it's been a while
So it's been nearly or over a year since I last posted something. I don't know, I've not checked.
But in that year a lot has happened. The most recent being my husbands complete dicking over due to his mental illness (big giant suck fest) and a hoot recent of my brother in laws wedding.
I am no longer working as a little slave in a shop full of people who hated me and made it painfully clear they did, more often than not reducing me to tears in front of customers, I now work for a brilliant company that sees something in me. Oh and I wrestle. I am training to be a professional wrestler.
Now don't get me wrong, my lovely illnesses get in my way, but I'm so used to them now that I tend to push them aside and get on with it. Along with this my cardio is terrible and five laps of the court leaves me breathless and needing my inhaler, but every training session I give it everything I have until sweat drips onto the floor along with my spit. (Isn't planking fun?)
I just wish I could get my husband to do that. Not planking, unless he wants some uber core strength, but put his everything into pulling himself out and away from this pit of depression he's currently residing in. I almost feel like he's picked out new rugs and curtains for his stay and won't be popping his head above water for a while. Which is an issue, because if he doesn't we will both drown.
So when I left my last job i was extremely unceremoniously fired. On the spot. No warning etc. Just a simple you're out. I then got told by everyone that I would never ever get another job and I should go work in the factory near to my house. Pulling myself out of there was difficult, but I did it, and holy shit am I proud of that. Now with hbs problem, I'm helping. I'm throwing him ropes, ladders, crates, elevators, everything I can and he's just looking at them like “"well what am I supposed to do with that?” And trust me when I say explaining doesn't help. “"Use them to get yourself out” may as well be me saying “"this is an extremely convoluted puzzle I have designed for your own personal tortue” as the reaction is the same. Nope. Nope. Nope.
I wish I knew the answer. I wish I could explain the answer. I wish I could help.
