The Bowery Presents
PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH
Hole
let's talk about Bridgerton tea, my ask is open
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@kwtaehyun-blog
hey everyone! i finally have some time to post here. just a warning to everyone i have plots/threads with that i’ve put taehyun on hiatus! i have this super important test coming up mid november (bscly if i do well i have a good chance of getting into my dream program next year, with an amazing scholarship and all!) and i need to put all my free time into studying my ass off. pls guys root for me!! i hope i’ll be back soon! see you all!
@kwtaehyun - gym day
[ kkt > mr. nicebod ] yah where are you [ kkt > mr. nicebod ] take ur time cause [ kkt > mr. nicebod ] there’s this really cute dog keeping me company [ kkt > mr. nicebod ] [ image ] [ kkt > mr. nicebod ] the owner is so nice, he let me take a pic with the cute doggie
taehyun wakes up with his cellphone buzzing, a hangover just in the back of his eyelids. he rubs his eyes, picks up the cellphone, stares at the message. suddenly, he is wide awake.
[ txt - choi minho ] omw
he runs to the bathroom, wins the record for quickest shower ever before going back to his room and opening his closet. he doesn’t have a single piece of clothing that would be fit to work out in. he sighs, picks up a t-shirt, sneakers, and then run to seunghoon’s room and “borrows” one of his sweatpants. boy if dead on his sleep, he won’t mind, he is sure.
soon enough he is out, walking down the streets at a quick pace, now way too conscious of his empty stomach. he remembers jungkook once told him he shouldn’t do any kind of exercise without eating anything, but whatever. it’s too late now. he had forgotten all about the start of his working out sessions wit no other than choi minho. taehyun had reluctantly accepted the man’s offers for reasons that had very little to do with him wanting to be healthier, and a lot to do with minho being hot as fuck. taehyun is shallow, and he accepts that about himself wholeheartedly.
he arrives at the gym, looking for a tall man with a dog but only finds the tall man. “hey,” taehyun calls, walking towards him, “the dog left you already?”
he makes his way to where his study is, strides quick. “wha— dude, what are you even doing back there?” he laughs, and it’s a nervous sounding thing because honest to god, he’s almost afraid to witness the look of pure terror that would be kim taehyun’s expression. for a split second, he thinks lying would be the best option, but it’s in the next that he decides against it. “it is. but you don’t gotta worry too much about it, yeah? c’mon didn’t you want some beer?” he reaches for the knob, fully intent on casually sweeping it under the rug, neat and clean. “lets go get you some beer.”
dean is talking, that taehyun knows. he hears his voice somewhere far away, somewhere that probably is not drowning in chaos and destruction. he has lived with jinwoo for half of his life, and that was already traumatizing. but this. this level of mess is something he has never in his life seen. and taehyun has seen some fucked up shit.
“i’m not worried,” he says, voice getting slightly high pitched, so he tries to make it normal again. “not worried at all.” not much success.
without even thinking he enters the room, completely uninvited. he bites on his lower lip as he stares at the tv. turned on. there is no one watching. not a single soul watching the fucking tv why is it on? and then he looks somewhere else, at the desk. his heart does that thing when it twists and turns and he knows anxiety is coming. there are papers all over it. the pens they are all over but where they are supposed to be. there are two cups of coffee, one that taehyun is sure hasn’t been used in a while. he looks closer, almost gasps. one of the cups left a coffee stain on the desk.
unacceptable.
“uh,” he starts, fidgeting, “so,” picks up a pen, puts it in the pencil case, “this is. nice.”
150821 Arriving at GMP © NAMTAEHYUNDOTCOM | give credit.
✘
hugging them
[ kkt – kim tae ] okay… sorry [ kkt – kim tae ] i’m sure u’ll survive tho [ kkt – kim tae ] idk i thought u maybe like [ kkt – kim tae ] fled the country or something lol
( he pauses, fingertips stalling on the words. an olive branch shouldn’t feel so heavy. he could swear it’s even thorned. maybe it’s a reach to think that kim taehyun would ever need anything from him. he’s already imagining how he might misconstrue it as pity, and it’d be a lie to say that expecting it means he’s immune. but what the hell, once bitten—never shy. )
[ kkt – kim tae ] i know we’re not friends okay don’t overthink this lol but [ kkt – kim tae ] if you’re ever in trouble [ kkt – kim tae ] i’m still around
[ txt - jung jaeyoung ] lol [ txt - jung jaeyoung ] i had the will [ txt - jung jaeyoung ] but not the money
( he bites on his lower lip, restless, reading his cousin’s last texts again and again and again. he knows deep down it’s the effect of the high - the way he doesn’t close himself immediately, the way he even replies, heart beating fast in an odd almost hopeful way. in the last few months, taehyun had become no stranger to helping hands from people he never expected to do shit for him. and also way too used to knives on his back from people he’d have given his life for )
[ txt - jung jaeyoung ] ah [ txt - jung jaeyoung ] thanks [ txt - jung jaeyoung ] i guess
( as if )
☽
wandering alone at night
the air is chilly against his skin and taehyun allows himself to stay in front of the closed restaurant, cigarette between his fingers, recently dyed hair falling on his eyes. the blonde left its mark, his hair strands feel like nylon against his fingertips and it makes taehyun frown, annoyed. he used to have such a nice hair and now look at this mess. he shoves his free hand back into his jacket’s pocket, ready to start walking towards the station when he sees someone walking down the street and he stops.
taehyun stares for a while almost shamelessly so. jungkook has obviously not noticed him yet, but not that that matters much now, not when everything is out in the open. but after hiding for so long taehyun has made a habit out of it. he smokes, wonders what he is doing walking around this late at night all by himself. his heart aches inside his chest but just a little bit, this dull pain that taehyun grew used to by now. he once had a choice: either accepting being only his friend or not having him in any way - which, to be honest, wasn’t much of a choice at all.
the young man sighs, throws his cigarette on his feet and steps on it before picking it up and throwing it in the trash. it was just half done but taehyun never smokes around him now, some sort of olive branch. “hey,” he calls and when jungkook looks back at him, taehyun smiles open and bright. he’s happy to see him and he shows it. there’s nothing to hide. “wait up,” he shouts as he half runs towards him, “what are you doing here?”
“just walking,” jungkook replies, shrugging. taehyun shrugs along. “going home?”
“yup,” nods, “can i walk with you?”
“that’s a stupid question, tae.”
taehyun laughs, and they walk side by side.
☎ ⁇ ✿ ø @ ツ ♀ :^)
☎ for a rushed text
[ txt - teddy ] what do you mean you’re already there?[ txt - teddy ] fuck you man i didn’t even put my pants on yet[ txt - teddy ] wait ten min i’ll be right there
Send “✆” for a MORNING text. Send “✉” for a text that WASN’T SENT. Send “☎” for a RUSHED text. Send “⁇” for a DRUNK text. Send “✿” for a SUGGESTIVE text. Send “ø” for a LATE NIGHT text. Send “✘” for a HATEFUL text. Send “#” for a RANDOM text. Send “@” for a SCARED text. Send “&” for a LOVING text. Send “%” for a CURIOUS text. Send “ツ” for an EXCITED text. Send “$” for an ACCIDENTAL text. Send “♀” for a HEARTBREAKING text.
don’t be long
@kwtaehyun
“what are you doing here?” she smiles—tries to, pursing her lips to hide their trembling. softer, still, “taehyun.” and the more she tells herself not to weep, the more her throat swells, and her eyes burn. the memory of him floods her and she can’t help herself, her nose in runs and her loud crying. one hand attempts to wipe away the tears, and the other clings to the hem of taehyun’s shirt as though it might stop him from leaving again.
“i really, really— really missed you.”
night shifts have been getting harder and harder for him, walking around serving tables with aching feet and weak knees, blood that needed its vital dose of nicotine with way more frequency than the usual. taehyun keeps going, though, despite the sleepiness, despite his sore muscles. but he can’t help but glance towards the window from time to time, look at all the people his age walking around, laughing, having fun. something most people his age are doing on a friday night and yet here he is - picking up dirty plates, putting them in the dishwasher, coming back to more customers his age hungry for food and fun.
“smile, kid,” mrs. choi tells him when he gets back with the other, “you’ll scare them off.”
“how can you say that?” he asks, offended, “i’m being perfectly civil.”
“look, kid, if you were working on a funerary you’d be doing a good job, but here, in this restaurant, you’ll smile.”
so smile he does.
when a new customer comes in, a girl with long hair hiding her face, he already has his smile ready, note in hand, his welcoming speech at the tip of his tongue but then she looks at him and taehyun feels his heart drop to the bottom of his stomach. he stares back at the girl with confused eyes, and then she says his name and it’s like suddenly taehyun is 18 again. suddenly he is going to cram school, studying for the possibility of getting into a major he didn’t give a fuck about. suddenly he is sitting by the side of this girl who cracked through the massive wall he had created around himself, getting in so easily taehyun forgot how to fight back. nayeon had been a refuge back then, a sacred place where taehyun could relax, be himself. he never had anything to prove to her. not to her.
“nayeon,” he says, slightly desperate when he sees tears in her face, her hands reaching to his shirt as she says words that make his heart ache. he had been an asshole to her, just like to everyone else. but she was probably the one who less deserved it. “oh my god, no, no, don’t cry,” he looks around, notices that some other customers are now watching them, “don’t cry,” he repeats softly, holding her hand, “not here. my boss will kill me.”
( kkt—염소새끼 ) u drive a hard bargain, kid
(his eyes dart towards the ratty wallet sitting innocently on top of his bureau, all feathered edges and a few wrinkled bills jutting from the top. it looks pitifully thin but he bites the bullet and fires a shot back.)
( kkt—염소새끼 ) ok. ( kkt—염소새끼 ) i pick the place tho. ( kkt—염소새끼 ) what’s ur schedule like these days anyway
[ txt - min yoongi ] go hard or go home, hyung [ txt - min yoongi ] i’m free on wednesdays for lunch [ txt - min yoongi ] other than that only saturdays after work lol [ txt - min yoongi ] ok but [ txt - min yoongi ] no seafood [ txt - min yoongi ] you know i’m allergic [ txt - min yoongi ] right??? you know that right??
he would never make the same mistake again.
all of this is expected, which doesn’t mean it doesn’t hurt. it has been years since taehyun has seen jinwoo this close, or even heard his voice expressing anything but cold anger. every single interaction between them ever since that stupid day - taehyun too high, too far gone to even think of what he was saying, he just wanted to hurt; jinwoo, a hurt jinwoo, the worst kind, sending his parents proof of someone they probably already knew but didn’t want to think about - has been hostile. when taehyun got into college jinhee tried to trick them in some fake meeting of sorts, that ended up with taehyun almost thinking that going to jail for homicide wouldn’t be that bad.
and then everything after that was all jinwoo being an asshole, taehyun biting the bullet. but for the last few months they both have been in a non-existent relationship, rarely seeing each other on campus, never even acknowledging the other. which, to be honest, taehyun was ok with. he’s tired of being humiliated.
but now here he is.
taehyun sighs, offers jinhee an apologetic smile. he still feels embarrassed by all the shit he had said, shit jinwoo had told his sisters in great detail. he had repeated it to them, a year later, clean and sober, to crying jinhee (who was way more concerned with the fact that taehyun finally replied to her call) and to a cold heera (who was way more concerned with making taehyun feel like a fool). they all had forgiven him now, every single member of the kim family but his former best friend. but taehyun still feels guilty.
“i should be going,” he says, not even looking at jinwoo, “you have your brother to take care of you now.”
“no!” jinhee shouts, slamming her fists on the bed. “i want yogurt.”
taehyun furrows his eyebrows at her, a silent plea of “please, jinhee, don’t do this. don’t fucking do this.” but she just sighs, victorious, staring at jinwoo with a childish pout. the very same pout she used to make at them whenever she wanted to play together and they wouldn’t allow it. “and i want you two to go buy it. come on, oppa,” pout intensifies, “i’m on my deathbed, you can’t say no to me. be nice to each other!”
UTADA HIKARU (宇多田ヒカル) - 桜流し
young forever;
@kwtaehyun
( he’s been glowering continually for the past hour or so; from the time it took him to get ready, to actually reaching their unholy destination for the night. which, to be fair to taehyun, is a warranted outing, considering the amount of times he’s accompanied jungkook during sports matches and other varied ’boring shit’ (taehyun’s words, not his). but now that he’s here, standing in line with people dressed to the nines, he’d really rather be home, drinking his protein shake, and watching a movie with taehyun instead ) listen, tae (/ he turns to the dark haired boy, and he’s trying to control his expression but it probably shows, that distinct fuck-this-shit look he often wears because patience doesn’t quite exist in his book ) what’s the plan anyway? you planning to get shitfaced tonight?
( taehyun looks back at him, expression amused when he notices just how not down for it jungkook is. it doesn’t surprise him though, and also doesn’t make him feel guilty. he had his share of fucking testosterone for a good time the last few months, jungkook can stand one night out ) yeah. that’s pretty much my plan ( he replies and smiles brightly, giving the boy a sarcastic thumbs up ) counting on you to carry my drunk ass back home, friend ( friend. the word comes out easily now, even though his smile gets harder around the edges; faker. things are ok like this, taehyun is ok with this. he doesn’t need more. that’s what they say: fake until you make it ) kook, seriously, don’t make that face. it’s not that bad. ( he says, one hand nonchalantly fixing jungkook’s jacket ) i chose the straightest bar i know, you’ll be safe.
( kkt ↬ smelly🌹 ) that’s not very convincing ( kkt ↬ smelly🌹 ) um ( kkt ↬ smelly🌹 ) that’s exactly what you’re supposed to do?? ( kkt ↬ smelly🌹 ) ㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋ what the hell, taehyun
[ txt - lee jieun 🐷 ] it is the truth [ txt - lee jieun 🐷 ] and that makes no sense [ txt - lee jieun 🐷 ] i’ll only forgive you if you change my name on your phone to king taehyun and send me proof of it
@kwtaehyun
( kkt—염소새끼 ) hey ( kkt—염소새끼 ) what kind of shitty dongsaeng r u ( kkt—염소새끼 ) ur fav hyung got into the same school as u ( kkt—염소새끼 ) and u don’t even show ur face to say hi ( kkt—염소새끼 ) it’s been a week kim taehyun
[ txt - min yoongi ] well i can say the same [ txt - min yoongi ] you get into your fave dongsaeng’s school and don’t even pay for my lunch [ txt - min yoongi ] one meal, hyung [ txt - min yoongi ] that’s all i want [ txt - min yoongi ] then you’ll truly be my fav
“your standards are so low while you wait for me to realize i’ve been in love with you the whole time.” seunghoon jokes. “but it should be the opposite since i’m nao and you’re emo urehara.” another perk of living with seunghoon? countless dramas references. taehyun is truly blessed.
“i’m who?” he asks, an annoyed expression that quickly turns into no expression at all as he adds, “you know what? whatever, i don’t give a shit.” knowing seunghoon it’s probably some random ass reference to that stupid japanese drama he keeps talking about all the time.
he sits back down, crossed arm, his expression the epitome of fucking pissed off. he was supposed to be having a good night. fucking shit, he was supposed to be having sex. not sitting on a damn stupid couch talking to this ugly tall asshole. but taehyun has been learning in the hardest way possible that, as it is known, you can’t always get what you want.
“i would have warned you,” he says after a minute of silence which is something rare in a house with lee seunghoon. “but i was too busy trying to get in his pants to think about texting you. in all honesty, though, can’t you stand seeing me happy and having a healthy sexual life? is that too absurd?”
