O Captain! My Captain!

they/he | multifandomer

[kenkaneki224]

И если есть порох, дай огня

– 'Кукушка' by Кино

Dossier:

⇝ Jack (or Atticus works well too!)

⇝ they/he

⇝ currently 21 years old but emotionally, I still feel like I'm 15

⇝ eastern european girlie ✊🏻

⇝ i know multiple languages! I know Russian, English and currently learning Icelandic

⇝ im non-binary, bisexual and on the asexual spectrum so triple the identity and triple the hardship BUT a multitude of options for crushes 😌

⇝ yes im immune to peoples comments on who they consider attractive because me being on the asexual spectrum means that my fictional crushes WILL consist of the most decrepit men on the planet (I'm looking at you Count Orlok 👀)

--- Fandoms include ---

X-Men

Middle Earth

Good Omens

Doctor Who

Shadowhunters

Viktor Tsoi

Dead Poets Society

Rise of The Guardians

Yuri On Ice

Avatar (band, cartoon AND movies)

Sinners

Conclave

Nosferatu

Tokyo Ghoul

I really like to write about anything and everything especially about things that I'm interested in (obviously I would write about things that Im interested in), especially about things on my mind. So you can expect to see some think pieces relating to certain aspects of my fandoms!

If you're interested in that kind of stuff, definitely follow me on here but also on my letterbox because a lot of my reviews on there look like whole essays that include a lot of thought lol. I also plan to write some fanfics on ao3 in the future too (hopefully I get around to writing them lol) so follow me on there too!

twitter | pinterest | letterboxd | goodreads | discord | ao3

[kenkaneki224]

So, another ramble about Doctor Who again because I will forever be obsessed with it 👀.

My ramble is about this specific scene from s04,e2 “The Fires of Pompeii” and why it’s been on my mind for so long. So I feel like why this specific scene cuts so deep, well for me at least is because The Doctor saying that is supposed to be about the people of Pompeii but it can 100% also be understood as him also talking about Gallifrey and his own people. That if he could go back and save them [his own people], then he would, but he can’t AND if he could go back and save them [the people of Pompeii], then he would. But he can’t because both events are fixed points in time.

Tbh, when I first saw that scene, I thought he was only talking about his planet because he said that in reply to Donna saying “but your own planet… it burned” as to why they should at least save someone. Only later did I realise that the writers probably meant the people of Pompeii.

But at the same time, I think it’s so deep that it can be understood that maybe the writers were doing a play on words were you as the viewer can think that it’s both or even one or the other.

[kenkaneki224]

Found out that Dan and Phil are dating. I’m not even a Dan and Phil fan, never have been. Had to check out how the tumblr fam is doing.

[kaerujaki]

How many seconds in eternity?

[kenkaneki224]

[ another long essay about my thoughts on a certain fandom related event incoming ]

So I know Doctor Who's 'Interstellar Song Contest' was released MONTHS ago, I still have a lot of thoughts about that I want to get out there.

Even though there were aspects of that episode that I liked, I still have a major issue with an overarching element of the episode. My problem is the fact that the episode does mention why the 2 Hellion characters, Kid and Wynn decided to do what they were going to do but they just gloss over it if that makes sense? If anyone needs a reminder on why, it's because Kids and Wynns home planet of Hellia was colonised, the people were 'bought' alongside the planet, they robbed of all their Hell poppies, and then all of their fields were burned so that the population couldn't regrow what's stolen from them. All of that was committed by The Corporation as part of their honey selling brand, the same corporation and brand that's sponsors the contest. Not only that, but after their invasion they spread the propaganda to cover their awful actions that the population was evil, that they were a very dark and primitive population that practiced cannibalism. So even though at face value, of course killing 78 Trillion something people is obviously bad, BUT you do have to acknowledge that their main target was the Corporation and the contest that agreed to be sponsored by them.

At the same time, a part of me understands their anger towards the general population and specifically the people who tuned in to watch the contest. It's because in a way, they were kind of complicit, they knew what happened with Hellia, they knew that their resources were stolen and that now, the company that stole those resources and completely devastated a planet was sponsoring the contest. The same contest that they are watching and are inadvertently giving money to that company with their tickets/viewership.

It's just strange to me that all of that happens and all of that is explicitly mentioned, but the writers strangely decided to mention it and then have the rest of the plot and characters be indifferent to it? I feel like especially for the Doctor, it extremely mischaracterises him as a whole? Because for him to acknowledge the characters and know their story, for him to only punish them, not even just punish but literally torture them for something that they have yet to do while doing nothing to reprimand the actual people at fault that DID in fact commit something horrendous. I genuinely cannot stress this enough but The Corporation literally colonised an entire planet, forced the ENTIRE population to be their slaves and stripped them of their main/biggest resource on the planet and committed scorched earth, which is a war crime! I know the contest isn't on Earth but in space and space is basically "international waters" if we think about it, so the Geneva Conventions may or may not apply but I still wanted to mention it.

So my main point is that it's genuinely so strange to see the Doctor go after the victims of a genocide and torture them BUT not go after the overarching villain who destroyed an entire planet. As the Doctor, shouldn't he know how awful it is to have your entire planet and culture taken from you? Even if it's under different circumstances? He could sympathise with the Master/Missy even though we see the Master/Missy ACTUALLY do awful things, and I know that a reason as to why that is and that's because they're both the same species. But something that he has in common with both the Master and the Hellions is that they've both outlived a genocide of their planet, so shouldn't he be able to sympathise with both of them equally?

Overall, I think that the reason as to why I have such strong thoughts and opinions about this, even now is definitely because of the current climate in the world and my values and opinions about it all. So not only does my worldview shape how I see things that some may see and think "well it's just a show/movie, it's not that deep", to me its the opposite, if you watch a show, and it doesn't make you think about your own worldview or connect aspects of it to the real world, either its a bad show/movie, or you're just someone who just mindlessly consumes media which isn't a good thing. On the topic of the current climate, now that I think about it, its definitely strange that the writers decided to go the route that they did with that episode.

[001x456]

the idea that “you’re disrespecting the creators of your favorite characters if you—quote unquote—mischaracterize these characters in your fics or if you reduce them to horny sluts just for ship and smut” is so funny to me because

1. some canon creators made it explicitly clear that they can’t read fanfics people wrote about the characters they created, because, according to their own words, if they ever accidentally or subconsciously used anything from people’s fanfics in the source material of their works, then there might be a risk of them getting sued (yes, the characters are theirs and fans cannot monetize any works that have their characters in them, but fanfics—aka something fans created—belong to those fans, so if canon creators ended up making money off of those fanfics, then they could get into legal battles too).

2. fans don’t write fanfics to “honor or please” canon creators. there are other ways for them to do that if they want to. but fanfics have never been about “honoring or pleasing” canon creators. fanfics aren’t even about respecting canon creators or canon events, and I say this with respect. (what do you think tags like “alternate universe - canon divergence”, “fix-it”, “crack”, “porn without plot” on archive of our own stand for?)

fanfics are like this; imagine yourself as a raccoon and you see this delicious food people left on their porch for you. you look at it and think hmmm yummy. so you grab that food and then you run away with it to enjoy it in some comfort corner. you may choose to enjoy the food alone, or you may choose to share that food with your friends (but you cannot sell that food, because it’s originally someone else’s and you’re just eating/having fun with it). you may choose to dip that food in some spicy sauces that may or may not be suitable for that food and how it’s originally intended to be eaten. but hey! who cares if it’s suitable or not. if you like it then that’s all that matters.

3. canon—when it comes to fanfics—are not rules. as @allthingswhumpyandangsty has said before, canon are only suggestions. whether or not a fanfic writer will follow these suggestions is entirely up to them. because they write for fun. and it’s okay if they want to say “you know what? fuck canon”.

4. the concept of “mischaracterizing a character” overall is, in my personal opinion, not valid. because movies, books, tv shows, etc. are mainly about the interpretation of each viewer. you can interpret this character this way. other people can also interpret the same character differently. and there’s no “right or wrong” way to interpret a character when they’re all fiction and fantasies.

“you can write whatever you want, but people are free to find you weird, childish or disgusting” okay? I’ve never seen any writer say “you cannot find me weird, childish or disgusting🤬” because humans are gonna have thoughts and opinions about anything and everything, no matter how subconsciously those thoughts are.

I personally don’t believe art (be it fanfics or fan art) reflect artists’ moral compass or who they are in real life, but just like any other humans, I do have thoughts and I do find some things weird, childish or disgusting. instead of voicing my thoughts out loud, though, I choose to mute, block or ignore these things and focus my time and energy on things I like.

and it’s literally not an issue at all if some strangers on the internet, whose existence I don’t know about, find me weird, childish or disgusting. as long as they keep those thoughts to themselves, it’s totally fine. thought crimes are never real. it only becomes an issue when you start harassing people.

fandom is not about trying to police others.

fandom is about fun and knowing how to mute/block things you dislike instead of harassing others (and no, finding someone or something weird, childish or disgusting is not harassment as long as you keep those thoughts to yourself).

overall I love and respect every fanfic writer, no matter if the things they write is my cup of tea or not, because I think it’s beautiful how they love these characters and how they’re so passionate about these characters that they decide to make something for and from these characters. and as long as it makes them happy, they’re doing it right.

*this is a response to a funny ask that made me giggle today. also funny how anon chose not to show their face, because if they really believe they are right then surely there’s no need for them to hide behind anon.

[kenkaneki224]

Lately I’ve been thinking about X-Men and why I’ve always felt so weirdly drawn to the movies but I feel like I’ve finally figured it out and it’s not because I just liked the movies.

I feel like the reason why I've always been so fond of the X-Men and why the movies have always held a special place in my heart is because as someone who's LGBTQ+, I have always weirdly seen myself in them, in the X-Men and mutants in general.

Throughout the movies, mutants have always been "othered" and skewed by people in power to be these monsters and a danger to society that need to be taken care of, sounds familiar, right? And the thing is, it works! Many regular run-of-the-mill people buy it and develop genuine fear and hatred for mutants. But even then, before these people in power were fear-mongering, throughout history, people have hated and feared mutants even if they have never personally met a mutant and have only heard about them from whoever, and that’s because, like Nightcrawler said:

most people will never know anything beyond what they see with their own two eyes (X2 2003)

And that’s honestly how people in the real world view minorities and the marginalised, just as in the X-Men movies, people viewed mutants. But as you get to know the mutants, you realise that mutants are just people that, yes, are different, and some have powers that, if left uncontrolled, could be a potential risk. But despite that, most people don’t seem to realise that for the vast majority of mutants, their mutation doesn’t give them special powers; instead, their mutation only affects their appearance, so they genuinely pose no threat at all, not to say that mutants who have any kind of power should be hunted for sport by the government. Power-wielding mutants and non-power-wielding mutants alike, most are just people trying to live their lives while trying to navigate the world while managing their powers/mutations, and at the same time having the whole world looking at them through a magnifying glass and treating them like lab rats or something to be rid of or cured.

Sure, there are mutants out there that have developed a deep hatred for non-mutants like the Brotherhood of Mutants and view humans as close-minded, but can you really blame them? Some of their ideology is questionable, like their belief that nonhumans are inherently inferior, but when you look at their main objective, they want to rid the world of prejudice against mutants, even through very extreme methods. Why do I bring them up? Well, it’s because in X-Men and in real life, many people take a minority, find a group of people in that minority who do some wrong, and use it as a justification as to why a specific group needs to be taken care of and why that hate is justified. But even then, the more I think about it, despite the flaws of the Brotherhood of Mutants that are presented, at heart, the Brotherhood of Mutants is a revolutionary movement.

I could honestly say everything that I’ve said about the X-Men for other media that I happen to enjoy, whether it’s ghouls in the ‘Tokyo Ghoul’ manga and anime, or jinjuriki in the ‘Naruto’ manga and anime, or downworlders in the ‘Shadowhunter’ books and show. For all of them, the lack of understanding and the willingness to understand have led to their oppression; some may disagree, but due to my own experiences and life, it’s hard for me not to see these movies, shows, and books through that lens.

[kenkaneki224]

My weirdest Nosferatu theory is that Count Orlok’s hair isn’t actually real but instead a toupee to cover up his maggot wound on the top of his head. BUT he stuck it on the wrong side and just hasn’t noticed

[kenkaneki224]

Young trans saplings: *sees older man support trans rights*

Them all of a sudden: ♪ you are my daa-ad, you’re my dad! Boogie, woogie, woogie ♪

[kenkaneki224]

Do you ever watch a movie that you think is gonna be fun but by the end of it you’re left emotionally destroyed and devastated?

Because recently, I was watching Dead Poets Society and that’s genuinely how I felt 😭. It was pretty life changing though!

[cock-holliday]

People do not see masculinity as being as fluid and complex and nuanced as femininity and it’s annoying as hell. Because of patriarchy’s stranglehold on masculinity and radfem theory’s stranglehold on queer spaces, people really think with their whole heart that only femininity is subversive or experimental, or frankly, queer, and that masculinity is only a power grab and nothing more. Embarrassing!

[cock-holliday]

Below is a bunch of writings from a variety of genders, cis and trans, on queer masculinity:

Female Masculinity by Jack Halberstam (book pdf)

Butch is a Noun by S. Bear Bergman (book pdf)

Understanding the Bear Movement in Gay Male Culture by Eric Manley, Heidi Levitt and Chad Mosher Mcoun (essay)

Site to showcase image collections and exhibitions<br />

How I learned to embrace my masculine queer identity as a Black woman | GLAAD

For Spirit Day, GLAAD Campus Ambassador Grace Ancrum shares her experience with bullying and coming into her gender expression.

Under Construction: Decolonized Queer Masculinity(ies)

This is something that I have been discussing with close friends and working on what this means for myself.  As somebody who is considered a

To Be A Trans Man: A love letter to trans masculinity  - Mermaids

Mermaids’ Luan meets writer Ezra Woodger to talk about his new book, To Be A Trans Man 

[kenkaneki224]

THIS IS SO REAL. CAUSE LIKE… THE WAY THAT PEOPLE DONT VIEW MASCULINITY AS FLUID AND QUEER AS FEMININITY IS SO ANNOYING AND IT PISSES ME OFF SOMETIMES??

[kenkaneki224]

So I’m an editor and I wanna know if anyone know of any good sites to download/torrent shows? Like full seasons in 1080p and higher?? Cause I wanna make edits of one of my favourite shows, Shadowhunters and there’s barely any scenepacks on YouTube and if there is a scenepack, it’s very low quality and each clip is like 3 seconds max. Plus there’s this specific character that I wanna make an edit of from the show and there’s literally 0 scenepacks.

[kenkaneki224]

I’ve watched the Shadowhunters show a few months ago and I know that there’s the books and all, so my question is, should I read the books? 🤔 Cause like, tbh I really wanna read them and get to know more of the lore and I already got the first book a while ago. But deep down I’m kind of nervous to read the books because what if I don’t like them like I liked the show 😭. I probably will really like the books, bus someone tell me, are the Shadowhunters/Mortal Instruments books as good as people say???? 😩😩😩😩

[kenkaneki224]

Even though the greater demons in Shadowhunters are supposed to be like super evil and everything but I still can’t help and think of how fine they are 😩. Like…. they can try to murder me and my entire family and then 5 minutes later I’ll be like, “uhh.. soooo…. are any of y’all single by any chance? Cause I am and im down if yall are down 😌”

[malecloveforever]

Shadowhunters

Azazel

[thecrowinacrown]

I have watched 5 (FIVE) seasons of WHAT WE DO IN THE SHADOWS and JUST NOTICED that Nadja had a passport in Russian??? An USSR passport specifically?? Like???

Did you know???

[kenkaneki224]

OMG HOW DID I NEVER NOTICE THIS

[indashadows]

He would die without him. He would die for him. He trusts his life in those familiar hands.

[kenkaneki224]

If Nandor doesn’t realise his true feelings for Guillermo by the time the show actually ends then I’m going to lose it