Dear Lucky

21 and peaked

[kr36]

Light

We don’t lose our light, we only misplace it in the dark

We waste energy in hatred when it’s as simple as lacking love

We search for love on avenues where street lights weren’t placed, and where other lost souls fumble in the absence of light

We stare into the sun, trying to absorb as much light as we can, blinding ourselves in the process

We are not the hell fires below, nor the stars above

We are here on this earth

We look so far ahead that we lose tack of the present

We stay focused on the past that we forget to move on

We are here, why should we live in our minds, if we have a whole world to live in?

[kr36]

Don’t ever forget, your life is what you make of it, your choices and time are and should of your own accord. As people we must learn to value ourselves more than opinions. To value our time more than everyone else’s. It’s never too late to try. We must be impeccable with our word, we should never take things personally, we should never make assumptions; more important than anything, we must always try our best. Our best will never be the same day to day, but all that matters is that it is our best. Should we do this, Love can be spread. You’re only as good as the love in your heart, the beauty your eye can see, and the optimism you can spread. Never give up.

[kr36]

To everyone that’s working a low paying job and are under six feet tall you can do it too, okay? This shit is not just for professional athletes, alright.

[kr36]

This is me

You see, the loop is you gave the group kid a pencil & paper, and from there he realized he was greater on his own

Outsider to all, and an insider to one he learned to maneuver the world causing a racket; gaining attention from those by which he was shunned

Writes down every thought and every emotion, puts it on display and still no one knew the kid was broken

Walking around with a chip on the shoulder, but still people want to play and understate the state of distress he was left in by the leaders of the new Reich

Bastards swarming in spilling the feelings of innocents, killing the confidence of adolescents surrounding the premise

So he was left out, alone in the world, a fucking menace, he turned and looked to the road, and from that view he took his position, and dropped his vision with every sentence he could mutter into existence

Remember me as you thought I was, then read my writings and realized you looked at my life with closed eyes

[kr36]

Dear life, most days I truly believe we should’ve parted ways. Dear life, I’ve gone from contemplating to trying, to contemplating, to aimlessly firing. I hope you know I don’t hate you; in reality, you have everything that’s ever called to me. Dear life, I don’t think you realize how hard I’ve tried, not at one thing, but the other, in both instances. These sentences are all I have left, and even then, I’ve lately been without much thought. Days pass and fail to see the differences, either than one day I’m tagged in and the next day I’m tagged out Dear life, practically everyday I sit in a corner and waste away, silently pray. Dear life, I’ve used you and abused those you’ve sent my way, it’s not how I choose to live, but it’s what it had to give Dear life, I’ve given careful consideration, and I can say without a doubt, it was never just a freak occasion because I still don’t want to live this life.

[kr36]

Kal

These lights lights flashing flashing

And simultaneously my circuits start crashing

I know the words to say

But it seems my lungs have given way

I can't breathe or speak let alone tell you what I think

From the dark depths of my mind I scatter for the napoleonic complex to fight for the courage to carry on without rest

But it seems at my best I can't continue, I only seem to regress

I have my white towel waving swallowed by the dark, but I need no saving, I found my home in hells park

A million miles away from society and it's all seeing eye; designed to watch lie after lie fly by, and let the hopes and dreams of all rise and fall

But down here it's safe from all that

here where my heart lays to sleep eternally

here in the darkness where I grow

Here with the monster I created to take control

[thegoodvybe]

[kr36]

April 9th

The sound of glass being filled in a dark quiet room sounds so relaxing

The smell of a sweet and sour amalgam fills the surrounding area

The fan swirls above probably circulating the dust compiling on the top of each blade

The television sits askew, possibly an effect of the last glass that was filled

That was only five minutes ago, and ten minutes before that, a crisp orange, bitter ale filled the room with a pop of a bottle cap

Ten minutes past now the glass is impossible to keep track of, so the bottle it is

After I've forgotten the bottle I reach for another

A stronger mix and deeper scent than the last

That was only thirty minutes ago, and by now the sweet and sour of whiskey displeases my nasal passages

The only solution is to mix soda, then it's easier to knock back in high amounts

I let my hand tip and pour slow

I knock the drink back quick and eventually slip into a state of being comatose

I wake up, I'm breathing, I'm seeing, I failed again, what the hell is he thinking

[kr36]

One Last Poem

I was young in love and scared

So I packed up and went away

The feelings I had for you were more than love

You were out of state, young and completely unaware

So you watched me leave as if I just didn’t care

And I handle it with little regard to how it affected you

I waded around you, not realizing the confusion and pain you had to bear

All I knew was the hole missing from when I had you there

I turned away and led on experiences, knowing you weren’t out of reach, but I trekked on pretending my life was something we couldn’t share

I paused all interaction all the while your life was just beginning to fill with action

I sat by watched time pass and knew at some point you outgrew the idea of me in your life

I spent my time feeling love and falling in it, falling out and learning myself along with it

I spent the months figuring it all out, and it pointed back to you

Naturally I allowed my emotions to run freely, you sent back speechless and feeling a bit frazzled by this discovery

We began a journey on what started as potentially, and that transitioned to eventually, which quickly ended, and you called that inevitability

I called it blasphemy, but sadly a letter works two ways, and recently you haven’t written me

So lately I’ve been silently sitting and contemplating what words I could muster

Yet again it’s a blunder, a wonderland of darkness

If you’re reading this, then thank you for the experiences, the journeys been great, I hope you can look back and relate