The Biggest Jerk-Off In Town

I love characters who would drag me to the ground if we met. I love them so much. Submit your beloved jerks here.

[jerktournament]

JERK TOURNAMENT RESULTS

The ultimate Tumblr jerk has been crowned victorious!

Congratulations to our winning queen GLaDOS!

That will be all for jerk tournament. I don't think I'm insane enough to want to do a loser's bracket or anything else here. It was fun while it lasted. It was nice knowing you, jerk nation o7

[jerktournament]

Thank you for the boops. If you get a boop back it's probably from my main so it won't look like a boop back. But that makes it a stealth mission. You'll never see me coming.

[jerktournament]

oh, I forgot I was going to do this once jerkpoll ended

here is the spreadsheet of all submitted characters and their propaganda (of course, only if they elected to have it featured in the bracket)

[jerktournament]

FINAL ROUND - GLaDOS (Portal) VS Herbert P Bear (Club Penguin)

THE FINAL JERKOFF

GLaDOS

Herbert P. Bear

Voting ended onJan 15, 2024

!!! PROPAGANDA BELOW !!!

GLaDOS: "So mot only is she running your character through a series of puzzles with the intention of killing her at the end, but in the second game she spends the Entire. Time. Verbally and emotionally abusing you, including body shaming and bullying you for being an orphan. If it's any consolation, she does have to exist as a potato for the second and third acts of Portal 2."

"Known for being mean (hot). Mercilessly targets the player character's every possible insecurity. Petty and mean. I understand if you don't want to include her since she tends to dominate polls, lol."

HERBERT: "This mf spends his whole life trying to heat up a frozen island and terrorizing the innocent penguins that live on it all bc he was bad at sailing one time and is too much of a wimp to try again. Classic Misery loves Company type asshole."

"operation blackout would have been NOTHING without him (mostly because he caused it). he has a SOLAR LASER. this polar bear is an ass who literally harnessed the power of the sun and froze the top members of the elite penguin force (a group of penguin special agents) and his best friend is an equally villainous crab"

"Herbert may be a fandom darling in our fandom of like, 20 people. BUT DON'T LET THAT FOOL YOU! He is a conniving, EVIL bear, and a professional jerk and some highlights of his jerkishness include...

- Spending ten years of his life (by the time the game closed) trying to destroy the Penguin Secret Agency and Elite Penguin Force (both were agencies that protected the island from disasters and villains like Herbert) with varying success...

- SUCCESSFULLY destroyed the Penguin Secret Agency with a popcorn bomb, which destroyed their HQ. It should also be noted that while doing so, he locked in the player, Rookie, and Gary the Gadget Guy, presumably so the bombs explosion would have killed them all.

-Teamed up with the EPF to stop the Ultimate Protobot 10,000 and the Test Bots, a small group of four dangerous robots after he personally brought them back. When Protobot went "too far" for Herbert's standards by threatening the environment and trying to completely destroy the EPF (despite the aforementioned Popcorn Bomb incident literally destroying the PSA, and also a certain Operation: Blackout), causing him to temporarily switch sides. This might sound like a character growth moment...except for the fact that he immediately betrays them once Protobot is dealt with and attacks and damages the EPF's HQ using a robot hydra made for the Medieval Party that he stole.

- A canonical ex-dictator. Don't believe me? Look up Operation: Blackout on the Club Penguin Wiki! He froze several agents during his reign of terror, was open to freezing innocent civilians, and also wanted to do away with puffles- the pets of penguins. He also banned several hobbies and professions during his reign (being a Ninja, a DJ, a Pirate, etc) for no reason other than disliking them. He also destroyed the EPF'S HQ and exposed two agents' private information to the public. This means Herbert is the first and only character to canonically dox people he doesn't like on Club Penguin.

-Was planning to bomb the EPF literally two months later with a hot sauce bomb (makes sense in context of the game and yes, it is more destructive than it sounds).

-Brainwashed puffles into digging coins for him purely because his henchman, Klutzy the crab brought a coin slot to use for his DIY heater, instead of just removing the coin slot and retooling it to work without one like a normal person."

[jerktournament]

Congrats to GLaDOS for winning Peak Jerk!

[jerktournament]

FINAL ROUND - GLaDOS (Portal) VS Herbert P Bear (Club Penguin)

THE FINAL JERKOFF

GLaDOS

Herbert P. Bear

Voting ended onJan 15, 2024

!!! PROPAGANDA BELOW !!!

GLaDOS: "So mot only is she running your character through a series of puzzles with the intention of killing her at the end, but in the second game she spends the Entire. Time. Verbally and emotionally abusing you, including body shaming and bullying you for being an orphan. If it's any consolation, she does have to exist as a potato for the second and third acts of Portal 2."

"Known for being mean (hot). Mercilessly targets the player character's every possible insecurity. Petty and mean. I understand if you don't want to include her since she tends to dominate polls, lol."

HERBERT: "This mf spends his whole life trying to heat up a frozen island and terrorizing the innocent penguins that live on it all bc he was bad at sailing one time and is too much of a wimp to try again. Classic Misery loves Company type asshole."

"operation blackout would have been NOTHING without him (mostly because he caused it). he has a SOLAR LASER. this polar bear is an ass who literally harnessed the power of the sun and froze the top members of the elite penguin force (a group of penguin special agents) and his best friend is an equally villainous crab"

"Herbert may be a fandom darling in our fandom of like, 20 people. BUT DON'T LET THAT FOOL YOU! He is a conniving, EVIL bear, and a professional jerk and some highlights of his jerkishness include...

- Spending ten years of his life (by the time the game closed) trying to destroy the Penguin Secret Agency and Elite Penguin Force (both were agencies that protected the island from disasters and villains like Herbert) with varying success...

- SUCCESSFULLY destroyed the Penguin Secret Agency with a popcorn bomb, which destroyed their HQ. It should also be noted that while doing so, he locked in the player, Rookie, and Gary the Gadget Guy, presumably so the bombs explosion would have killed them all.

-Teamed up with the EPF to stop the Ultimate Protobot 10,000 and the Test Bots, a small group of four dangerous robots after he personally brought them back. When Protobot went "too far" for Herbert's standards by threatening the environment and trying to completely destroy the EPF (despite the aforementioned Popcorn Bomb incident literally destroying the PSA, and also a certain Operation: Blackout), causing him to temporarily switch sides. This might sound like a character growth moment...except for the fact that he immediately betrays them once Protobot is dealt with and attacks and damages the EPF's HQ using a robot hydra made for the Medieval Party that he stole.

- A canonical ex-dictator. Don't believe me? Look up Operation: Blackout on the Club Penguin Wiki! He froze several agents during his reign of terror, was open to freezing innocent civilians, and also wanted to do away with puffles- the pets of penguins. He also banned several hobbies and professions during his reign (being a Ninja, a DJ, a Pirate, etc) for no reason other than disliking them. He also destroyed the EPF'S HQ and exposed two agents' private information to the public. This means Herbert is the first and only character to canonically dox people he doesn't like on Club Penguin.

-Was planning to bomb the EPF literally two months later with a hot sauce bomb (makes sense in context of the game and yes, it is more destructive than it sounds).

-Brainwashed puffles into digging coins for him purely because his henchman, Klutzy the crab brought a coin slot to use for his DIY heater, instead of just removing the coin slot and retooling it to work without one like a normal person."

[toonirl]

Well folks, we've had a good run, but if we're going down here, we're going down fighting. So without further ado, here is our final

HERBERT P. BEAR CRIME OF THE WEEK

Without a doubt, the jerkiest and by proxy funniest crime, bar none, Herbert P Bear has ever committed?

EXIST!!!!!

This is Chris Hendricks, aka Screenhog, aka one of the first artists and composers to have worked on Club Penguin. In this video he discusses various features added to the game that he was initially against, including Herbert himself.

Imagine the thought of you being so awful that one of the guys in charge of the world you live in thinking it would be a bad idea to have you around. Literally eat shit GLaDOS*.

And then Herbert said "DID IT ANYWAYS BITCH"

*For legal reasons this is a joke pls don't deadly neurotoxin me bestie haha

[jerktournament]

I love that all the Herbert fans (myself included) are completely fine with GLADOs winning. Like it's not even a sore loose we all believe Herbert should be 2nd

.

[jerktournament]

idk if it's been said yet but no matter who wins, thanks for running the tourney! it's been fun to see everyone get hyped about a bunch of their fandoms 💙 😊

Thank you! I did enjoy seeing everyone go bananas over fandoms I've either never been near or barely delved into. I've learned a lot about characters I only heard about maybe once or twice before this.

And thanks to all voters for bearing with the long pauses between polls. We made it to the finals before 2025 🥂

[jerktournament]

if herbert has to go down at least it's to glados. he's not going down tho

sorry anon I forgot to post this when it was sent (during the semifinals).

[jerktournament]

As a Herbert voter and fan of both characters literally all I ask is that GLaDOS voters make her win at 69%. Like come on it would be funny guys!! YOU KNOW YOU WANT TO!

.

[jerktournament]

FINAL ROUND - GLaDOS (Portal) VS Herbert P Bear (Club Penguin)

THE FINAL JERKOFF

GLaDOS

Herbert P. Bear

Voting ended onJan 15, 2024

!!! PROPAGANDA BELOW !!!

GLaDOS: "So mot only is she running your character through a series of puzzles with the intention of killing her at the end, but in the second game she spends the Entire. Time. Verbally and emotionally abusing you, including body shaming and bullying you for being an orphan. If it's any consolation, she does have to exist as a potato for the second and third acts of Portal 2."

"Known for being mean (hot). Mercilessly targets the player character's every possible insecurity. Petty and mean. I understand if you don't want to include her since she tends to dominate polls, lol."

HERBERT: "This mf spends his whole life trying to heat up a frozen island and terrorizing the innocent penguins that live on it all bc he was bad at sailing one time and is too much of a wimp to try again. Classic Misery loves Company type asshole."

"operation blackout would have been NOTHING without him (mostly because he caused it). he has a SOLAR LASER. this polar bear is an ass who literally harnessed the power of the sun and froze the top members of the elite penguin force (a group of penguin special agents) and his best friend is an equally villainous crab"

"Herbert may be a fandom darling in our fandom of like, 20 people. BUT DON'T LET THAT FOOL YOU! He is a conniving, EVIL bear, and a professional jerk and some highlights of his jerkishness include...

- Spending ten years of his life (by the time the game closed) trying to destroy the Penguin Secret Agency and Elite Penguin Force (both were agencies that protected the island from disasters and villains like Herbert) with varying success...

- SUCCESSFULLY destroyed the Penguin Secret Agency with a popcorn bomb, which destroyed their HQ. It should also be noted that while doing so, he locked in the player, Rookie, and Gary the Gadget Guy, presumably so the bombs explosion would have killed them all.

-Teamed up with the EPF to stop the Ultimate Protobot 10,000 and the Test Bots, a small group of four dangerous robots after he personally brought them back. When Protobot went "too far" for Herbert's standards by threatening the environment and trying to completely destroy the EPF (despite the aforementioned Popcorn Bomb incident literally destroying the PSA, and also a certain Operation: Blackout), causing him to temporarily switch sides. This might sound like a character growth moment...except for the fact that he immediately betrays them once Protobot is dealt with and attacks and damages the EPF's HQ using a robot hydra made for the Medieval Party that he stole.

- A canonical ex-dictator. Don't believe me? Look up Operation: Blackout on the Club Penguin Wiki! He froze several agents during his reign of terror, was open to freezing innocent civilians, and also wanted to do away with puffles- the pets of penguins. He also banned several hobbies and professions during his reign (being a Ninja, a DJ, a Pirate, etc) for no reason other than disliking them. He also destroyed the EPF'S HQ and exposed two agents' private information to the public. This means Herbert is the first and only character to canonically dox people he doesn't like on Club Penguin.

-Was planning to bomb the EPF literally two months later with a hot sauce bomb (makes sense in context of the game and yes, it is more destructive than it sounds).

-Brainwashed puffles into digging coins for him purely because his henchman, Klutzy the crab brought a coin slot to use for his DIY heater, instead of just removing the coin slot and retooling it to work without one like a normal person."

[abearthatwrites]

All right SO in PSA Mission 10: Waddle Squad, the PSA successfully captures Herbert. G comes out with a flip chart and goes over options for what to do with Herbert now that he's been captured.

Option 1: Ban Herbert from the island forever. Stick him on another iceberg, and send him on his way.

Option 2: Detain Herbert in a holding cell until he's learned his lesson.

Option 3: Make Herbert do community service until he's paid his debt to society.

Option 4: Let Herbert go. Because we're nice.

Let's sit down and actually think this through. Option 1 is a total win/win: Herbert wants a quiet, warm tropical paradise. The island wants Herbert to stop terrorizing them. By exiling Herbert, he has the chance to get his paradise, and the island gets to stop being terrorized (more or less)! Literally nobody loses!

So which option does Herbert choose?

Option 4. The one where we just let him go, so he's free to continue terrorizing the island. Option 1 was a choice where literally EVERYONE wins, and he chose the option where he keeps being miserable - and the island is miserable alongside him.

What a jerk.

BONUS: Herbert being given the right to remain silent.

Literally the player can call him out for being rude slfjvfsobh anyway VOTE HERBERT FOR BIGGEST JERK

[jerktournament]

FINAL ROUND - GLaDOS (Portal) VS Herbert P Bear (Club Penguin)

THE FINAL JERKOFF

GLaDOS

Herbert P. Bear

Voting ended onJan 15, 2024

!!! PROPAGANDA BELOW !!!

GLaDOS: "So mot only is she running your character through a series of puzzles with the intention of killing her at the end, but in the second game she spends the Entire. Time. Verbally and emotionally abusing you, including body shaming and bullying you for being an orphan. If it's any consolation, she does have to exist as a potato for the second and third acts of Portal 2."

"Known for being mean (hot). Mercilessly targets the player character's every possible insecurity. Petty and mean. I understand if you don't want to include her since she tends to dominate polls, lol."

HERBERT: "This mf spends his whole life trying to heat up a frozen island and terrorizing the innocent penguins that live on it all bc he was bad at sailing one time and is too much of a wimp to try again. Classic Misery loves Company type asshole."

"operation blackout would have been NOTHING without him (mostly because he caused it). he has a SOLAR LASER. this polar bear is an ass who literally harnessed the power of the sun and froze the top members of the elite penguin force (a group of penguin special agents) and his best friend is an equally villainous crab"

"Herbert may be a fandom darling in our fandom of like, 20 people. BUT DON'T LET THAT FOOL YOU! He is a conniving, EVIL bear, and a professional jerk and some highlights of his jerkishness include...

- Spending ten years of his life (by the time the game closed) trying to destroy the Penguin Secret Agency and Elite Penguin Force (both were agencies that protected the island from disasters and villains like Herbert) with varying success...

- SUCCESSFULLY destroyed the Penguin Secret Agency with a popcorn bomb, which destroyed their HQ. It should also be noted that while doing so, he locked in the player, Rookie, and Gary the Gadget Guy, presumably so the bombs explosion would have killed them all.

-Teamed up with the EPF to stop the Ultimate Protobot 10,000 and the Test Bots, a small group of four dangerous robots after he personally brought them back. When Protobot went "too far" for Herbert's standards by threatening the environment and trying to completely destroy the EPF (despite the aforementioned Popcorn Bomb incident literally destroying the PSA, and also a certain Operation: Blackout), causing him to temporarily switch sides. This might sound like a character growth moment...except for the fact that he immediately betrays them once Protobot is dealt with and attacks and damages the EPF's HQ using a robot hydra made for the Medieval Party that he stole.

- A canonical ex-dictator. Don't believe me? Look up Operation: Blackout on the Club Penguin Wiki! He froze several agents during his reign of terror, was open to freezing innocent civilians, and also wanted to do away with puffles- the pets of penguins. He also banned several hobbies and professions during his reign (being a Ninja, a DJ, a Pirate, etc) for no reason other than disliking them. He also destroyed the EPF'S HQ and exposed two agents' private information to the public. This means Herbert is the first and only character to canonically dox people he doesn't like on Club Penguin.

-Was planning to bomb the EPF literally two months later with a hot sauce bomb (makes sense in context of the game and yes, it is more destructive than it sounds).

-Brainwashed puffles into digging coins for him purely because his henchman, Klutzy the crab brought a coin slot to use for his DIY heater, instead of just removing the coin slot and retooling it to work without one like a normal person."

[jerktournament]

Jerk Tournament FINALS

The final Jerk-down.

Remember the Golden Rule: Treat others the way you want to be treated.

Poll comes out January 8th at 12 AM EST.

🚨There's no right or wrong criteria for who to vote here because trying to establish that via Tumblrpoll is useless. 🚨 You can vote for someone because they're your favorite, because their propaganda swayed you, because they look cool, or because they're the meanest. Just think: Do You Want Them To Emerge Victorious? Or are they such an ass you'd delight in seeing them get swept? If you'd like a tournament with stricter rules feel free to take that into your own hands, I just like watching Tumblr users like ants.

And last but not least, be nice to other people on the internet. Anything attacking the fans or fandom of a character will be executed via crabs and potato.

Thanks for your patience and let the whooping continue.

Tag directory // Inbox, for propaganda, questions, chatter, etc.

Final matchup, in text:

GLaDOS (Portal) VS Herbert P. Bear (Club Penguin)

[jerktournament]

I’m giving the final 2 some popcorn to share

I agree! I will provide icees

[jerktournament]

Queen Chrysalis from mlp

Unfortunately we aren't accepting further submissions,but jerk public I call unto thee for judgement

Would she or would she not have slayed in the jerkpolls

slay

decay

Voting ended onDec 21, 2023

[jerktournament]

I think it’d be really funny to see a bear and a supercomputer fight

I think it’d also be funny for a bear to win against said supercomputer

Thought this was about Herbert vs AM and I was like yeah that'd be hilarious. And then I remembered miss GLaDOS and went oh that's funnier

[jerktournament]

ROUND FIVE - Murdoc Niccals (Gorillaz) VS Herbert P. Bear (Club Penguin)

JERK SEMIFINALS

Murdoc

Herbert

Voting ended onDec 26, 2023

!!! PROPAGANDA BELOW !!!

MURDOC: "I love him I’m so normal about him but he also hit someone with his car trying to rob a store and kidnapped one of his band mates and is just canonically a huuuge jerk even to his band mates especially to 2d"

HERBERT: "operation blackout would have been NOTHING without him (mostly because he caused it). he has a SOLAR LASER. this polar bear is an ass who literally harnessed the power of the sun and froze the top members of the elite penguin force (a group of penguin special agents) and his best friend is an equally villainous crab"

[extremelyputridfishbreath]

I know nothing about Murdoc, so I can't say anything for or against him. But I DO have a degree in pointing out Herbert is a jerk! Aaand since this is going to be decently long, it'll get a readmore! But for a TLDR...

Herbert antagonized actual players, who were likely children at the time on his official in character Twitter account.

Herbert stole a power source from an UFO and used it wreak havoc on the island.

Herbert kidnapped a musician and used her as leverage right before a charity drive concert just because he wanted to ban all music in exchange for her freedom. He was also planning to force penguins to donate to him instead of to charity during his dictatorship.

He literally doxxed two Elite Penguin Force agents to the entire island in game. No, I'm not joking; he posts their names and faces through the newspaper and exposes their secret identities to the public! ...And that was his successful attempt at forcibly outing agents to the public, since he was plotting to out all PSA agents but ultimately ended up failing to do that and instead pivoted to bombing them instead.

He took over Club Penguin and told penguins to leave, instead of leaving himself when he clearly hates penguins and their home.

Now, prefacing this with the following: Club Herbert's tweets were wiped post- Operation: Blackout (all but one announcing he was no longer planning to use Twitter anyway). But @clubherbert was very provably official. Thanks to clubpenguinmemories' blog, the header hasn't been lost to time!

(Source: cheatswhiz's post here)

As you can see, Herbert's none too kind to the very real players he's interacting with, huh?

And in this Medium article (which further goes into the real world marketing phenomenon that helped Operation: Blackout become one of the most memorable parties in the game's run to this day), we can see more surviving tweets from Herbert's now-defunct Twitter account. Of course, in the tweets compiled a few stand out to me especially...

Herbert: @club_gary Pipe down, pesky penguin.

(Note: @club_gary was not at any point an official account, despite being named similarly to Herbert's).

Herbert: @GrandeYoda You enjoy sunshine, do you? Well, that's too bad, because things are about to get DARK. #operationblackout

SO...these tweets are all in-character. Or at least, every surviving tweet is in fact, in character. Including the tweets directly antagonizing specific users, trying to intimidate them, and telling them to shut up. Now, I can't speak for EVERYONE... But I was seven when I first played the game, and while @clubherbert was still active, I was eleven! And I think it's a fair assessment to say most players were preteens, right? Which means that there is a nonzero chance that the vast majority of players who were talking to Herbert on his account and being heckled and told to shut up in return were probably kids too! And isn't that pretty jerky, telling them to shut up before he'd kidnap THEIR favorite characters and plunge their favorite MMO into darkness!?

SPEAKING of jerk-tier behavior...here comes yet another Herbert double-cross! In Operation: Crustacean, Herbert's minion Klutzy the crab is abducted by alien puffles.

(Source: Club Penguin Wiki, Operation: Crustacean's page)

Note that JPG speculates Herbert asking them for help is "probably a trap"- yet despite his reluctance, Herbert does still get help reuniting with Klutzy (albeit with the stipulation he is escorted onto the ship by the player).

(Source: Club Penguin Wiki, Operation: Crustcean's page)

(Source: clubpenguinmemories)

It should be noted that despite being abducted, Klutzy was completely unharmed and seemed to be enjoying his time with the alien puffles if the fact that we see him relaxing in the pool was any indication. Now, this would actually be a pretty decent reason for Herbert to be angry with someone for once. Even if the alien puffles didn't mean any harm taking Klutzy, considering Klutzy is Herbert's only friend it would be justified for him to chew them out for doing something like this and making him worried sick about his henchman. Does he tell these puffles to knock this off and never do this again?

Nope! The SECOND he knows Klutzy is safe, he steals the UFO's power source and bails using the escape pod, leaving the player to fix the ship themself.

(Source: clubpenguinmemories (linked above) and Club Penguin Wiki's Operation: Crustacean page) Operation: Crustacean...is actually one of the longest parties in the game. It started November 18th, 2015 and ended in February 3rd, 2016. That's 77 days, and the UFO was stranded for the entirety of it. And yeah, obviously the whole alien abduction thing isn't ideal, but considering you can literally adopt alien puffles and they'll happily follow you around and dig up coins and neat items for you, I think it's safe to say they were pretty friendly- even when players get abducted at random intervals, the only thing that happens to you is that you get a free tinfoil hat from it! These little guys just seem to be...very bad at making friends in a socially acceptable manner on Earth. And even if you dislike them, it's obviously pretty jerky to use their power source to torment penguins who had nothing to do with Klutzy's disappearance, like he did for the final EPF Operation, Operation: Tri-Umph.

(Source: Club Penguin Wiki)

He uses it to power his device (as pictured) to...shrink penguins and turn half of the Plaza (including the Mall and Pizza Parlor) grayscale. Yeah, it's...a party. But even if it's...something, compared to his other plans, it's still jerky because...you can't steal colors like that. And...shrinking people would be rude, if possible? Plus he does do it explicitly because shrinking penguins makes it significantly harder to stop them, and because penguins would want to leave a colorless island. ...Erm, ahem... * cough cough* ANYWAY.

(Source: Club Penguin Magazine Issue #37 - Diva-Napped!)

In this issue, Cadence and her fellow musician friends in The Penguin Band are planning to perform together to raise money for Coins for Change. Coins for Change was a in and out of universe donation drive. Club Penguin would donate to causes like providing money to protect the environment, help sick kids, providing toys and clothing for poor children, etc and players could 'donate' coins in game to participate. Let THAT sink in. Herbert is not only a dictator (who only isn't still in power because of the player being able to thwart him at the end of Operation: Blackout), but he would rather Coins for Change get less money without this charity concert than hear loud music ever again- in FACT...

(Source: Club Penguin Wiki, Club Penguin Times Issue #370)

If Operation: Blackout didn't end, or at the very least lasted long enough to continue throughout December 2012... Herbert was planning to force penguins to donate not to a charity drive like Coins for Change, but to him. Coins for Herbert, not for the change they wanted to see in the world. And hey, since it comes up in the issue this tidbit originates, for my last Herbert jerk moment of this post...

(Source: Club Penguin Wiki's Operation: Blackout page, Club Penguin Times issues #369 and 370) During his reign of terror, Herbert seized the moment to expose two agent's identities to the public. Dot and Jet Pack Guy, to be exact. It's worth noting that while JPG's issue (#370) went up the same day as his capture (November 22nd), so you could argue that he likely did not know he was outed as an agent by the time he was ambushed by Herbert's crabs, Dot's issue, (#369) went out three days before her capture (November 15th). It's very possible that she was aware Herbert had already exposed her before she was caught and frozen.

(Source: Club Penguin Wiki, Operation: Blackout's Interface page)

It's worth pointing out that in The Veggie Villain, the same PSA mission where Herbert bombs the Penguin Secret Agency with a popcorn bomb and successfully demolishes their HQ (and nearly killed Dot, Gary, the player, and Rookie, who narrowly escaped after Herbert locked down their HQ to prevent them from escaping), Herbert was planning to expose PSA agents identities because he was sick of them constantly trying to stop him from causing trouble for everyone.

(Source: Secret Penguin's Part 2 video to their Veggie Villain walkthrough)

Herbert was planning to expose all PSA agents, not just the ones who directly sabotaged his schemes like the player, Gary, Rookie, and JPG. All of them. The only reason he doesn't is because the player unplugs his computer...and he sends them back to the PSA HQ with the Popcorn Bomb instead.

(Source: clubpenguinmemories, Issue #370)

And as a closing note since hey, same issue as JPG being outed as an agent... Once again, I stress that Herbert doesn't leave out of his own selfishness. When he takes over, he expects penguins to leave their home because he not only hates them, but he doesn't want to risk ending up somewhere cold again (nevermind the fact he could simply use a map to navigate somewhere warm, or even stoaway on Rockhopper's ship since we know he travels to warmer islands and find a better place to live that way). And if that's not jerky, then I don't know what is!

So please...Vote Herbert.

[jerktournament]

ROUND FIVE - Murdoc Niccals (Gorillaz) VS Herbert P. Bear (Club Penguin)

JERK SEMIFINALS

Murdoc

Herbert

Voting ended onDec 26, 2023

!!! PROPAGANDA BELOW !!!

MURDOC: "I love him I’m so normal about him but he also hit someone with his car trying to rob a store and kidnapped one of his band mates and is just canonically a huuuge jerk even to his band mates especially to 2d"

HERBERT: "operation blackout would have been NOTHING without him (mostly because he caused it). he has a SOLAR LASER. this polar bear is an ass who literally harnessed the power of the sun and froze the top members of the elite penguin force (a group of penguin special agents) and his best friend is an equally villainous crab"

[toonirl]

H'okay, not gonna lie folks, we may be in for a hard one. IDK much about Gorillaz lore, but I do know the people that do probably outnumber us. But I won't let that stop me from giving y'all another

HERBERT P. BEAR CRIME OF THE WEEK

Hmm... okay Murdoc's got a kidnapping charge on him apparently, okay okay... yeah I think we can match that.

Voters, I give you this week's Ursine Offense: Grand Theft Puffle

(All images sourced from the Club Penguin Wiki)

Around 2013, Club Penguin introduced a feature called Puffle Digging, where players walking their pet Puffles could periodically collect free coins and items. And fresh of the heels of their success with Operation: Blackout (If you've been following this poll, you know what that is by now), what better way to re-bottle that lightning than by letting Herbert get his grubby little paws all over this feature.

(Images courtesy of TigerOfWind on YouTube)

Herbert hates -- well, literally everything related to Club Penguin tbh -- but relevant to our interests at the moment is Puffles. So what dastardly deed does he doll out to deprive the decent denizens of their darling domestic furball friends? That's right:

MIND CONTROL

(Image courtesy of LG on YouTube)

So why is Puffle Digging relevant to this, you may ask? Well, see that big heating device in the back there? For whatever reason, Herbert built it to be coin-operated.

Now I remember this being an oversight on Herbert's part but I'm sure one of the 5 other Club Penguin fans watching this poll can correct me if I'm wrong. But if I'm not, that means Herbert would rather subject a horde of innocent pets to forced, unending menial labor via brainwashing than remove an inconvenient feature from one of his own gadgets, and if that's not absolute cretinous behavior I'll eat my tiny hat. All just to heat his shitty apartment in a neighborhood he refuses to leave, mind you.

(UPDATE: I have been informed that the inclusion of the coin slot was in fact Klutzy's fault. Still doesn't give Herbert any excuse but at least we have the facts.)

(Image courtesy of the Club Penguin Wiki)

Also can we look at the obstacles you have to pass to reach his computer terminal for a second?

(Images courtesy of LJ on YouTube)

MAJOR Fire hazard. Sir, you are underground what - and I quote - the fuck?

Imagine if one of those Puffles or, heaven forbid, Klutzy tried to escape through that vent. Bitch would probably just sit there complaining about the smell of burnt hair like the actual pasty toot he is.