I'm a 35+ animal loving, binge watching mid westerner. Also a paranormal junkie 👻 Currently obsessed with Lou Ferrigno, Jr & BuckTommy on 911 ! Also Henry Cavill in all his movies (esp Night Hunter), Jensen Ackles in all his shows/roles as well as Cockles 😁
Tommy rolled his shoulders and stretched out his neck before knocking on Evan’s door. He was stiff and achy after a long shift to end a long week. The hot shower he’d taken after work had mostly served to make him more tired, but there was no way in hell he was gonna cancel on Evan.
They’d only recently decided to give things another chance. They’d gone on a handful of dates, but tonight was the first time they were spending the evening in one of their homes.He was trying to go into it without expectations. Physical chemistry had never been their problem. Emotional intimacy, however, hadn’t kept up at the same rate. And there was something intimate about being in someone’s space, having a meal they prepared. He’d really missed having that with Evan, and not just because he was incredible in the kitchen.
Evan pulled open the door and his face lit up in a way Tommy strived to actually deserve. Tommy soaked up the warmth of it like a sponge.
“Hey Tommy. Come in,” Evan smiled, stepping aside. He was wearing an apron over his jeans and sweater, which looked so much hotter than it had any right to be.
Tommy stepped inside and greeted Evan with a kiss. Evan let his hand rest on Tommy’s waist for just a moment before he shut the door. The casual touch left a lingering warmth against his skin.
“So, should I start with the tour?” Evan asked, gesturing around himself at the house. It was the first time Tommy had been past the front door of Evan’s new place.
The tour only took a few minutes. It wasn’t a huge place. They didn’t even cross the threshold into the primary bedroom, like it just wasn’t the right time to do so.
Evan’s new place was so different from the loft. Tommy had always loved Evan’s loft. The location had been great - right in the heart of everything. The view was gorgeous. It held the sentimental value of being the first place they’d kissed. It held a lot of firsts.
Unfortunately, Tommy’s last memory of it would always be the night he walked away.
This house was different. It was warm, full of life and art, pictures and books in a way the loft just wasn’t set up to be. It felt settled and lived-in with the clutter and knick-knacks. There was a reassurance permanence to it that he didn’t feel at the loft.
He didn’t like to think much about where Evan had lived in between. That night they’d run into each other at the bar, sex on a mattress on the floor that Tommy wasn’t so sure his back ever recovered from, and a morning that had started so full of hope crumbling around them. It was something they’d since talked about - picked apart, explained, apologized - but it wasn’t a memory Tommy would ever be fond of.
“Can I get you anything to drink?” Evan offered as they went back to the kitchen, the meal Evan had been preparing still safely simmering on the stove. “I have water, soda….oh and I found a non-alcoholic beer that’s pretty decent if you wanna try it.”
“Water’s fine,” Tommy said, yawning once Evan’s back was turned. He leaned tiredly against the countertop. Maybe he should have opted for something with caffeine to wake him up. He’d probably be fine once he ate something.
“Your neck okay?” Evan asked, holding the water glass out to Tommy. He hadn’t even realized he was rubbing it again.
“Uh, yeah,” he said, unconvincingly.
Evan gave him a look, but didn’t push it, just handed over the water glass.
*****
Buck was going to ask Tommy if he’d make the salad, but the guy seemed exhausted. He leaned heavily against the counter, yawning when he thought Buck wasn’t looking. He was clearly trying, for Buck’s sake. And while Buck appreciated it, he was ready to pack the food up to go and send Tommy home to sleep.
“How was your shift?” Buck asked while he chopped some lettuce and dropped it into a salad bowl.
“Hmm?” Tommy asked, looking over at him.
“Your shift,” Buck repeated gently. “Was it okay?”
“Oh, yeah,” he said, putting the water glass down on the counter. He squinted a bit at the light and rubbed his eyes.
Buck put his knife down and frowned. Something was off. “Are you feeling okay? You…you don’t seem okay.”
“No,” Tommy said quietly, with sudden honesty. “I think I’m getting a migraine.”
Buck’s heart sank with sympathy. “Oh, shit, I’m sorry. You should go home and rest. We can do this another time.”
Tommy paused, looking unsure, embarrassed. “I don’t…can I lie down here for a bit?” he asked, squeezing his eyes shut. “I don’t think I can make it home.”
God, he’d probably been feeling it since he arrived and Buck hadn’t noticed. “Of course. Yeah. Come on,” he said.
Buck quickly turned off the stove, then turned off the kitchen lights. He’d never had a migraine himself but he knew light didn’t help. And with the way Tommy’s shoulders relaxed a small amount indicated he’d made the right call.
Tommy started toward the living room to lie down on the couch, but Buck gently put an arm around his back, which made Tommy wince. “You’ll be more comfortable in my room.”
Thankfully, Tommy didn’t protest as Buck led him back to the bedroom. It was already dark, so Buck carefully guided him onto the bed to lay down. Tommy sighed heavily, his body still tense.
“D-do you have any medication? Does this happen a-a lot?”
“No, and no,” Tommy said, his voice low and tight, like he was in pain. “Maybe some ibuprofen? Or whatever you have.”
Buck went into the bathroom and closed the door before he turned the lights on. He pulled out a bottle of ibuprofen and shook a couple out into his hand, filled the water glass he kept in the bathroom, then turned off the light before he came back out.
Tommy sat up enough to take the pills, then lay back down. Buck sat on the edge of the bed, not sure what else to do. He reached out to touch Tommy’s hair, but Tommy pulled away.
“Hurts too much,” Tommy said, as if through clenched teeth.
“Sorry,” Buck said helplessly. “Does….does ice help?”
“Yeah.”
“O-okay,” Buck said. “I’ll get you some.”
Buck looked through his supply of ice packs in the freezer until he found the one he wanted. It was gel, soft and pliable, not too heavy. He wrapped it in a clean towel and brought it back into the bedroom. With steady, gentle hands, he placed the ice pack over Tommy’s forehead.
Tommy let out a soft noise, something like thanks.
“I wish I knew what to do,” Buck said quietly, more to himself.
Tommy shivered, so Buck picked up the throw blanket from the foot of the bed and lay it over Tommy. He could tell Tommy was in pain, that it was getting worse instead of better, and he felt utterly helpless. He wanted to wrap his arms around him and hold him tight, because that’s what he would want. There was no better feeling than being in Tommy’s arms.
He’d missed him so damn much and he knew Tommy had missed him the same. They’d both tried dating other people but nothing had felt right, not the way they’d felt to each other.
Buck wanted to do it right this time. They both did. Part of that was slowing down, talking, asking questions, and listening. Slowing down was hard. Buck had wanted to jump in again with both feet.
Tonight felt so important. Buck had agonized over what to cook and second guessed himself. He’d thrown that anxious energy into cleaning his house, top to bottom. He wanted to show Tommy who he’d become over the last year and share the life that he was so proud of.
Of course, he’d had other hopes too. He’d missed the feeling of Tommy’s skin against his and the weight of Tommy’s body on top of him.
None of that was on his mind now. He just wanted to take Tommy’s pain away.
“Do you want to be alone?” Buck asked.
“No.”
“What else can I do for you?”
“Hold my hand?” Tommy said, his voice quiet and strained. “Everything hurts but…I want to feel you here.”
Buck immediately reached for Tommy’s hand. He kept his touch soft, just a light press of his fingertips against the inside of Tommy’s wrist. Gently reassurance that he wasn’t alone. Something in Tommy uncoiled with relief and he sighed.
Buck stayed, watching Tommy’s features relax in the dark, the gentle beat of his pulse slowing beneath Buck’s fingertips as he drifted off to sleep.
True story !! I used to take care of a neighbor's adorable morkie (maltese/yorkie) and he was given Cheerios as a treat for going potty outside. He got ridiculously excited about getting his Cheerios, it was so cute 🥰😂
