Kill Dragons Get Money

[kill-dragons-get-money]

Blake's sacrifice

blake decided to take dhulfagar onto himself after dhulfagar did unspeakable and uncalled for things to aliona

blake:listen dhulfagar. you want to knock someone up, i can be knocked up, and i want you off aliona. lets make a deal, you give me a shot, and we can see what happens.

dhulfagar:agreed

blake:ok. cum at me bro.

[kill-dragons-get-money]

Well, THATS hot.

Winne after she set blakes ass on fire by accident during a battle, all because she was staring at blakes ass and decided to use prismatic ray

[kill-dragons-get-money]

Is it a evil bird?

asks the rogue as he shots a small bird by mistake 

[kill-dragons-get-money]

blake learns Drow:

blake sat there with yuffi’s ginormous book of information she had collected repeating phrases and words in the foreign language

“you’re saying that wrong.” namine yuffi’s daughter stated blake repeated it again only to be smacked in the head with one of namine’s tentacles

“you’re saying it wrong!”

yuffi would later turn around and see blake being beaten with her daughters tentacles at the complete mercy of the child.

[kill-dragons-get-money]

haha, nah winne can't be pregn- ...SHE'S WHAT!?

blake finding out that he’s going to be a father

[kill-dragons-get-money]

Words of the Paladin

“After we kill their mother in cold blood we can raise the children away from evil.”

[kill-dragons-get-money]

fuck this im a tank

yuffi in general

[kill-dragons-get-money]

HEY! NO ONE CAN EAT WINNE BUT ME

blake reacting to a drider trying breastfeed off of winne (blake admittedly thought they were trying to eat winne)

[kill-dragons-get-money]

Like mother Like daughter

Akhali goes to secretly eat dead bodies in order to bring them back as minions. Her daughter Namine sees mom doing this and bites of the head of the undead follower she summoned. “NOM!”

Poor Zero sees Akhali’s daughter do this and becomes even more insane.

Yuffi asks Akhali why Namine would do this. Akhali just shrugs.

[kill-dragons-get-money]

Blake’s butt is always touched

Winne falls into the lava, she grabs the first thing she sees, she grabs blake's butt

[kill-dragons-get-money]

I'm a fucking dwarf, do I look like an acrobatic?

Our dwarf cleric says after he failed his balance check and falls into lava and loses his beard again.

[kill-dragons-get-money]

Are you goat man? Motherfucker.

Juba’s character says as he questions a npc. 

[kill-dragons-get-money]

“i touch Blakes butt”

that was what lady Yuffi stated as Blake was healed of all their wounds they received mid battle. hearing this Balthazar screams that he teleports to Blake and also touches his butt (he has magical teleporting boots)  soon the entire party hopped on the band wagon jokingly stating that they all touched blakes butt when from the other side of the map, away from the fighting and butt touching Winne screams

“THATS.MY.BUTT” it seems Winne was a bit territorial and jealous that Blake was receiving so much attention for their bootylicious booty

[kill-dragons-get-money]

Now it's double the red!!

Balthazar, the barbarian, says as Sigarek, the other barbarian, kills a red bird who becomes extremely bloody

[kill-dragons-get-money]

Wait. Blake has a what now...???

Amber realizing that winne used polymorph before she and blake started having sex

[kill-dragons-get-money]

Dragon Blood Bath

Towards our second trip to the spring of bravery, We come across a room with a spring of dragon blood. Our Cleric Dwarf sticks his finger in the said dragon blood, and starts screaming at the sudden pain he had just acquired. The Dwarf basically says lets try something else. and he jumps into the pool of blood. He comes out of the dragon blood screaming in agony and skin melting off as his dwarfen beard sheds from his face. As he tries to heal himself he could not because of the constant screaming and messing up the spells as he goes “abracabrAAAAHHHHHHHHHH” We all say our good byes to said dwarf, since he is obviously dead. However our Paladin heals him and he becomes scabbed everywhere on his body. The only thing that is wrong is he lost his clothes and his pride along with his beard.

[kill-dragons-get-money]

what. she was SEXY.

cj’s response to amber commenting on the 2nd knocked up paladin