great at sex

[joncrate]

I'm only on Tumblr for the chicks and street cred.

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The best YouTube ads are mattress companies because you know they ain't paying extra for an unskippable ad

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Jesus Christ this is keep your bread in the fuckin fridge weather

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"Can just get...BEYOND Thunderdome" boyfriend vs "This movie is just ropes and asses" girlfriend

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Out: saying two things that go together are like peanut butter and jelly

In: saying two things that go together are like Jake and the Fatman

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Brave Fencer Musashi as he's about to get stepped on by a giant: oh shit

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Exasperated dad: oh what new fresh hell is this

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Man who was just about to sit down: oh what the fuck is it now

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50 decks, 17 card poker, best 20 card hand wins

[joncrate]

Dr. Don heard Grant MacDonald and said, that but family friendly.

[joncrate]

Finally started on the new season of X-Men '97. I'm like two minutes in and have my first nitpick. So Bishop goes to the past, and Forge goes to the future, because Forge wants to go where Storm is. But this is not a logical choice. Bishop should go to the future because 1) he is way more familiar with future tech, and 2) his mutant power is way more effective in a time where energy weapons are everywhere.

Not a complaint, by the way. Just the characters not making a good choice. It could play out that way.

[joncrate]

Just to clarify my stances. I am incredibly happy for Alex Kister getting a movie deal. Good for him, and I'm never going to begrudge a regular Joe from getting his money.

I am 60/40 on this translating to the big screen. It's easy to look at the early videos and say, yeah this isn't it fam. But his stuff has only gotten better in quality, and Alex knows the story he wants to tell, so he himself gets the benefit of the doubt.

I absolutely DO NOT have faith in the big studio to not interfere and butcher the whole thing. I just don't. A24 had an excellent reputation for strange movies and letting the directors and writers create, so I had a ton of faith in Backrooms.

And I get it. You tell someone that they get to work with Steven Spielberg, how can they say no? Trust me, I completely understand that this is an offer you can't refuse. I just hope Alex has it in his contract that he has the vast majority of control and decision-making.

We are entering a new era here people. It's hard for me to believe that the studios will take away the proper lessons from Backrooms, Obsession, and Iron Lung. They love to tell us what we should like. Just keep your hope duct-taped together.

[joncrate]

Before the season, I never said the White Sox would be good. But I did tell everyone that I talk baseball with that the division was wide open and they had a very interesting collection of players that I kinda liked. Then Murakami teed off in spring training and I instantly fell in love with his swing.

I didn't say the White Sox would be good. But I still feel vindicated in a way.

[joncrate]

The gyro truck at the street fair puts my falafel to shame. They even make it in tater tot form. And I only get lamb like twice a year.

[joncrate]

Theory: Ivan Beck is based on Anatoli Bugorski.

[joncrate]

So one of the null zones in the Backrooms leads to John Malkovich's head, right?

[joncrate]

I feel like this flavor was made specifically for me. It is the taste of my childhood.

My grandmother and mother would always find ways to use the rhubarb that would grow up the side of my parents' brick rambler every summer. At first it was just rhubarb pie, but they quickly started adding other fruits. Apple, blueberry, cherry, and of course strawberry rhubarb were always in the fridge in the form of cakes, crisps, and cobbler.

My parents have since moved to a condo and don't have access to free rhubarb, ha. But it defined what dessert was to me as a child. Don't give me sweet, give me tart.

And it all just hit me when I saw this ice cream flavor. It is a gem and I highly recommend it.