just playing video games.

ryu jitae. 19. outsiders; 2nd in command. "am i broken? what's the chance i will survive? don't sugarcoat me, 'cause i feel like suicide. just give it to me straight cause i'm running out of time. i need an antidote, now what can you prescribe? it's like an avalanche, i feel myself go under. and the weight of it's like hands around my neck. i never stood a chance. my heart is frozen over, and i fee like i am treading on thin ice. and i'm going under-- i need a cure for me, 'cause a square doesn't fit the circle."

[ksjitae]

ksxhoetaek:

“you know what, that’s a really good point,” hoetaek chuckles, lightly, appreciating the boy’s continued interest in this conversation. “hey plants, keep your secrets to yourself, for the good of the universe,” they tell the sunflowers next to them. their smile turns a little sad when the boy mentions the plants being lonely though, and they let their eyes wonder over the greenhouse again. “yeah, being lonely sucks. I think if I was a flower or something I’d rather be planted in a greenhouse with all of my friends, instead of like, by myself on some person’s windowsill,” they shrug a little, their hand absentmindedly sliding into their jacket pocket to play with the lighter there. 

they wait, curious but patient, as the boy repeats their name, before introducing himself. jitae, hoetaek makes a mental note of the name, filing it away in their memory somewhere they hopefully wont forget it. “ah, so your guardian’s a staff member, that makes sense,” they nod a little. they don’t really get what jitae means by “not really my dad” but hoetaek also doesn’t think it’s their place to ask. so they don’t, letting jitae’s explanation stay as it is. “that’s good the high school opened then, so you can stay close by to him and stuff. you know all the college kids keep complaining about it, but the more people I talk to the more it seems the high school’s actually benefited more people that it’s inconvenienced.”  

hoetaek catches the hit of a smile on jitae’s face, and their own warm one returns, hoping jitae can relax enough to show more of it. “it’s nice to meet you too, jitae. and no… well, yes,” they scratch their cheek a little awkwardly. “I do like plants, aesthetically speaking, and I mean, I guess I also like the ones you can smoke… but I’m not really into plants, you know? like I’m not very versed in the whole gardening thing. my friend jisoo is though, he’s in the gardening club. I was actually looking for him, that’s why I’m here, but I think I just forgot he has class right now…” hoetaek trails off, suddenly realising they’re talking a lot. “ah.. sorry, I’m not usually that talkative, I just kind of haven’t… really talked to anyone all day.” class doesn’t really count as proper human interaction to hoetaek, not in the ones they had all day today anyway, which really, when they think about it, is probably part of what led them down here looking for jisoo in the first place.

jitae’s smiling a little more again when the other speaks to the plants, a little amused but also still nervous, which probably shows as he fiddles with his fingers again. “we’re not worthy enough for the secrets.” he hummed out quietly, looking at the plants around him for a moment once more, before turning back to them. “do you think they’re kind to each other? when they’re all in here together. do you think they’re nice?” he runs his fingers over the petals then of a tulip next to him, tilting his head out of his own kind of curiosity.

jitae nodded in confirmation at their repeated words, making sure at least that he himself had managed to get that fact about himself out. it kind of cleared things up most of the time anyway, as to why he’d been around before, that was. “mhm, s-so it’s why i could um, it’s why i could be around the school. i didn’t.. don’t-- i don’t like being i-in the house alone.” his words were stumbled and mumbled then as he tried to get his pronunciation right, still struggling with certain words. it made him too conscious of it really. “uh huh, and i-it lets me be around p-people that are my um, my age, i-i guess. i’m not used to that.” he nodded. “i mean, when y-you’re not used to having h-high school kids around.. maybe it is a little bit of an i-in.. inconvenience--”

his smile is a little wider now, understanding at least that hoetaek isn’t here to hurt him or scare him, and if they were then it definitely wasn’t coming across that way. so he smiled in return to them then, though his head tilted a little as hoetaek spoke about plants, his features screwing up a little in confusion. “smoke?” maybe he was dumb for not getting that, but it wasn’t something that jitae had heard before.. maybe minsu or lux knew about it-- but the mention of jisoo had him perking up again. “he’ll probably be here later, we have the club later.” he nodded a little, “but i-i’m the only one that really uh, that comes at this time.” he shrugged slightly. “a-ah it.. it’s okay. i h-haven’t really either? i don’t talk to many people.. most of the time.” it was minsu and lux that usually did that anyway.

[ksjitae]

ksdaewon:

Although the food at keisung’s cafeteria was not the best, Daewon found himself there when he was too busy or too tired to go to the bbq place he worked at.  At least they were nice enough to let him eat there at a reduced price that he could afford but today he was in no mood to go out of campus.  He had been in keisung long enough to know which dishes were better though and that was what he had chosen for lunch.  He wondered where his two best friends were as he ate but of course, before he could think too much about it, someone was calling his name.  A wide smile appeared on the misfit’s face when he realized who it was and at the question, he could only laugh.

Maybe it was because he had met the other for a while or the fact that the other two alters didn’t talk to him as freely as Lux but Daewon was able to figure out that the one in front of him was Lux.  He couldn’t say that he wasn’t surprised when he heard about the situation but he tried to think of it as three people in one body.  You never knew who you were getting unless you talked to them but at least for what he had seen all of them were nice people.  “Of course I did but not let that make your ego bigger than it already is.” He joked as he moved his hand to ruffle Lux’s hair before he noticed that the other was only carrying a cup.  “Aren’t you going to eat anything?”

daewon was definitely one of the closer people to him. one of the ones that tolerated him and if anything, brought out the better side him too-- which was rare in some cases, but he just liked the others company too. he liked that he got on with jitae and minsu as well, that he was one of the few that actually wanted to know them all and talk to them all, rather than look at each of them ( or one of them? technically? ) like they were insane. there was just a comfort and friendliness in daewon that lux didn’t find in many people, and it was why seeing him in the cafeteria made him perk up a lot. 

“you know that anything you tell me is going to make my ego even bigger, you’re just helping.“ he grinned, laughing as daewon ruffled his hair too. he’d always been a fan of affection, in any way that it was shown, so that action alone had him feeling happy really. though a second after, lux was back to fixing his hair back into place. “nah,“ he scrunched up his nose a little, “not a fan of the cafeteria food, and i got something from the cafe earlier to make up for not eating here.“

[ksjitae]

ksminghao:

minghao knew going to the masquerade had been a mistake. he hadn’t even been planning on going, but somehow, jungeun had managed to convince him otherwise. and now here he was, on the verge of crying as he was making his way through the crowd towards the bathroom. he desperately needed to get away, be by himself for a moment. relief flooded through him when he finally saw the door to the bathroom. he quickly made his way inside, forgetting to check if there was anyone else there before he sank down to the floor, letting the tears flow freely. a moment later, he heard someone clear their throat, his head instantly shooting up to see who was in there with him. “oh, i’m… i’m sorry,” he mumbled, wiping the tears from his face.

lux was enjoying himself. sure, he was a little tipsy by now, but he could handle his liquor just fine, and being tipsy just made him feel a whole lot better about being here, it was fun, even if he needed to go back and find daewon at some point soon. though he’d wanted to leave him with tristan and hyuksoo for a while too, knowing that he’d probably think that he couldn’t go and see them anymore. still, walking into the bathroom now, lux hadn’t expected to mee a teary eyed face, and it made the usually teasing and flirty boy concerned.. which might’ve been minsu’s protective instinct slamming into him as well. which wasn’t new, and lux knew that minsu was hovering around in the background in case. “why would you be sorry?” he frowned, moving over and leaning down in front of him as he putted the mask off his own face. “are you alright? do you need me to get anyone, or call someone? someone to talk to-- given i’m not the best for that, but are you alright? you’re not hurt?” yes, apparently minsu’s caring and protective side was rubbing off onto him right now.

[ksjitae]

ksxsangmin:

sangmin went to the cafe whenever he felt the need to write. one of sangmin’s guilty pleasures was his love for poetry. his grandmother used to buy whole books of poems and, even after she passed, he continued to read them. he eventually tried his hand at writing and, even though he had no way of telling if he was any good, he enjoyed having another way of expressing himself that didn’t include his fists. if anyone asked, though, he’d deny it until he was blue in the face. usually when he showed up to the cafe there were a few students lingering, but it was normally college students who didn’t recognize him. today, though, there was a familiar face. granted, the face was sleeping, but still familiar. jitae. the outsider’s second in command. sangmin knew of the boy of course, but he’d never had a conversation with him. he was… pretty?

sangmin grabbed a black coffee and shuffled over next to the boy. is he dead?, he thought to himself, but then the other is moving and sangmin is stumbling backwards. “sorry if i woke you. i— you just… looked like you weren’t breathing,” he explained.

when he lifted his head, the last thing that jitae was really expecting was for someone to actually be nearly right next to him, making the youngers eyes widen ever so slightly, almost looking panicked even for a few moments but that was more from the sudden awakening and now interaction-- but as he rubbed at his eyes, tried to stifle a yawn into his free hand as well, jitae tried to figure out if he actually knew the other.. and right now no name was coming to the face, but then again, jitae had a hard time remembering most people unless they were close enough sometimes. 

“i-- um.. you--” the words were stuttered out awkwardly, continuously broken off by the next word that came out as jitae tried to get his bearings. tried to actually make his head work even just a little bit so he could reply. “i-it’s okay.. but i-- well.. i-i am breathing?”

[ksjitae]

ksxhoetaek:

hoetaek worries, for a moment, that they have managed to scare the boy, despite their best efforts. but he seems to recover, at least enough for hoetaek not to think they should start backing out, and they can’t help the smile that lifts their cheeks at the kid’s answer to their question. hoetaek imagines that probably 99% of other people would’ve responded to them with a weird look or a “plants can’t talk”, but this kid had actually… taken their question seriously, and what’s more, given an actual genuine thoughtful answer.

“hmm, you’re probably right. plants probably hold the secrets to the universe and we’ll never know because we’re only human and we can never hope to understand.” hoetaek glances around the greenhouse, taking it in more as a whole rather than plant by plant as they had been before. it’s kind of magical in here, like a whole other world. they can see why jisoo spends so much of his time in here. “it is a shame they’ll never leave the greenhouse, but I suppose it’s nice that at least they all have so many friends.”

hoetaek leans sideways against the bench they’re standing next to, turning their eyes back to the boy, trying to keep their expression soft as they look at him, still weary about scaring him. “I’m hoetaek. not hyung, or noona, just hoetaek,” they introduce themself, pointing a finger at their chest. “you’re uh, not.. new here?” that’s probably not the best way to explain what they mean, they try again. “I just mean that.. I saw you around before, you know, like before they added the high school. not that I’m asking why, it’s was just easier to notice you before when you were the youngest face around.” they’re babbling, which probably isn’t the smartest idea, especially since they’re starting to think they might’ve just dug themselves into a hole. “hi, is really all I meant.”

jitae was easily scared, it was just something about him now that sudden voices, encounters, and people that just appeared seemingly out of nowhere, would make the kid jump. he was just.. startled quickly-- like a cat, only a lot more skittish and timid than a cat because he didn’t have claws and he’d rather run than think about standing up for himself. but it was just why jitae couldn’t help the flinch and startling when the new figure appeared and knocked his mind out of his peaceful zone in the greenhouse. but he was surprised in himself that he’d managed to even stutter out an answer really too.

“i think... i-if humans found out the.. t-the universes secrets-- then it would be d-dangerous. maybe that’s why we’ll never know.“ it was funny, because as odd as this conversation really was, strange even, they were the kinds that made jitae feel a lot more at ease than some of the others that people through out to talk about. it made him feel calmer. “t-true.. at least they aren’t alone. it wouldn’t be nice to be lonely.“

jitae’s eyes are still wide and he looks up and over at the other too, face a picture of worried innocence really as he lets his fingers run over the leaves of one of the plants-- until he hears the introduction, and it makes him look over once more, nodding slightly as they talk. “h-hoetaek-- hoetaek..” he let the name roll on his tongue for a moment, lips mouth the name to get used to it, before nodding slightly at the question. “a-as a student.. i’m new. i’m jitae-- third year high schooler but my dad.. he-- he’s not r-really my dad but-- well, he works here.. so i come over with him.” jitae’s brows furrow though, unhappy with his description and how he was using words, not feeling like he was speaking properly honestly, but he couldn’t really take it back now. but he does smile a little, soft and more like a hint of a smile at their last words. “hi.. i-it’s nice to meet you. do you.. d-do you like plants too?”

[ksjitae]

jisooxks:

“you’re… not jitae?” he can only blink and look at the other boy with a confused tilt to his head. “oh, i’m sorry for assuming you’re jitae then.” the accent throws him for a moment; for the many times he’s spoken to the soft spoken jitae before, jisoo thinks he would’ve noticed the Gyeongsangdo dialect the other was currently speaking with. what is going on here? “i think you might need to explain it then… minsu. i don’t really… understand…” the look he gives… minsu is curious with underlying glimmers of caution that tighten the seams of his shoulders and pulls his body closer into itself; he knows jitae, is familiar with jitae and his timid nature. but the boy before him is unfamiliar, and jisoo knows by now that unfamiliar people are more than capable of hurting him, even if they don’t mean to.

“it’s… not so much astrology, more.. astronomy. astrology is studying the stars to… try and predict the future, of sorts. astronomy is just… looking at them.” his words are chosen carefully and they ring filtered and non-threatening in his ears. he knows he’s being skittish, but he’s been taken off guard and now he needs to build his walls back up. he can’t help the slight perk of his head when minsu mentions the comet again; he’s still on edge but it wouldn’t hurt to indulge the other boy, just for this… right?

“yeah, there’s supposed to be one tonight, in an hour or so.” his shoulders relax minutely, but the grip on his eyepiece is still tight, hands white with pressure and the silver in his veins whispering caution, be careful, you don’t know him into his fingertips. jisoo regards the other boy and bites his lip, forcing a tiny step forward towards minsu. “i don’t mind if—i mean, you can have a look… if you’d like?” the small smile he gives the boy feels like a peace offering and the gossamer strings holding up his body loosen, only slightly. “oh, and i don’t mind, you know. if you smoke.”

minsu sighs a little, realising that he probably sounds a little too much like a mad man right now, like someone that isn’t entirely sane probably and it makes him feel tense.  but still, he shakes his head. he must only know jitae after all, which makes him appear a lot.. less friendly? he doesn’t even mean that, it’s just that minsu isn’t the most open of people.  “not your fault, wouldn’t be the only one that isn’t aware of his.. situation-- i guess you can call it that.” he shrugged a little, sighing once more. “jitae.. has been through a lot in his past. a lot of people have used him and hurt him, and because of that and everything he went through up until he developed dissociative personality disorder. might know it better as multiple personalities.” he sounded a lot more professional than usual then, not really meaning it but it was how he always sounded explaining it. 

“i’m minsu, i developed when he was thirteen, and you can consider me his oldest brother. i protect him, stop anyone from hurting him again and take over when he feels intimidated or he’s too tired.” for now, he could leave his own description at that, there wasn’t much more to be said after all, but he nodded more in confirmation to himself. “lux is another alter, and he developed when he was fifteen. he’s the second oldest, just as protective as me but he’s scared of confrontation as well. you can consider him the.. sexual one-- just don’t say it. he was developed for that, but for the past two years we’ve been trying to get him to stop thinking about it in that way. either way, you’ll know if you meet him straight away normally.” it was just rarer to encounter lux. “so, as fucked up as it sounds, jitae got messed up when he was younger and i’m one of the products of that, but so long as i can look after him then i don’t really care. even if it’s fucked up.”

but with an explanation out of the way, his thoughts went more to what the other had said regarding astronomy and astrology-- “sorry, as we can see, i’m not entirely well versed on either of those things. still sounds interesting though.” even if it wasn’t one of his hobbies, and probably never would be, it was still something he could be interested in. but minsu can see that the other isn’t comfortable, can tell the signs and if he’d seen jitae physically, he’d probably think they were similar in some ways. but he couldn’t. “are you sure i wouldn’t be imposing on you?” he didn’t want to cause the other anymore discomfort after all. but he smiled a little again at being told he could smoke, it prompting him to pull the packet from his pocket as well as the lighter before slipping a cigarette between his fingers and up to his lips as he lit it up. thankful for the smoke in his lungs then.

[ksjitae]

ksmalee:

the library was unquestionably the brainiacs’ territory, but by far, it had to be the least exclusive places for a clique’s supposed headquarters. not that malee minded, really – she rather liked seeing members of other cliques frequent the place, searching for their own peace of mind with the company of the mostly outdated yet still useful books keisung had to offer. what she wasn’t fond of was anyone trying to walk in and start some chaos, which was apparently what some kid tried to do between the shelves. a troublemaker, she assumed, was trying to scare another high schooler out of their wits. malee walked over to shoo them off, immediately detecting something amiss when she laid her eyes on the spooked kid. jitae, she thought his name was, having heard of him before through whispers in the hallways about him and his multiple personalities. quietly, malee started guiding him to a quieter corner in the library. “hey, are you okay? do you need me to help you with anything?” she recalled the few steps she’d read about handling someone who was dissociating before, when she’d looked up his condition upon first hearing about it. “i think you’re… dissociating, but nothing bad is happening to you,” she reassured him, in her most gentle tone of voice, “we’re in the library, and you just got a little startled, is all.”

he doesn’t hear her talk-- her questions of what she’s trying to get an answer to. it goes in one ear and out the other as his mind fizzles in and our, eyes unfocused and hazy; mind clouded now as he slowly slips into consciousness. he still feels like he’s miles away from his body though. his fingers don’t move when he tries to grasp air-- and is feet only move when she pulls him away, and even then he still didn’t particularly feel the actual movement of it either. it’s only when he really starts coming to, the undeniable pounding in his head, that his eyes screw shut. pain spreading across his expression as his breathing picks up for a few moments, laboured until he gets a hold of himself and registers that yes, there was someone talk to him. there was someone near him. but he still felt lost, and it was a more rare occasion for him to feel this messed up after dissociation too. sure, he’d always feel confused and like he wasn’t in the right place of body, but he felt all over the place this time-- “what time--” he breathed out again though, holding a hand to his head, eyes still shut then as he covered his face with that hand instead. almost jumping at his voice-- he was too tired for this. both body and mind apparently. “where am-- what.. time. what time is it-- day? time.”

[ksjitae]

ksxara:

“oh good. i thought you were lux there for a moment. i don’t have time to deal with his sex stories today,” she said as she breathed out a sigh in relief. she went straight to her coffee maker to get the caffeine going, setting out her own mug and asked, “coffee? or tea?” she set out the timer either way and sat down on her chair, finally facing the young high schooler. “the couch is free. i’m talking to minsu, yes?” she wasn’t exactly sure who she was talking to because if she went by the clothes, it’d be jitae. but then his hair spoke of lux. yet the way he answered—the accent was a dead giveaway—reminded him of minsu and if she guessed correctly, she was talking to the eldest right now. at the sound of her timer going off, she stood up and poured the hot beverage in her mug, before getting another smaller cup and pouring the high schooler’s preferred beverage and passing it on to him. “so who was out before you got pulled? you look dead on your feet so i’m just going to assume you weren’t the one out there before this.”

minsu frowned for a moment, before his eyes rolled at her words. “you know he can’t help it, and you can tell him to stop and he will.” minsu might’ve thought of lux as a brat, spoiled and irritating and forever trying to get on his last nerve whenever possible-- until jitae came into the picture and then he was a goddamn angel. not that minsu could really say anything to that. but still, he was his older brother, and however irritating the brat was, he was still defensive over him, knowing that he was the way he was for a reason after all. “coffee.” he sighed, moving over to the couch then and laying down, propping his head against the arm so he could try and ease the headache forming-- “minsu, yea.” it would probably be just him until tomorrow anyway, so all he could hope was that he could get some kind of decent sleep hopefully at least. or that today was just uneventful from now. minsu did sit up a little when the cup was passed to him though, thanking her quietly before answering her question. “lux, probably. i think anyway-- jitae was around this morning, but he’s tired so he’s asleep. and lux took off as soon as some kind of confrontation happened. dead on my feet. shattered. i was sleeping before this happened, and because all three of us have been around today my head feels like it’s getting pounded by a hammer.” he grumbled, free arm dropping over his eyes to hide the light for a moment. “what time is it?”

[ksjitae]

jisooxks:

@ksjitae

there’s nowhere quite like the roof of the dorms at night; it was the closest jisoo could get to touching the stars, to being able to be free of all the earthly burdens he carried with him a second skin. he loves looking up through his telescope, mapping out the stars and finding the connections between the constellations. the cosmos whispers and points out the same constellation of burns and scars mapped down his back, featherlight traces making him shiver and grip at the telescope’s focuser tighter. the universe sat together with silence, arm in arm as they watch jisoo carefully set up his telescope near the edge of the rooftop; there’s supposed to be a comet orbiting close enough to the earth to be seen by the naked eye, but jisoo wants a closer look. silence is deafening, and perhaps that’s why he doesn’t notice earthly presence and the unfamiliar aura behind him until he turns back around to fix the optical tube.

“oh. jitae,” he blinks at the newcomer, a small welcoming smile forming on his lips. he knows jitae from the gardening club and is rather fond of the highschooler; he pretends he doesn’t see the same look the younger’s eyes as his, he pretends jitae doesn’t walk around with cautious steps like he’s being chased by ghosts of the past either. “i didn’t hear you. i didn’t know you were into astronomy either,” he feels a flutter of excitement at the possibility of being able to share his passion for space with another person, especially someone he’s already familiar with. “are you up here to see the comet too? here,” he gestures to the boy to come closer, “you can look in my telescope if you’d like; you’ll get a better view that way.”

minsu was the one that frequented the roofs-- lux too, give or take the timing considering he was usually more likely to be out during the day unless minsu was tired enough to let him roam free. but it wasn’t often that he actually saw anyone else there, and it was why he found it pretty much the perfect spot to sit and smoke alone, whilst watching people come and go below him. link ants wandering aimlessly until they found their destination. he was up there during the day too, when it was quiet enough that even with the few others loitering, he could still have some peace of quiet and mind-- only today was different, and minsu walked out and heard a familiar name being called, by an unfamiliar figure. 

see, there were a lot of difficulties when it came to their disorder, and this was one of them in the fact that well.. some people only knew one of them, probably didn’t even know there were others. and that made things a difficulties now as the normally blank and grumpy looking male just listened for a moment. if he was friends with jitae-- then he couldn’t really be much bother, right? “i’m not actually jitae,” his thick busan dialect could probably give that away in a heartbeat if the way he moved and the clothes he wore already didn’t. “i’m one of the other two, if you know what i’m talking about. if you don’t, my name’s minsu and i’ll explain, i guess.” minsu shrugged lightly, moving forward a little after a moment, but keeping a distance. “astrology isn’t my thing either, it’s more lux’s. i can appreciate it for what it is, but i couldn’t tell you much about the stars or anything-- i just came up here to smoke, if you don’t mind? i won’t bother you if you don’t want me to either-- there’s a comet tonight?” his head tilts then, almost forgetting what he’d been saying before-- a piece of himself then wondering if that was more lux’s thought than his own actually. but.. his curiosity was peeked.

[ksjitae]

[ksjitae]

are you excited about the masquerade ball?

“yup. minsu and jitae don’t really care, but i’m excited.“

[ksjitae]

so when you have a mental break down is it just you or all three of you?

“it’s.. just me– we’re not connected in that way. minsu usually takes it in though, he holds it in when he takes over– but sometimes it gets too much for him and even he breaks down..“

[ksjitae]

[ksjitae]

at this point, there really probably should’ve been a special place in the cafe reserved just for jitae for the amount of time he actually spent in there over anywhere else. it was among his top places to spend time in, usually reading, but on the odd occasion; sleeping. like he was today. sometimes, switching between lux and minsu, others taking over his head and body for different lengths of time, it took it out of him both mentally and physically. and with everything going on right now. it tired him out and after some time spent in the cafe that morning reading, jitae had nodded off a little while ago, coffee still half full on the table next to where his head had fallen to rest against the book he’d been reading. but it was long cold by now. still, he wasn’t so sure how long jitae’d let himself drift off for before some movement nearby was waking up the sleepy kid.

[ksjitae]

ksxhoetaek:

@ksjitae

for hoetaek, sadness and loneliness go hand in hand. they’re an old couple, tethered together with strings of memories hoetaek would rather forget. whenever one crawls it’s way into hoetaek’s heart, the other’s not far behind. sometimes, if they’re lucky, loneliness visits first, and they can seek out a friend’s company before sadness’s familiar ache settles too harshly in their chest. it’s loneliness that brings hoetaek to the greenhouses today, in search of one of their closest friends. 

in hindsight, hoetaek should’ve messaged jisoo first to find out if he was free. hoetaek was sure jisoo didn’t have class at this time, and he hadn’t been hanging out under the bleachers, or in his room, so hoetaek had assumed they’d be able to find him here. but then again they’re bad enough at keeping track of their own schedule, their friends’ are a lost cause. jisoo’s not here, in fact the greenhouses are seemingly empty, nothing but plants to keep them company, though hoetaek figure’s that’ll have to do for now. 

they wander through the rows of plants, looking through them and trying to remember which ones are jisoo’s so they can at least report back on their status, and a quiet five minutes pass before hoetaek realises they’re not alone. there’s a boy here, tucked away towards the back. a high schooler, but not like most of the high schoolers hoetaek generally ignores, they know this one. they don’t know his name, but back before keisung had decided to add a high school, hoetaek had seen this kid hanging around, enough times for his face to stick somewhere in hoetaek’s memory. 

they’re not entirely sure what it is that makes them decide to talk to this kid, but hoetaek puts it down to the fact that they’re starting to crave company the way they crave cigarettes. so they approach him, keeping enough distance to (hopefully) not potentially frighten the boy, but coming up close enough for him to hear them when they speak softly. “what do you think the plants talk about?” hoetaek asks, brushing their fingers over the petals of the sunflower next to them. “they whisper to each other, don’t you think? through the wind. I bet they love telling stories.”

now if there was one place that jitae spent a good amoutn of his time at, it would be the greenhouse. he was a part of the gardening club for a reason after all, and for some reason unknown to him, the plants and flowers made him feel at ease. calm inside. they also reminded him of the beauty of nature too, and it was fascinating to him how planting something so small in the ground could then blossom into.. well flowers, and trees and vegetables and all kinds of things. it amazed him to no end, and it made him feel safe-- it was another reason as to why he probably had too many plants at home that he looked after himself too.

and today was another day of spending some of his free time tending to everything there as he always did. soft smile on his features because at least here it was quiet and there was no one to scare him. it was quiet in his head for once too, which was actually a nice thing for jitae because as much as he knew that minsu would still come around at a moments notice, it was nice to know that the other two were getting some rest right now. even if it was weird were he to mention that to anyone else.. they didn’t understand it like he did after all.

jitae jumps at the sound of a voice though, however soft it if, he just didn’t expect to not hear anyone approaching first. or it to be an unfamiliar voice either. jitae just wasn’t used to company in here was it not one of the other members, so it made him look up, eyes wide and maybe a little panicked for a moment, but not entirely when he actually registered what they’d said. “i-i.. i--” his voice stuttered in his throat for a moment then-- “i’m not.. s-sure?” which didn’t seem like a helpful answer.. but jitae’d never though about it. “maybe.. about things we’d never understand-- their s-stories probably travel around.. but it’s sad they wouldn’t go anywhere out of t-the greenhouse.”

[ksjitae]

ksjian:

@ksjitae

Right now the only thing Jian wanted to do was to strangle someone, a specific someone that didn’t seem to get that he had no intention of doing him another favor and had been waiting for him at his office after a meeting he had with the principal.  He knew that the staff member had seen him turn around and leave but he didn’t know if he was being followed.  Thankfully, he knew the school better than most and if the staff member was following him, then by the time he found himself in the music rooms, he was sure he had lost them.  Still, there was no way he was going back to his office where he knew the other would be waiting for him and slipping into one of the music rooms, he closed the door behind him before he realized that the room was not empty.

“Oh, I, um, I thought it was empty.” He told the student that was already inside and the thought of leaving passed through his mind as he spoke.  It was obvious that he was interrupting the other and it wasn’t like he wanted to stay there when there was someone he didn’t know.  Of course, as he took a better look at the student, he realized that it was Ryu Jitae or one of his alters, he wasn’t sure.  Before he could open his mouth to greet him or acknowledge that he knew who the other was, there was a knock on the door and the guidance counselor ran his hand through his hair because if that was the staff member he was going to strangle them.  “If it’s a staff member, I am not here.” He whispered to the other as he looked for a place to hide and really, this was so not how he expected his day to go.

for once, minsu had actually been around all day, which probably spoke for itself given the all black outfit and grumpy looking expression which was kind of just natural for him now. but given that jitae was too tired and lux had gone god knows where, minsu was at least able to settle down without a pounding headache from their dissociations. and now he’d been in the music room for a good few hours really, fingers plucking at guitar strings because if there was something that they all had in common, it was music. jitae liked the piano, lux liked to sing, and minsu liked guitar and singing together. though give or take that they all actually liked singing, jitae was just on the shyer end and usually kept it to himself. lux and minsu knew though.

what minsu wasn’t expecting though was for the door to open, and not a student enter but a staff-- particular staff; jian. who entered looking a lot like he was trying to disappear maybe, which was odd, but minsu just watched for a moment with interest before shrugging him off. “s’fine.” because it wasn’t like he was to bothered honestly, though when there was a knock on the door, minsu’s head tilted as the older male turned to him. “fine, whatever. but i thought it was the students that were supposed to hide from staff.” he hummed dullely for a moment before getting up and answering the door. sure enough, there was staff member, and after a few comments that he was the only one here, and no, no one had passed by, the staff reluctantly turned and left, and minsu stayed put a moment to make sure he was gone anyway before closing the door. “they’re gone.”

[ksjitae]

tutoring was new to jitae, mostly because of the fact that he was so used to being tutored by the man he called his father instead now because he at least offered him help when he needed it most. but upon joining and enrolling in the high school, it had been advised that a tutor was set up for him from the college due to his.. well, a little severe lack of prior education as well as the situation he was in which made it a little more difficult to keep up with school work. but at least it did give him the very valid excuse to get extra time of assignments and such when he needed it, even if some professors weren’t too fond of that. but at least for the most part, they were.

still, today was his first session with his tutor, and jitae wasn’t actually sure what to expect as he sat in the room reserved for session like this, hands playing with the sleeves of the oversized jumped he was wearing now and picking at the threads of. jitae was obviously nervous anyway, and a little early-- but he wanted to be. it just scary for him meeting strangers sometimes, especially when you’re worried about being judged for a great amount of things when the session actually starts. but he had hopes that this would go well-- or at least as good as it possibly could. and when the door opened, jitae’s eyes diverted over to see who his tutor actually would be. @ksxzychul