Karls @karmicheals - Tumblr Blog

conGRADulations !!

And YES I know what I've said about Hollonov missionary but I stand by it. Crucially, missionary is Ilya's favorite position because he has a domesticity kink and he likes to stare into Shane's big wet eyes, it really does it for him. Shane's favorite position is elbows and knees edge of the bed because he likes to get FUCKED. They can gaze at each other afterwards my boy wants to get it IN.

shaneposting

we don’t talk enough about shane’s dildo in general but we definitely don’t talk enough about him sucking it while he jerks off

shillanov

i think we also need to talk about how, sometime between the two years, he probably bought another dildo so he can fuck himself on one while sucking on the other

femdreamland

The wholesomeness of Shane wearing Ilya’s big t-shirt and simply asking him things like, “What’s your favorite city to play in?” while he’s 50 feet away from him on the couch just trying to get to know him

neeska3

LOOK WHAT THE KISS CAM CAUGHT

chubby-cry-baby

married shane x ilya

ilya pays the bill at restaurants by lying that he’s going to the bathroom - shane starts doing this too and now it’s a race to see who can covertly pay first

shane is super outdoorsy and can fix a lot of stuff around the house AND has tools!!!! ilya calls him mr get it done after hearing the GloRilla song

shane INSISTS on russian only days to accelerate his learning

when shane and ilya hang out with rose, she mentions about how shane was such a chill boyfriend and not possessive at all and ilya cannot control his laughter

shane uses ilya as his personal weighted blanket and other sensory grounding techniques (“can you grab and pull my hair” “kinky” “no - actually later”)

shane collected ilya’s hockey cards but had to have a huge binder of everyone’s so it doesn’t seem like he’s only collecting ilya’s cards - ilya has shane’s rookie card in his wallet (awwww)

lots of cuteness aggression doesn’t matter who’s around!!!!!!

“listen” “listening”

ilya’s entire camera roll goes from random pictures to shane shane shane - shane sleeping shane eating shane standing infront of the tv claiming he’s not watching shane in hockey gear shane cooking shane with anya shane at the cottage shane at the camps shane in his childhood bedroom shane shane shane

during the first year they were were officially dating but ilya was in boston; hayden jokes that shane should get lily flowers and draaags him to a flower shop so shane shows up to ilya’s house with lillies & after that ilya sends shane roses to tease him on game days

when apart; ilya sends 100 voice notes a day to shane (shane listens to them all together like asmr)

ilya will kiss shane just to steal lip balm

if shane is laying on the couch ilya will lay on him and put his head in shane’s shirt (“you’re stretching out the material”)

their shared google calendar is run like the navy (“hollander i don’t see blowjobs on thursday? i will add” “STOP IT MY MOM SEES THIS CALENDAR”)

ilya lowballs people on fb marketplace and then uses shane’s account to lowball them further

ilya’s snoring is so bad you can hear it from other rooms but it’s the only noise shane can sleep through its like white noise for shane

ilya posts a single tik tok and it's because he loves the 'husband haul' trend where he spends 45 seconds ragebaiting shane 'weak backhand' 'mr real estate' hollander and shane has the angry kitten face the entire time

ilya winking at shane is to shane what shane wearing glasses is to ilya

ilya writes to do lists / grocery lists in cyrillic and his penmanship is gorgeous (shane is surprised his jock hockey player husband has nice handwriting and that it took him 10 years to see it)

ilya calls troy his best friend and shane gets jealous

shane carries the bags when they go anywhere

ilya is shane’s emergency contact but shane’s parents are ilya’s emergency contact

“my shane”

aslongasitsblack

shane becomes convinced cliff and ilya are having an affair because they keep sending each other shit like ‘let me know when you’re back in boston big boy i want to slob on that monster dong’ and finally shane confronts him and ilya is like no baby this is how straight men talk to each other when they’re convinced each other are straight and shane’s like i have never said anything like that to anyone and ilyas like well except to me ;) and shane punches him in the arm and shows him his texts from hayden and they are all like ‘Hey Shane ☺️ thank you for sending Jackie mothers day flowers. We appreciate you so much man.’ and ilyas like shane. this is so fucking gay

shuploc

Connor/Ilya as "The Fallen Angel"

jaymanclayton

I would like to take a moment to appreciate that in the book timeline:

Shane is older than Ilya by a month ish (also the case in the show)

Scott is older than Ilya and Shane by 3 years

Troy is younger than Ilya by 4 years, meaning if Scott is ancient by Ilya's standard, Ilya is prehistoric to Troy

heatedrivalrysource

via Aika Flores

BALENCI boy in the streets 🤌🏼

lavenderprose

Love that Shane and Ilya are so insane for each other that it basically invokes the Forced Proximity trope from 500 miles away. Being in the same conference is too close for these fools. Being the same LEAGUE. What do you mean I have to see that guy once every six weeks and somehow keep my cool. What do you MEAN there's only a single international border separating us. How am I supposed to keep my emotional walls up when that guy sometimes occasionally comes within the general metropolitan area of my person. How can I fall asleep at night knowing that we're under the same constellations. This continent isn't big enough for the two of us. We're gonna have to kiss about it.

shillanov

ilya calls his boyfriend boring but wants nothing more than to have his own little shane hollanders folding their clothes with their tongues poking out, holding a hockey stick in their hands with their eyebrows furrowed, wearing little glasses as they bury their noses in a book before bedtime. this is what he wants most in the world. i asked him