Jun Thorne

Probably out there, looking at the stars

[jun-thorne]

Hey y'all

Since my Ao3 (and tumblr, for that matter) account is usually very silent I wanted to scream a small lifesign out there.

For anyone who is interested in space battles, i have uploaded my latest writing exercise. Its a small work, but any comments or criticism are obviously appreciated.

An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works

Greetings into the void and read you next time :)

[jun-thorne]

After pretty much an entire exame phase, I have finally finished my MutsUrie Multi Chapter Fic "on my own."

Feel free to enjoy and thank you for your Patience

An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works

[sparerarepairs-deactivated20221]

everyday, the overwhelming urge to make content for rarepairs out of spite increases. Yes, this goes out to those who are content starved and tired™

[jun-thorne]

Hi,

Since Chapter V of On my own (not anymore) is still in the making, I thought I'd share a small snippet here. If you want to check out the full story, you can do so here:

An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works

And with that out of the way, I humbly present my small snippet. Enjoy:

Since the windows of Saiko's room are pretty much always closed, it is not the sunlight that softly wakes the blue haired girl from her deep slumber. Instead, it is the fine smell of breakfast, waffles and fruit to be precise, that pulls her from colourful dreams of Knights, princesses and racing cars.

Normally, Saiko is the prime example of a morning grouch; seldom leaving the bed before noon. But the smell of breakfast, which her heightened senses recognize without a problem, does wonders to erase any sleepiness in her body. Opening her eyes, she relishes for a small moment in the warmth of her bed, but in the end, the thought of food is just to inviting.

Slipping out from her large comforter, Saiko makes sure to not wake the gorgeous, black-haired and naked female, sleeping next to her. Without a noise, she leaves her room, quietly closing the door behind her. The delicious smell of breakfast is much stronger in the hallway, and Saiko's stomach begins to growl. Speeding up a bit, she makes her way down the stairs.

In the kitchen, Saiko is presented with the sight of Mutsuki, who is currently whisking some kind of waffle batter (as far as Saiko knows, baking is not exactly her strong suit).

“Good morning Muchaan” she says, her voice still a bit hoarse from their excessive karaoke session the night before. Mutsuki turns around quickly, his cheeks tinted in a light red.

“Good morning Saiko” he responds hastily. “Didn’t hear you coming down. You want breakfast?” he adds.

“Yes, please, Saiko's hungry” she answers. Tooru just nods, and turns around again.

“You like waffles?” he asks,

Saiko hums in response, but her mind is already somewhere else. To her curiosity, Mutsuki seems to wear nothing but a familiar looking, long black shirt which reaches about halfway down his thighs.

But what really piques Saiko's interest is the trail of faint, red marks on Mutsuki's neck, which seem to reach from the tips of his mint green hair down into the shirt.

Is that …? She thinks, a bubbly feeling of excitement forming in her chest. Trying to look as normal as possible, her gaze travels downwards to the hem of the black shirt, which really seems familiar somehow. First, she sees nothing, but when Tooru stretches to reach for a pack of cinnamon in one of the upper shelves, she finds what she was looking for.

Under the hem of the shirt, on the olive skin of Mutsuki's thighs, Saiko spots another trail of marks, this one leading upwards, and ending in a pair of black boxer shorts.

Almost giggling with glee, she hoists herself up in her chair. Tooru, who is too caught up in his waffle making, doesn’t notice her suddenly change in behaviour.

“Tooru, where is Urie?” She answers, forcing her voice to sound as inconspicuous as possible.

“He is out getting syrup, because we didn’t have any” Mutsuki says, still concentrated on his waffles.

“Well, I suppose you must be very hungry” Saiko responds, her voice still indifferent. “Exhausting night and all that”

“You’re right about that” Mutsuki chuckles, but if he catches the secret meaning in Saiko's words, he doesn’t show it.

“How was it anyway?” Saiko asks, her voice filled with the teasing tone she can’t hide anymore. “You and Kuki I mean”

At that, Tooru drops his whisk. Spinning around, the blood already rushing to his cheeks, he looks like a deer in headlights.

“How did you…?” he asks, trying and failing miserably at feigning ignorance. Upon noticing Saiko’s knowing smile, he sighs, leaning back against the kitchen counter. “How did you know” he asks, defeated.

“Well, you’re wearing his boxers” she says, and starts to laugh.

It doesn’t take long for Mutsuki to join in.

[jun-thorne]

After months of writers block and busyness, I am finally back at writing. I am currently uploading my first multichapter fanfiction (Fandom: Tokyo Ghoul) and although it is a hot mess, I am somewhat proud of it.

If you want to read it, you can do so here.

An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works

[jun-thorne]

I will fall so you can rise. "He is wonderful, Kishou, really!” The young, green haired woman laughed. “He had so much to endure, so much to suffer. It feels like he jumped right out of a novel”

Arima felt the corners of his lips pulling. He did not share Etos enthusiasm for tragedies, but her happiness and talkative behaviour always lightened up his mood.

“Ill see if he is a suitable candidate for our purpose” he replied in his usual serious tone.

“The CCG will soon attack the 20. Ward. Then I will be able to assess him first-hand.”

Eto giggled “I’m sure he will prove himself to be worthy, Kishou. Ken Kaneki, the future one-eyed King. “

 

The atmosphere in cochlea resembled the silence before the storm. The air was thick and seemed tense. The occasional footsteps of the guards were hectic, nervous. But the white reaper of the CCG remained unfazed.

Kishou Arima stood motionless on his post, his glance fixed and his face neutral. But his outer appearance deceived. His mind was racing, roaming restless, thinking about him.

During the last months, Haise had changed. Arima pretended not to notice, but the truth could not have been more obvious. The, formerly, strong wall between Ken Kaneki and Haise Sasaki had crumbled and turned to dust. The gears which had been created by Eto and him, Arima, were now turning, and could not be stopped anymore.

 

„You need a name. “Arima said, his voice bland and stern, his face vacuous.

“A name…? “Replied Prisoner 240, surprise and a hint of confusion in his expression.

“The rehabilitation program plans for you to become an investigator. We cannot call you number 240 forever. What would you like it to be?  Arima said, his expression still neutral.

“A Name… Don’t others usually give names?” asked Prisoner 240. The surprise in his face had now turned into confusion completely.

“The Higher ups have said that they would leave it to you.” Arima replied, his voice imperceptibly softer. “Pick to of your favourite Kanji”

“Then Coffee… and the world” 240 said after hesitating shortly.

“So Haise“

„mmm… I like it. It sounds nice. Thank you, Arima-San. “ in Haise’s voice lay happiness, as he looked up to Arima. The older man looked back with his usual neutral expression. But if one would have looked closely, they could have recognized the spark in Arimas eyes, which had not been there before.

 

A squad of guards passed under the platform he was standing on. But Arima did not pay attention to them, his thoughts dwelling in the past.

Arima had supervised the “creation” of Haise Sasaki. He had trained him, had watched him grow and learn. He knew every of his little mannerism, every move of him, by heart.

In the beginning he had tried to convince himself, that his interest in Sasaki had been of pure professional nature. Eto had chosen him, and he would train him, forming him into the man he needed to be.

But Arima had grown fond of Haise. He catched himself reorganizing his schedule to make time to return the borrowed books personally, or to slide in a small stop for coffee at the chateau.

 

“Arima-San, your coffee is really mug-nificent” Haise snickered, voice filled with unconcealed pride about his successful pun. Contrary to his normally reserved behaviour, Arima could feel a small grin pull on the corners of his mouth.

“Thank you, that beans a lot to me” he answered, resulting in Haise bursting out with laughter and spitting his Coffee over the table. The sight was hilarious and soon Arima was laughing too, loud and sincere.

 

Startled by his thoughts, Arima returned his attention to the present. He noticed the small smile which had sneaked upon his face and quickly removed it, going back to his blank expression. He could not afford such displays of emotion.

His thoughts travelled to his first encounter with Kaneki, during the fight at the route V14 under the 20. Ward. The determination of the young ghoul had surprised, even impressed him. Kanekis will had been strong, but he had been no match for Arima. Still, Arima had decided to spare his life…. At least a part of it. He had inflicted intolerable pain on Kaneki, wiping out his old life and his memories in the process.

 

„You were right Eto” he said. “He really is special. “

„Was there ever any doubt?” asked the young ghoul. “He has this determination, right?

 Arima only nodded-

“This world is just like a novel, Kishou…” she mused “and we are creating the protagonist.”

“That remains to be seen” he replied.

 

Arima checked his watch. 11:32 PM. The night had already fallen over cochlea. Haise would not wait much longer, he knew. Soon it would begin.

Arimas gaze wandered through cochlea, suddenly fixing on a inconspicuous door in the lower levels. His position stiffed imperceptibly and a wave of nausea came over him.

 

„This is our last meeting. “ He said, seemingly emotionless.

It was a futile attempt to make their parting easier.

“I… will miss you” the green haired woman said, not even trying to supress the feelings which crept into her voice. She stood up from the smack bed in her cell and looked him in the eyes. Arima returned her gaze, a small smile playing on his lips. He closed the distance between them and embraced her in his arms.

“My Story is now written” he whispered. “And I’m glad I spent it with you.”

“Me too” she answered. She rose up on her tip toes and her lips brushed softly over his in a last tender kiss. When they parted she averted her gaze.

„Kishou… He will succeed, right?” suddenly doubt in her normally confident voice.

“Of Course! “He answered.

 

The Sirens of the cochlea whirred in Arimas ears and pulled him out of his thoughts

“Attention Staff: Capture the Person who is continuing to open the isolation cells. Associate Special Class Haise Sasaki. I repeat: capture Haise Sasaki “

At the end of the bridge, he was standing on Squad 0 appeared, his squad. They were whispering with each other, seemingly nervous. With a side glance he noticed that Take Hirako was eyeing him but Arima did not pay attention to it. Etos words echoed through his mind

“I’m sure he will prove himself to be worthy, Kishou. Ken Kaneki, the future one-eyed King. “

Yes, Kaneki was worthy, of that Arima was sure.

And so, he made his decision.

“Squad 0, the orders which I gave remain unchanged!” he said, his voice stern and without any emotion. His gaze wandered over the young investigators, his grey eyes cold and still filled with pride. Then he turned to Hirako

„Take good care of them Take” he said, a hint of warmth in his voice. He patted him on the shoulder, an almost heartfelt gesture between the partners which had known each other for so long. They exchanged one last glance, then Arima turned away.

His thoughts which had been restless in the last hours were now at ease, making room for a pleasant void. There was only one last task to fulfil.

„Haise… I will fall so you can rise!” he whispered

[jun-thorne]

This story (oneshot) takes place after the events of the auction. Wanted to do this for a long time, finally got down to do it. If you have feedback, I would be glad! Criticism is also greatly appreciated (I want to improve after all).

Confusion

Even at 1am in the morning, Tokyo could not be considered as peaceful. The sound of cars and the chattering of passerbys filled the streets, creating a ubiquitous murmur. But to Seido Takizawa, this was one of the more peaceful moments.

The ghoul leaped through the night, from rooftop to rooftop, a dark shadow above the flickering city lights, his white hair illuminated by the dim light of the moon.

No one at Aogiri would miss him at this hour, he thought. Ghouls usually hunted at night; his absence was therefore expected.

But hunger was not the reason why Seido roamed through Tokyo. No, his goal that night was of different nature.

After the auction, Seidos mind had become even more confused. Before, hunger and self-hatred had been all that burned inside him. And he was content with it. Their bitter taste kept the confusion away. All these disgusting, human parts of him he had buried so deep. They muttered questions, screamed inside him and confused his already unstable mind even more. So he had supressed them, replaced them with his hatred.

But something had changed, when he had seen her. It had only been a short glimpse, one small look during his escape, but it had been enough to awaken something deep inside him. His mind wouldn’t concentrate on the anger anymore, instead he would bring up sensations or memories Seido had long thought forgotten.

The faint smell of pineapple shampoo, a pair of violet eyes, blonde hair in the sun...

"This has to end!" Seido thought. He made one last leap, landed on a rooftop and suddenly he stopped. Standing at the edge of an apartment building, his toes already hanging over the edges, he froze.

Now that he had arrived, he was not so sure anymore.

"What am I doing here?" the thought echoing through his mind.

Standing on the ledge, Seido could feel his stomach twisting.

"It’s not like I can talk to her! I am a ghoul; she would kill me without hesitation! She probably has already forgotten!"

His thoughts were racing, stomach clenching even tighter, and suddenly Seido felt sick. He rose a finger to his mouth, biting on the knuckles till blood dripped on his tongue and the sharp pain returned his mind to the moment.

"I’ll just take a look! It’s not like she’s awake. I’ll just need to see her one more time, then I’ll move on" he whispered, more to convince himself. It didn’t work.

Still Seido knew that he had to do it. In the last weeks the confusion inside of him had grown unbearable. He found himself lying awake, thinking of blonde hair and snarky comments. Emotions, he had thought long gone, resurfaced, and the human parts in him slowly crawled back up. And with these parts came the desire to see her again, to look into her eyes and hear her voice.

Of course, this was not possible, he knew that, but every time he tried to suppress these thoughts, they came back stronger.

Seido felt himself giggle, a joyless sound which was immediately swallowed by the night surrounding him.

"I’m like the protagonist in one of these stupid soaps Hina-chan watches" he thought. "Hopelessly lost to a beautiful and tragic lady".

It had to end; he knew it. These thoughts made him weak, unfocussed. And Ghouls devoured the weak.

Seido took a deep breath and stepped forward. He went into a free fall, rushing past half a dozen balcony’s before he stretched out his arm and caught himself. He could almost hear his muscles tear, felt pain race through his nerves but he welcomed the feeling which anchored him in the moment. With his other arm he pulled himself up, sitting down on the rail of the balcony. His muscles tensed as he rose his eyes to take a look.

Akiras room was minimalistic. A bed, a TV, and a blanket for her hideous Cat, which was nowhere to be found. But Seido took only quick notice of this, his eyes drawn to something else. Sleeping on the bed, only in a light black nightgown was she. Akira Mado. Her delicate figure was illuminated by the dim moonlight, her chest lifting slowly with every breath, a peaceful expression adorning her normally stoic face.

His heart was beating rapidly, but not because of the fall he had just survived. Suddenly Seido felt ashamed. He did not belong in this place, he knew that. Still, he couldn’t turn his eyes away.

“She is so beautiful” he thought. His eyes lingered over her body, absorbing every inch of her into his memory.

“What am I doing?” he whispered. He had come to end things. See her and forget her, that had been his plan. And if that wouldn’t work, well then, he would just kill her. Problem solved. She was only human after all, weak! But now that he was here, he could already feel the confusion coming, freezing his body and chocking his throat with cold, dead hands.

Weak… he repeated over and over. Weak, weak, weak, beautiful, weak, gentle, weak, admirable, BEAUTIFUL!

Seido opened his eyes again, noticing the taste of blood in his mouth. His right Hand was throbbing in pain but the confusion was supressed again.

“For now…”

As much as he hated to admit it, he had failed. Coming here had not helped him in the slightest. He could still feel his human parts, even more than before. They were clawing at his heart, eagerly trying to rip it out.

A single tear rolled down his pale check, gleaming in the moonlight.

“If they could see me now” he thought. Seido Takizawa, the feared Owl, Nightmare of the CCG defeated and destroyed by simply looking at a woman.

“It’s the second time she defeated you…” he chuckled. This thought was strangely comforting.

A sudden movement caught his eye. Akiras expression had changed, she was now frowning and rolling over, her breathing becoming faster.

“a nightmare” Seido thought, feeling a little sting of worry.

“I should go” he whispered to himself, but he couldn’t bring himself to move. He knew that forgetting her was now impossible but bizarrely this thought did not fuel his anger. He threw another look at her. Akira was still frowning, her brows pulled together in a V Shape, her soft lips pressed together. Her body was trembling lightly.

Another sting went through Seido, making him skip a breath. “I’ll protect you” he whispered, a small, but warm smile forming on his lips. He settled down on the balcony rail, dangling his legs over the edge. He averted his gaze from her and looked at the moon, a silent resolve forming in his mind, drowning out any emotions and confusion. No Harm would come to her tonight!

A sudden noise made him freeze. The balcony door had been opened. Seidos heart jumped in his chest, every nerve screamed at him to leave, but he could not move a muscle.

Leave, leave, leave, LEAVE!!!!

Quiet footsteps approached him, but he still couldn’t move. Every moment, Mados Quinke would impale him, splattering his organs and blood over here balcony. This would be his end, he knew it!

“Seido?” Her voice was soft, and still heavy with sleep. No aggression, no anger.

Seido mustered all his willpower and slowly turned his head. Akira Mado stood only an arm’s length apart, her hair tousled and her arms wrapped around her torso. Her face was full of confusion, but there was something else in her eyes as she looked at him.

Affection? Grief?

“What are you doing here?” She asked, her voice still so unbearable soft. Seidos mind was flooding with thoughts. Why was she here, unarmed, unprepared? Why didn’t she attack him, why wasn’t she angry, why was her voice so soft?

“I…uhm” Seidos words only came out as a raspy whisper. He did not know what to say. This situation did not make sense, his sudden feelings did not make sense, everything was too much!!!

Akira looked at him, patiently. There was no resentment in her expression, only confusion mixed with… grief?

“I… came to see you” Seido murmured, confusion raging through his mind like a firestorm.

Akira looked at him, her eyes locking his in place. Her lip was trembling, he realized. Suddenly she stepped forward, and before Seido could react, she wrapped her arms around him in a tight hug. Seido could feel her breath at his chest, feel her warm skin clatched at him. His mind went blank.

She was trembling, he realized. Acting instinctively, he slowly wrapped his arms around her, comforting her as she began to sob into his chest. He did not understand what was happening, but holding her felt right, just so right. And as little drops fell onto her head, still buried in his chest he realized that he was crying too, tears silently running down his cheeks.

After what felt like a moment, but what could also have been an eternity, her sobbing stopped and his tears dried out. Slowly, she was the first to pull back out of their embrace. Her eyes locked with his. They were red and swollen, but she smiled nonetheless, a warm and equally sad smile.

“I thought I lost you.” Her voice was hoarse from crying but Seido noticed the small glimmer of happiness in it. And he wanted to scream. “You lost me! I am dead! This isn’t me” But all that came out of his mouth was a small whimper “Akira…”

“Akira, I am a monster now!”

He expected her smile to die down, swallowed by the realization that he was, indeed, a monster, despicable and dangerous. But it didn’t happen. Instead, Akira raised her index finger to his mouth in a silencing gesture. Her eyes looked up to him, a violet, determined gaze.

“When you and Amon died, I lost everything.” Akiras voice was still husky but a vigorous tone was now underlining her words. “I don’t care what they did to you, or what they made you do, Seido! You are alive, you are here.”

Seidos felt his cheeks flush red in shame. This wasn’t right! Sure, he was still Seido Takizawa, but not the one she remembered. He had done terrible things, she knew that! He was a ghoul, the kind of beast she had sworn to destroy. Suddenly he couldn’t bear to look into her eyes anymore. He turned his head looking away in shame.

You’re a monster!

He felt a soft touch of fingers on his chin. Her thump gently stroked his pale skin and his black lips as she slowly turned his head, forcing him gently to look at her. And as Seido looked into her eyes he saw nothing but softness in her gaze.

“After the auction I read your file” she said, her voice now clearer. “I know what you did, what they did to you… I know that you´re a ghoul now…” She raised her chin, and Seido couldn’t help but remember the famous Mado pride. “And I´m still here Seido! I left you once, I will not do it again. Whatever comes next, well go through it together!” She said, with a voice that made absolutely clear that she had meant what she said.

Seido looked at her, a barely noticeably smile on his face. Words couldn’t express how he felt, couldn’t express the thankfulness, the shame and the happiness which sparked in his heart, not supressed anymore. And he knew that he wouldn’t find the right words to tell her. Instead, he closed his eyes and leaned slowly forward, his lips brushing softly against hers. They were so much softer than he had imagined, gentle but defined.

Slowly he pulled back, suddenly afraid he had made a mistake. But when he looked into her eyes this fear disappeared. Her gaze was still soft as she looked up to him. She shoot a quick glance at his black lips, a fire in her eyes, that he was sure had not been there before. Slowly she raised her hands, caressing his cheeks with her thump and then crossing them behind his head to pull him down to her.

Their second Kiss was more passionate. Akira pressed her lips to his, still gentle but more demanding than before. Soon she opened her mouth, gently sliding her tongue over his lips. When Seido opened his mouth, their tongues started to dance with each other, exploring the newfound spaces. Akira moaned softly, taking even the last concern from Seido. He gently grabbed her hips, moving her closer to him, embracing her and feeling her warmth through his dark cloak. For a long moment the remained like this; then Akira pulled back, emitting a small whimper from Seido.

“Will you stay the night?” She asked, making a gesture in the direction of her bed. She had lowered her head, avoiding his eyes as she asked. Seido felt a sharp spike of guilt. She was already afraid of losing him again.

“I will” he stated firmly.

Akira looked up to him again, her smile returning. “Great, because its getting a little bit cold out here.”

She grabbed his hand, leading him into her room. It was warm, Seido thought. And it smelled like her. As his eyes lingered back to her, he realized that she was inspecting him with a contained smile on her face.

“That muddy cloak does not come near my bed!” she stated. Seido couldn’t help but chuckle at her comment. Akiras smile grew wider as she closed the distance between them, her fingers quickly undoing the straps of his coat. Soon, she stripped it off his shoulders, the cloak falling silently to the ground. Seido stepped out of the legs, a little bit self-conscious and feeling somewhat naked. He was now wrapped only in his tight black shirt and a pair of loose pants which both, just like the Cloak, were rather muddy. He sighed and kicked these off as well, standing now only in his boxers. When he looked at Akira, his face flushed slightly red, he couldn’t help but notice her admiring gazes.

“You got muscular” she said, no hints of teasing in her voice. Seido couldn’t help but feel flattered.

“Thanks” he muttered. Still, he couldn’t quite shake his embarrassment and quickly slipped under the covers of Akiras bed. Only a moment later he could feel the warmness of Akiras body at his side. In a quick movement, she cradled her arms around him, and kissed his forehead. “Sleep well Seido” she whispered softly. And Seido knew he would.