i only came for the cake @joshdwilder - Tumblr Blog

rossnoble:

“At what point do you accept that you’re no longer jet lagged but you’re just a lazy bastard who has watched every episode of Rick and Morty twice since coming to Connecticut?” Ross groaned, trying to find the motivation to do anything other than sit there, motionless. He had done a lot of that, since coming to the States, so far. “Asking for a friend, obviously.” He added, a small grin tugging at his lips - there was no way he wanted to be known as the guy who hung around moping or looking miserable, after all. That had never been his way.

“I mean, you don't have to accept anything you could let me live vicariously through you, stay in denial and watch all five seasons of Community.” Josh chuckled as he encouraged the lazy behavior mostly because he couldn’t remember that last time he’d had a day off or even one just to himself.

#ross

magnolia-sawyer:

“A scene? In the middle of the store? Was she a member of Jersey Shore or something?” Magnolia wrinkled her nose, shaking her head slowly. “Wow. The break up must have been really messy. Right? Like you don’t have to say hi to an old friend, there’s a reason why they are your old friend.”

“I don’t know what to tell ya, hood folks just act like that, and I can say that cause I’m from there anyone else says it they’re gonna catch this fade that’s just how it is,” Josh explained with a shrug of his shoulders. “It wasn’t necessarily a bad break up I just told her her cousin Bootsie owed me money and she just started “Aren’t you making your own paper, you in the pros what you need money from him for,” and I was just like, “Girl if he owes me money he owes that ain’t got nothin’ to do with you,” and she was all “The fuck is you talkin’ to me like that for Dishon,” Like she could just call me out my name like that and then it just snowballed from there so technically it was my ultimately my fault but still people can’t just goin’ around throwin’ boxes of donuts at people and then getting banned from the grocery store for no reason.”

#magnolia

eleanor-shellstrop

#the inner workings of a black man

magnolia-sawyer:

“I hate running into people I haven’t seen in a while at the supermarket. Like, don’t talk to me. Why is this happening? When has catching up in the middle of the potato chip aisle ever been a good idea?”

“I feel you. I ran into an ex’s once and she caused a scene in the middle of the store. Ended up having a box of donuts chucked at me for legitimately no reason. Why can’t people have manners and just pretend like they don’t see ya and walk the other way?”

#magnolia

nadiacarmichael:

Nadia seemed to have no regard for whatever the other person was busy doing before roughly (especially for a person of her stature) tugging their arm towards her, “You need to help me!” Her distressed and panicked demeanor would lead one to believe she was being chased by a trashy slasher movie villain, however, she wasn’t. “I lost my earring! You have to help me this is an emergency.”

It took a full minute for Josh to process what exactly was happening. One minute he’d had his nose buried in his phone answering a few emails here and there and the next this small girl had a vice grip on his bicep. He’d barely even had time to show concern before the sheer idiocy of her distress hit his ears. “I’ma need you to get the hell up off me.” He told her seriously before pulling his arm from her grip. “Do you know the definition of an emergency cause that sure as hell ain’t it.”

#nadia

sashadaniiels:

Under the tones of the music, Sasha could hear a bit of whispering but couldn’t make anything out until a few familiar giggles hit her ears and she felt a tiny body crash and clung to her leg causing the girl to stagger in place just briefly. “Oh, Kenz!” She laughed as she looked down at the little girl and set aside the object in her hands to pick the girl up hugging her tightly. “How’s my favorite little terror?” She teased as she set the girl down on the counter and looked at Josh with a grin. “It’s fine. You just pick her up from Kat’s?” She asked before the little girl called for her attention once more.

“Don’t call her a little terror.” Josh chastised lightly though it was all in good humor. Despite his better judgment he picked up one of the cupcakes and took a bite knowing the woman always made extras anyway. “I can eat this, right?” He asked her mouth full, just to push his luck but couldn’t stop the chuckle that bubbled up in his throat and ended up coughing as he choked a bit on the treat.

#sasha

matildaacarter:

Tilly knew that her phone conversation had probably appeared strange to a person standing nearby. “The word vagina is literally just a word, the correct word,” she mused, “though for some reasons adults think that it’s a danger word or some shit.” She smiled as he mentioned his own daughter, “Noemie’s only at camp for a week, I couldn’t handle that whole summer thing,” she admitted, “how old is your daughter?”

“Adults tend to overreact to everything which on one hand I sort of understand, sometimes we can’t help it, but on the other hand, it gets to be a little ridiculous.” He mused chuckling softly and cleared his throat. “She’s four and I can barely handle that sometimes. It’s like yesterday she was a baby and couldn’t do anything but cry and be cute and now she does actual human things now, like walk and talk and that’s not a new thing but it still blows me away so obviously the thought of her getting older just freaks me out but it’s inevitable.”

#tilly

sashadaniiels:

“Just because the lights are on, and the door is unlocked, does not mean the sign says we’re open,” Sasha spoke after she heard the bell at the top of the door ding underneath the gentle melodious tones of the old school R&B jams she let play over the shops sound system, since she was the only one there at the moment, alerting the that someone had entered the Bakery, but didn’t look up to see whom it was. Instead, she kept her eyes trained on the task at hand and cupcakes in front of her, as she decorated the last of them with icing.

A smirk made its way onto Josh’s lips as he heard the words and help Kenz through the door and crouched down to whisper in her ear, “Go get Aunt Luci.” and stood back up as he watched as the little girl ran around the counter and flung herself against the older female hugging her leg tightly and giggling. “Hey be careful now.” He warned the child grin firmly planted on his lips. “Sorry Luc, we were walking by and she wanted to say hi.”

#sasha

matildaacarter:

Tilly hung up the phone with an apologetic look to the person beside her. “Sorry, that was my daughter’s camp,” she explained, “apparently today she taught her fellow campers the word vagina.” Tilly’s face broke into a soft smile, “and now they are saying I should reprimand her, it’s the anatomically correct word, she’s spreading knowledge and awareness, I feel proud.”

A subtle chuckle slipped from the man's lips as he listened to the blonde and shook his head. “Those councellors are definitely being a little overly cautious. There’s nothing wrong with children knowing the word vagina, maybe they think it’s a gateway to bigger conversations? I don’t know.” He shrugged and let out another little laugh. “Not gonna lie, I am not lookin’ forward to my daughter reaching camp age. It’s comin’ up close though.”