[sirobvious]

I know that’s kind of the go-to thing to show that a vampire character is “one of the good ones” or whatever but it actually seems a little bit more fucked up for a vampire to steal blood from a blood bank than for a vampire to attack people for blood, at least as long as it’s not the kind of vampire where a bite is instantly lethal like it never stops bleeding. 

People can recover from losing some blood but blood bank blood is constantly in short supply and is reserved for people who imminently need blood transfusion of a specific blood type or else they die.

[buckskinblues]

I also hate the “I can just substitute human blood with animal blood” like the whole idea of vampirism sort of hinges on the fact the only thing you can feed off of are humans.

[sirobvious]

YOU get it

[sirobvious]

Once you start having vampires subsist on animals, well, like, so do humans. In fact the average human probably eats more animals per year than most of the animal-blood-drinking vampires I’ve seen depicted.

That’s not a vampire, all you’ve written is an immortal superhuman who subsists on…food, even if it’s a bit undercooked. That’s a fucking elf.

[sirobvious]

Some of y’all’s ideas of other options for “ethical” vampires is insane.

“Ethical vampires should feed on criminals.” So it is ethical for a person to get death penalty without trial and/or to be literally consumed by other citizens as punishment for a crime? That’s the prison-industrial complex.

[drinkbreak]

Ok so I have thought about this extensively. I have come up with a solution to the ethical vampire dilemma that covers pretty much all the bases.

How do you get blood from a human source consensually, without attracting negative attention?

Trendy high end spa.

Advertise a revitalizing blood detox facial. Spas are always doing these kinds of wacky treatments. It’s gimmicky and attention grabbing enough to draw in the upper class. Vampire gets daily blood, and the “victims” pay large amounts of money to give it to them. Spa is highly praised for its luxurious and unique services and draws in more customers

I am certain this would work

[porcelain-dollbones]

“i have come up with an ethical solution: a healthcare scam that steals people’s blood”

[bramblepatch]

It's very funny to me that the stereotypical gelatinous cube is bright fucking green when the monster itself is almost perfectly transparent. Like its gimmick is that it's a monster that imitates an empty 10x10 hallway. How many people have fallen victim to gelatinous cubes because they "know" that the ooze is bright green and so don't bother to check the suspiciously clean corridor in front of them.

[thepioden]

The cube is green because oh my god do you know how hard it is to draw a perfectly transparent cube? Especially in isolation, like in the monster manual? Even if you put debris in, it reads as "floating skull ft. helium sword." Awful. Absolutely wretched.

[bramblepatch]

I'm picturing it appearing in in-universe bestiaries with a little caption like *specimen dyed for visibility.

Dungeon naturalists sneaking up on a cube with a bucket of green dye so they can see it well enough to study it.

[thepioden]

Classifying your Slimes and Oozes by Gram staining them

[theblackparadeisdead]

Also if you regularly work with kids/teens I cannot stress how important it is that you know someone who's like really into lame emo junk. There was a girl my dad was working with who just flat out refused to talk to adults or anyone at all and one day I was there and I saw her wearing a homemade bracelet that had beads that said YLDNDAHFHHACYCSYCDAYDKK and since I was also once a 14 year old making niche homemade mcr merch I was like "oh my god you like dnd Audrey Hepburn Fangoria Harry Houdini and croquet you cant swim you can't dance and you dont know karate!!!" and she looked at me like I'd said literal magic words and now we talk about music all the time

[theblackparadeisdead]

If you're working with troubled kids you need several people trained in child psychology with godlike levels of patience and at least one person who knows five nights at freddys lore front to back

[valtsv]

i know that when a book describes dragons picking up their riders they probably mean scruffing them by the neck in their mouths like a kitten, but i always imagine something like this

[takeadeepbreathandexist]

Don’t leave this in the tags. It’s too funny not to be enjoyed by everyone

[bloodstainedmuzzle]

Resident Evil 4 Remake (2023) Leon S. Kennedy [ 1 / ??? ]

[palm-top-tiger-deactivated20240]

[standardhiba]

[spectrometrie]

i love how this is anything but a diy craft

[queen-mihai]

I see Tumblr finally canceled the porn ban

[roninnozlo]

the original poster is here

it’s 5.5x as long.

this “diy & crafts exclusive” motherfucker is a liar, and Rescue & Restore definitely did not consent to this.

[beardedmrbean]

Original blog post

Le important day in meme history has arrived

[alamuts-lair-of-madness]

And Internet history was made.

[ms-demeanor]

Here she is in November 2023 celebrating her 18th birthday and being a very good doge.

[lizluvscupcakes]

[ampervadasz]

[sergle]

freesias / simple leaves for the series. 🌼🌼 please don’t tag as me/kin, thank you! | ko-fi

[useless-finlandfacts]

Some cheerful places in Finland

[whattodowhenyouaredead]

[powerburial]

this is actually the scariest thing ive seen in a long time

[canisalbus]

✦ Cockroach ✦

[tiktokstowatch]

[mybigfatgaylife]

plot twist

[cipheramnesia]

kinder surprise

[sour-charity]

the plot chickens

[log6]

STOP MAKING ME LOOK AT THE WHITE HAIRED SLUT FROM BALDURS GATE

[everlastingrandom]

got blood work done today and i just remembered a time i got blood work done as a teen. after the nurse drew like 6 vials of the stuff, i asked him “is all that mine?” and he said “not any more” and walked off

[canisalbus]

✦ Epistaxis ✦

[just-french-me-up]