She tiptoes behind him, glaring at the papers he's been buried in for a while now. His glasses were resting low as his eyes were barely sharp anymore after grading numerous works.
She pouts thoughtfully, glancing at him.
"Professor Rafayel works so diligently lately. Is there something I could help with?"
Walking across the room, she settles in a chair across the table. Her hand supported her chin as she pouted, glancing at the pile of papers.
At first, it almost seems like he hasnât heard her. His pen still moving in slow, red ink bleeding into the margins of yet another paper. But then the corner of his mouth lifts, like heâd sensed her presence long before she spoke.
âMm,â he hums, voice low and worn from hours of silence. âYouâve been standing there long enough.â Only then does he glance up. His glasses have slipped dangerously low on his nose, and thereâs a faint crease between his brows.
âYou want to help?â he repeats, leaning back slightly in his chair. The wood creaks under him as he studies her, pouting, chin in hand, clearly more interested in him than the papers.
A quiet exhale leaves him, almost a laugh. âThatâs a dangerous offer, you know.â He taps the stack lightly with his pen. âThese are first year critiques. Half of them think abstract means I forgot what I was doing halfway through. The other halfâŠâ His eyes flick down briefly. âWell. Letâs just say they test my patience.â
He pauses, watching her more closely now. âBut somehow,â he adds, voice softer, âI doubt you came here to debate composition theory.â His pen comes to a stop. He sets it aside and folds his hands together on the desk.
âTell me,â Rafayel continues, tilting his head just slightly, âare you offering actual assistance⊠or are you here to distract your professor from his responsibilities?â
Under his gaze her confidence slightly falters, however, she straightens her back, trying to return it (which works, in a way). She glances at the pile of papers and back to him.
"Initially... I came here for the office hour", she says, gesturing to the clock behind him, reminding him of his official office hour time.
"But mr. Rafayel appeared to be way more busy with papers to notice. Perchance, getting straight A's means I won't have questions to ask my professor now?"
She hums, looking down, thinking of what to say next. The thin line between professionalism and pure interest in him is always so fragile, that she's not sure how any borders are still there.
Not only by her fault, though. His participation, too, played crucial role in it.
...
She glares at the pile of papers. Then at him.
"Of course I want to help. Is it the essay for the midterm period? I remember writing one. And getting A, as well"
She purses her lips.
"I could help. If you want me to. Otherwise, I can ask my question on the class tomorrow. Sorry to interrupt your evening, professor Rafayel", she says softly, standing up from her seat.
Rafayel watches her stand, and thatâs the exact moment something in his expression shifts. âSit down.â
He exhales through his nose, pushing his glasses up properly this time before setting the pen down for good. The faint smudge of red ink on his finger doesnât escape notice, but neither does the way his attention is now entirely on her.
âYou walked in during my office hours,â he says. âWhich means you didnât interrupt anything. Iâm the one failing to do my job properly.â His gaze flicks briefly to the clock, then back to her.
âAnd no,â he adds, âgetting straight Aâs doesnât revoke your right to ask me questions. If anything, it gives you more of them. Though Iâm beginning to suspect,â Rafayel continues, leaning back slightly, eyes narrowing in thought, âthat your question might not be entirely academic.â
His fingers tap once against the desk. âAs for helping,â he gestures lightly to the papers, âI wonât have a top student do my grading for me. That would be irresponsible and unfair.â
A small pause. ââŠeven if I trust your judgment more than most of my assistants.â That slips out a little too honestly, but he doesnât take it back. Instead, he studies her. âSit down,â he repeats, gentler this time. His voice lowers just slightly. âAsk your question.â
The playful smile suddenly drops immediately at that tone â he rarely spoke like that. So instead of poking into it, she complied. She sat back down with straight posture, knees pressed against each other with hands on top of them.
She looks at him, at the papers, at the clock. And now she knows â he's serious. Was there a lot of paper work today? Or some student upset him?
She thinks of a question now. She didn't have one, she lied. She didnât need office hours as expected from A student. She just goes in here like her second home. To talk with him and help him with mundane tasks.
She pursed her lips.
"...how to express emotions on canvas? Composition might be good, colors could be good, but how to find the fine line between academically correct drawing and... sincere one?"
She looks at him with genuine interest and some sort of vulnerability if he'd looked deeper.
Her fingers nervously play together as pads collided in circling movements.
"There is one painting I was working on. It looks perfect. From... casual viewer side. But it's plain. It's like a photography on big canvas. I don't feel emotional connection with it"
...
"I can't show it though. It's deeply personal", she says quickly before he could ask. Her gaze steadies on him, his eyes, his expression as she pursed her lips.
"Perhaps, adding more of lilac wouldn't hurt..." she thought
I wanted to buy a pair of heels. I've been searching for something like this for god knows how long, I found shop that sells them for cheapest and afforadble price. I waited my whole work day to buy them! But then the nuisances of commotion got me... And I mean traffic and bus STOP WORKING and another traffic. And the shop seller closed earlier even though I begged her to wait for me two hours in advance. Oh, I'm so sad, Raf. I'm going heel-less home and I wasted my two hours and money on three bus rides for nothing. I'm a sad, no, ANGRY fish. I have no fangs but I'm not better than a shark rn ;(
Rafayel lounges atop a sunwarmed rock, golden skin glistening, his long tail lazily swaying beneath the water. A strip of seaweed clings across his cheek, unnoticed, as he listens, eyes narrowing slightly.
âMm⊠my poor little princess,â he murmurs. âTwo hours, three buses, and nothing to show for it? I wouldâve flooded the streets for less.â His lips twitch, not quite a smile. âTraffic dares steal your time⊠a merchant dares refuse you? How bold of them.â
He flicks his tail, sending a ripple outward. âCome here.â His tone softens. âYou can be angry. Sharks bite, donât they? I wouldnât stop you. But next time, you tell me. Iâll have every shop in the city waiting⊠or Iâll bring the heels to you myself.â
Hii! May I ask for XavMC and RafMC (separate) about them having a very introverted partner? I get physically tired if I speak for too long and I get migraines if someone will speak to me for too long, so I wonder how those two would react to having such introverted girlfriend. Thank you!
ïčâĄïčbless your heart á Üž â . âđê± âĄ both raffy and xavier would be the most perfect boyfriends ever! ugh, i wish i could avoid going out in general because it drains my energy, so i kinda get you :(( and thank you so much for requesting, angel!
ïčâĄïčrafayel can talk enough for the both of you, so you never have to feel bad if you're out together and don't have the energy to contribute much. he's more than happy to keep the conversations flowing.~
ïčâĄïčbeware, though. he will tease you from time to time about being so quiet. âoh? i got⊠twelve words in less than five hours? we must frame this achievement, cutie. perhaps set a new record?â
ïčâĄïčbut in reality, he doesn't mind at all, nor does he keep count. there's beauty in silence, and he knows your communication skills and social battery have nothing to do with how much you love him.
ïčâĄïčonce raffy understands that, sometimes, it's not that you don't want to talk, but that you feel physically drained after doing so, he becomes very attentive and protective of your limits, especially in public.
ïčâĄïč he starts rescuing you from conversations the second your social battery begins running low. he excels in coming up with dramatic excuses and completely fake emergencies. he'll say whatever gets his cutie out of there, and convincingly so!
ïčâĄïč besides, since rafayel is incredibly observant, he eventually memorizes the difference between your comfortable silence and the silence that means you're reaching your limit. and yes, that includes recognizing your subtle facial expressions, or even your posture. he can and will take you away if he feels like you're done.
ïčâĄïč instead of expecting conversation all the time, he'll communicate in other ways, like with little and cutesy sketches, handwritten notes, smoochy faces, or even through texts⊠but you do have to reply quickly, otherwise he'll whine nonstop.
ïčâĄïčwhen your social battery is out, he'll practically forbid everyone from approaching you. no one is to disturb his precious pearl, and you best believe he'll stay quiet as a tomb once you're back home.
ïčâĄïč despite being quite expressive, as the artist he is, he never mistakes your quietness for boredom. he knows when you are listening to him and when you're enjoying yourself, even if your pretty face doesn't say it.
ïčâĄïč also, on those days when your battery is completely empty, he'll happily spend hours beside you painting, cooking, or working while the two of you barely exchange words. it's fine. as long as he gets to be close and knows that you're comfortable, he doesn't mind the silence. âĄ
ïčâĄïčplease, he doesn't even realize you're that quiet until he hears it from other people. he isn't exactly a yapper by nature, so he thinks the short conversations between the two of you are more than enough.
ïčâĄïč since he genuinely enjoys silence, being with you never feels "too quiet." to xavi, simply existing in the same room as you is already quality time.~
ïčâĄïč he would never pressure you to keep a conversation going. if you only have the energy to answer with a nod, a small hum, or a tiny smile, that's more than fine (it's not as if he doesn't do the same anyway).
ïčâĄïčhowever, when xavier realizes that talking for too long leaves you physically exhausted or triggers migraines, he quietly starts protecting your social battery without making that obvious. he knows that you don't want to make someone feel bad, so he treads carefully.
ïčâĄïč if someone keeps talking your ear off, he'll step into the conversation and answer for both of you until you're able to rest. people rarely notice what he's doing, and if they do, they don't really want to mess with xavier's blunt words and expressionless eyes.
ïčâĄïč he learns your subtle warning signs before you do. those shorter replies, or the way your gaze starts drifting, make him automatically say he's taking you home. no further explanation needed.
ïčâĄïč date time with xavi often means doing different things⊠in the same space. you can scroll on your phone while he reads, or you can play a video game while he rests his head on your shoulder, and he'll be having the time of his life.
ïčâĄïč he does get worried when you get actual migraines. he hates when you get to that point, so he'll do anything and everything to get you to rest⊠and then take a little nap himself. you can't blame him, though.~
ïčâĄïč xavier never makes you feel guilty over setting boundaries. if you don't want to talk, or don't want to stay out, you don't have to. if you take him out to a social gathering, but then start regretting it, he'll take you back home instantly.
ïčâĄïčhe truly only cares about you and your happiness, and he just so happens to enjoy quiet time and being at home, so⊠the silence works perfectly for the both of you. âĄ
Hello! Me againđ practically live in your inbox... I hope its okay... I would want to read about insomniac MC and Xavier. Lately due to hypomania I just... I go to sleep at 4am but wake up at 6am, or sleep at 2am and wake up at 4am. Its frustrating, and even more frustrating if we add nightmares i started to get. I just cant seem to sleep more than 2 hours and I wonder how Xavie would react to it
Thank you for doing so much for my requests, have a nice day! Sending kudos
Thank you for another request! It makes me happy to see you so frequently in my inbox. Please enjoy!
Xavier had always been able to fall asleep almost anywhere. On the couch, in the backseat of the Linkon subway, even sitting upright during long missions. It was one of the many things you envied about him.
Tonight was no different. The two of you climbed into bed just after midnight, exhaustion lingering after a particularly tough mission. Within minutes, his breathing had evened out.
Meanwhile, you rolled onto your left side, then your right. You fluffed your pillow, kicked the blankets off, pulled them back over yourself, closed your eyes, and opened them again. You checked the clock. 1:47.
With a quiet sigh, you rolled over again. Maybe if you laid on your back. No. Your side. No. You stared at the ceiling, your thoughts refusing to slow. Every time you felt yourself drifting, you startled awake again.
Eventually, you gave up. Trying your best not to disturb Xavier, you reached for your phone on the bedside table. The soft glow lit the room, and you'd barely unlocked it when a sleepy voice murmured beside you.
"Can't sleep?"
You looked over. Xavier was blinking at you, his hair messy, eyes still heavy with sleep.
"I'm sorry," you whispered immediately. "Go back to sleep."
Instead of answering, he pushed himself up onto one elbow. "You've been awake this whole time?"
You hesitated. "...Yeah."
Concern replaced the last bit of sleep in his expression. "When is the last time you got a full night of sleep?"
You shrugged. "A while ago, I don't know. Don't remember."
"You don't remember?"
You looked down at your phone. "I don't know...weeks? Maybe longer."
Xavier frowned. "How much have you been sleeping?"
You laughed quietly. "Depends."
He waited, brows furrowed.
"Usually...two hours." His expression didn't change, so you added, "...Sometimes less, maybe a little more." You waited for him to respond but when he didn't, you elaborated. "I wake up after a couple of hours, sometimes I can't fall asleep at all." You forced a small smile. "I've kind of accepted that's just how it is."
Xavier's brows drew together. "No."
His simple rejection caught you off guard "No?"
"You don't have to accept that."
You looked away. "I don't really know what else to do."
He reached over, gently taking the phone from your hands before setting it back on the bedside table. Then he turned the screen off completely, and the room fell into darkness once more.
"You should've told me."
"I didn't want to keep you awake."
He looked genuinely puzzled. "So instead you've been awake by yourself?"
You didn't have an answer for that.
Xavier sighed softly before opening his arms. "Come here."
You blinked. "What?"
"You're cold."
"I'm not."
"You are."
There was no arguing with him when he used that tone. Slowly, you scooted closer until he wrapped both arms around you. His chin rested lightly on top of your head.
For several minutes, neither of you spoke. The silence felt different. It wasn't lonely like the last few weeks.
Finally, Xavier interrupted it. "Nightmares?"
You nodded against his chest. "Sometimes."
"And the rest of the time?"
"I just..." Your voice broke. "I can't get my brain to stop."
His hand slowly rubbed up and down your back. "You've been carrying this by yourself for too long."
A lump in your throat made it difficult to swallow. "I didn't want to be difficult."
"You aren't."
His answer came quickly. "You deserve sleep."
His fingers threaded gently through your hair. "And until you get it..." He held you a little closer. "you don't have to spend your nights awake alone."
You listened to the steady rhythm of his heartbeat, his breathing, the warmth surrounding you. For the first time in what felt like forever, you weren't lying awake counting the hours. You were simply resting.
Sleep didn't come immediately. It still took time. Another hour passed, maybe even two. But Xavier didn't say anything, never let go. Even as his own eyelids grew heavy again, he continued tracing slow circles across your back.
Sometime before dawn, your thoughts finally quieted. Your breathing evened out. The last thing you felt before sleep claimed you was Xavier pressing a gentle kiss against your hair.
When he heard your breathing deepen, a small smile tugged at his lips. "Good," he whispered. "There you are."
And with you sound asleep in his arms, he finally let himself drift back to sleep, too.
Hello! I found your page and liked your HCs. Wondered if you could do LIs (Xavier and Raf specifically) with bipolar reader (rapid cycling)? I have that condition when I am ecstatic and hypomaniac (unaware/semi aware of it) for two weeks, spend a lot of money on hobbies, go out to cinemas, museums, any other type of leisure (+buying a lot of sweets, yummy food and deliveries). During that phase trying to find excuses not to take meds and then right after it I feel exhausted to even stand up from my bed and have harsh suicidal ideation (+take my meds more willingly). I would love to see your take on LIs handling it
hi!! tysm for requesting! hope this isnât oversharing but iâm schizotypal bipolar type (or smth like thatâŠ) and. man some of the things you listed i felt a little called out on lmao. anyways i hope i depicted it accurately, and i hope you know youâre loved and important and that you stay safe! if i get anything wrong or if thereâs anything you want me to change please let me know! also i wrote it for all 6 but made sure to spend extra time on xavier's + rafayel's!
tws: suicidal ideation, some mentions of self harm, controlling behavior maybe
xavier:
he would definitely notice more than heâd let you know. if he picked up on you going into a manic episode he probably wouldnât point it out, since he knows either youâll feel embarrassed, defensive, or wonât realize it even if he tells you. but he seems to be around a lot more at odd hours during these times. if you end up impulse driving to the nearest 24 hour cafe at 3 am? somehow instead of napping again heâs outside at that exact time and hey, would you look at that heâs hungry too! and now that youâre with someone else youâll likely be a bit safer too. any of your outings he either tags along or just happens to be in the same place as you.Â
if you struggle with understimulation during this time heâll try to find healthy ways to help, like inviting you out for any physically active events. also will get extra servings of any food he orders in case you forgot to eat again, same with water or other drinks!Â
heâs a really good person to bounce paranoia or anxiety off of. heâd never judge you for any question or reassurance you asked for, even if it logically made no sense. if you do struggle with paranoia, hallucinations, or anything like that heâd probably first try to tell you theyâre not real. if that helps heâll continue, and hold you close if it makes you feel safer. sometimes that can make some people worse though, so if it doesnât help you heâll ask when youâre out of the episode what he could do to help you feel safe during the experience.
i think heâd be pretty good at both reminding you and giving you good reasons to take your meds. if you struggle to keep up with appointments or refills heâll help remind you, and offers to go with you if it makes it any easier. he always texts you 10 minutes after your alarm to take your meds goes off. he never says itâs specifically for your meds, but itâs pretty obvious at this point that heâs trying to subtly remind you without making you feel pressured or called out.
also any night where he notices your apartment is active wayyy too late, he just conveniently happens to have a movie he has to return the next day and hasnât watched yet, or a new weighted blanket he wants your opinion on, or the convenience store had a sale on all your favorite snacks and he just had to come over and share them with you.
once you start to drop, he somehow pays even closer attention. if you start overanalyzing everything you did while manic or get intrusive thoughts, heâll put on your favorite movie and put you both under the comfiest blankets he can find. if you canât get your brain to stop, sometimes the best thing to do is to get some rest and a break, and he will make sure you arenât mean to yourself over needing some time.
if you donât like physical touch when you feel like this heâll back off, but still stays nearby. he knows how your thoughts can get, and heâs not going to give you a single moment alone until he knows he doesnât have to worry about losing you. heâs the least intrusive about this though, he doesnât want to make you feel suffocated or helpless he just wants to make sure youâre safe and that heâs there the moment you feel like hurting yourself.
the takeout places nearby know your orders by heart after how often either of you order food, but when youâre this low he makes sure you eat at least twice a day if you can. also will cuddle you even if you havenât showered in days, or if youâre nonverbal, or if your eyes are red and watery and your face irritated, or if you canât bring yourself to explain or even move outside of the shallow breathing you can manage. youâre his star, and if you canât shine on your own heâll hold you close and remind you just how loved and needed you are for as long as youâll let him <3
heâd also try to avoid stressing you out as much as possible, knowing anything unexpected is so much more overwhelming when youâre so exhausted. the other neighbors wonder why there are week long periods of no fire alarms going off from his part of the building, and somehow even work feels less chaotic with him managing your case load and talking to jenna for you if you need any sort of assistance (maybe temporarily moving you to lighter work for the week, at the very least thereâs no way youâre going off fighting wanderers on your own. when your eyes are this hollow, he has a hard time when youâre just in another room, heâs not risking you getting your intrusive thoughts in a situation where he could actually lose you).
rafayel:
your emotions tend to influence each other, even when you donât mean to. tbh i kinda hc him as having adhd a little bit so i think heâd be able to go along with whatever you had planned, whether itâs another impulsive trip to the other side of the city to check out a new cafe (and then spend the rest of the day visiting everywhere else and buying anything that caught your eye), or if itâs hiding in the blankets from the sun all day with no motivation to get out of bed.
you never get mad at him when heâs procrastinating on a painting, or when heâs understimulated and restless, and he wants to support you the same way. if youâre bouncing back and forth between countless projects and things you have to get done, heâll ask you to come over and help him decide which paint colors are better. if youâre restless and struggling to sit still or stay in one place, heâll say his wrist is cramping and the only cure is going to the beach with you. he would take you somewhere a bit more private so you can both relax easier, and you wonât get distracted by any of the vendors at more crowded beach venues.Â
heâs a lot more intentional with physical affection when youâre manic or depressed. usually he always has a hand on your waist, or tracing out a pattern on your arm, or twisting and curling your hair around his fingers. if these would irritate or disturb you, he tries to be firmer with his touch so it doesnât itch/tickle/make you uncomfortable. if it helps, he intentionally does it more often when he notices you either getting overwhelmed, restless, or the reverse when you struggle to even get up or brush your hair.
he does kind of enable you when you want to go out a lot, but he tries his best to be the more responsible of you two!! he only buys half of the stuff you both were looking at, and the exhibit was free anyways! at the very least makes sure your impulsive outings are safe, that you wear sunscreen and have water and a charged phone
you canât make excuses about your meds with him lol he will not let you. also will not drop it until you take them, not that it takes long since he has figured out the best ways to bribe you into taking them (and you donât want your fishie to be sad and worry about you all day, and you canât start your day without the shower of kisses he gives your face every time you donât fight him on taking your meds).
when your mental state inevitably crashes, he makes sure youâre comfy and get all the rest you need. if youâre not getting enough sunlight or struggling to get out of bed, he will literally carry you to a chair outside so you can both watch the sunset together. he also plans small things for you both to do, in comparison to the weeks before where you both went all over the city. heâll put together a small picnic to eat in his studio or on the beach, heâd get an entire bubble bath set up with candles and fluffy towels and everything if he notices youâre having a hard time showering, anything he can to make even the smallest moments feel lighter.
tries not to be too clingy if you need space when youâre feeling like this, but he never fully leaves you alone. after you tell him some of the thoughts you struggle with, heâs terrified of being too late when you need him one day. if you need the room to yourself, heâs sitting right outside the door listening for any concerning noises. if youâre going for a walk and want to be alone, heâll follow you after a little bit just in case. if youâve admitted to having suicidal or self harm thoughts recently, heâll do anything he can to stop you from going to work until youâre able to process and cope with them a little better. heâd never tell you how scared he is of losing you in that way, he never wants you to feel like a burden (and you never could be), but after especially heavy days he holds you just a little bit tighter in bed, just to prove to himself youâre safe and not going anywhere.
zayne:
heâs probably the best with helping in a practical way. if you struggle to keep a schedule, heâll make one for both of you to follow and checks in with you about it throughout the day. heâll discuss how youâre feeling at the beginning of each week and adjust the schedule accordingly - feeling restless or impulsive and want to go somewhere? heâs planned an outing later in the week if you get your responsibilities done, and every other day alternates with meeting for coffee/drinks and the bakery.
like i mentioned in other hcs, heâd get you a timed pill box and remind you when you need to take them. he also puts a small piece of candy in each of the boxes as a little treat for remembering them!Â
i think he would be a little strict about the schedule stuff, but only because he knows that the more you get out of whack, the harder it will be to recover when you come down. heâd never make you feel like he was disappointed in you, but would ask you ways he could help you better, or what your goals/wants are in regards to managing your symptoms.
would also surprise you after work with little things like flowers, plushies he saw while walking by a store that reminded him of you, maybe a book youâve been waiting to come out, anything to bring a little true excitement and happiness to your life. he does this all the time so you never feel self conscious about how you might be feeling, but he makes sure theyâre extra special when he notices you beginning to crash.
will write you a doctorâs note when you just canât get out of bed and go to work. he would much rather you rest safely than throw yourself into danger while your thoughts are so dark. heâd make sure to leave leftovers labeled for you, and would call you any chance he has to check up on you and your day. if youâve taken your meds on time and eaten the meals he left for you, heâll bring home extra treats from the bakery for you both to share (although you notice he never fights you over the last piece when youâre like this. you look up at the tv while youâre eating and when you look down the last 3 of whatever dessert he got you both have been pushed to your side of the container and heâs pretending to pay attention to whateverâs on the tv.
would help you shower if you let him, he really enjoys it after work. helping you wash your hair, or picking out your favorite body wash and listening to you giggle any time it tickles too much when heâs washing you, and wrapping you in a fluffy housecoat while you both cuddle and watch whatever is on the tv is what he thinks of when his day seems to drag on.
sylus:
similar to my other headcanons, he would also take over making sure your prescriptions were covered and delivered regularly. if he can bribe you to take them he will, but he will also send mephisto to bother you until you take them. when you do he texts you that heâs proud of you and to grab the small pouch mephisto brought with him (itâll either have your favorite candy or something small heâs picked up while out that reminded him of you)
tbh as long as youâre taking your meds, when you get manic he kind of just lets you do whatever you want as long as youâre safe. he wonât let you drive recklessly, but he will take you on rides where heâll go as fast as you want. you wouldnât have to worry about impulse spending or going out too much, he already encourages you to spend as much of his money as you want. and if itâs something that makes you happy or makes your flesh under your skin stop itching for a moment, heâs more than happy to let you do it.
he will make sure youâre taken care of during those times, though. he knows you forget to eat, so heâll text you while youâre out that heâs picking you up for reservations heâs made that fit perfectly in between your plans for the day, even though you decided it all that morning. makes sure you take a bag with you and will pack a water bottle, sunglasses, a jacket if needed, a small umbrella, a charger, and any afternoon/evening meds you take. also has mephie follow you just to make sure if you have a breakdown or do something too dangerous or reckless that he can get there asap.
when you crash down to the opposite, he wonât leave you for a moment. handles all his work with your head in his lap and sleeping peacefully, any time your face starts to frown he pets you a little more and you slowly relax again. loves taking baths together and encourages you to just go limp and close your eyes and let him take care of everything.Â
he encourages you to talk about anything youâre thinking or feeling, even if you worry itâs too dark or would upset him. even if it hurts him to hear the ways you feel or think about yourself when youâre like this, he wonât show it. he just holds you close and hums occasionally so you know heâs listening, the only sign it affects him at all is when the pattern of his thumb rubbing along your wrist pauses, or his other arm around your shoulders tightening and pulling you closer occasionally.
caleb:
heâs a good middle between zayne and sylus with this stuff, but also way more suffocating than either of them when youâre in an episode. he doesnât mean to, but he just wants to take over everything and make sure youâre safe and happy all the time.
heâd also plan a schedule depending on your mental state, with activities planned for both of you to do when heâs not at work and an at home schedule for when heâs gone for a bit. he hates leaving you alone regardless of what state youâre in, but he monitors you throughout the day just to make sure you stay home when heâs gone and that youâre safe and following his schedule. he would also get you a pill box and some fun stickers for you both to decorate it with, and leaves a little surprise in each box for the day. sometimes itâs a small note about how much he loves you or how proud he is of you, sometimes itâs asking what you want him to make for dinner when he gets home, sometimes itâs candy or a little toy.
when your mood turns to the opposite and you canât get out of bed by yourself, heâll take any chance he can to not leave. if heâs able to manage everything from home, heâs staying with you until all the storm clouds in your mind go away. heâs very patient but stubborn, like heâll sit on your side of the bed for an hour to coax you into letting him help you bathe, or brush your hair or teeth, or get dressed just to get some fresh clothes on. heâd make all your favorite meals, watch all your favorite comfort movies with you, and never leave you for a second.
when you both go to bed he just lays there for a moment, watching you breathe. some part of him is scared that if he allows himself to relax, to go to sleep, something will go wrong and youâll fade away into the darkness that seems to haunt you during these times. he holds you extra tight and promises that heâll never let anything hurt you, not even yourself.
valko:
heâs great at keeping up with you! whether youâre running from place to place, or impulsively going on a hike, or even just talking a mile a minute and jumping from topic to topic because your brain wonât slow down and your train of thought is a tangled mess, he can keep up with you changing your mind every 5 minutes and every word you say heâs nodding along. if he notices you getting overwhelmed with your own mental state though, heâs good at slowing you both down without it also upsetting you by going too slow for your mind. always has an extra pair of headphones if you need them, is great at finding little side places to stop into and explore for a moment on the way to your destination, etc.
reminds you to take your meds whenever you have breakfast or dinner together (or lunch if thatâs a time you take them!), and when you do he gives you a hersheyâs kiss and then kisses both your cheeks, nose, and forehead.
when the depression hits, he holds you extra tight, as if shutting the entire world out. makes sure you eat enough but never pushes you too far, if he notices you struggling to shower instead of mentioning it and possibly making you self conscious he instead goes on a hike or works out until heâs really gross and sweaty (may have intentionally gotten muddy just to sell the point) and begs you to shower with him so you feel like youâre being helpful and he also gets to take care of you. win win!
prepares meals for you when he has to go to work, and will text/call to remind you when to heat them up. also just calls you to ramble about whatever heâs working on, or an article he just read, or to listen to you, or even to just sit there and listen to your breathing and the background noise of the tv. anything to know youâre alive and waiting for him at home.
‷ ăpoliceman!nanami finding you crying on the sidewalk and comforting you. ËËË
the precinctâs fluorescent hum had long since faded into the cityâs evening static, replaced by the softer glow of streetlamps and the distant thrum of weekend traffic.
nanami saw you from half a block away.
a splash of color against the grey concrete, seated on the edge of the sidewalk like a garden flower that had somehow taken root in a crack. and you were crying, just quiet sniffling reaching his ears, your shoulders curved inward, a crumpled tissue pressed to your nose.
nanami slowed his pace. he didnât sigh, he did, however, briefly close his eyes as if asking the universe why it had to be him when all he wanted was to go home and read the newspaper. but the universe was predictably silent, so he approached. it was his duty after all.
âmiss.â
you looked up.
your eyes were wet and a little glassy, framed by lashes that clumped together in tiny, tragic triangles, your bottom lip was still trembling a bit and despite it allâ or maybe because of itâ nanami found himself thinking you looked rather lovely, as if you were a watercolor painting left out in the rain.
âare you all right?â he asked, voice even. âdo you need assistance?â
you blinked at him, then sniffled. âyouâre⊠really tall.â
âyes,â he agreed, because, well, it was true. he pursed his lips, head tilting forward as he patiently awaited for any kind of continuation from you.
âand you have aâŠâ you gestured vaguely at your own face, â...thing. on your face.â
âglasses.â
âglasses,â you repeated, nodding sagely as if heâd just shared profound wisdom. âi like them.â
âwhatâs your name, miss?â
your brows furrowed as you tried your best to give him the right answer before you muttered it out. he made a note to remember it.
you were clearly drunk; definitely drifting somewhere warm and hazy beyond sobriety. nanami assessed this in about two seconds. he also assessed that you were alone, it was getting late, and that sitting on a sidewalk in that dress was an invitation to every piece of gum and city grime within a three-foot radius.
âcan you tell me why youâre crying?â he asked, because protocol dictated he should establish whether a crime had occurred before he started making assumptions. but his voice had softened at the edges without his permission.
your face crumpled a little, enough to make something in his chest tighten. what a sad little creature you were.
âhe saidââ you started, then stopped, dabbing at your nose with the tissue. âhe said i was trying too hard. that i lookedâŠâ you gestured down at yourself, at the shimmer of your dress, â...like o was desperate.â
nanamiâs expression didnât change as he intently listened to your words.
âand i just thoughtâŠâ you continued, voice wobbling dangerously, âi thought i looked pretty. i felt pretty. i did my nails and everything, sir, see?â
you held out your hands. your nails were meticulously shaped, painted a delicate, pearlescent pink that caught the streetlamp light. your fingers trembled slightly.
nanami looked at your nails, his own hand darting forward to catch one of your fingers between his and rub on the surface. he looked at your dress, he looked at your face, all hopeful and devastated and endearingly tipsy, seeking validation from a complete stranger in a police uniform.
âtheyâre very nice nails,â he said.
you perked up, tear-tracks glistening. âreally?â
âreally.â He paused. âthe color suits you.â
it was the truth. heâd never been good at saying things he didnât mean, which was probably why he was still a beat cop instead of moving up the ladder. he saw you smile for the first time: a small, wobbly, watery curl of your glossy lips, and felt something quietly dangerous settle behind his ribs.
âthank you,â you whispered. then you deflated, as if remembering your grief all over again, âhe didnât even show up. i waited for an hour. an hour. and when i texted him, he saidâŠâ you trailed off, fresh tears spilling over.
nanami didnât need to hear the rest. heâd been a policeman long enough to piece together the shape of it. someone had let you down and had made you feel small for daring to care. it was, in his opinion, unforgivable. you were adorable.
âmay I?â he asked, gesturing to the spot on the curb beside you.
you nodded, sniffling, and he lowered himself down. his long legs stretched out in front of him, polished shoes planted on the asphalt. up close, he could smell your perfumeâsomething floral and softâand the faint lingering scent of whatever youâd been drinking earlier. wine, probably. something sweet.
you leaned toward him instinctively, a little magnet seeking north. âyouâre sitting on the sidewalk,â you observed. âisnât that against the rules?â
âiâm off-duty in twenty-three minutes,â he said. it was close enough to true. âiâll let myself off with a warning.â
that earned him a giggle, hiccupy and surprised, and you clapped a hand over your mouth like youâd forgotten you were capable of making that sound. nanami felt the corner of his own mouth twitch.
âyouâre very nice,â you said. âpretty policeman with the glasses. sitting on the dirty ground. for me.â
âthe ground isnât that dirty,â he replied, âand you looked like you needed someone to sit with you.â
your face crumpled, then smoothed, then crumpled again. you pressed your lips together hard. âthatâs⊠thatâs a really kind thing to say.â
he didnât answer, he wasnât even sure he could. instead, he just stayed there, solid and warm beside you, while the city hummed around you both and you slowly, gradually, stopped trembling. after a while, your head drifted sideways and landed on his shoulder. he let it.
âhe doesnât deserve your nails,â Nanami said eventually, into the quiet.
you let out a surprised laugh. âmy nails?â
âor your dress,â he added. âor the hour you waited. none of it.â
you were quiet for a moment, before muttering very softly, âyou donât even know me.â
âi know enough.â he turned his head slightly, looking down at the top of yours. âsomeone who puts in that much effort deserves someone who shows up.â
you pulled back just enough to look up at him, eyes red-rimmed but clearer now. âis that, like, a police thing? you have to say nice things to crying girls on sidewalks?â
âitâs not in the manual,â he said. and because you were looking at him like heâd hung the moon, and because he was very tired and his filter had apparently clocked out early, he added, âbut I mean it, sweetheart.â
you stared at him. he stared back.
âokay,â you whispered. âokay.â
he helped you up when your ride arrivedâ a friend youâd called, voice still thick but steadier now. before you climbed into the car, you turned back to him.
âwait,â you said, fumbling with your phone. âwhatâs your number? so i can, um. thank you properly. when Iâm notâŠâ you waved a hand at your own face. âthis.â
nanami hesitated. it wasnât very professional of him, yet he gave it to you anyway.
âtext me when youâre home,â he said, sliding the phone back into your waiting hand. âso I know you made it safely.â
you nodded, clutching the phone to your chest like something precious. âi will. i promise.â
he watched the taillights disappear around the corner and stood there for a long moment, hands in his pockets, the ghost of your perfume still lingering on his uniform. he had twenty-three minutes left on his shiftâwell, less nowâand a strange, unfamiliar lightness in his chest.
the next morning, he woke up to a text from an unknown number. It was a photo of your nails, catching the morning light, with a message underneath:
see? still pretty. thanks to you. - the sidewalk girl
nanami stared at his phone for a long time. then, very carefully, he saved your number and typed out a reply.
iâm glad. coffee sometime?
he hit send before he could overthink it, and for once in his life, was glad he did.
Itâs Xavier and MCâs first time on a mission as a couple. Their company knows they're dating, so they decide to save money and get one hotel room instead of two.
The mission briefing had been completely normal, until the very last line. âDue to budget optimization, assigned operatives will share accommodations.â
There had been a pause. A long one. Xavier had very deliberately not looked at you.
By the time you reached the hotel, neither of you had said a word about it. Not in the car. Not in the elevator. Not even when the receptionist handed over a single keycard with a polite, knowing smile.
It wasnât until the door clicked open that reality finally settled in. One room. One bed.
Xavier stepped inside first to scan over the room. Everything looked clean and safe. A king sized bed sat right in the center. Not even two small ones, no, an actual king sized mattress.
Just one. For us.
He set his gear down carefully on the table, buying himself some time. âWe can⊠request another room.â
Xavier watched the way you sat. The very cautious way you laid down like the bed might reject you. ââŠYouâre going to fall,â he said quietly.
He stepped closer, then sat on the bed beside you. The mattress dipped slightly under his weight, shifting you just a little closer without him even touching you yet.
When you pulled the blanket up to your chin and stared at him like that, he paused. ââŠXavie?â That nickname, it did something to him. His expression softened almost immediately.
âWe can cuddle, right?â
ââŠYes,â he answered without hesitation, ike there was never a world where the answer would be no. ââŠYou feel shy because this is new,â he said quietly. âNo mission. No urgency. Just⊠us.â A small pause. ââŠYouâre aware of it.â
When you asked about the second blanket, his gaze dropped to the one you were currently gripping like armor, then back to you. ââŠNo.â His hand reached out and gently caught the edge of the blanket. Just easing it down slightly from your chin.
âYou donât need it,â he murmured. He shifted closer. One arm slipped around you, resting more securely at your back. He guided you just a little closer, away from the edge of the bed.
ââŠStay here,â he said softly. His other hand adjusted the blanket properly over both of you this time. A quiet pause settled. ââŠIs this okay?â he asked, voice lower now.
She lets him pull her a little closer. Settling closer to him, she looks up at him with big eyes, watching him closely.
"...this blanket is too little", she whispered. Perhaps, it could be considered too little â if you were saving a distance while sharing one blanket. However, it was big enough to cover the king sized bed.
Slightly shifting, almost warily, she slips closer to him. Just a little.
"We should... uhm... rest", she murmured quietly, looking at his face as if she sees it for the first time.
What's so bad? They were a couple, so sleeping together is normal, was it? It could be, if he was wearing his white T shirt, but no. He was laying in robe that barely hid anything once he laid on the bed. Perhaps, the belt accidentally weakened its knot.
She could see his neck and collarbones. So instead she looked at the ceiling.
"...Xavie?"
...
"I feel shy", she confesses quietly, her gaze still on the ceiling as she tries to collect herself and ignore her attractive boyfriend. Perhaps, this bed was her biggest enemy. Even scarier than this mission.
She gulps loudly (even though she tried her best to hold composure).
So that's what sleeper build was. He was a hunter, of course, he has muscles. But now, seeing them slightly (thanks to the robe) instead of seeing his oversized hoodie, she felt like screaming and clawing her face from internal panic.
"...Xavie?"
...
"I got very lucky with you", she whispered softly, still staring at the ceiling.
"I want to grow comfortable with you, but I feel like panicking because you're acting differently today. Something about you is... I don't knowâ... makes me shy, you know? And this stupid blanket and one bed andâ... and this stupid robe. My cheeks are burning", she says quietly, pouting in defeat.
I have such strong migraines lately... i think it's from seeing dentist too often and anesthesia... can you take it away? It's too hurtful lately ;(
I cant take the pain away completely, but I can help U through it, alright?
For now, try this with me... dim the lights, put something cool over ur forehead, and unclench ur jaw gently. Slow breaths, like you're letting the pain drift out with each exhale.
I'm afraid if I take it everytime I have it, I'll get resistant to ibuprofen... but I did as you said and... unclenching my jaw really helped. Can we cuddle? I can handle period cramps, but migraines make me want to go limp in your arms ;(
tags/warnings: SLIGHT ALLUSIONS TO PREVIOUS BAD SEXUAL EXPERIENCE!!! xavier x afab!reader, p in v, porn w plot, soft smut, oral (f receiving), praise (good girl, pretty girl etc.), creampie (get the latex so u don't get that late text), lots of reassurance and checking in, SMUT MDNI , I think that's it !!
wc: 3.0k
a/n: hi hi !! this was requested by a beloved oomf, I hope this brings some comfort !! obviously everyones experience is different so I kind of took inspiration based off my own experiences dealing with intimacy after sa and stuff and the song i linked,, I tried to generalize a bit so that its not hyper-specific so I hope a lot of you can find comfort in this <3 I love u all so so so much !!!!
âXavier,â you mumble, pushing slightly against his chest, heâs quick to stop his movements. His eyes blown wide and hands shaking at his sides while he holds himself back.
âAre you okay? Did I do something?â His voice is soft, eyes quickly filling with concern as he takes a step back from you, giving you the space you always ask for. Your hand grabs his shirt, face flushing as you gently tug him closer.
âI-I want to,â you stutter out, heart racing as you avoid eye contact with your lover.
âYou do?â He's cautious as he stares at you, still rooted far away enough for you to leave, but close enough to where you could pull him back into your space. âWe don't have to, I don't care about that, my star,â his fingers twitch, hovering over your hips before he lets them fall to his sides.
âI know I donât, I know,â you breathe out, face burning as you gather the courage to look xavier in the eyes. âI want to, I want it, is that- can we?â Your voice wavers as you ask, shrinking into yourself slightly. Xavier smiles at you, eyes glimmering as he leans back into your space, slotting his lips against yours.
âI need to hear you say it, starlight. I want you to be sure that youâre ready,â his eyes bore into yours, not an ounce of urgency laced in his words. Only pure patience and affection for you.
âI want to have sex with you,â you breathe out, âplease?â you add sheepishly, smiling when xavier grins widely. your giggles fade quickly as he latches onto your neck, biting gently and running his tongue over your sweet spot. You moan softly, Xavierâs fingers dig into your hips.
âTell me the moment you want to stop, okay?â He's barely holding himself together, and yet he only cares about you. âPromise me starlight, promise me youâll tell me the moment you donât want it anymore,â his words are stern, and your heart flutters at how gentle he is with you.
âI promise, angel eyes,â you assure him, squealing slightly when he sweeps up off your feet and into his arms. âWhat are you doing?â
âTaking you to the bedroom. Iâm not going to have our first time on the couch, you deserve something better,â Xavier says, your stomach flipping at his words. âIs that okay with you?â
You nod gently, âitâs perfect.â Your arms wrap around his neck, lips finding his own as he carries you to the bedroom, practiced steps easily leading the way as your lips move in tandem with his. He whines softly when you bite down on his bottom lip, you smile at the sound.
Xavier sets you down gently, not bothering to flick the bedroom light on. golden orbs float around the room already, ensuring the two of you in warm lighting. You stare at him nervously, sitting on the edge of the bed as he stands between your legs. Your shaky hand reaches for the drawstring of his sweats, pulling them loose and sliding his sweats down his thick thighs.
Your mouth waters slightly at the sight of his bulge, eyes widening before staring back up at your lover. He smiles softly at you, leaning down and slowly pushing your back to the mattress. You can feel his hard-on against your clothed heat, swallowing thickly when Xavierâs lips trail to your shoulder.
âCan I take this off?â his whispers, motioning to your shirt. You stare at him for a moment before nodding, arching your back and lifting your arms. He tosses it to the side, gaze focused on you. âStill okay?â he asks, you nod.
âMore than okay,â you smile, letting your fingers tangle in the hair at the nape of his neck, pulling him down and crashing your lips onto his. Xavier lets himself melt into your touch, smiling when your noses bump against each other and you apologize against his lips.
His fingers ghost over your pajama shorts, pulling away to look at you. You give him a small nod, lifting your hips as he slowly drags them down your thighs, swallowing harshly when he notices the damp spot on your panties. His eyes rake over your figure, clad in your undergarments and writhing beneath him.
âYou're so beautiful, my star,â he whispers, the words come out laced in awe. You flush at his words, averting your gaze to his t-shirt, tugging at the hem as a signal for him to take it off. He complies quickly, crossing across his torso as he pulls the shirt off.
You hold yourself up on your elbows, eyes never once leaving the rippling muscles of his abdomen, subconsciously clenching your thighs together when his arms flex to toss the shirt aside. Xavier smirks down at you, eyes glinting mischievously before he leans back down, mouth hovering over your chest, he looks up at you through his lashes, a silent ask for permission. You give him another nod, arching your back slightly.
Xavierâs eyes flutter shut the second his lips are on your soft skin, a low groan rumbling in the back of his throat as his other hand gently cups your other breast over your bra. you gasp the feeling, âXav- take it off,â you rush out, fumbling to prop yourself up so he could undo your bra clasp. It doesn't take long for his dexterous fingers to reach behind you, easily unclasping your bra with one hand. Xavier gently sliding the straps down your shoulders, pressing gentle kisses to your shoulder.
âYouâre everything to me,â he mutters, âI canât believe Iâm so lucky.â His eyes find yours, youâre about to reply when he takes your nipple in his mouth, sucking gently and making your words die on your tongue with a whine.
âX-Xavier,â you breathe out, head thrown back as you try to stop your racing thoughts, focusing on the feeling of his mouth on you. Your eyes open, staring at the ceiling as you try and ground yourself, âw-wait,â you stutter out, pushing his head away from you gently. Your lover stops immediately, concern in his eyes as you try and steady your breathing.
âStarlight, Iâm here okay? Itâs just you and me,â his soft voice pulls you out of your own head, turning your head and coming face to face with a bun bun plush.
You canât stop the smile on your face, your hands coming to cover your face in embarrassment as you laugh. Xavier sits confused for a second, tentatively moving to lay next to you.
âGod, Iâm sorry Xav- I wanted this to be all sexy and awesome for you, and instead Iâm- I got all in my head and then bun bun was staring right at me andââ you cut yourself off with a frustrated groan, finally moving your hands away from your face and looking at Xavier.
There's no frustration, no disappointment, no anger anywhere on his face. He's smiling down at you, giggling quietly as you stare at him with a pout.
âDon't apologize, youâve already given me so much, I would never ask for more.â he reassures you, placing a kiss on your temple, âwe move at your pace, whatever you want. Iâm just happy to be here.â
You smile at his words, heartbeat slowing as you let yourself scoot against his body. âCan we- is it okay if we just kiss?â Xavier nods happily.
Somewhere between soft kisses and giggles youâd ended up on top of his lap, softly grinding down on his growing bulge as he bites your bottom lip.
You guide his calloused hand to your bare breasts, letting him pinch your pert nipples as you litter his jawline with wet kisses, breathing heaving as suckle on the skin beneath his ear.
âF-fuck star,â he groans, hips bucking up to meet yours, you let out a whine when his clothed cock bumps just right against your clit.
âI want- I need you,â you mumble, âneed you inside me xavier please,â you cry, grinding down harder as your eyes fill with tears. Xavier smiles at you, catching your lips in his as he puts one arm on your back, supporting you as he easily flips the two of you. When he sets you down gently he reaches over you, turning the bun bun plush around. You canât help but giggle as you get comfortable beneath him. âXavier,â you whimper, the sound immediately goes to his cock.Â
âIâll give you anything you want, my star,â he whispers, biting gently at your neck before letting his fingers hover over your underwear. âIs this okay?â he asks, you nod quickly, lifting your hips for him to pull them down your legs.
You can hear a growl in his throat as he comes face to face with your heat, the sound makes you blush. for a second he doesnât move, worry fills your mind as you swallow thickly, about to speak when he peppers kisses on your inner thighs, taking a deep breath before licking a long stripe over your cunt.
A small gasp leaves your lips, a strangled moan coming out of your throat when his tongue laps at your entrance, nose nudging your clit as he devours you like a man starved. Your fingers tangle in his soft hair, mind blank as his tongue works wonders on you. There isnât room for you to overthink, not as your ears are filled with lewd slurps and groans from Xavier and wanton moans from you.
Xavier traces your entrance with one finger, easily slipping in and pumping before adding another.
âFuck starlight, taste so fuckinâ good for me,â he mumbles, face still between your thighs, barely looking at how wrecked you already were. âMakinâ a mess for me, yeah? doing so good,â he praises, lapping up your juices as you clench around his digits from his words.
âWant you,â you manage out, fucking yourself down on his fingers, âneed you Xavier, please,â you beg, eyes still screwed shut in pleasure.
You can feel Xavier smile against you, jumping as he presses a kiss to your clit before reluctantly pulling away from your sopping pussy.
âanything you want, starlight,â he whispers, you pull him up to your face immediately, kissing him and moaning when his tongue slips into your mouth, making you taste yourself. Xavier doesnât disconnect your lips as he slips out of his boxers, letting his leaking tip brush against your clit.
âDonât tease me anymore, pleaseâ you whine against Xavier's lips, eyes fluttering open as you pull away from him. A small string of saliva connects the two of you, one Xavier greedily laps up when he leans in to press one last kiss to your lips. Xavierâs eyes are blown wide, dark blue as he stares down at you with flushed cheeks and ragged breathing.
âLet me know if you need me to stop, okay?â he says, voice shaking as you nod. Your hands grasping onto his biceps, nails digging slightly into the skin as you take a deep breath.
Xavierâs abs clench as his tip meets your leaking entrance, and it takes every fiber of his being to not move faster than he does. He moves slowly, watching you intently and throwing his own pleasure out the window. He stops when you wince slightly, sealing hard before nodding at him.
âDoing so good,â he whispers out, biting back a moan when you clamp down on him at the praise, he makes note of it. He almost collapses on top of you when heâs finally at the hilt, cock so deep inside you you feel it in your throat. âdoing okay baby?â he asks, you barely manage a nod.
âSo big,â you manage out, taking deep breaths as you adjust, âo-okay,â you nod, looking up at Xavier.
His eyes donât leave yours as he moves slowly, dragging his hard length against your gummy walls. His heart swells when you let out a soft moan, he can feel you relax beneath him as he moves slightly faster.
âIs that good, starlight?â he asks, hips thrusting against you as your eyes glaze over, mouth agape as you moan.
âSo good! fuck Xav-â you cut yourself off with a moan, Xavier smiles when he feels your fingernails digging into his shoulder blades.
Your head is thrown back in pleasure as xavier fucks into you, a sharp moan leaving your lips everytime his tip brushes just right against the gummy spot inside you. You couldnât speak even if you wanted, your lover's name coming out like a prayer as your hips move on their own to meet his thrusts. Stars paint your vision as your toes curl, the coil in your belly growing tighter and tighter with every grunt and groan xavier lets out by your ear.
âFuck starlight youâre so fuckinâ perfect,â he groans, âsuch a pretty girl and youâre all mine, right? doing so good fâme baby- ah you like that donât you?â he smiles, biting your ear lobe lightly and chuckling.
âPussy is all wet just for me, doing so perfect for me,â he accentuates every praise with a thrust, making your grip on him tighter. The sound of skin on skin filling the bedroom, the bed creaking beneath him as you wrap your legs around him locking him into place.
âXav- ngh- gonna cum,â you whimper, back arching off the mattress and pressing yourself against your lover.
âLet go for me pretty girl, cum around my cock, âm all yours baby take what you want,â he moans, âfuck star i love you, love you, love you love you sâmuch,â he chants, thrusts becoming sloppy when he feels your clenching down on his harder than before.
âXavier!â you gasp, moaning loudly as you bury your face in his neck, biting as your fingers claw at his back, vision blurring while your legs tighten around him.
âGive it to me baby, thatâs it let go fâme, my good girl,â he whines. You can feel his tip twitching inside of you as he tries to hold out for longer.
âInside,â you manage out, barely making eye contact with him as your legs push him further into you. Your words are all it takes for Xavier to come undone. He's a groaning mess as he releases inside of you, thick spurts of his seed painting your walls white as you pull his hair roughly and place your mouth on his.
Xavier doesnât hesitate to move his mouth against yours, moaning shamelessly into your mouth as he fucks his cum into you, whimpering at the overstimulation. Your legs keep him in position, moaning against him as you clench down on him, milking him for all he offers.
Xavier doesnât let himself collapse on top of you, quickly gathering his bearings and focusing on you. âYou okay? Wasn't too much?â he asks quietly, the two of you still panting, a thin sheen of sweat covering both of you.
You smile hazily at him, shaking your head ânoâ before letting your eyes flutter open. Xavier almost cums again at the sight of your glazed eyes. God, you looked utterly fucked out. He smooths your hair down, tucking a strand behind your ear and taking in the sight beneath him.
âWhat?â you ask, suddenly nervous under his gaze. As if he wasnât still balls deep in you.
âYou're just so beautiful, sometimes I can't believe I got so lucky,â he whispers, leaning down and placing a kiss to the tip of your nose.
âShut up,â you giggle, Xavier smiles at you, âIâm lucky too yâknow,â you mumble, watching as his face flushes crimson at your words.
âReady?â he asks, you nod. Xavier pulls out slowly, you involuntarily whimper at the loss of him, pussy clenching around nothing as his cum leaks out of you. Xavier canât help but take a finger gathering his release and fucking it back into you, apologizing sheepishly when you whimper.
Xavier is gentle as he cleans you up, checking in with you every couple moments and blushing when you smack him lightly. He carries you to the restroom, turning the hot water on and placing a kiss to the top of your head as it heats up.
âDid you enjoy it?â he asks nervously, you canât help but laugh, letting yourself melt into his side.
âXavier, that was the best Iâve ever had,â you admit, smiling when a proud smirk forms on your lover's face. âThank you,â you mumble as you step into the shower, Xavier follows suit as he rinses your hair.
âFor what?â
âFor being patient with me,â you say, eyes focused on the water in the tub, goosebumps rising on your skin when he places a feathery kiss to your shoulders.
âi would wait for you hundreds of years if you wanted me to, I love you so much, my star.â The words come so easily to him, the comfort makes your eyes water.
âAnd if I decide I don't want to have sex again?â you ask, heart pounding in your chest.
âThen I wonât have sex again,â he shrugs, shutting the water off as he reaches for your shampoo, âas long as I have you, I have everything I want.â
You grin as he lathers the shampoo in your hair, sighing softly as he scratches your scalp. You do the same for him, making his hair into a giant spike and giggling when he places bubbles on your nose.
Finally the two of you are under the covers, nestled impossibly close to one another. Xavierâs breathing is soft, and you canât help but peer up at him, tracing his features with your eyes. you jump slightly as he opens his eyes, smiling when he catches you staring.
âEverything okay?â
"Everything's perfect,â you reply, sighing contently as you rest your head on his chest, eyes closing. âWe'll be having sex again, by the way, that was just a hypothetical.â
Xavier chokes on his saliva, he hopes youâll ignore the boner he has. you donât.
Itâs Xavier and MCâs first time on a mission as a couple. Their company knows they're dating, so they decide to save money and get one hotel room instead of two.
The mission briefing had been completely normal, until the very last line. âDue to budget optimization, assigned operatives will share accommodations.â
There had been a pause. A long one. Xavier had very deliberately not looked at you.
By the time you reached the hotel, neither of you had said a word about it. Not in the car. Not in the elevator. Not even when the receptionist handed over a single keycard with a polite, knowing smile.
It wasnât until the door clicked open that reality finally settled in. One room. One bed.
Xavier stepped inside first to scan over the room. Everything looked clean and safe. A king sized bed sat right in the center. Not even two small ones, no, an actual king sized mattress.
Just one. For us.
He set his gear down carefully on the table, buying himself some time. âWe can⊠request another room.â
She listens to him while glancing at him sometimes â still too shy. However, his voice and words did calm her down. Her hands found his forearms as she gently held them.
"...okay", she murmured softly.
Glancing back at the bed, she felt more at ease at the thought of resting together. She looked back at him, pursing her lips shyly.
"Shall we rest now...?"
Slowly sitting down on the edge of the bed, almost cautiously she lays on it. Too far away from the middle of the bed, her body was a few centimeters away from falling off.
She looks at him, resting on his side. Involuntary her hands gripped the blanket and pulled it higher â up to her chin.
She still stared.
"...Xavie?"
In this silence her voice rings off the walls gently.
"We can cuddle, right?" she asks, as if they didn't have that right for whatever reason. At his nod she shifts closer to him. Just slightly.
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