Shadesong/Sam | 30 | they/he
icon by ygoicons
No matter the world, no matter how far, you're still always the same. Everything you touch makes you stronger. It always has.
Hello! I'm Shadesong, and you're viewing my personal blog.
I’m currently 30, and I’m your local transmasc panromnatic asexual. I prefer they/he pronouns on the internet.
My current biggest interests include: Kingdom Hearts, Yugioh anime (DM - Go Rush), In Stars and Time, Deltarune, Persona 3 & 5, Umamusume, Sonic the Hedgehog, and Megaman Battle Network.
I'm very shy, I'm employed full time, I have frequent migraines, and I've been moving out of the house that I grew up in since July 2025. These factors can make me really fatigued and quiet, and I have a difficult time initiating conversation. Feel free to initiate conversation with me first, or you can ask for my discord if we're mutuals!
This blog partially runs on a queue that posts while i’m asleep. My queue tag is currently “sworn my allegiance to magic queue”. I try to keep about 300 posts in the queue at all times, so, posts that you see coming out of the queue now I probably put in there months ago.
Other important tags:
Personal text posts: #song of the shade
Fics I wrote tag: #shade writes
Art (Doodles): #doodlesong
Notable fics:
you and me makes one (In Stars and Time)
War to Zen: Maniac You Die (Yugioh Sevens/Go Rush)
Cynet Backdoor (Yugioh Vrains/Sevens)
Fusion Tag (Yugioh GX/Arc V)
Karma Dimension (Yugioh Go Rush)
Return from the Different Dimension (Yugioh GX/5Ds)
Dimension Gate (Yugioh Vrains/Zexal)
Revenge Return (Yugioh 5Ds/Vrains)
Re:Build (Kingdom Hearts Re:Coded)
Through Whatever You Lose, You Will Always Have Me (Yugioh Vrains)
No Chance in Hell (Undertale)
Manjoume Thunder(struck) (Yugioh GX)
Righteous Justice (Yugioh Arc V/GX)
I am a plural system! You can see who is currently fronting here. My system consists of about 25 headmates (not including our 10 known fragments and 3 known soulbonds), all of whom are fictives. A rundown of our headmates can be found below:
Siffrin: Host - he/they - Source: In Stars and Time
Supernova: Host/Designated Driver - they/them - Source: In Stars and Time (Loop)
I hate my stupid body that doesn't work properly and i hate my stupid self that can't properly maintain it without falling apart. I would like to stop wishing I was dead now
Self-Care - activities required for personal care, such as eating, dressing, or grooming, that can be managed by an individual without the assistance of others.
The Self-Care Wheel
Provides a structure for identifying and nourishing areas where you are either failing, surviving, or thriving.
The most widely used assessment wheel, created by the Olga Phoenix Project, is based on the work of Karen Saakvitne and Laurie Pearlman (described in Transforming the Pain: A Workbook on Vicarious Traumatization; 1996).
The Olga Phoenix Self-Care Wheel consists of two sheets, each containing a set of 6 dimensions placed on the outside rim of the wheel, including:
Psychological
Emotional
Spiritual
Personal
Professional
Physical
Each dimension represents an area of your life that, ideally, deserves daily attention.
The first sheet contains a suggested list of topics, placed between the spokes of the wheel below the relevant dimension.
Each item is an inspiration or a prompt to take an action that promotes nurture in that area.
The second wheel is left blank for personalization.
A therapist or coach typically supplies both sheets to a client, but there may be times (to avoid bias) where only the blank sheet is given.
Self-Care Activities for your Physical Domain
Your physical health is vital to your overall wellbeing, And, according to the American Nurses Association, it is not only the absence of disease, but also lifestyle choices that avoid preventable illnesses, maintaining a balanced mind, body, and spirit.
Eat healthily
Exercise regularly
Be sexual (safely)
Put good sleeping habits in place
Take vacations
Take time off and ensure downtime
Schedule regular massages
Seek out a qualified acupuncturist
Take relaxing baths
Kiss (your partner, family, your dog)
Ask for nurture
Take daily walks (if possible in nature)
Turn off or put your phone on silent
Self-Care Activities for your Psychological Domain
Psychological wellbeing is crucial to not only your state of mind, but also your physical health. According to the American Psychological Association, psychological wellbeing involves being both happy and content, with low levels of distress, good mental health, and quality of life.
Perform self-reflection and self-awareness
Journaling
Sensory engagement
Schedule aromatherapy
Do something creative, draw, paint, quilt, cook, etc.
Go to the ballet, a symphony, or a concert
Relax in your garden, park, or at the beach
Garden
Read a self-help book
Think about your positive qualities and your strengths
Practice (and visualize) asking for and receiving help
Practice mindfulness
Self-Care Activities for your Emotional Domain
Emotional wellness can be described as understanding and being aware and comfortable with your feelings, and being able to express emotions constructively.
Perform affirmations
Cry
Social justice engagement
Laugh
Say “I love you” (show positive emotions more often, and mean them)
Watch a funny or heartening movie
Find a hobby
Flirt (if appropriate)
Buy yourself a present
Spend time with your pet
Practice forgiveness
Self-Care Activities for your Spiritual Domain
Spiritual wellness has a different meaning for each of us. Typically, it is about having values and beliefs that provide meaning to your life and having the opportunity and motivation to align your behavior to them.
Perform self-reflection
Spend time in nature
Self-cherish
Meditate or practice mindfulness
Sing and dance
Play with your children
Be inspired
Practice yoga
Bathe in the sea, a river, a lake
Watch the sunset or sunrise
Pray
Find a spiritual mentor
Volunteer for a cause close to your heart
Foster self-forgiveness
Self-Care Activities for your Personal Domain
Being engaged intellectually and at a profoundly personal level in your actions, environment, and social group is likely to promote growth and wellbeing in your personal domain.
Learn who you are
Explore what you want out of life
Plan short- and long-term goals
Make a vision board
Foster friendships
Go on dates
Get a coffee or drink with a friend
Learn to relax
Write poetry, short stories, or a book
Spend time with loved ones
Cook
Learn to play an instrument
Self-Care Activities for your Professional Domain
Wellbeing in the professional domain is most likely when your work and studies leave you feeling fulfilled, while you continue to grow, learn, and make meaningful contributions.
The diversity of problems that different transgender people face kind of boggles the mind, tbh.
Gender and culture and expression of both of those things are so individual and the problems that come with them are also incredibly individual. And people like fight over what problems are worse.
At a certain point I feel like we’re arguing that our cage is worse than our neighbor’s cage because they get to have a potted plant in there or something. Friend, the potted plant has nothing to do with the cage that you’re stuck in.
Passing, non passing, transfem, transmasc, androgynous, binary, non binary, neogender, fully transitioned, never transition, partially transitioned, stealth, out and proud. So many different situations. So many different problems. We should all be pointing our death lasers at The Man instead of each other though I think. I think that would be a bit more efficient.
The Good Place really went off when they had Eleanor talk about her mother changing. Like, they really hit the nail on the head.
like THIS??
This is EXACTLY how it feels to see someone you love, someone who should've treated you so much better than they did, grow and change for the better. Like, part of you knows that they're better now and you shouldn't be mad, but part of you is like, "Then why didn't they do this before? Where was this change when I needed it? Was the reason why they were so awful...me?".
if your blog has a frequent amount of posts about bad behavior from certain kinds of trans men or how much we need to watch out for harm trans men could potentially cause or if you spend a bunch of your time grabbing examples of shitty or even just less-than-stellar things random trans guys say and parading them constantly as representatives of us as a whole
and never have anything nice or even just neutral to say about trans men
it kinda makes you look like. crazy bigoted. to be honest. like you've got a vendetta against trans men in particular
It's not wrong to point out blind spots you may notice in trans mens behavior where they may be doing harm. It's not wrong to think an opinion that originated from a trans guy could be stupid or bad. But a dedication to constant cherry picking of negative trans guy posts is frankly, weird.
Trans guys are just another type of person.
I'm not really good with words, just be conscious of the image you're projecting with what you choose to talk about and what you DON'T choose to talk about re: trans guys.
was talking to a diabetic friend the other day and i told him that i don't think i'd consider my moderate chronic pain 'disabling', just because i have a high pain tolerance, so it rarely stops me from doing anything, it just causes a lot of pain while i do that thing
and he asks if i'd consider his diabetes a disability, because for him it doesn't usually mean he can't do anything, it just means he can't do stuff the same way non-diabetics can
i thought abt it for a second, then i said "yeah, because even if you can do the same stuff, it comes at a cost. and there's other stuff you've gotta do and keep track of"
"yeah. your chronic pain's the same way. you can do the same stuff, but the pain and rest later, that's the cost"
anyway i thought that was a good outlook on moderate chronic pain and impostor syndrome or whatever
