In six seconds, youâll hate me. But in six months, youâll be a better writer.
From this point forwardâat least for the next half yearâyou may not use âthoughtâ verbs. These include: Thinks, Knows, Understands, Realizes, Believes, Wants, Remembers, Imagines, Desires, and a hundred others you love to use.
The list should also include: Loves and Hates. And it should include: Is and Has, but weâll get to those later.
Until some time around Christmas, you canât write: Kenny wondered if Monica didnât like him going out at nightâŠâ
Instead, youâll have to un-pack that to something like: âThe mornings after Kenny had stayed out, beyond the last bus, until heâd had to bum a ride or pay for a cab and got home to find Monica faking sleep, faking because she never slept that quiet, those mornings, sheâd only put her own cup of coffee in the microwave. Never his.â
Instead of characters knowing anything, you must now present the details that allow the reader to know them. Instead of a character wanting something, you must now describe the thing so that the reader wants it.
Instead of saying: âAdam knew Gwen liked him.â Youâll have to say: âBetween classes, Gwen had always leaned on his locker when heâd go to open it. Sheâs roll her eyes and shove off with one foot, leaving a black-heel mark on the painted metal, but she also left the smell of her perfume. The combination lock would still be warm from her butt. And the next break, Gwen would be leaned there, again.â
In short, no more short-cuts. Only specific sensory detail: action, smell, taste, sound, and feeling.
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