āItās just a sprain and a few scratches, Cardan. Iāll be fineā I say, very well knowing that a dislocated shoulder and eleven stitches arenāt exactly a scratch, but also knowing my husband worries too much. About everything. Especially me. I should probably smack Vivi in the head for having him fly here like a maniac from Elfhame just because I got hit by a car, but moving kind of hurts right now. She also isnāt here, but Cardan is, losing his shit. āYou told me those nefarious machineries you call cars were perfectly safe. You also told me youād be back in a few hours. You told meāā his monologue is interrupted by a nurse, who looks at him from square to toe, taking in the crown he didnāt bother taking off before stepping into a mortal hospital demanding to see his wife, the way-too-big leather raincoat that belonged Heatherās father we gave him to better cover his tail - which I understand is a peculiar sight, in the middle of summer. āDo you mind turning the volume down, loverboy? there are patients trying to rest hereā she says, and before Cardan can start a different rant about how heās a king and she should watch her tone when speaking to him, I smile awkwardly and say āHeās sorry. Weāll be quite.ā The nurse doesnāt look convinced, but she leaves us alone. Cardan sighs. Here we go. āIām sorryā I provide, āitās not like I planned to get hit right outside the doorā I add, trying to keep my tone playful, but thereās no trace of humour in his eyes, and my heart breaks a little. He walks towards the bed and carefully sits next to me. I wouldnāt describe Cardan as a serious person, but there is a heaviness in his posture that I donāt see often, and Iāve come to learn what it means: Iāve scared him to death. āIāve been through it onceā he starts, then clears his throat as it breaks on the last word. āIāve been through it once, thinking Iād lost you. I wish I could explain to you what it does to me when you leave, even for a day. It doesnāt feel right.ā He pauses, licks his lips. I take his hand, because I want to. āAnd perhaps it is selfish of me, but you know that by now. If it were up to me I would never leave your side.ā I donāt say anything. Iām suddenly choked up. He traces his thumb over my knuckles and his ring propels an almost imperceptible chill down my spine, but Iām not so sure itās the metal. He finally looks me in the eyes. āI couldnāt bear it, Jude. Losing you. The thought alone makes me sick. So pleaseāā he swallows, ābe careful. Even if you think youāre perfectly safe, there are too many things that could go wrong. And I donāt accept any of it. I canāt.ā I thought I knew how Cardan felt about me, but his words are like a key opening a locked door, and they hit me like a brick in the face, and it is somehow ten times worse than the throbbing pain in my shoulder. He loves me so much, and values my life above everything else. āYouāre rightā I say quietly, holding his gaze. āI promise Iāll be more careful.ā He nods and presses a kiss to my knuckles, resting his forehead there. āAlthough now that Iāve been stabbed and been run over Iām starting to think faerie immortality is rubbing off onāā āThatās quite enough, my queenā his eyes wide with exasperation, but heās smiling. We both are.