karol

Sometimes I like to write songs to forget the tedium around me Follow me on Soundcloud: Karol Instagram: Iamkarolzs

[kazyzs]

I suffocated myself

Once, twice, three times

In a split second

I had it in my hands to fail

I know all my faults by heart

I've never been the loved one

I work the other way around

[konoko]

[sa-dnesss]

“It’s gotten to the point where I don’t know who I am anymore. I constantly feel like I am on the verge of breaking down. I feel like I am going crazy, and if my mind is an ocean, my thoughts are a tsunami. I can’t sleep, I can’t concentrate, I can’t even think straight. I am a fucking mess.”

—

[booksquoteslife]

“I want to look back and say that I was alive. That I didn’t turn my back. That I tried. That I was happy.”

— Evelyn Waugh, Brideshead Revisited

[rackofhis]

we have a piano in our basement and occasionally, late at night, you can hear keys being pressed. i’m too much of a coward to go down there, but its a nice source of inspiration for art. 

[kazyzs]

Hi I'm back with another song, I wrote it recently and even posted a video on youtube, if anyone is curious to hear my voiceeee

I hope you like it :)

I kind of feel

overwhelmed

Filling in the blanks

Cause oh my god

It's not like a ride on the merry-go-round

And it's not all about love

I don't give a damn about your pretty face

Or the way you seem to float when you walk

But I admit

Sometimes I feel like my jealousy could kill me

Yes I admit

That I may not be as you imagined

But we are too fucking youngs

To play basketball with each other's hearts

We are to fucking youngs

To know how to fake it so well

To be in love

And I got it right this time

I kinda feel

That sometimes I can't breathe

Dripping like a leak

And people say that

It's all in my head

Cause it's easier to pretend there ain't a problem

Than to be a problem

And that's the way the world works

But I admit

Sometimes I let anxiety get the better of me

Yes I admit it

And maybe that's not what you wanna hear

But we are too fucking youngs

To play basketball with each other's hearts

We are too fucking youngs

To know how to fake it so well

To be in love

And I got it right this time

But I hope someday

We'll find a better way

To make things make sense

I hope someday

You think of me

Not as an enemy or a bad memory

But now we are too fucking youngs

To play basketball with each other's hearts

We are too fucking youngs

To know how to fake it so well

To be in love

And I got it right this time

The link: https://youtu.be/3hBO-gKer3s

[kazyzs]

Just one more song and I hope you like it

Worst feeling

Smooth skin and freckles

It's all in her face

She knows, that she can

Have whoever she wants

When she wants

I take a deep breath

As she makes one more victim

It's just a magazine cover

But everyone likes it

And everyone cares

I'm second choice

And I know that

The comparisons kill me

Slowly

I wonder why I do this to myself

But after a while

It becomes an addiction

I want everything she is

And everything she has

Cause who I am is worthless

And that's the worst feeling

[kazyzs]

Just a song I wrote, hope someone somewhere likes it :)

- Yesterday -

I was your favorite

I was your everything

Then you decided

That I was nothing at all

Oh

You hit me like a bullet

I try to keep myself busy

Dinners and dresses

I smile at people

They smile back

Oh

But something's wrong

I go back to yesterday

Always and always again

I go back to yesterday

It's the only way I can see your face

again

And then it all repeats

I was your run or die

You were my bad boy

You were so careful

And then something changed your mind

...

[abnormall]

[beautifuldarkmind]

I’m jealous of those who can function like a normal human being. They don’t have anxiety holding them back from everything, they don’t struggle to get out of bed or have to put on an act that everything is fine when its not. They don’t struggle to hold friendships and relationships… they don’t feel sad for no fucking reason everyday. Those that can hold jobs and work towards their dreams, the ones who have self esteem and see the beauty in themselves. Those that know what its like to feel safe and secure, not insecure and fearful of it all. 

[kazyzs]

You want my body

The face contorted in pure pleasure

You want my kiss

Feel the contour of my waist

And yet you want everything

Less me

[kazyzs]

I tried to find love

In the arms of a stranger

Burning kisses

Of nights that never last

I found myself between tears and smiles

And promises that will never be kept

And in the end

There I was

Alone

[kazyzs]

I tried to create a pink world

In which I could lock myself behind a door

I tried to ignore all the screams

In low pleas that can barely be heard

I tried to tell you my reasons

I'm afraid you didn't hear

I tried to make myself present

But I was forgotten

Now you can find me in the back of your mind

A distant memory

Of someone who was once so present

[kazyzs]

My mind is a sweet torment

My actions are intentionally programmed

I spill lies disguised as kindness

For pure amusement

I'm a bored girl

[kazyzs]

I always hated the riddles

The mysteries

The suspense and the tension

But that was before, they came with

A pair of blue eyes

And a cigarette between the lips

[kazyzs]

Love will destroy us

I heard it once

On other airwaves

In other circumstances

Before I fell in love