JSPaint

literally only use this blog to post the shit i think of during school and therapy. im asexual i dont want to fuck anything no matter what i might say

[jspaint]

“average horror podcast mentions 3 Michael’s per episode” factoid actually just statistical error. average horror podcast mentions 0 Michael’s per episode. The Magnus Archives, who has at least 6 Michaels in canon & mentions them over 10,000 times per episode, is an outlier and should not have been counted

[fartofthesunrise]

Gougar tribute video

[jspaint]

rip penelope scott but i’d give the satan a blowjob

[jspaint]

busting it down on tha stripper pole to Roblox Meep City The Playground Theme (Night Time) like lets go babyyyyy sex music

[themkultra]

The three most important things about being a wizard is 1. Being an absolute cunt and 2. Having lots of gay sex

[pikachu-ate-you]

What’s the third most important thing?

[themkultra]

3. MAGIC MISSILE

[jspaint]

Hey babe do you use biodegradable pads for yo pussy? 

[pukicho]

Doctor: $140,000 a year

Furry artist on Patreon: $160,000 a year

[trilllizard666]

i think you’re lowballing the furry art amount tbh

[pukicho]

I’m sorry for the inaccuracies, Doctor Yiff

[trilllizard666]

no matter how I respond to this I don’t look good, well played. i walked right into that

[boobachu]

Well, furry artists are typically more competent and courteous than your average doctor, so I can see that.

[pukicho]

Did you just legitimately tell me that a person who draws wolf ass is more competent than a dude who spent 8+ years in a university to give you your lung transplant?

[hieronymus-botch]

doctors are bullshit and furry artists perform an infinitely more valuable service to society compared to them

[pukicho]

You will die in 7 days

[hokuto-ju-no-ken]

It took doctor’s like 10 years to diagnose what was wrong with me, some insisting I was faking for attention while a furry artist I knew just went “that sounds like crohn’s” after hearing me complain once and ended up being right

Also I can’t go to a doctor and ask them to draw Rouge the Bat wider than she is tall with tits to match, now can I

[kolbye]

You could if you weren’t a fucking coward

[cardinalcringe]

I think you may also be underestimating the overlap between doctors and furries.

[madastowa]

IT’S ON MY DASH IT’S ON MY DASH THE ORIGINAL IS ON MY DASH

[dudeiwannasleep]

ew, you spell the main character of tma’s name with an h?? it’s “te arcivist,” get it right 🙄🙄

[leoreturns-deactivated20110811]

I have been waiting all year to post this.

[tumboner]

omg

[merspers]

This has been in my queue for months.

[mcgooglykins]

I missed it last year and I vowed that would NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.

[thatsoundsprettynice]

YES

[xbstnmnr-deactivated20241116]

omg i didnt reblog this last year!

[jspaint]

Peace signs? No. HATE SIGNS. I WANT TO BE ABLE TO SHOW MY ANGER IN A SIMPLE GESTURE. 

[threewayradio-deactivated202005]

Why would you fuck Adam sandler

it was on my bucket list 

[bee-enthusiast]

Does the ‘was’ entail you already have?

[threewayradio-deactivated202005]

yes

[afloweroutofstone]

Top 25 Tumblr post

[4444555666777888999]

I have searched everywhere for this I almost thought I hallucinated it

[jspaint]

The FitnessGram™ Pacer Test is a multistage aerobic capacity test that progressively gets more difficult as it continues. The 20-meter pacer test will begin in 30 seconds. Line up at the start. The running speed starts slowly but gets faster each minute after you hear hello jon apologies for the deception

[magnus-institute-break-room]

It turns out that Mike Crew is a very charming man. I contacted him about my ceiling and he came over personally! We had a cuppa, and we have a date planned next week at some sort of terrace? Apparently it has a great view.

[jspaint]

Good to hear everything seems like it will work out! =)  I’m sure he’s lovely 

[magnus-institute-break-room]

i’ve been waking up earlier and earlier, and i swear my ceiling is getting farther away each day. i didn’t notice at first, but now it’s significant. the walls have even started to crack a bit. who do you think i should contact about this?

[jspaint]

Personally I think a man by the name of Mike Crew would be helpful, not really sure where one would find him though- it’s probably not a big deal anyways ! 😁

[magnus-institute-break-room]

thank you! i looked up ‘Mike Crew’ in the institute database and found some files on him from the archives! i’m going to send him an email right away!

[jspaint]

Ah! I didn’t realize he was on file, good luck with that 

[magnus-institute-break-room]

i’ve been waking up earlier and earlier, and i swear my ceiling is getting farther away each day. i didn’t notice at first, but now it’s significant. the walls have even started to crack a bit. who do you think i should contact about this?

[jspaint]

Personally I think a man by the name of Mike Crew would be helpful, not really sure where one would find him though- it’s probably not a big deal anyways ! 😁

[jonsfortyfiftheye]

NO LITTLE GERMAN BOY DON’T GO INTO THE LONELY

oh mein gotten zis beach is full of foggensadden

[hellofriendhawke]

I would love if at some point in ofmd, the crew realizes they have to do something with Izzy and Stede is reluctant to kill him but everyone agrees that if they let Izzy go he'll just come back with a convoluted plan to kill them all. So they basically keep him as a reluctant member of the crew but he's like a cat who constantly tries to run out the front door when you open it. They wake up some nights and he's trying to set the ship on fire and sail away in a dinghy but they're just like 'Ooooh silly little Izzy is out of his pen again. someone catch him and put him in his room ❤️.'