"I'm Dorothy Gale from Kansas"
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@jet-engine
Finally posted my "PokeSquad" sequel, "Shadows of Orre." It'll somewhat follow the story of Gale of Darkness, except it includes Ash, Wes, and Ella (OC) in the place of Michael.
I'm taking a lot of creative liberties with this fic. Also, don't expect regular updates.
Fanfiction
AO3
Chapter Five of "Tales of the Foundation" involves The Haberdasher learning something Heinz really didn't want him to learn. Meanwhile, Perry and Pinky help the kids make giant popcorn.
Trigger Warning: suicidal ideation (pre-story) and self-hatred
Fanfiction
AO3
Two days after Chapter Three of "Tales from the Foundation," we have Chapter Four because it is very short and I was very into it. Merely a Perryshmirtz blurb in which the two have a serious conversation about how their queerplatonic relationship will be going forward.
Fanfiction
AO3
Chapter Three of "Tales from the Foundation" is a short little blurb in which Perry has a heart-to-heart with Candace about busting.
Fanfiction
AO3
The website I use to access my pay stubs was down for a week for maintenance. Now we have to download this app for a MFA login, and everyone was complaining about how hard it was or how it just plain wasn't working. Naturally, I was pretty nervous to make my own attempt, but...it was fine? Took me two minutes? Why is everyone else having so much trouble?
Reading enemies to lovers reminds him of his nemesis
Insta
I was suddenly inspired by this:
Human!Perryshmirtz One-Shot: The Book
It was a quiet Sunday afternoon, the kind of day that stretched lazily across the hours. Perry was finally relaxing at home. He had already double-checked his schedule (just in case he had even asked Carl to confirm it). Today was his official day off. There were no missions, no gadgets, and no sliding through secret doors to receive assignments. It was just Perry. His hair was down, unstyled in his comfortable civilian clothes: a loose shirt, khaki shorts, and his glasses perched neatly on his nose; his posture carried none of the sharp discipline he maintained while acting as Agent P.
Today, he wasn’t an agent. He was simply boring Uncle Perry.
The day had been slow and relaxing, almost too slow. He soon found himself restless, a little bored, and with nothing urgent to occupy his mind. After pacing around the living room, he decided to pick up a few books Linda had snagged at a garage sale. She had recommended them with a mischievous giggle, insisting they were “surprisingly entertaining.” Perry wasn’t sure what to expect, but he trusted her taste enough to give them a try.
The covers were delightfully retro, each one painted with a handsome protagonist in some dramatic pose. One featured a blonde sailor tangled in the grip of a monstrous tentacle. “No.” Another promised a space adventure, the hero brandishing a laser gun against a backdrop of stars. “Nope.” A third showed a masked cowboy. “Mmm, maybe.”
The last one caught his eye: a spy thriller. Its cover featured two men standing back-to-back; one in a smoking jacket, the other in a dark suit with an eyepatch. The synopsis promised a nemesis tale full of passion and espionage. “Meh, why not?” Perry thought, amused by the idea of seeing how an author imagined a spy's life to be. He settled into the sofa with the novel in hand.
To his surprise, the book was... engaging. It wasn’t just the action, though there was plenty of that, but the subtler details. The protagonist, a seasoned, handsome spy, had a complicated relationship with his nemesis, an eccentric scientist bent on revenge against the people who had wronged him. Their battles were fierce, but beneath the arguments and schemes, Perry noticed something else: tension. Romantic tension. The kind that simmered under sharp words and long stares.
By the time he was halfway through, Perry was completely absorbed in a particularly intense scene. The spy had cornered the scientist, their fight escalating until the agent growled, “Just give up. I can’t let you destroy this place. They hurt you, I know… but they don’t value you the way they should.”
The scientist faltered, his guard slipping. “I cannot do that… I don’t know what it’s like. to be provided by affection.”
The agent’s voice softened. “Then I’ll show you.” The agent pulled the scientist close and kissed him with desperate passion. The scientist clutched him back, equally frantic, equally vulnerable.
And suddenly, Perry’s mind conjured an image: the spy and the scientist blurred into him and Doofenshmirtz.
Wait. What?
WAIT. Why was he thinking that?!
He found himself flushing brilliant red. His relationship with Doof wasn’t like that. Sure, they bantered. Sure, they fought. And yes, over the years, they had grown closer in ways Perry hadn’t expected.
But romantic? No. Absolutely not. He couldn't picture them like that... Could he?
Except his mind traitorously filled in the blanks anyway. He imagined grappling with Heinz, like they usually did during a fight, feeling the man's warmth as they both panted for air, their faces inches apart. He imagined grabbing Heinz by the lapels of his lab coat and pulling him into a kiss with that same intensity. He pictured Doof responding, hands tangled in Perry's hair, their closeness undeniable. The thought of leaning in, tasting him.
Perry’s face burned crimson. Oh, sweet mother of muffin. He dropped the book onto his lap and buried his face in his hands, utterly mortified by his own imagination.
“Uncle Perry? Are you okay?”
His head snapped up. Candace was standing behind the sofa, her brow furrowed in concern. He waved his hand quickly, giving her a strained smile to signal that everything was perfectly fine. She shrugged, easily distracted, and turned back to her phone. “Yeah, Stacy, I’m totally going to bust them next week...”
Perry exhaled shakily, staring down at the cover of the spy novel. Maybe... maybe he should switch to the cowboy book instead, just to scrub those thoughts from his brain.
Spoiler alert: It did not help. At all.
I have hit two home owner milestones in the past month.
The first was having to pick up dog poop off my front lawn. No, I don't have a dog.🤬
The second happened yesterday, or at least that's when I noticed it. There's a porch light attached to the wall directly beside my front door, and there's an awning over my front porch. So, of course a bird decided that this could be a good place to build a nest. I just happened to look up while checking the mail - my mailbox is attached to the wall directly beneath this porch light - and saw a bundle of sticks and thought, "Oh, shit." Fortunately, there were no birds around and no eggs in the nest, so I just tossed the thing in the trash. Idk if I got lucky or if the bird changed their mind and abandoned the thing. Either way, I'm going to be checking that spot every time I go outside for a while. Just in case...
The bird's not giving up, so I made a contraption. We'll see how it goes.
My contraption seems to be working. No new nests have sprung up. Gonna keep my eyes peeled.
I just learned something. There's this thing called compulsory heterosexuality, and it's when a gay or aro/ace person tries to force themself to have a crush on the opposite sex because they feel like that's what's supposed to happen with opposite sex people they enjoy being around.
Bruh, I did this with no less than three of my guy friends in middle/high school because I thought not being attracted to girls automatically meant I was straight! My brain is exploding!🤯
I have hit two home owner milestones in the past month.
The first was having to pick up dog poop off my front lawn. No, I don't have a dog.🤬
The second happened yesterday, or at least that's when I noticed it. There's a porch light attached to the wall directly beside my front door, and there's an awning over my front porch. So, of course a bird decided that this could be a good place to build a nest. I just happened to look up while checking the mail - my mailbox is attached to the wall directly beneath this porch light - and saw a bundle of sticks and thought, "Oh, shit." Fortunately, there were no birds around and no eggs in the nest, so I just tossed the thing in the trash. Idk if I got lucky or if the bird changed their mind and abandoned the thing. Either way, I'm going to be checking that spot every time I go outside for a while. Just in case...
The bird's not giving up, so I made a contraption. We'll see how it goes.
I have hit two home owner milestones in the past month.
The first was having to pick up dog poop off my front lawn. No, I don't have a dog.🤬
The second happened yesterday, or at least that's when I noticed it. There's a porch light attached to the wall directly beside my front door, and there's an awning over my front porch. So, of course a bird decided that this could be a good place to build a nest. I just happened to look up while checking the mail - my mailbox is attached to the wall directly beneath this porch light - and saw a bundle of sticks and thought, "Oh, shit." Fortunately, there were no birds around and no eggs in the nest, so I just tossed the thing in the trash. Idk if I got lucky or if the bird changed their mind and abandoned the thing. Either way, I'm going to be checking that spot every time I go outside for a while. Just in case...
Chapter Two of "Tales from the Foundation" is a look into the past, specifically Junie laying two eggs and how she and Brutus reacted when only Perry's hatched.
Fanfiction (to be added)
AO3
I have officially posted the sequel to "A Platypus in a Fedora." It's a one-shot series titled "Tales from the Foundation." In chapter one, a wake is held for all of OWCA's fallen agents, and Perry goes missing...as per usual.
Fanfiction
AO3
With the epilogue, we conclude "A Platypus in a Fedora." Preparations for Perry and Monogram's non-profit are underway, and Heinz has a surprise for Perry.
Fanfiction
AO3
Thank you, everyone who read this, and be on the lookout for the sequel! It's gonna be a one-shot collection about how everyone's lives have changed after the events of this story. See you then!
Final chapter of "A Platypus in a Fedora," not counting the epilogue! Heinz recruits Major Monogram to snap Perry out of his funk. How does it go? Read to find out!
Fanfiction
AO3
One of my favorite things in Phineas and Ferb is that they constantly introduce insane stuff and never elaborate simply by saying "Don't ask" (ex: Doofenshmirtz having a glass window of him kicking an orange, Buford having a Candace-suit named Beatrice, the list goes on.)
And sure, that's something a lot of TV shows, books or other pieces of media also do, but they do it constantly and even more astounding, it lands every freaking time.
We don't need to know why Major Monogram dressed up as a clown to give Carl a massage when it wasn't part of the bet, nor literally anything about Marty the Rabbit Boy and His Musical Blender. We just need to enjoy it.
Im sure Perry the Platypus the most clingy person ever with his family and couple of friends but in public he cold brick who do not show his cuddle addiction even under a gun.
Laughing because I didn't realize this was my headcanon until I found this post. I even had multiple instances of this in my fic, "A Platypus in a Fedora." The man is stone-cold, yet he also hugged his parents every time he visited them and later cuddled with his mom when I killed off his father. Later, Pinky was depressed and rethinking his life choices, and Perry did not hesitate to crawl into bed with him and just hold him. And before that, Perry hugged Doof's leg in a fit of excitement and Doof basically bluescreened. Seriously, how did I not know that my headcanon for Perry was "get away from me unless snuggle-worthy?"
