LIVING my LIFE to the FULLEST ♥ @jayjayevans - Tumblr Blog

finnslay

things you DO NOT need to be a man

a dick

he/him pronouns

XY chromosomes

things you DO need to be a man

the swiftness of a coursing river

the force of a great typhoon

the strength of a raging fire

the mysteriousness of the dark side of the moon

^this post was brought to you by LGBT^

Let's

Get down to

Business

To defeat the huns

deathtokillian

Ideas are cooking for my pride outfit.

sounddesignerjeans-deactivated2

I wish kinky sex ed wasn't so stigmatized even among left-leaning "sex positive" circles. Everyone's all "uwu I'm a sub I'll do anything you ask" okay mommy wants you to read The New Bottoming Book so you learn how to sub without hurting yourself since your sex ed up to this point is porn and your ex boyfriend Jared who liked to choke you incorrectly

sounddesignerjeans-deactivated2

I’m so glad you asked! Let me list off what I’ve got for you:

Books I personally recommend:

- The New Topping Book and The New Bottoming Book, by Dossie Easton and Janet W. Hardy

If you’re having kinky sex at all, you need to read at least one of these two books. Point blank. They’ll teach you the very basics of negotiating properly (which is critical!), and help you identify what you are and aren’t into.

- Mindfucking Mindfully, by Sir Ezra Where this book really shines isn’t actually in helping you “mindfuck” people, it’s in taking a close look at how to do so ethically. It’s a great answer to the question “how do I get someone to consent to something and still surprise and shock them with it?”

- Real Service by Raven Kaldera and Joshua Tenpenny This is a slightly niche pick but there simply isn’t a better book on the subject. It’s written from a 24/7 M/s perspective, which is not what I do, but the book itself is an indispensable guide to giving and receiving service. The phrase “if the Master doesn’t want it, it isn’t service” will be burned into my psyche for quite some time. I love this book a lot. Maybe my favorite out of all of these.

- Enough To Make You Blush: Exploring Erotic Humiliation, by Princess Kali This one’s high on my reading list; I’ve heard it recommended by a number of people whose opinions on these things I trust.

- Pretty Much Anything Midori Has Ever Done Midori is a great resource for this stuff - I haven’t personally read much of her work, but she’s a well known sex educator and great at what she does. She’s known for bondage, but has a lot of range beyond that.

- This Negotiations Worksheet from Bex Talks Sex This is what I default to using a lot of the time for negotiations. Forget BDSMtest, you don’t need that, it’s no good. Just look through this worksheet’s wordbank with your partner. Big fan especially of the “how do you want to feel?” section.

Books I can kind of recommend:

- The Ultimate Guide to Kink, edited by Tristan Taormino This book is weird. There’s a lot of good info for experienced players, but some of what’s written here skeeves me out. I think if I had a top that thought the way some of the tops in here think, they would not be topping me for long. But there’s some good techniques and so on to pick up that I wouldn’t have otherwise. I liked the distinction one of the authors makes between being sadistic in the sense of inflicting pain and being sadistic in the sense of doing something your sub doesn’t “enjoy.”

- The Ritual of Dominance and Submission, by David English Man, this book fucking sucks. The writing and editing are garbage, and the fear and protocol play described need way more careful negotiation than he ever lets on, let alone recommends. This is some 50 Shades bullshit. The only time I recommend this book is to tops like me who tend to be very affirming to their partners and need a guide on how to really scare them - when their partner consents and when you negotiate it, which this book sucks at teaching you. Really good content on fear, punishment, and protocol play, really terrible presentation of the topic though. Don’t read this if you don’t already know what you’re doing.

- Paradigms of Power, by Raven Kaldera I love this book. Great book. Very focused on 24/7 M/s play though, and, being an anthology, some chapters are better than others. If you can’t read something and pick out what is and isn’t for you, don’t bother. But some really great inspiration, and generally pretty well written. Big fan of the discussion of leather throughout the book.

Hope some of these are helpful for people ^-^ for the average person reading this I recommend New Bottoming/Topping, but they’re all important parts of my library and I’ve recommended all of them to friends at some point or another.

sparklefartstheunicorn

May I also suggest Hell on Wheels and Kneeling in Spirit by Raven Kaldera, d/s companion books that address kink with a disability. They're a should read for everyone, imo. You never know when you or a partner are going to have changes in your body that affect what you can physically do. Temporary illness/injury and even just age can affect your sex life.

dogspouse

I'd like to suggest Better Bondage for Every Body! It goes really in depth on anatomy, pain processing, self-tying, and has chapters specifically focusing on how to do rope bondage on/for someone who is disabled or has chronic pain, which was really important to me.

friendlycoffeefiend

reblogging specifically for these last additions bc I don't think I've ever seen resources for kink w/ disability

interestingimagery

depsidase

theprofessional-amateur

Link to thread

Link to news story

tamarrud

Israel cuts Gaza's final internet line, plunging it into total communication blackout.

Israel bombed the last main fibre route in Gaza, which means that as of June 12, all internet and fixed-line communication services are now completely cut off, further isolating Gaza amidst an ongoing genocide.

I am seeing more and more calls from inside of Gaza for help with eSims as that is currently the only way they can connect internally and with the outside world.

- Buy eSIMs here.

- If you can't afford it, you can donate any amount to this eSIM fund.

- Instructions on how to buy and share eSIMs.

beardedmrbean

crreature

some recent portraits of butches of color. via butchisnotadirtyword

shithowdy

little buddy alert!!!

(nessus sphinx moth)

depsidase

accessible-tumbling

ID: A screenshot of a Twitter post by aamir [star emoji] [heart emoji] (formerly....[trailed off @ indigokra reading:

"y'all are really losing the plot here. uprisings, riots, and militant standoffs with ice waste their time and prevent them from abducting our community. these aren't just protests, they're acts of direct action. this isn't about optics. it's about keeping families together.

surrounding ice vehicles, burning waymos, preventing the flow of traffic, and creating obstacles with barricades and debris makes ice's job much harder. a city sanctioned "peaceful protest" doesn't."

End ID.

found this cool branch in the woods. i want to mount it but i need to make sure it's clean before i nail it anywhere.

gumi-megpoidd

kianamaiart

Eclipse Turnaround 🌘

nudityandnerdery

The United States Postal Service is the latest federal agency looking to reduce its staff, according to a letter sent to Congress by the Pos

Next time you're around when the mail gets delivered, ask your delivery person if they're understaffed or not.

But don't hold them up too much, they have a lot of work to do.

naamahdarling

Y'all NEED to let your conservative family members know about this because the USPS is a LARGE employer of military veterans and has AMAZING benefits.

They employ over 100,000 veterans. Your conservative uncle needs to know those jobs are threatened.