i shall not live in vain

[json-derulo]

"you were always such a good kid! we never had to worry about you :)" thanks! you actually should've, though. like about this specifically

[plumslices]

Your misbehaving boyfriend is not funny to me

[tidesandtwilight]

what is with the cop hate??

Oh sorry for the confusion. It’s because I hate cops

[geckogf]

𐔌ㅤ stand up for your right baby

[lakevida]

god remember when there were no ads AND you could post dick on here. take me back i'll be grateful this time

[podcastwizard]

you don’t realize how important lunch is until you’re wandering around thinking about how unloveable and untalented and uniquely cursed you are and then it’s 4pm and you finally eat lunch and you go Oh. oh right.

[3000s]

straight women will try to reassure you about their homophobic boyfriends the same way dog owners are always going "oh he's friendly" with their visibly agitated dog

[syrenki]

there is something within me that i would like removed

[milflaralorvan-deactivated20231]

when you see your little kitty walking toward you at a leisurely pace and say "hi baby!" bc you're excited to see her and she starts trotting a little bit faster 'cause she's excited to see you too. that's what life is all about i think

[shamebats]

"it's just stress" oh thank god, it's just the silent killer that slowly kills you, perfectly harmless, no need to worry

[uncertainlys]

MY FINGERS BARELY EVEN TOUCHED YOUR STUPID FUCKING AD STOP REDIRECTING ME TO THE APP STORE

[weltenwellen]

Hieu Minh Nguyen, from “Heavy”

[ceruleanheaven]

[looking at people younger than me] you have your whole life ahead of you [looking at people older than me] you have your whole life ahead of you [looking at myself] its over

[batmanisagatewaydrug]

sorry to be a broken record every month but christ menstruation is a stupid concept. oooooh excuse me for not getting pregnant, why the fuck is there goo falling out of me about it? grow the fuck up and reabsorb that shit for nutrients.

[goatedgreen]

i hate that when you try and look up shit for writing purposes it starts linking suicide hotlines and addiction advice articles like bro i just wanna know the information im not killing myself i promise. now tell me what i wanna know

[sacred-portal]

[srdcovka]