·𖥸· ─────── · · berri/ri. twenty. she/her. south asian. multifandom. intp. med student.
i enjoy rain, genshin impact, wuwa, classic literature & fantasy genre, painting (watercolour for now) & sketching, classical dance forms (used to do bharatnatyam), plants and anything spicy. and also writing (ofc) · · ─────── ·𖥸·
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✘. BYF (under the cut)
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ahem so , this has been a long hiatus, and a very sudden one too. i apologise for it.
med school is tougher and more stressful than i thought, living alone in an unknown city and tackling so much at once drains me at the end of the day. its taking me time to get used to this pressure and rush, i like it, but its tiring.
but as its clear, i don't have time to write, at all. my mind doesn't have space to accommodate ideas or even think of them. i try and i try to jot it down somewhere, hoping i would get time to write a new work, or continue my wips. but it has been impossible so far.
i have been thinking about it, a permanent leave had been the decision, but writing is my passion. i cannot leave it either. i still love reading fanfics and writing, and its still tough for me to part with it.
so the end note is, i would continue to be on a hiatus, being active is not an option. there is a very small chance i would ever continue any of my series (i know i hate this too), but i would continue to drop one shots, or drabbles, which would also be rare. but i might. it all depends on the holidays and how free my weekends are.
i apologise for all who had been waiting for updates on my series, i know how frustrating it is as a reader to see the stories you like are not getting continued. really sorry for that.
it could be that in the future i really might consider leaving, but i hooe it doesn't come to that.
i finished the new archon quest and OMGGGGG!!!! there's like so much to unpack here but the little things that stuck with me so much is the lively and sarcastic interactions (yes nefer and lauma WAS I ONLY ONE TO SEE THE TENSION??!?!?!?)
this is your sign to go write. i'm not talking about making a cute pinterest board or playlist, thats for the procrastinators. OPEN YOUR DOCUMENT AND WRITE THAT THANG
a small comfort fic as requested by anon! i needed some comfort too. (im sorry i took so long and please forgive me if its shorter than what you expected. enjoy! :D )
"there you are. i have been looking everywhere for you." flins called out, his usually dull tone taking a delightful turn, as it always does around you.
he slowly strolls towards you, an almost anticipatory smile on his face, not that something was going to happen, he was just excited to be with you. it always made you feel a little silly and giggly about how easy it is to make him happy.
but his happy gait paused, so did his smile, when he saw you didn't carry the same smile. you weren't happy, you tried to look it, tried to look okay but he knew it was all a pretense for him. your eyes were distant and dim, and his lips wilted at the sight.
he sat down beside you on the soft lush grass, letting the silence settle in for a while. then, his eyes flickered to you as his arm settled on his propped up knee.
"might i know the reason to your frown?" he questioned softly, his eyes looking gentle and warm as his hand stayed beside you, not touching yet as he awaited your consent.
your brows furrowed in slight alarm, and you tried to laugh it off, "im not frowning, kyryll. what makes you say that?"
"you called me by my name and not honey." he said, his lips tugging up as you laughed quietly and to his relief, it seemed a bit genuine.
"im not frowning, honey." you repeated with a smile but he only gave you a silent side eye with that knowing smile, and there dropped your pretense.
"alright... i just-" you shrugged as you lifted your hands to rub your forearms, shrinking up as your smile faltered to a sigh. "well, its nothing big but— so last week, there was this- this— uhm-" your lips started quivering and that only made you more frustrated, sighing sharply as you tried to breathe deeply. "i-im sorry but can i not—"
"yes i apologise. i apologise— come here." he whispered immediately, gently pulling you in his lap and wrapping his arms around you. just as you settled in his embrace, your arms wrapped around his shoulders tightly, hiding your face in his neck.
"im sorry its just— a bit harder to speak right now—" you sniffed and tried to regulate your breathing, "and its so frustrating—"
"i understand, yes. its alright." he pressed a kiss on your temple, a hand caressing your hair, "you do not need to tell me right now. its okay now."
your hands seemed to tighten more at his soothing voice, as if clinging to the one source of peace in your life. guilt seeps in your chest, making the lump in your throat pain even more.
"im sorry okay? f-for all this—"
"hush now, you do not have anything to apologise for. if i cannot shoulder your burden, if i cannot lessen your pain... then what lover would i be?" he whispered gently and hummed, pressing another kiss.
you paused for a moment, his words making all the pain vanish in an instant. that is his magic, he is that steadfast anchor in your life that never lets you fall.
".... this is not the time for you to be poetic, silly." you smiled against his neck, and that caused him to mirror your smile, "yet i know that is exactly what you love. i can deduce that by the rapidly increasing sound of your heartbeat—"
"that is so creepy!" you groan with a helpless smile and he laughs loudly, rich and melodious.
"it is not! i can assure the whole nod krai can hear it—"
"kyryll!"
the mere sound of his laughter is enough to distract you from the dull pain and make your eyes glued to him in a yearnful gaze. yet again you thank the stars, for whatever good you did to get him. you could only hope to cherish him as deeply he cherishes you.
and unknown to you, he feels a similar emotion. the mere notion of your sadness makes that steady part of him falter. he can fight anything, endure anything, anything but your tears. for he has vowed to keep his most cherished blessing, you, always happy.
pairing: ex!dick grayson x ex!reader + platonic!jason
cw: they're exes if you haven't noticed, yearner!dick grayson, mc is doing great in life and dink isn't that's it that's the fic, will they get back together? won't they? read and find out!!!, hints to alcoholism/heavy drinking, strong language
wc: 1,683
⟢ the breakup between you both was messy. it was bound to be - you were so deep into each other's lives that the breakup affected those around you. he'd spent so much time around your family, and you'd spent so much time at the manor that you considered each other's family to be your own family.
you hadn't spoke to any of dick's brothers since the split, but it was valid since they had witnessed the very argument that spelled the end of your relationship.
the argument was so stupid. it had started over nothing and just spiralled into something so much worse - a screaming match in the middle of wayne manor that ended in you storming out of the mansion.
it started simply with dick mentioning offhandedly (although, his tone felt snide) that you weren't as loud with your love as he was. by the end, you were screaming and picking away at each other's insecurities in front of his entire family.
you knew it wasn't your fault - at his original comment, all you'd said back to him was that you preferred the more quiet and tender moments that nobody else gets to see. that that was what true love felt like. and apparently he'd taken that the wrong way.
now, you were sitting alone in your new apartment. it was completely unfurnished and bare of any life, since you'd abandoned most of your stuff in dick's apartment on the other side of the city. you felt like you were in some stupid 2000s movie with the way you were sat in day old pyjamas and cradling a tub of ice cream like it was sacred.
you occasionally checked the notification bar on your phone - calls and messages from your mother, your friends, jason, and tim all expressing their own concerns over you. although for jason you couldn't exactly say concerned - he was more saying that his brother was 'a dickhead, and an idiot for fumbling.'
dick still had your cat. your precious little baby girl, and you needed her more than ever right now. but your pride was getting in the way of going back to dick's apartment and demanding he handed her over.
part of you considered breaking your already week-long silence to the world by asking jason or tim to go to dick's apartment and steal her. you knew they would - especially jason. he'd do anything to go out of his way and annoy dick.
with a final spoonful of your ice cream, you picked up your phone and sent jason a short but sweet message - 'can u pls get my cat from your bro.'
before you could even turn your phone off again and place it face down, the screen lit up with a response from jason - 'rn?'
of course you could always trust your ex's little brother to get the job done. you sent him a simple thumbs up in return, and 30 minutes later, jason was knocking on the front door of your apartment.
the only problem was that he didn't have your cat. when you swung your door open and didn't see her, you sent jason a teary glare. he raised his hands frantically when he clocked that you were about to cry, "listen, dick wouldn't let me take her-"
"and you just let him keep her?!" you sobbed, jason looking more and more lost as you continued to cry. he looked around your barren apartment sheepishly, "he was clinging onto that thing like his life depended on it! trust me, i tried."
you turned back around to enter your apartment as reality sunk in - your evil, evil ex was holding your cat hostage, and not even the red hood could save her from his grasp.
jason followed you into your apartment awkwardly, "so.. how've you been?"
"how do you think i've been?" you all but snapped as you sank back into the couch, "sorry."
jason nodded slowly as he settled on the other end of your couch, "nah, it's okay. breakups are.. hard.."
he patted his thighs awkwardly as you both sat in silence - something he wasn't used to with you, "would you ever consider talking to him? or, at least unblock his number?"
you whipped your head around to him, "are you serious?"
"so that's a no," jason hummed, "is that a solid no or would you consider talking to him again after some time apart-"
he was abruptly interrupted by you lobbing a cushion straight for his head, "you heard the things he said to me, jason! the things he said about me! he can't just.. take all of that back and apologise as if we haven't been dating for five years."
jason winced at that, "yeah, that's what i thought you'd say."
when he noticed you were about to cry again, he quickly changed the subject, "your apartment's.. nice."
"don't lie," you sighed, looking around the place - it was run down and bare of life, "it's a dump, jason."
jason suddenly got up from his seat, clearly done with the awkwardness of the conversation and the heaviness of everything unspoken, "well, i've got to run. y'know, vigilante stuff."
you simply waved him off, and he quickly left, as if your sadness was contagious.
˚₊‧꒰ა ✦ ໒꒱ ‧₊˚
15 minutes before,
jason's fist thudded on the front door of you and dick's shared apartment - well, now it was just dick's apartment. that's gonna be weird for him to think about. nobody at the manor had processed the breakup either yet, not even damian or bruce.
after a few moments of silence, jason raised his fist to beat on the door again, but before he could, the door swung open to reveal his brother. jason visibly cringed at the sight of him.
dick grayson had clearly seen better days than this - he was clearly wearing pyjamas that were days old, his hair was a mess, and his eye bags were like panda eyes. the two looked at each other, taking the sight of each other in before jason finally broke the silence, "you look rough."
dick groaned, not doing anything to stop jason from elbowing his way into the apartment, "no, jason, it's fine, come in. make yourself at home."
jason looked around the apartment and winced at the sight of it - the apartment which was once so full of life had never been as dull as this. all the photos in the apartment that had you in it were either taken down or turned face down. there were also some empty beer bottles littered across the coffee table.
jason bristled at the sight of the place, before his gaze landed on your cat who was quietly lounging in her cat tree and observing her co-owner and the guest.
"she wants her cat back," jason spoke, jumping straight to the point, "she's in a bad place, dick."
dick walked up to the cat and pet her gently, the cat edging away slightly from his touch as if she knew what was going on and wanted to return to you, "if she wants her cat back that bad she can come get her herself."
jason groaned and buried his face in his hands, "i'm not doing this, dick, i'm not going between you both like some messenger."
dick moved in front of the cat tree possessively (although to jason, it just looked comical), "jason, you're not taking this cat. did she seriously send you here to get her cat just so she wouldn't have to see me?"
"well i think she's right to do that," jason grumbled, "you said some pretty nasty stuff to her the last time you saw her."
dick folded at the reminder of what happened, "i know i did. gosh, i'm such an idiot, jason."
"yeah, you are," jason agreed, settling down on dick's couch. calling it his brother's couch felt wrong - he knows it was you who chose the furniture. he shouldn't give his brother all the credit, "have you even dropped her a message? tried to apologise?"
dick slumped onto the couch beside him in defeat, "of course i have, jason. i think she blocked me, none of my messages are going through. shit.. what am i going to do?"
jason looked between dick and your cat, still sat elegantly watching the conversation unfold without a care in the world, "listen. i'll take her cat back, and i'll try convince her to unblock you. the rest is up to you."
dick weighed his options, "but the cat stays here."
"no," jason pinched the bridge of his nose, "this whole plan relies on me taking the cat to her new apartment, dick."
"you know where her new apartment is?!" dick basically lit up - the most optimistic jason had seen him in a long time. jason considered the pros and cons of telling his older brother your new address before sighing, "dick, i can't tell you where her apartment is. just let me take her cat to her, she really needs it, man."
dick looked at him defiantly, turning his nose up like a child, "absolutely not. if she wants her back, she can come get her herself."
jason let out a sigh of resignation before moving from the couch, making his way to the front door, "you obviously have a few drinks in you. i know what your play is with the cat - you think if you hold the thing hostage, she'll come back here, right?"
when dick stayed silent, jason continued, "thought so. listen, i'll go to her apartment and try to get her to unblock you, but i think she's pretty adamant about not talking to you right now."
"and she really wants that cat back!" jason called as he slammed the front door shut, leaving dick alone again with his thoughts. he laid back on the couch, dwarfing it with his height and leaving his legs leaning off of the arm rest at the end.
the apartment that was once lively and full of love had never felt so cold. it felt so drained of colour, as if it were also mourning the end of the relationship.