Comedian-Audience Cooperation: Moving Forward
Given recent events at the Melbourne International Comedy Festival (MICF) and the issues it's raised surrounding rape culture, I think it's time that comedians and audience members alike had some sort of mutually agreed set of guidelines that will allow for better interactions. It's clear, from the mess that unfolded online afterwards, that only a rare few actually know how to engage in a reasoned discussion, the mundane majority achieving little more than fanning the flames.
Let's start with audience members first. Please bear in mind that I write this fully aware that there are far more important issues to discuss, such as how to eliminate rape culture. I'm writing this in the hope of outlining circumstances in which opportunities to discuss rape culture aren't shut down due to the unfavourable circumstances in which they're generated.
Firstly, at any of my shows, if there's ever a joke anyone is uncomfortable with, I would love to hear about it, as long as it makes them uncomfortable for reasons that aren't their fault. For example, I don't really care if someone religious is offended by an atheistic joke, because believing in a 3-dadded carpenter that can hear your brain from space is ridiculous. Being raped is not ridiculous, and therefore any complaint of offence that arises from that can't be dismissed under the same umbrella of "Well be offended then" that the offended religious fall under. Certain people ought to be offended by being confronted by an attitude contrary to their own when it is the case that their attitude is repugnant, or counter to society's progress - not everyone though, and this go-to, fallback mentality of comedians of "Well it's a comedy night, you might get offended" is fucking dumb.
However, I'd genuinely like to hear your complaint in a manner that doesn't increase the statistical likelihood of me backfiring and saying something dumb because I'm surprised, shocked, and not thinking clearly. Because then the conversation might get lost. The opportunity destroyed. And I don't want that. When I'm wrong, I love to hear why, because then we both benefit: you get to register your criticism, and I end up being one less wrong fact closer to having a worldview that's 100% right.
Of course it's a free world, and I'm absolutely not saying you can't register your protest however you want. Do it: throw a bottle, continuously shout so I can't get any more words out, start a slow clap. It's a comedy night: anything goes and I fully defend your right to do whatever you want. That being said, that doesn't mean I don't think there are better ways to protest. None of them wrong, just some of them better. For me, I'd love if it if someone stuck their hand up, or said, "Excuse me!" I would stop. "Yeah?" I would say, shielding my face against the spotlight so I can actually see the audience. "I found that last joke offensive and inappropriate. But please go on, but after the show, I'd like to explain to you why that joke is a bad idea. If there are others in the audience who agree, perhaps they could join as well."
"Sure. Absolutely. I'm happy to hear anything you have to say. Let's all grab some beers or something. Make it non-confrontational." I'd say. Perhaps my explanation of the logic behind the joke might change some minds. Perhaps I'd be made to realise I'd legitimately offended people for no reason, no comedic purpose: just offence.
In the case above, I'd also encourage people to get out a smartphone and record the audio of the subsequent, post-gig conversation. Either everyone could record it, or one person could, and then we'd all swap email addresses so that the resulting audio could be emailed out to everyone. You know, just so that third-party hearsay couldn't distort what was said.
There are huge problems with that above scenario, naturally. Mainly, that if a joke has been told that makes you feel threatened, it takes courage to speak up. I'm putting an unfair amount of onus on you, the audience member, to conquer the uncomfortable situation you've been put in, in order to discuss that precise situation. If you'd rather just shout out "Fuck you!" or "Rape culture apologist" and walk out, then do it. I'd rather you didn't though. I'd rather hear from, and learn from you.
The reason I'm suggesting we try to create an environment where post-gig, open, welcomed criticism becomes a convention (again, for this specifically, not for other types of offence) is that I don't trust comedians to not be stupid, and in a confrontational situation, be a heightened level of stupid. There's no qualification necessary to be a comedian, other than to make people laugh. Even being a successful comedian is no mark of intelligence: look at what's popular in mainstream culture, and you'll realise that whatever it is that makes that demographic laugh won't be all that sophisticated and scholarly.
Imagine if "rape-juggling" were a thing: some sort of juggling at a circus that's somehow about rape. If that offended you, how eloquent do you think that performer would be if presented with a protest? All they know is juggling, not feminist theory. Most comedians are just jugglers, and are the last people that should be called upon to be ambassadors for their own art form (we'll come back to this). Just ask Khaled Khalafalla.
As such, if a joke scares you, reignites a trauma, or triggers a painful memory, I want that to be discussed precisely with the person that told the joke. They need to learn. They need to understand. If they're doing wrong, make them a better person (again, I am, so far, asking so much sympathy be given to the lesser victim here - I'll redress this in a second! - Also, I’m imagining the person on stage is reasonable and generally unthreatening: if not, then this scenario falls apart). If, however, it escalates and one side does something, or says something stupid, then I feel like both sides lose, because then it just descends into two-way abuse online between ignited communities who weren't there.
So just to reiterate before we move on: at any of my gigs, never feel unwelcome to question my material and educate me. I am a nice person and I think most comedians are, though sometimes careless. If possible, I'd like criticism to happen in a way that's conducive to everyone still enjoying themselves, and to me actually learning something and openly hearing your concerns and vice versa (if the fault is someone's over-sensitivity [which I very much doubt it can be with rape... perhaps other topics] rather than my joke... but again, that can only be explained in an open-minded environment).
Of course, once a rape joke has been made, especially one that either punches down or nowhere, it’s really not my place to be able to ask how the offence / trauma should be dealt with. All of the above is really the asking of a giant favour. Also, I don’t mean any of the above to suggest that the first move should be made by audience members. Comedians need to state their support of such an environment first, so that then audience members feel comfortable to raise objections without feeling like they’re going to get “taken down”.
Ok, now to comedians.
It's hard on stage. I get that. I'm terrible at dealing with hecklers. I think I have, on one occasion, verbally wished someone dead. People at the gig would know, from my tone, that it was uttered in jest: a throwaway line with no malice. But it would be said. And it would appear on paper as those exact words "I wish you were dead / I hope you die".
Damage Control
So, in a situation that's arisen from mentioning "rape" - whether it's a rape joke, or just a joke that uses the word - you're now in dangerous territory and you need to be fucking smart (a problem as a lot of comedians are dumb... out of all the ones I know, I would call upon about five to verbally defend anything). Here are some tips:
1. Direct your anger towards yourself. You're still a comedian on stage. Keep up the role. "I wish I were fucking dead right now" is already a significant improvement. "After this gig I'm going to go home and burn my notes... then my dreams of ever making it." I don't know. Self-deprecate. "Yeah... that joke was funny in my head before it was met with reality and facts".
2. "This is worse than that time that [something funny happened]." Invent a story, something. Point is, use your discomfort / the awfulness of the situation as a segue.
3. Damage control: as I've discussed above, make their protest an opportunity to reach out. "Ok, if that joke has put you in a bad place, I'm sorry and I'm happy to stick around after the show and hear what you have to say. Now, can you come out from under the table? You look about as uncomfortable under there as I feel up here right now."
You're Not An Ambassador
Remember that rigorous interview process you had to go through to get the job of comedian? No, neither do I. None of us went through that. You literally turn up at an open mic night, get 3-5 minutes for your first time, and suddenly your twitter bio says you're a "Sydney-based comic" or some equally reality-shunning nonsense. You do 30 gigs and suddenly you're an "Up and comer". No you're not.
Point is, while I believe in free speech, I also believe in the virtue of self-restraint. Free speech sort of loses its value if you don't cherish it enough to know when not to say something (one of my major gripes with twitter's philosophy of encouraging you to say whatever's on your mind). As such, if you are a "comedian" (you've done one gig) please ask yourself whether the comedic community needs you as an ambassador in situations like this. Chances are, it doesn't. Very few of you are good at articulating a defence of free speech, or defending an offensive joke.
In the same way that I wouldn't trust a grunt on the front lines of a war to coordinate strategy, I trust less than 5% of you with the responsibility of speaking on behalf of an entire art form that's existed for decades. Get on stage, tell your early-days jokes about wanking, and leave it at that. When a rape culture debate explodes online, don't get all finger-happy on twitter and think you can make anything better. You're actually fanning flames, and making comedians look like a bad and unapproachable bunch of whiny idiots. Again, you're just a juggler or a dancing bear, not a feminist academic, nor a free speech scholar. Chances are, you're probably just saying something dumb like "It's a comedian's right to offend people" to impress the ghost of Bill Hicks who doesn't give a shit about you.
When the debate explodes online, that's not your invitation to be a hero of the comedic community. You certainly don't represent me anyway. I didn't vote for you. Don't go round tweeting at feminists saying "It's just a joke, get a sense of humour" or what you think comedy is about. It's probably not what I think comedy is about anyway (for me?: satire, ethics, improving the world, criticising mainstream culture, religion, you?: wanking, jokes about jizzm, relationship break-ups). Don't GamerGate this into a situation where being a "comedian" automatically affiliates me with a load of deluded free-speech warriors who have got the wrong end of the stick and I have to rename myself to "Laughter Technician". Which leads me to...
Comedian's Purpose
I must have missed the meeting where we all decided that comedians have to push boundaries, test taboos, test the limits etc. Lots of very famous comedians have done that, but then they were extremely good and knew how to make that work. There are also lots of great comedians who don't do that. Both sets of comedians were actually trying the same thing: to make people laugh. If pushing boundaries falls within that, it's as a subordinate motivation to the primary one: laughter generation. Monty Python shocked a lot of people by making The Life of Brian, which has stood the test of time. A movie about lots of rape would have been shocking and zero funny.
It's such an odd and arbitrary definition of what it means to be a comedian anyway. They're on stage with a microphone, there to make people laugh. How do you get from that premise to the conclusion "They therefore have to say 'rape' because no one else can." There's literally nothing connecting those two points. You might as well argue it's a surgeon's job to offend people, or a cellist's job to play the cello in such a way that makes people nauseous, or an artist's job to only paint pictures of bestial necrophilia.
It's a comedian's job to make people laugh first, and (preferably) think second. There are comedians who're offensive, really offensive, but manage to make it work because the offence works towards making you think.
It's also about the right kind of offence. Again, offending a catholic because you rip into God's views on homosexuality is worth it because you're countering something negative ("punching up"). Tolerance of intolerance is cowardice, and we ought to speak out against bigotry and intolerance. But there are some kinds of offence caused by "punching down" and I think there's a weird conflation of both of these kinds of offence that then gets put under the same offence umbrella. They’re totally different: one is comedy that gets laughter by (offensively) destroying that which prevents us from aspiring to be better, the other just offends through shock at a victim’s expense.
“What about jokes about murder?” I don’t know: chances are, no one in the audience has been murdered. “What about jokes about diabetes?” Chances are it’s been made by a comedian with diabetes in a way that’s cathartic or enlightening about the disease, rather than “Hey, anyone in the audience got diabetes. Ha!” “What about jokes about paedophilia?” They’re usually critical of paedophiles / catholic priests, rather than laughing at someone who was sexually abused as a kid.
There's nothing about being a comedian that entitles you to offend people for no reason. Where did this bizarre delusion come from? Literally ask yourself, "Why is it comedians get to offend people for no reason?" and hear your own voice as you try to justify it. You sound ridiculous. You might as well argue that it's the point of origami to make people feel threatened.
Again, I'm all for offending people who contrive to be offended by taking on bizarre stances / attitudes to contemporary existence, but being raped isn't someone's attempt to be a pain in the arse at your gig, so deal with it.
Rape Jokes
Just ask yourself if it's worth it? I'd hate for comedians to avoid telling certain jokes altogether. As has been pointed out, there are comedians out there doing great material about rape. I've tried it myself, and might revive the following joke at Melbourne (context: playing off a quote made by a Mullah whose name escapes me now):
"[Name] said women need to wear a veil in public because otherwise they might get raped. Which... yeah... that happens to me all the time. I'm walking behind a woman in the street, she turns her head and I see her naked nose, and I think ‘That's it. Now I have to rape you.’
Of course what [name] forgets is that, rather than seeing a woman's face, the leading cause of rape is... being a rapist."
I did that joke for a while in 2013/14 and it always went down well. That being said, I also used to tell the following joke:
"Watch Big Brother? No thanks, I'd rather be gang raped by werewolves."
That also always went down well too, but it is using rape as part of a punchline, but then the "werewolves" part to me always disseminated any potential triggering by rendering it utterly unrealistic and fantasy-based. Nevertheless, if someone said they found it offensive, I'd drop it, and I dropped it anyway, precisely because it didn't satisfy my own criteria of "being worth it". There are other analogies I could use instead that don't rely on the horror of rape to convey my sense of disgust at Big Brother. (would genuinely be interested to know what you think).
Point is, simply by saying the word "rape", you are entering into a seriously complex domain. All the world is asking you to do is to explore whether you think your joke is worth it. If not, drop it. How long is your set anyway? 10 minutes? An hour? You'd be losing 24 seconds out of that. So write a new 24-second joke. Just because you're a comedian doesn't mean you're not a citizen of the world.
In conclusion, I'd say that us comedians need to go about conveying the sense that we're capable of handling criticism. We're not babies. We can take criticism. We have to take criticism: we're performing in a public space for fuck's sake. Which of you is it that thinks you get to dump your thoughts in front of a crowd and then run off without consequence? Either own and defend your material, or don't write any. If it offends people, deal with it responsibly. And no, your art is not sacred to the point that you get to tell people to go fuck themselves for having a valid objection to your material. Party's over. Sorry. To the wrong side of history you go.
We can do that in tandem with the audience, and generate an environment that's still rowdy, raucous, outrageous and fun, and accept that part of that atmosphere involves the free speech of the audience, that can be expressed in any way, and that we have to react to that in a mature, respectful fashion. In return, if we promise to be able to handle legitimate criticism (unjustified criticism can still be told to "go fuck itself" if you have the wit to prove, there and then on stage, that it is unjustified) then the audience should feel confident to educate you after the gig on what it was that crossed the line.
If you're met with a heckle after a rape joke, have the self-awareness to realise what world it is you're now stepping into and handle it well. Use your craft.
Also, you're not a rock star. It's not your job to offend people. Who said that? When did we agree to that? Lots of comedians say it, but so what? Loads of people thought the earth was flat. Loads of dumb shits think global warming isn't happening. Just because big name comedians tell you that you get to say "whatever the fuck you want" doesn't mean it's true. Question that. Use your inside brain voice and question it. Don't just go along with it because you fancy yourself the next Lenny Bruce (who, by the way, most often offended for a good reason): chances are you're not that good.
I hope comedians will continue pushing audiences and the way they think, but I hope not just for the sake of it. And I hope, should that ever go wrong and a line is crossed, that both audience and comedian will be able to take the steps necessary to communicate with each other and learn.
Raise your hand, talk to me. I only want to improve. I only want us all to improve. But if you sit under a table, that's fine by me too.
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