the swag messiah @juggalohidan - Tumblr Blog

“hey did you kiss the brick before you threw it” “prev so true” “EXACTLY!!!” “I am always saying this” “op im gonna kill myself” “dont talk to me im unwell about this” “agskhksj!!!"

Im about to post something risky and being the friend thats too woke but you cant really "stop" having a special interest and its ableist to expect autistic people to do so. What people often conflate with "stopping" a special interest is spending money on it and engaging in consumerism but trust me if i could stop having a special interest or redirect them i wouldnt be posting about fucking naruto in 2026 and i just have to thank the autism gods daily i didnt get something not socially or otherwise unacceptable or harmful. I get the sentiment but its really not how it works in my experience and understanding

#Good for you if you can redirect or stop it but there is no off from the autism train...#Sorry not to vague but i didnt want to walk into enemy territory but i really think its ironic how autism spaces circled back to the same #Kind of playground ableism they once were against. No i cant stop my brain from having a lexical knowledge of all garfield facts for exampl #And i know some of my special interests are creepy or even kinda wrong (like dictatures) but i cant really unwill them from my mind lol #I know everyone means well but wanted to put my two cents there/offer my perspective #If you see this dear moot this isnt against you and i just didnt want to barge into your notes with my hot take #The original post just rubbed me the wrong way and its not even about harry potter but in general #About people misunderstanding special interests #They may fade or shift but its largely out of my control #Like a big part of restrictive interests is the impairment they cause in functioning etc #Probably higher functioning people have less trouble with it or idk but there IS an impairment there bc of your inability to shift focus to #Other more adaptive and useful things

lilac-bramble

A bit more of Hidan’s interior architecture… I was hoping the fan vaulting in the background would read a bit like a Jashin symbol…

#NOOOO INO THERE IS A COGNITOHAZARD BEHIND YOU INOOOO (screaming walter white)

#Hidan is the op... No kakuzu doesnt know about it

I just sorta wish my brain stopped using naruto characters to convey deep spiritual messages to me because this is the 3rd time in the last 2 years

#I dont even mention these to the psych its just part of my normative experience by now i guess

Visually jashin was represented by a red nebula that had pulsing bone/teeth/organs and it was like a cognitohazard. if you looked at it you became cognizant of all the suffering and pain in the world happening at the same time, from all point of views, the hunger of a predator, the fear of the prey, the pain, then relief of dying and being born and how its all meaningless, and how you can only escape all the suffering by dying and killing and eating. so at the same time it was this force of nature thing and the hopelessness of survival for the sake of survival. Which goes crazy hard for a stupid dream about naruto

#i apologize hidan. jashin was metal as hell and i would worship it too. i wasnt familiar with your game #jashin was a neutral/benevolent entity btw. it wanted to kill you because it loved you like a parent.#i just wish this all came to me in some different form and not as part of a fucking naruto dream #it would be such an amazing oc or something and now its the fucking naruto god im so pissed. i hate my brain lmfao #what melatonin a prescribed sleeping pill 3 herbal supplements and magnesium supplements will do to you

Another interesting part of tje dream was that hidan was a lot younger than in canon (not older than 14) and a participant in the chuunin exam (but still a member of akatsuki) so the entire time he was like

while ino was losing her mind about the cosmic force/elder god of nature and destruction and suffering she saw in there

Got woken up by a dream at 2 am-ish about chuunin exam era ino peeking into hidans brain with mind transfer, seeing jashin as a cosmic horror entity and losing her mind then becoming a jashin believer who starts a killing spree in the forest. She has to be restrained in konoha because she wants to leave the village to spread jashinism and wants to find hidan.

#Ino had a really cool rant about jashin that keeps haunting me #My dream had a whole scene about how yamanaka need to be old enough to be mentally strong enough to withstand a mind like hidans