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@jblue26tx
That lineup doe
Do You Love Someone With Depression?
If you have a partner or are close to someone who struggles with depression, you may not always know how to show them you love them. One day they may seem fine, and the next they are sad, distant and may push you away. It is important that you know that as a person who is close to them and trusted by them, you can help your friend or partner have shorter, less severe bouts of depression. Mental illness is as real as physical illness (it is physical actually, read more about that here) and your partner needs you as much as they would need to be cared for if they had the flu.
Your relationship may seem one-sided during these times, but by helping your partner through a very difficult and painful affliction, you are strengthening your relationship and their mental health in the long term.
1. Help them keep clutter at bay.
When a person begins spiraling into depression, they may feel like they are slowing down while the world around them speeds up. The mail may end up in stacks, dishes can pile up in the sink, laundry may go undone as the depressed person begins to feel more and more overwhelmed by their daily routine and unable to keep up. By giving your partner some extra help sorting mail, washing dishes or using paper plates and keeping chaos in check in general, you’ll be giving them (and yourself) the gift of a calm environment. (I’m a fan of the minimalist movement because of this, you can read more about that here.)
2. Fix them a healthy meal.
Your partner may do one of two things when they are in a depressed state. They may eat very little, or they may overeat. In either case, they may find that driving through a fast food restaurant or ordering a pizza online is just easier than fixing a meal. Eating like this, or neglecting to eat will only degrade your partner’s health, causing them to go deeper into their depression. Help your loved one keep their body healthy, and their mind will follow. This is a great article that talks about the “Brain Diet” which can help the symptoms of depression, and this article talks about how our modern diet could contribute to the recent rise in depression. Here is a recipe for a trail mix that is quick to make and has mood-boosting properties.
3.Get them outside.
The benefits of getting outside for a depressed person are huge. And it is possibly the last thing on earth your partner will want to do. Take them to be somewhere in nature. Pack a picnic and lie in the sun, take a leisurely hike or plant a garden. Being barefoot in the dirt, or “earthing” helps ground the body and reverse the effects of living in a world of emf’s, and digging in soil can actually act as an antidepressant, as a strain of bacterium in soil, Mycobacterium vaccae, triggers the release of seratonin, which in turn elevates mood and decreases anxiety. Sunshine increases Vitamin D production which can help alleviate depression. My friend Elizabeth wrote an excellent post about Vitamin D and its link to depression here. For more information about other sources of Vitamin D, this is a great post as well as this.
4. Ask them to help you understand what they’re feeling.
If your partner is able to articulate what they are going through, it will help them and you better understand what you are dealing with, and may give insight into a plan of action for helping your partner. Also, feeling alone is common for a depressed person and anything that combats that feeling will help alleviate the severity and length of the depression.
5. Encourage them to focus on self-care.
Depressed people often stop taking care of themselves. Showering, getting haircuts, going to the doctor or dentist, it’s all just too hard, and they don’t deserve to be well taken care of anyway in their minds. This can snowball quickly into greater feelings of worthlessness since “Now I’m such a mess, no one could ever love me”. Help your loved one by being proactive. Tell them “I’m going to do the dishes, why don’t you go enjoy a bubble bath?” can give them the permission they won’t give themselves to do something normal, healthy and self-loving.
6. Hug them.
Studies show that a sincere hug that lasts longer than 20 seconds can release feel-good chemicals in the brain and elevate the mood of the giver and receiver. Depressed people often don’t want to be touched, but a sincere hug with no expectation of anything further can give your partner a lift.
7. Laugh with them.
Telling a silly joke, watching a comedy or seeing a stand up comedian will encourage your partner to laugh in spite of themselves. Laughing releases endorphins and studies show can actually counteract symptoms of depression and anxiety.
8. Reassure them that you can handle their feelings.
Your partner may be feeling worthless, angry and even guilty while they are depressed. They may be afraid that they will end up alone because no one will put up with their episodes forever. Reassure them that you are in the relationship for the long haul and they won’t scare you away because they have an illness.
9. Challenge their destructive thoughts.
A depressed person’s mind can be a never-ending loop of painful, destructive thoughts. “I’m unlovable, I’m a failure, I’m ugly, I’m stupid”. Challenge these untruths with the truth. “You’re not unlovable, I love you. You aren’t a failure, here are all the things you’ve accomplished.”
10.Remind them why you love them.
Look at pictures of happy times you’ve had together. Tell them your favorite things about them. Reminisce about your relationship and all the positive things that have happened, and remind your partner that you love them and they will get through this.
(via The Darling Bakers)
Along with these great tips, here few extra things NOT to do:
Don’t tell them to just try to think positively. This is NOT helpful because depression is a mental illness, not just a negative outlook or a choice.
Don’t wait for them to reach out to you. Reaching out can feel impossibly daunting for someone with depression, even if they want company badly, so try to initiate time together as much as possible.
Don’t diminish their experiences or feelings with stuff like “Everyone has bad days” or “I used to feel like you but I got through it”. These might be intended to help but they don’t.
Don’t make jokes about suicide or self harm around your friend, as they may be struggling with those things and feel unsupported by those around them.
Don’t go too long without checking in. Expressing feelings can be hard when depressed, so initiate conversations by asking them how they’re doing and making yourself available as a listening ear. Don’t assume that they are okay just because they haven’t told you that they’re struggling.
Also for those with anxiety
The Signs as High Thoughts
Aries: If I think in my own voice, does my dog think in his own barks?
Taurus: What are snails even trying to do
Gemini: Mars is populated entirely by robots
Cancer: If Obama was the president of Kenya, he would be their first white president
Leo: Everyday, someone on Earth unknowingly does the biggest poo in the world for that day
Virgo: Thanks to the Internet, I have probably seen more naked ladies than all of my ancestors combined
Libra: When a pregnant woman swims, she is a human submarine.
Scorpio: The first teacher ever didn't go to school
Sagittarius: I wonder if my dog always follows me into the bathroom when I have to go potty because I always follow him outside when he does and he just thinks that's how it works
Capricorn: Cup holders are cups for cups
Aquarius: My stomach thinks all potato is mashed.
Pisces: I wonder what my dog named me
//cats & boxes
are you fuckin kiddin me
“If I fits, I sits” applies to all cats
How to catch a cat, ANY cat
Cats do this cuz it makes them feel safer and relieves their anxiety
A Chain Chomp cat bed from catastrophicreations.com
#this.is.Fun let’s do it 🎸
If you want sex, have sex. Have sex with a person who wants to have sex with you and have it when both of you want it. Don’t plan it. Don’t delay it. Don’t suppress it. Don’t perform it. Have it. Stop caring about whether you’ve shaved or not. Or whether there’s a zit on your back you wanted to get rid of before the person you desire sees you in the nude. Stop worrying about the taste the garlic bread you had for lunch left in your mouth or the sound of the moans you can’t keep in when they touch your sweaty body. Stop worrying about how that body looks to you in the mirror. It’s not what they see. Turn off the movie that’s playing in your head and switch to reality. If you want this to be art so badly, see it as the most colorful painting there ever was. Dashes of paint in lust black and sperm white and bruise blue and blood red and labia pink on a canvas made of human skin, in a broken frame of shaky bones. There is no perfection in sex. None in you. None in them. You’re not acting out a scene from a goddamn novel. You’re writing your own. You’re not looking for flawlessness, you’re looking for pleasure. You’re a driven, instinctive, hungry being, not the lie of softness and beauty around it. Feel them, don’t gaze. Move intuitively, not predicted. Laugh if you have to, stop if you need to. Be safe, but not mentally. Devour the moment and let go.
On Sex ( I hope to include this in my novel )
I’m fine
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I may not be into the icp stuff now days but dam aint this true tho
"It's okay, because if things get rocky, at least i got to experience something new and different."
- Sagittarius (zodiacsociety)
The Gentrification of Hip Hop
Esteemed filmmaker Spike Lee came under fire recently for being outspoken about the gentrification currently taking place in Brooklyn, New York. One of Lee’s complaints is that the new neighbors in these revamped cities and neighborhoods don’t have any respect for the culture and history of the cities they are now flocking to (x).
For many people, Brooklyn is synonymous with hip hop culture. Brooklyn has given birth to some of largest names in rap music such as Jay Z, Notorious B.I.G., Mos Def, and multiple others. However, much like the city it became popular in, rap has taken a cultural shift within the past few years, largely due to the many white hip hop artist that have become popular.
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