took him a while but he got it
Show & Tell
"I'm Dorothy Gale from Kansas"
PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH

blake kathryn

ellievsbear

@theartofmadeline
sheepfilms
todays bird
Sweet Seals For You, Always

#extradirty

if i look back, i am lost
đȘŒ
Today's Document
Noah Kahan
Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her

Andulka

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2025 on Tumblr: Trends That Defined the Year
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will byers stan first human second

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@karmatoukame
took him a while but he got it
i love little kids that share too much information. today a girl came in with her mom to order food and i told her i liked her dress. she said âthanks my mom stole it from targetâ
Mom, chatting to family :Â âOh, that dress was on sale at Target for 80% off! It was an absolute steal!â
Little girl, internally memos :Â âMom stole this dressâ
my rooster doesnât crow when the sun rises, he crows when he hears humans wake up, like you can literally just roll over in bed and heâs like âhoLY SHIT THATâS A PEOPLE THE HUMAN ISAWAKE AHHH AHHH AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHâ
the same rooster - god guys heâs so cute - he always lets hens eat treats first and wonât have any treats until theyâve had as much as they want, unless itâs a blueberry. shit, blueberries are like serious fucking business for Pharaoh. heâs a gentleman until the damn blueberries come out and then he donât play no fuckin games
in case you were wondering this is him
Itâs been almost a year since I made this post so I guess I should update you guys on Pharaoh!
Heâs still a sweetie but with more attitude and will fuck up your shit if heâs grumpy or if youâre wearing shoes with shoelaces. He doesnât like that. He watches Netflix with me a lot and cries anytime theres explosions or gunshots in a show. He has so many chicken lady friends who he adores and he has fathered 4 chicks. I tried to train him to walk on a leash but he protested by laying down and refusing to move, so we gave that up after a while. He likes to guard me from cars and squirrels, and even plastic bags (which are his worst fear)
Quality rooster
*At some point after they rescue Matt* Matt: SHIRO I NEED A KNIFE AND SOME TAPE Shiro: why Matt: I BUILT A R O O M B A
You do not understand how much I love the fantasy AU.
Ms. Badass.
he begged âno moreâ but the holy hand ignored his plea
victorious // panic! at the disco
I think the most Gemini thing my dad has ever done is one year he threw himself a reverse surprise party for the sheer drama of it. What is a reverse surprise party? you may ask, well let me tell you. So he invites over all his friends and family and then in the middle of dinner he stands up and announces that itâs not a regular dinner, it is in fact, his birthday dinner (his exact words were âSurprise! âŠ. itâs my Birthdayâ) cue everyone looking panicked, because oh god I donât have a gift, I donât even have a card, but my father, wine glass still in hand assures them not to worry and reveals a pile of presents he got for himself and wrapped for everyone to pick one and give it to him as their gift. And honestly? My father is such a legend.
just met my roommate and she informed me that we live on the same floor as the entire girlâs rowing team. i cant believe im about to enter a fanfic university au and my beefy butch girlfriend who can benchpress me is just one fateful laundry day away
When I was dancing, whether it was the music or the story, the question was, âWhy am I doing this piece, and why am I dancing?â It is exactly the same when you are acting. You have a very close relationship with your body movement. You have to find the physicality of your character.
â Sofia Boutella
In six seconds, youâll hate me. But in six months, youâll be a better writer. From this point forwardâat least for the next half yearâyou may not use âthoughtâ verbs. These include: Thinks, Knows, Understands, Realizes, Believes, Wants, Remembers, Imagines, Desires, and a hundred others you love to use. The list should also include: Loves and Hates. And it should include: Is and Has, but weâll get to those later. Until some time around Christmas, you canât write: Kenny wondered if Monica didnât like him going out at nightâŠâ Instead, youâll have to un-pack that to something like: âThe mornings after Kenny had stayed out, beyond the last bus, until heâd had to bum a ride or pay for a cab and got home to find Monica faking sleep, faking because she never slept that quiet, those mornings, sheâd only put her own cup of coffee in the microwave. Never his.â Instead of characters knowing anything, you must now present the details that allow the reader to know them. Instead of a character wanting something, you must now describe the thing so that the reader wants it. Instead of saying: âAdam knew Gwen liked him.â Youâll have to say: âBetween classes, Gwen had always leaned on his locker when heâd go to open it. Sheâs roll her eyes and shove off with one foot, leaving a black-heel mark on the painted metal, but she also left the smell of her perfume. The combination lock would still be warm from her butt. And the next break, Gwen would be leaned there, again.â In short, no more short-cuts. Only specific sensory detail: action, smell, taste, sound, and feeling.
Chuck Palahniuk (via basimagrimiyoaciyo-blog)
Why am I not surprised this happened to Tom out of all people
hmygd ITSRBTDoWNYJUNR
idk if Iâve posted about this before but by far the strangest things thatâs happened to me in retail was the time someoneâs total came out to my birth-year and I said âhey! thatâs the year I was born!â and then the next customerâs total came out to like $12.57 and just bc Iâm a weirdo I said âhey! thatâs the year I was born!â and without missing a fucking beat this like, 70+ year old man said
âAh! Another like me! Weâre few and far between these days, arenât we?â
And I was like oh man this guyâs sense of humor really aligns with mine! And I laughed and made some other joke about being immortal and thought that was the end of it,
but this man.
He stood by the register for five more minutes. Maybe more. Which let me tell you is an EXCRUTIATING amount of time for something like this to happen.
And he just kept upping the ante!! He starting talking about some REALLY specific details regarding day-to-day life in the 1300s to the point I started getting worried that Iâd misled a genuinely immortal being to believe I am also immortal.
He eventually politely left when I got too busy with other customers to awkwardly respond.
Who the fuck was that guy.
I think itâs also important to mention this happened at Cracker Barrel.