洛冰河 , a study in : loss and the absence of childhood due to trauma and abuse. the cycle of abuse and its effects on a blossoming youth. an exploration of what it means to love ─── to be chosen, again and again, and to love in spite of it all. and lastly: the meaning of retribution, revenge, at the hands of a lonely protagonist.
#JUNSHANG: an independent and low activity LUO BINGHE from mo xiang tongxiu’s 人渣反派自救系统 as written by belen, 23, he/she/they. this blog will contain triggering themes, including but not limited to: gore, severe bodily mutilation, mentions of physical / mental abuse, torture, etc. please follow at your own discretion and know that muse =/= mun.
rules biography bonds / mobile friendly rules below.
- heres my last and only disclaimer: this blog will contain HEAVILY triggering content such as mentions of mental / physical abuse, gore, severe bodily mutilation, suicide, torture etc. though none of these triggers will ever be written on this blog, they are strong themes in luo binghe’s background so be aware i may mention things on occasion, especially in headcanon posts. please follow at your own discretion.
- my portrayal of luo binghe in both bingmei and bingge incarnations is canon divergent ! i am not comfortable with some themes in the canon source material due to my own real life experiences and will omit some things from my portrayal because of it. i primarily follow novel canon over donghua canon, but heavily rely on my own headcanons.
- please note that luo binghe is severely mentally ill due to abuse and trauma in his past. i feel like i can’t stress this enough! he’s endured a lot of trauma in both iterations and he can be very morally gray because of it. along with this, he lives under the influence of xin mo, a sword spirit that quite literally erodes at his morality. these factors often lead to sporadic behavior, explosive anger, severe abandonment issues, low self esteem, and self destructive tendencies to name a few. luo binghe is not nice by any means and wont hesitate to make it known. keep this in mind when interacting with him, do not expect me to water him down in any capacity, and above all, know that muse =/= mun.
- as for romantic shipping: to put it simply, shipping w/ luo binghe is hard + needs to be plotted heavily. luo bingmei and luo bingge are both married post canon, which can be worked around but only if plotted. please keep in mind his fixation on shen yuan! shen qingqiu is still a big part of who he is so i’m not really keen on watering that down either unless we plot heavily. with that being said, the only shen qingqiu / shen yuan i will be writing and shipping any variation of bingqiu/bingyuan with is @/shenzuns.
- there aren’t many out there, especially for bing-ge, but i am 100% okay with duplicates. give me bingmei + bing-ge interactions right now !
- thank you to the wonderful @/numinousdread and @/feiyuie for my icon + header ♡
me @ myself: belen dont spam the dash you’ve posted two ooc things in a row already
also me, biting my fist: has anyone else considered how much shen jiu and luo bingge are narrative foils, their story lines are so fucking comparable bc both had / have very similar lives... that imo started the same, will end the same..... shen jiu hated luo bingge for appearing to have all the opportunities he himself did not have, yet perpetuated the same abuse he himself received as a child and! for shen jiu narratively a lot of it is because he sees himself in bingge and is so disgusted by the reminder.... the mirror of himself he hates so much! its really sad to think about imo but ALSO has anyone thought about how because of the abuse they both suffered they turn to women for comfort, and have a radical dislike of men as a whole? and how for shen jiu this manifests as going to brothels? for bingge his harem? LIKE???
thinking some thoughts for my -5 tgcf followers rn but here are my thoughts so far!
- im thinking maybe he ascends as a deputy god for the original shen jiu as a young adult / teenager, maybe alongside ming fan / ning yingying, because i want to keep the same genre of dynamic between disciples / shizun, since its so vital to his story.
- anyway, shen jiu originally chooses him as a deputy god because he acknowledges his potential and eventually comes to hate bing-ge for all the same reasons he hates him in canon. the abuse he endures is the same as in canon. no one steps up to save or acknowledge the abuse besides nyy.
- gotta think through the schematics of this a little more, but in the end im thinking shen jiu would probably do something along the lines of framing bing-ge and get him banished from the heavenly realm. and maybe he’s killed somewhere along the line because of this chain of events. ,
- maybe sj does this bc of something to do with bing-ge’s lineage and tlj being notorious for something (maybe he’s an old ghost king?? who knows) …. no specifics yet bc i gotta think on it a little more, but n e way im thinking he gets cursed shackles and all before he dies because of the weight of the accusations. maybe those are the main factor in why he eventually dies. i’ll come back and add more to this when i think of it but some thoughts are being had.
- moving on, mayhaps bingge comes back as a ghost …. goes to mt tonglu … emerges … plans to get his revenge on shen jiu + hides his identity as a calamity / devastation level ghost bc it’s Bin-ge :tm: … …… maybe by virtue of doing something rly good (gestures vaguely at bing-ge saving a bunch of pretty ladies as he does in canon) he ascends again, but as a martial god by his own merit… and the revenge starts there!
- this final possibility is a little looser because as a tgcf main at heart i dont wanna stomp on tgcf canon, so this is just me throwing things out there. but i do think all the while getting his revenge on sj (which would, logically, take years as sqq is probably a heavenly official with a lot of power), bing-ge would want to amass power in the heavenly realm. maybe he takes over parts of the ghost realm and the like. realistically he would want to do the same as in canon and try to take over as much as he could and combine the realms…… but this ofc is a little looser, bc tgcf canon is just. yeah! i dont think i’ll make this part of the verse, im just thinking some thoughts out loud. just thinking of what bing-ge would do. hehehe
betrayal finds itself a home between the spaces of liu qingge’s ribcage. perhaps he’s doomed to weather another like he has years ago. he finds that it does hurt more than the stinging pain on his knuckles and the throbbing ache to his head , but nonetheless , betrayal had hurt ⸻ but if it had been anyone else , it would not be the length of a rope he would tie his neck around.
@junshang has taken from him once again. except , it was not the luo binghe he had fought against for five years who had done it , gloating at what was left of his crushed pride. ( in all honesty , this luo binghe , his binghe was probably the one who had held the rest of it. )
liu qingge finds that he would not stand for that humiliation again , and steels his gaze to muster his ire ( and even if he tried to look at him with a semblance of hatred , he could not so easily will the tides away from the fondness that had taken root and grew. )
“ the truth , if you so much as want to live. ” it’s nothing less kind , and perhaps it his own brand of mercy. for luo binghe ; for himself.
there is a cruel irony in the love that grows fond within luo binghe ─── this deep sentiment had never been his intention in spite of all that he yearned for it. for it to grow in the space made by a dead man walking, one who’d very well behead him right now if he spout but a word bending the truth, was the hilarity of it all. to toy with liu qingge was all his intention ─── all to get back at the other shen qingqiu, who so clearly had wanted him but had foolishly remained idle. that was it. perhaps a quick fuck, too, for a pretty face like that would have been wasted if not painted in pleasure ─── luo binghe had not intended this.
fate has favored him for years now, decades of wealth, conquer, and women a cheap scheme to mend the way luo binghe was sorely abandoned by any god that may have taken pity upon him. back then, he actually thought himself cursed for the way he was abhorred by others. an unlovable child beast destined to go without. it’s been long years since he’s thought himself cursed, but the unrelenting thought that perhaps it was because of some fundamental part him that others were incapable of truly loving him had never abated.
among the hundreds that had tried, liu qingge seemed to have been the exception, wanting only for him, ( not his status, nor his blood or riches, nor anything luo binghe had offered him, only him ) nothing more.
it is such that luo binghe has long since abandoned any other feelings of fear, the child within him that once staved off violent fear at the very sight a humble tea cup long dead along with all he bared. but he once again feels the part of this pitiful child, the tremble of his fingers minute but achingly present.
“ qingge .... this lord ─── ” he swallows audibly, steadying his breath. if liu qingge deemed to behead him right now, he’d be within his right. but luo binghe wants, with an aching desperation for liu qingge to see that he never ─── he never wanted to hurt him. “ i never intended for this to happen. you must understand, what i feel for you, qingge, i have never felt for another. ”
feiyuie asked: “ why should i trust you? ” / lqg!!
“ ah, liu shishu should know, if i wanted him dead, he would be. ”
luo binghe cannot help but taunt him- bai zhan peak’s legendary war god looks nothing the part of his usual facade, panting loudly at his feet whilst flushed a bright crimson. a flower, those of the many that cursed with a sort of suffocating heat, had seemed to come upon his shishu. his usually white pressed pristine robes are torn, revealing strips of tantalizing milky skin beneath, his chest heaving with the effort to regulate his breaths. luo binghe, for all that he is loyal to his shizun, lets his eyes wander momentarily- its certainly a sight to behold, this world renown war god, dragged through the mud, made real and tangible and mortal. luo binghe himself thinks the holy title was never fitting in the first place, has thought so from the moment liu qingge fell defeated at his sword. a true deity would not fall so easily- but luo binghe has also long since given up any belief of the existence of a heavenly realm.
he slowly drags his gaze back over liu qingge, the defiance ablaze liu qingge’s stormy gray eyes a stark contrast to the soft contours of his lithe body- it feels as if liu qingge intends to kill him with look alone, eyebrows drawn taut. luo binghe simply meets his gaze squarely, knowing better than to take the abhorrent look his fabled shishu gives him to heart. no, he is not the least bit intimidated by the snarl that leaves his throat following his steady gaze. instead, he is fascinated by how hard liu qingge tries and fails to hide the obvious desire hidden beneath layers of shame.
luo binghe can see the appeal in liu qingge’s beauty in an utterly objective sense. such a pretty face was not dulled by the spiteful look marring its features nor the venomous words that followed it. he thought himself impartial to anyone but shen qingqiu, but following their recent conversations as husband and wife, a part of him understands why his shizun is (though vehemently denies) enamored so. he thinks that perhaps if there was less blood shed between them, liu shishu could stand him enough to join shizun in what they both so clearly want.
but luo binghe would not interject himself where he clearly is not wanted, despite the sinuous curve of heat curling beneath his skin at the sight of liu qingge so prettily on his knees.
“ though im sure liu shishu thinks himself above this cure, a drop of my blood could clear the poision. ” he drawls casually whilst descending upon liu qingge. the last dredges of his control wither as he allows himself to grasp a strand of his inky black hair ‘tween his fingers. “ or perhaps ..... would liu shishu prefer i fetch shizun? ” the words are uttered over the crest of liu qingge’s ear, tantalizingly slow as luo binghe watches liu qingge bodily jerk at the proposition. “ my dear wife would also be glad to be of aide to liu shishu, you only need request it. ”
you know I rly love that fanon headcanon that bingge is smaller than bingmei bc of the abuse and malnourishment and whatnot that he went through that bingmei did not…. like imagine how mad he could have been coming into scum villain universe and seeing that bingmei has a few inches on him AHAHAHA
