Between Faith and Desire | MellodraMattic
Religious guilt, Anal, Oral, begging, cigarettes, alcohol, AU Catholic University, use of prayer during sex, sexual activity
Saint John’s University was super strict about curfew throughout the year, except for the one night that led into the weekend when the warden was away. Campus security let students do just about anything they wanted, no curfew. It was Mello’s second year, so he already knew the party would be halfway between the girls' and boys' schools in the forest. He left his cluttered dorm and walked into the union. It was busy with students, some still in uniform from last period. The party was in a couple of hours, so he had time to chill out. He saw Matt, one of the ones in uniform, he’s a first-year that had been selling answers for a few classes or just straight out doing the work himself. Mello had found himself using Matt as a crutch for his Technology class, so they had grown familiar with one another.
Mello sat himself down next to Matt, “If it's not my favorite first year, going to the party tonight, Matt?” He asked, kicking his feet up on the table in front of the couch they sat on.
Matt looked confused, “Umm, yeah, the one with the girls' school?” He asked, Mello nodded, “That's the one.”
Matt really didn’t want to go; it would be loud, and when had he ever been interested in girls? The one he was any sort of interested in would be the man sitting next to him. “Do you even drink?” Mello asked, Matt nodded, “On occasion, I’m a heavy smoker though.” Matt answered
Mello hummed, “I figured you to be some goody two shoes, or something.” The man said. Matt loosened his tie, “Maybe you don’t know much about me then.” Mello hummed again, that god damn hum was going to put Matt in an early grave. “What’s that face for, first-year?” Mello asked.
Matt quickly fixed his face, “I have no idea what you're talking about.” Mello laughed, “Sure you don’t, I’ll see you at the party then.” With that he was up and gone in a few seconds. Matt groaned in his hands before going up to his own door. It was messy, with wrappers everywhere that he had yet to clean up. He powered up his console and started playing some racing game.
Around 9:30 he started getting ready for the party, he put on a long sleeve black and white sweater, and a pair of jeans. Nothing fancy, he didn’t want to over dress. He took a good look at himself in his bathroom mirror. He went outside and took a smoke break then started towards the party.
☠︎︎♱✮♱༻¨*:·༺ ♱✮♱༻·:*¨༺☠︎︎
The party was near full function when Mello got there. Thick trees with fairy lights wrapped up in the branches for subtle lighting. The girls' school had managed to set up. A small fire pit provides more lighting and also a little warmth for the nearby couples making out on hay bales surrounding it. Music was being played from some speakers where a horde of students was dancing. Playing some club remix version of Moves Like Jagger by Maroon 5 that made it sound like robots would soon take over. Mello made his way to the drinks table, where he just poured random things into a green solo cup. Some game with them per color, green was ‘It's complicated’. They did this last year, too. Mello mistakenly took a yellow cup for ‘single’, and people would not leave him alone. He enjoyed some of the attention, but it was quickly overwhelming.
The air was thick with the sick scent of smoke and alcohol. Mello looked over at the fire pit, seeing a few couples making out. They didn’t intrigue him, he was looking for someone very specific.
He looked around and spotted Matt with a yellow cup, just about 4 girls around him. Matt out of uniform, something rare out of the first-years. Mello wore his uniform to the party last year. Matt looked uncomfortable with the attention. Mello snickered and made his way over. “Hey,” He said, announced himself. Matt looked goddamn near relieved. “I was looking for you.” Matt said. Mello put on a polite smile, “Sorry, ladies, I’ll have to pull him away for now.” Mello said, pulling Matt away.
They made their way to a couple of homemade beer pong tables that were poorly made out of sheets of plywood. “You didn’t have to do that.” Matt said. “What? Save you from being harassed all night?” Mello asked, scoffing and taking Matt’s cup and chugging what was left in it before throwing it in a trash bin. “Hey-” Matt started, but Mello shoved his own cup in his hand. “Never grab yellow.” Mello said. Matt just blinked at him, not knowing if he should be putting Mello in his place or not.
On one hand, Matt wanted to finish his own damn drink; on the other, he was enjoying watching Mello act like some savior. All the argument bit off in his throat, however, when Mello looked at him again. Not just looked at him but saw him. Mello’s lips grew into an almost conceited smirk. “What's that for?” Matt asked. Mello looked out at the party, “Nothing, I guess, you just look a little… tense.” The way tense rolled off his tongue as though it could possibly be amusing for him pissed Matt off. Matt rolled his eyes. “Easy, first-year.” Mello said.
Matt rolled his eyes again, “Why do you feel the need to call me that?” He asked, taking a sip of the concoction Mello had handed him. Mello shrugged with a dismissive shrug, “That’s what you are, I guess.” Mello answered. “Do you even know my name? Because it feels like you don’t know my name.” Matt said, partly teasing.
Mello gave him a crooked look, “Of course I know your name, Matt. You don’t like nicknames or something?” Matt glanced out to the party, “Just making sure.” He mumbled, it went quiet for a beat. Well as quiet as it could get with the blaring music.
Matt cleared his throat, “Why don’t we play a game, huh?” He offered, pointing at a since-abandoned beer pong table. Mello walked over to the far side. “Fine, but you asked for this.”
This wasn’t in the slightest fair, Matt had never even really played this game, it took him a second but by the second round he had gotten a hang of things. “Not so bad after all then.” Mello teased him as Matt scored on him. Mello grimaced as the shot slid down his throat. “You had the upper hand, I’d never played this game before tonight.” Matt challenged. “You wanted to play, first-year.” Mello said. They started subbing in the shots for some off brand soda.
They played 4 times, resulting in a tie. “Again.” Matt said, desperate to prove himself. Both stumbling slightly, Mello walked over, “No, that's enough, next time.” He said, starting to walk away. “Where are you going?” Matt asked.
Mello turned around, “Back to my dorm.” He answered, “Can I come with?” Matt asked before he could stop himself. “You need me to hold your hand, too? Come on.” He teased.
The walk up was peaceful, Matt listened to Mello's slightly heavier breathing from having to walk so far back. They got onto campus after what felt like 10 minutes of walking. “You live in Carey Hall?” Matt asked as they walked towards the building. Mello smiled, “It’s the sophomore building, Matt.” He answered obviously. It went quiet again.
“You know what, you're cool, Matt.” Mello said, walking into Carey Hall. “Yeah, what gives you that kind of certification?” Matt teased.
Mello thought for a moment, “Well, I’m like the king of hand jobs here, my first year I did what you do, but... sexually.” Matt choked a little, “Excuse me, what now? Those are not exactly comparable.” He was a little red in the face. Mello just laughed, “20 dollars is 20 dollars. 35 for oral.” He teased Matt.
Matt’s full face was red now. They started walking up the stairs. Mello fell, and Matt caught him, “Mello.” He said, now face-to-face. They were both slightly panting. “Sorry, first year, didn’t mean to spook you.” Mello whispered, like he was scared to break the newfound tension. It was heavy and thick, making it hard to keep control of any breath they had. Matt’s eyes flickered down to Mello’s slightly parted lips, and he licked his own ever so slightly. He was shaking.
Mello returned the gesture, “Are you okay?” Matt asked like Mello was about to die right in front of him. “I’m diabetic, I think I’m having a sugar crash.” Mello’s voice was shaky, too. Matt helped him up and wrapped Mello’s arm around his neck, “Put your weight on me.” Matt said softly. “You can’t lift me and you both up the stairs.” Mello said. Matt rolled his eyes, “I could just leave you here, I guess. Let the rats find you.” Matt said.
Mello huffed but did anyway, it was a struggle but Matt did get them up to Mello’s door. Mello fumbled with the key before actually getting the door to unlock. Most the doors would send an error message before actually unlocking. Matt didn’t live in Carey Hall but this was one of the oldest buildings on campus and was desperately in need on a makeover. Matt sat him down on the bed, “Desk drawer.” Mello said, taking a deep, rickety breath. Matt opened the drawer and pulled out a chocolate bar, among the many he had stashed in the drawer.
Matt scanned the room, messy like his but slightly more organized. A thick stack of papers sat on his desk. A loose tie hung off his headboard. Mello ate it. “What can I do?” Matt asked. Mello shook his head, “I’m fine, don’t worry.” Matt sat beside him, “I thought you were going to croak or something.” He admitted. Mello laughed, a real laugh. “You are too sweet, Matt.” He paused for a second. “But I like ‘em sweet.” Mello said.
Matt’s heart dropped. “I-” He started, but quickly found he didn’t have a rebuttal. “What? You're not into me? Who are you kidding, Matt?” He tilted his head.
Matt looked down at his lips and kissed him. Mello smiled into the kiss, kissing back. He pulled him to straddle him, his hands staying on Matt’s hips. Matt's hands moved into his blonde bob. Mello’s tongue swiped Matt’s bottom lip, begging for entrance. Matt gave in.
Mello flipped him over, getting rid of Matt’s sweater. Matt looked up at him. Mello ran his hands down his lover's torso, he pressed a kiss to Matt’s neck.
“Bless us-” He whispered, faintly off his lips. He kissed further down.
“And these thy gifts-” Again,
“Which we are about to receive-” Lower,
“From thy bounty-” Again,
“Through Christ our Lord.” Lower,
The catholic prayer before meals. A shiver ran over Matt’s body as he felt himself stiffen. He hit Matt’s happy trail, kissing just above where his jeans stopped him. His hands went since his mouth couldn’t, rubbing at where something hard sat under the jeans. “Can these come off?” He looked up at Matt. Matt nodded, needy already, admiring him from above. Mello shimmed off Matt’s jeans with a little help from Matt lifting his hips. Matt’s underwear went with it.
Mello’s hand immediately went around Matt’s cock. “Oh wow, first-year.” Mello mummbled. His mouth joined in on the fun his hand was having. Rapping his lips around his tip, Matt whimpered. Mello moved his head down, he threw his head back. “Fuck-”
Mello lifted up, “Yeah? That feel good?” He asked, “Don’t- Don’t stop, please.” Matt begged. He went back to his work on him.
And it worked; didn’t take long for him to spill into his mouth. Mello moaned as his mouth filled with Matt’s cum, and he swallowed. Matt tried to switch, but Mello shook his head, “Face the headboard and get on your knees.” Mello said. He did as told. Mello took off his pants and grabbed a bottle of lube from his bedside drawer. He squirted some out on his hard dick. “Rub it in.” He told Matt. Matt rubbed his hand around his cock, spreading the lube.
“Mhhh good.” Mello groaned, “Just- mhh…” He tipped his head back, Matt kissed his tip. “On your hands.” He said moving around. He squirted some more lube onto his ass, rubbing it in. With some leftover lube on his fingers, he slips one in first. Matt moaned, “I haven’t even started yet. Whatever will I do with you?” Mello teased.
“I’ll be good, promise.” Matt whimpered. Mello slipped another finger in and started moving them, “Don’t make promises you can’t keep, Matt.” Mello said. “Mhh.” Matt moaned.
Mello took out his fingers, “Are you ready?” He asked before slipping his dick in him without getting a response. Matt let out a shutter of a moan. Mello pumped into him slowly. Mello grabbed his hips with force, Matt’s hand came back to hold his. He smacked his hand away, “Don’t make me use that tie.” Mello muttered. Matt’s head fell down, “Yes, Sir.” Mello moaned, “Say that again.”
“Yes, sir.” Matt said, teasing him slightly. Mello smacked his ass. “So good for me.” He pumped harder. Within a few minutes they were both messy, panting, and completely drunk on lust.
Mello cleaned them both up while Matt laid down, Mello slipped below his head so Matt’s head was in his lap. He looked down at him, “Are you okay?” Matt whispered up to him. Mello nodded, a quip hum. “I’m the one who should be asking if someone is okay.” Mello whispered, running his hands through Matt’s hair, “I’m fine. Great, even.” He said.
Mello leaned down and kissed him, it was gentle this time, not lust induced. Matt kissed him back. They went to sleep that night, cuddled up in Mello’s bed.
☠︎︎♱✮♱༻¨*:·༺ ♱✮♱༻·:*¨༺☠︎︎
They had mass the next day, since the party was found out. They had to ‘repent for their sins’. Matt was sitting with the first-years when he saw Mello get up and walk into the hallway. Two minutes afterward , Matt left too. Mello caught his hand and pushed him against the wall.
Smiling ear to ear, “Why aren’t you listening to the sermon, first-year?” Mello teased. “I had to use the bathroom.” Matt answered. Mello nodded, “Yeah, you sure?” Matt kissed him.
The sermon could be heard as Matt switched them around, pushed Mello against the wall. “Create in me a clean heart, O God, and renew a right spirit within me.” Dr Bruess, the president of Saint John’s reading of Psalms 51.
Matt stopped, “We should stop, we’re in Mass.” He said backing away. Mello looked confused, “Hey, everything is fine, Matt.” He cupped Matt’s face. Matt took a deep stabilizing breath. “We are in a church.” He whispered. Mello groaned and pulled him into the bathroom. “Do you feel guilty about this?” Mello asked.
Matt shook his head, “It’s not you, it’s me.” Mello crossed his arms. “Because I’m a guy? You wouldn’t feel bad if I was a woman, would you?” Mello accused. Matt’s silence solidified his statement. Mello opened the door and started walking out.
Matt caught his arm and pulled him back. But he didn’t say anything. Mello grumbled but kissed him. Matt kissed him back. Matt pushed him against the door. Mello's hands went up to tug on Matt’s vest.
Matt grabbed his hands and pinned them beside his head. He kissed down his neck, marking him on his jaw. “Fuck, Matt.” Mello managed out. Mello tried to move his hands, Matt came up, “My turn.” He said. He pulled him to the counter and backed him against it. Matt’s hands went down to Mello's belt, still making out with his neck.
“Matt…” Mello moaned out when Matt sloppy kissed behind Mello’s ear. “Hush, someone will hear.” He whispered. Yanking off Mello’s belt, he unbuttoned his dress pants letting gravity take them. He used both hands to pull down Mello’s underwear. He grazed his teeth over his neck. “Matt…” Mello whined.
Matt rubbed his hand up and down Mello’s hard dick. “Matt!” He whisper shouted, panting. “I said hush.” Matt whispered in his ear. “I can’t…” Mello whined. “You're not a baby, stop whining.” Matt said in his ear. Moving his hand faster.
“This isn’t fair, I let you be as loud as you wanted.” He managed out. “This is different, we are in a place of worship.” Matt said, taking his hand away to undo his own pants. Mello whined.
Matt pushed him up on the counter, and laid him back; he was halfway in the sink. Matt’s hand found his cock again. He came within a few pumps. Matt took his cum and rubbed it on his own dick.
Using it as lube, he lined himself up. Then pushed in. Mello threw his head back. “Eyes on me.” Matt spoke softly. Mello looked back at him, the vein in his forehead popping. Matt pumped into him, moving ever so slightly.
“So tight, you sure you’ve been with other guys?” Matt teased. “Oh fuck you.” Mello said, moaning halfway through. The room filled with moans, not even caring if someone were to come in or if someone could hear out in the hallway. With each pump, each hair of movement, Matt got closer to the line, and Mello was barely holding back anything anymore.
Matt covered Mello’s tip, making him hold it. His whole body shuddered, “Fuck-” Mello moaned. “I’m so close.” Matt whispered in a fit of pants and moans. “I know, just let go, and I will too.” Mello begged as Matt still covered his dick with his thumb.
Matt came, it rolling over his whole body and he slouched forward, leaving his mess inside Mello. Mello cupped his face, then kissed him softly.
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