ‘lovely american boy’ with them. Perfect.

It was already the afternoon when Xander was woken up by Marie, the 40-something year old driver, who told him she was making a quick stop to get some rest, and that she was going to get some coffee. As he walked out of the car, he felt like the vibe and surroundings were kind of familiar to him in some way, as if he had seen them before in pictures or the back of some postcard. He attributed the feeling to being still half asleep, and quickly moved his feet to catch up with the middle aged woman, that was already headed into a nice little café in the street right where they had parked.

Xander walked into the place and looked around, his heart sinking to his feet as he found out the answer as to why he felt connected to that small city, which’s name he hadn’t even asked for —but now already knew—, sitting in a small coffee table next to the window, staring outside, just as beautiful as she always was. All of a sudden, he was a teenager again, breathing in the salty marine breeze, back in his hometown during the best but worst summer of his life.

“Jacqueline?”

She never thought that she would ever hear that voice again, but she didn’t have to question who it was. So suddenly, she was shot back into her younger self, hearing his voice pounding through her head as they ran on the grass. It really felt like what you see in movies - all of her memories were flashing before her. Turning her head slowly, Jacqueline saw his face and felt her whole mind go blank. Why was he there? And how on Earth did he end up in the same coffee shop in the same town as her? Swallowing her tea, she wasn’t sure what to say. After all, what is there to say to someone you used to know? 

They were younger when they had first met, just about 17. Jacqueline was invited to the United States by a cousin in Georgia. It scared her, at first, being so far away from home, but she grew to like it. The small town was quaint and tightly knit, much like Colmar. But she knew in her heart that she couldn’t get attached. After all, she had to get her degree back at home. Her family was also very important to her, and she couldn’t let them down. Out of her control, meeting Xander changed everything. They were inseparable the whole summer. Jacqueline swore she had never felt more in love. But it was young love, and it was unrealistic. She knew she had to go back to France, as there was so much as stake. She was so selfless that she couldn’t recognize what her own heart needed, rather than helping creatures in need. Granted, it did make her very happy, but Xander was different. In time, her family convinced her that her dreams were bigger than him. Before she knew it, he had enlisted in the army, and she no longer had any reason to stay in America. So, she went home. And yet, she left a piece of her heart in Georgia.

“Xander,” she responded breathlessly. Her hand quivered, making the tea cup ring against the plate. Setting it down, she tried to compose herself. It was an odd experience for her, for she almost hated seeing him because of what had happened, but she was really trying to ignore how even more handsome he had become. “You’re...” she started off, her voice shaky. Clearing her throat quietly, she pressed her lips together. “You’re in France?” 

[jacquelineforester]

things left unsaid || 01

This was the hardest part of her job, and it brought all of her courage out of her to remain calm and in control. She naturally was a pretty calm and tranquil person, which was very useful in her job as a zoologist, working with animals that could be easily triggered by bad energy. But in moments like these, it was quite the challenge. 

The mother panda at the clinic was giving birth, and while it was quite the momentous occasion, not everything was going as smoothly as desired. Her vitals were dropping, and as time flew by, more and more complications arose. Jacqueline stood by, holding the panda’s paw as the doctors rushed around. Running her fingers over her soft fur, Jacqueline smiled, hoping to soothe her further. Minutes went by and she remained stable, but was still having problems. Minutes turned into hours, and to their relief, the baby panda was finally born. Jacqueline wiped the sweat off her forehead, watching as the animal cried, taking its first breaths. She smiled, taking a deep breath as she assisted in monitoring the mother.

Once her shift was over in the evening, Jacqueline walked to her favorite café in the town. Colmar was a decent sized town – not too small and not too big. Downtown was situated on the river, offering a great view. Sitting there and drinking her coffee or tea every day gave her such a sense of peacefulness and warmth. It had been an almost every day tradition for as long as she could remember, whether it be after playdates with friends or after varsity practice in high school. It was her space, and she missed it a lot while she was in college. Now, returning home to continue her degree, she felt more at peace than ever. All the while, she still couldn’t shake the missing piece that had been gone for years – her heart. Sipping on her tea and staring out the window onto the river, Jacqueline pursed her lips, silently wondering if she would ever see her summer love again, even after all of these years..