Update: Things I Learned By Beating My ED
(My most popular post, by far, was published last May, and I still get notes on it nearly every day. I recently decided to update it to reflect some of the new things I have realized over the last 7 or so months. All the old stuff is in normal text but the new comments are in italics.)
The best way to make your eating disorder go away is to feed your body. Feed it good food that makes it happy. Listen to your cravings. Eat lots of good fats. You would be amazed by how well you feel when you eat well. There is room for pizza, avocado, chocolate, AND salad in every diet. Honor your body by giving it good food.
You can not simultaneously recover from a restrictive eating disorder and lose weight. That’s a bit counterproductive. Don’t trade your anorexia for orthorexia because it’s more socially acceptable. That’s not cool.
You may lose friends to this disease. Feel the sadness, but let it motivate you to keep fighting. If you don’t, you’ll die too. I can’t emphasize this enough. Imagine going to your best friends funeral and knowing that her disease was 100% treatable.
It doesn’t matter how many times you have been to treatment or how long you’ve been sick. You still have to do this. You’ll never think that you’re sick enough to recover. I saw something the other day that was like “If you don’t know how to share your story without telling all the details of how sick you are, you aren’t ready to be sharing your story yet.” THIS IS SO TRUE!! You can’t justify your own illness enough to make you happy. Just keep those numbers to yourself.
If you are questioning if you are sick enough, you absolutely are.
Eating Quest Bars, Arctic Zero, and Walden Farms because you like them is one thing. Eating them because it makes your eating disorder more comfortable is a completely different thing. You know the difference. Be honest with yourself and eat some real ice cream. It’s great to live a healthy lifestyle. I do. But don’t confuse health with an eating disorder. Again, ice cream and fruit salad can both be part of your diet.
“Eating clean” and getting “fit” are concepts that are not the same as recovering. They can’t happen at the same time. Your #gainz mean nothing when your 6 feet under. Harsh, but true.
You can never, ever again go on a diet. (credit to Doc Rob for this one) This is still so important. Just live a balanced life. You’ll get farther that way.
The professionals probably know more than you do (until they don’t, but that’s a story for a different day). Trust them.
Full recovery is 100% possible. Forrealz. I was 100% recovered before, but now I’m like 180% recovered. It’s completely possible to leave your eating disorder in the past.
Things only get better if you work to make them better (by eating). Success can be planned.
