synopsis : you hated jihoon from the bottom of your heart and it was very much reciprocated. when you discovered that heβd be your colleague for at least the three following years, you thought that the universe also hated you from the bottom of their heart. but when jihoon suggests to help you to finally go out with his brother, you see a spark of hope. but will it go as planned?Β
pairing : law ta!jihoon x law ta!reader
genre : e2l, childhood friends (kinda), reader has a huge crush for seokmin, jihoon and him are brothers, slow burn (or at least i tried to), jihoon is actually so whipped
word count : 10,1k w
a/n : this is me trying to romanticise my hopefully future self as a fellow teacherΒ
if someone had to ask you when you fell in love with lee seokmin, you wouldnβt be able to tell. was it when he gave you his last gummy knowing it was your favourite? or when he gifted you flowers for your birthday? or when he asked you to become his friend in kindergarten? really, you couldnβt tell because to you, his entire being was filled with love.Β
however, if someone had to ask you when you started to hate lee jihoon, youβd be able to answer right away. you couldnβt stand your best friendβs brother since the moment you met at seokminβs house, fifteen years ago. at first, you had felt incredibly intimidated. you were seven and, even if he was only one year older, you still had thought like he already knew all the secrets of the universe that were still locked to you. but then, you had ripped your knees accidentally and, instead of offering his help or at least showing a ounce of interest, he had contented himself with a scoff. a scoff. and you had watched him walking away, all alone, full of embarrassment and anger. you couldnβt believe someone as sweet as seokmin could have a brother as cold as jihoon. maybe he had been switched at birth?Β
while growing up, your hatred toward jihoon increased alongside your love for seokmin. every time you were around at your friendβs house, you constantly felt jihoonβs judging and piercing gaze in your back. because of him, you always felt like you werenβt doing enough, were too loud, too dumb, too slow. you hated how much he was able to control your emotions without giving a damn about your existence.Β
but now you got over it. you were twenty-two and were about to become your favourite law teacherβs youngest teacher fellow. you had a master degree in your back for godβs sake, you couldnβt let his opinion dictate your behaviour anymore, right? thatβs what you were repeating to yourself before knocking on your teacherβs door.
"hello professor yoon, i am so pleased to-"
your words got stuck in your throat as you recognised the man in front of you who clearly wasnβt your old teacher yoon.
"what are you doing here?" you mumbled sombrely.
rolling his eyes with annoyance, jihoon stepped back to let you inside.Β
"oh hello y/n!" professor yoon greeted you.
after inviting you to sit next to jihoon, the old man carried on :
"as you may know, jihoon is my phd student. i asked him to come over so he could help you find some marks since he had been a ta for a year now."
"thatβs really considerate of you professor," you thanked, trying to look as grateful as you should. after all, how could he knew that you hated your future colleague who you had thought was professor choiβs teacher fellow.
"regarding this yearβs organisation, i will send you my lectures and seminars this weekend. youβll need to read them and prepare them together so you can provide a similar correction to the students, is that okay with you?"
"perfectly. will you also give us your own correction?" you asked, fully immersed into your future job and as unaffected as you could be of your colleagueβs presence.
"only if you canβt manage to find a common ground. but if your outlines are the same it wonβt be necessary."
nodding, you addressed a smile to your professor who decided to switch subjects :
"well, now that this is settled, i wanted to remind you that if you ever feel the need, you can send me emails anytime. you both are my top priority so you can write your thesis peacefully. and if you have any question regarding the seminars, never hesitate to reach out to me or jihoon. i might be a little bit old school but i really like to see my teacher fellows getting along and helping each other and, given my age, you might be my last doctoral students so it would truly mean a lot to me if it could be like this until my retirement."
"of course professor, y/n and i both know each other since childhood actually. it wonβt be a problem at all so donβt worry too much about us," jihoon intervened before you could utter a single word.
refraining yourself from frowning or staring at him sceptically, you nodded vigorously. a smile upon your teacherβs lips appeared and, just like that, your first meeting ended.
the jihoon inside the room and the jihoon in front of you were definitely two distinct people. there wasnβt any other explanation cause, else, how could anyone be able to understand why the young man turned on his heels and left at lightβs speed. frowning, you started to run in order to catch him up.
"did you not hear professor yoon about the helping agenda?" you asked.
"you donβt need my help. the list and schedule of your classes will be sent by email as well as the list of students. if you know how to read a lecture about contract law then, you donβt need me at all," the young man answered with an arched eyebrow.
"and what about our meeting? for the correction?" you insisted.
"we can meet every monday morning."
"and-"
"listen, canβt you just email me? i am busy right now."
bitting your lower lip to contain your anger, you forced yourself to nod. once jihoon disappeared from the corridor, you scoffed :
"an email? seriously? couldnβt he give me his phone number?"
still mumbling, you walked toward the shared room with the other law ta. walking inside, you instantly felt weird when you recognised some faces who used to be your previous ta less than a year ago.
"oh hello y/n! greeted joshua, a corporate law ta, i didnβt know you decide to become a phd student, who is your thesis supervisor?"
"oh hello mr. ho- hum i mean j- joshua, you answered back, feeling awkward calling him by his name, itβs professor yoon."
"woah, you must be incredibly good! the young man exclaimed, i mean, i know you were good since i had you two years ago but still, professor yoon is such a hard professor to get as a supervisor."
"thank you so much but youβre giving me wait too much credit even tho i must admit i was really shocked when he suggested to become mine."
"it means that your also jihoonβs colleague, right?"
"indeed," you sighed.
at your defeated expression, joshua giggled and asked :
"did you have him as a ta too?"
"nope, god preserved me from him."
"then you shouldnβt be so worried if itβs because of his reputation, he is very different as a ta and as a colleague."
not wanting to go on about jihoon and your chaotic relationship, you decided to change subject, extremely thankful to joshua for not questioning your sudden switch at all.
when monday arrived, you realised that you didnβt set any proper meeting with jihoon. looking for an available table in the university library, you opened your computer to send him an email when your phone started to ring. rushing toward the exit of the library, you didnβt even get the time to ask who was your interlocutor that you heard jihoonβs tired voice :
"room 1a, south wing."
"okay than- did he just hang up on me?" you chocked.
taking a deep breath, you gathered the things you had left behind and walked toward hellβs gate.
without taking the time to knock, you came in and sat down, trying to look as casual as possible while taking your computer out.
"hello to you too."
side-eyeing the young man, you retorted dryly :
"oh sorry, i thought courtesy was a way-too-much waste of time for such a busy man. i can email you on that tho."
rolling his eyes exaggeratedly, jihoon bit back :
"itβs way too early for me to deal with your humour."
"i am not the one who told the other to piss off."
"i was busy."
"you always are."
"i donβt see how itβs a problem for you."
pressing your lips to remain silent, you tried to get your composure back and stated with a neutral tone :
"okay so todayβs seminar is about the fundamental principles in contract law. since today is an essay, i think itβd be best to ask the students about their knowledge and establish a issue after."
"right. then with their arguments, we should be able to set up an outline. this is the one i came up with," jihoon nodded before handing you a piece of paper.
recognising jihoonβs penmanship brought you an unexpected and unwelcome sense of nostalgia. you suddently remembered all the time seokmin and you begged him to help you study maths. jihoon was a strict and harsh teacher, even with seokmin and especially with you. you didnβt like to remember those times even if you always got the best grades with him and that the feeling of accomplishment when you were showing him your works -to which he didnβt even spared an eye- always warmed your heart. shaking your head to erase those memories, you realised with wide eyes that his outline was almost the same as yours. lending the paper back, your fingers brushed lightly and you withdrew almost immediately. noticing a switch into jihoonβs eyes, you couldnβt get the time to ask him about it that he asked out of the blue :
"are you still in love with seokmin?"
"sorry what?" you choked.Β
this definitely wasnβt the kind of question you were expecting from jihoon at all.Β
"i donβt l-"
"donβt lie to me please," he cut with a disdain grin.
"even if i did, it isnβt your business," you replied, mimicking his prideful expression.
"he is my little brother," he argued.
"and as far as i know he still has all his marbles," you bit back.
"two things can be true at the same time."
"maybe, but i still canβt phantom why youβre feeling concerned by it?"
"because i want to help you."
"sorry what? you choked on your saliva for the second time, why would your offer your help?"
"help" and "jihoon" were two words that youβd never thought could be used in the same sentence.
"isnβt it obvious?" jihoon asked with a grin.
"absolutely not. bro you hate me, remember?" you deadpanned.Β
"and?"
"and youβre not famous for being the altruistic sibling. nor the altruistic type at all."
rolling his eyes as if you were the dense one in this unreal conversation, jihoon got up after gathering his things.
"letβs talk in the language we both master the most. we can make it a contract : i help you with seokmin, you let me in peace until the end of my thesis. no meeting, emails only to share our outlines, i can tolerate other topics only if itβs strictly necessary and, last but not least, not a single word to professor yoon. i love and respect this man from the bottom of my heart, i donβt want to make him sad because i canβt bear your presence."
you didnβt even get the time to point out how lovely it was from jihoon to preserve his mentor or protest that youβre presence wasnβt as unbearable as he made it sound that he was already stretching his arm toward you, forcing you to grab his hand to seal your agreement.Β
"great, first advice, wear red next time you see him, this colour really suits you," jihoon told you dismissively before leaving like a thief.
staring at his silhouette, you thought that, for you, this was the most harmless agreement youβd ever seen and a great opportunity to make things happen. after all, you were a winner in this story, right? youβll get a boyfriend and cleared with a problem. plenty could think of a worse compensation. admittedly, it certainly wasnβt according to professor yoonβs vision of a great relationship between his phd students but he didnβt have to know it and, if you both respected the terms of the contract, he will never hear a word about it.Β
that was how your first official day as a teacher fellow went on. no need to say it wasnβt how you had envisioned it at all, probably because you hadnβt expected jihoon being your colleague. which apparently seemed extremely hilarious to your best friend. sat in front of you for your weekly meetings, he was laughing and clapping his hands as if you had just told him the funniest joke he ever heard.
"youβre the worst human being on earth," you mumbled, giving him a dirty look.
"come on, i canβt be worse than my brother," he teased while drying the corner of his eyes.
with a pout, you groaned :
"itβs funny for you because he loves you but not for me. i was expecting so much from this experience but i feel like iβll just be alone because jiβ hates me."
"donβt say that, he really likes you, seokmin reassured you, plus youβll be an amazing teacher, nevertheless."
"youβre straight up lying right now, arenβt you ashamed? you deadpanned, ignoring his compliment.
"iβm serious! when we were younger, he used to always praise you in order to force me studying," the young man insisted.
"i donβt recall that, you must be confusing," you refuted with a frown.
jihoon and praises were two very distinct words. he never told you anything that could come close a compliment. and saying "good work" with the most sarcastic tone wasnβt even close to it. maybe seokmin was mistaking.
"enough with your brother, tell me how work is going!" you groaned.
"youβre right! seokmin acquiesced cheerfully, i love him but i already see him all the time, no need to talk about him all the time too."
listening to your best friendβs story, you started to smile, getting lost in your contemplation. the winkles at the corners of his eyes when he was smiling, the shape of his lips similar to a heart, the softness of his cheeks, the beauty of his nose. damn, you really were a simp, right?Β
your silly smile never left you, even when seokmin walked you home after his insistence. thinking about jihoonβs agreement, you felt uneasy. why would he help you? were you this desperate? and this obvious? did seokmin noticed too? or is it another trick from jihoon only to embarrass you? this question made you sick but you immediately reasoned yourself. jihoon was stern, but he wasnβt malicious. he wouldnβt purposely destroy your friendship. unless he just wants the two of you to part ways and he wouldnβt have to deal with you? no, you were thinking too much. it couldnβt be that.Β
the following day, you walked to your classroom with a mixture of excitement and nervousness. being alone and giving a lecture wasnβt something you were used to and you used to be on the more introverted side. however, this was the best exercise if you wanted to become a university lecturer and researcher. youβre only fear was to be mistaken asβ¦
"hello! are you also in l/nβs class?" a cheerful voice asked in your back as you arrived in front of the roomβs door.
β¦ a student. turning around, you found a young man with a bright smile across the face, another student next to him with a more reserved expression.
"i heard she is a new fellow teacher alongside mr. lee so i donβt know how she is," the young man carried on.
"but if sheβs with professor yoon, it probably means she is super smart. i only hope she isnβt as stern as lee jihoon," his friend added.
"i am chan by the way! the young man introduced while extending his hand, and this is vernon, if youβre alone you can sit with us!"
awkwardly clearing your throat, you answered sheepishly :
"i am y/n l/n, youβre fellow tea-"
you didnβt even get the time to finish your sentence that colours instantly left chanβs face.
"i am utterly and deeply sorry miss l/n, i am so ashamed please donβt make us fail, we thought you were a student, we are so dumb please-"
"itβs okay, you giggled, trying to reassure him, i know i can look rather young plus i was just like you two months ago before the end of my master degree."
"but-"
"there is no harm, really. now please come in so we can start todayβs seminar."
after this incident, you appeared instantly more relaxed for your course which went surprisingly well. chan and vernon were great students and you were relieved to notice how cheerful chan was and participated without hesitation. when the class ended, you added that your office was open every day from 5pm to 7pm for tutoring hours, expecting to see one or two students at best.
however, you didnβt except to see ten students, including chan and vernon, to come at your office. apologetically, you kept five of them and invited the others to come by the next day.
"isnβt jihoon tutoring too? you asked surprised, during all my years as a student, we never had been more than three per day."
"mr. lee also does tutoring butβ¦ how could i put thisβ¦" chan started to explain awkwardly.
before he could add anything, vernon hit him in the ribs.
"i mean, we are just very interested in contract law and the way you explain it so clearly," the young man tried to save.
"you both lie extremely badly, which can be bad if you ever want to do tax evasion. tell me whatβs going on, asap," you deadpanned with an arched eyebrow.
"wellβ¦ itβs not that we hate mr. lee or that he is a bad teacher," a young girl named yeji started carefully.
"heβs just very stern?" her friend ryujin completed.
"why are you saying it as a question?" you asked.
"well he is your colleague, we canβt really badmouth about him," your last student of the day, yeosang, objected.
"right, you conceded before reassuring, i never had jihoon as my teacher but i know him since a long time ago. i have to admit that he is indeed stern but you know, he only wants the best for you, even tho he doesnβt sugarcoat it."
"he once told me i was the worst jurist he ever encountered," yeosang recalled.
"and that i look like someone whoβd peal rocks," yeji added.
"and that-"
"okay, you cut, trying to look cheerful, before suggesting, listen, i can talk to him about this matter if you want. else way, i wonβt be able to tutor every student that needs advice."
this suggesting might have been the worst idea youβd ever had. if you managed to reassure your students, you sensed that jihoonβs dirty look would kill you on the spot if it could.
"if the students have a problem, they could have come to me instead of crying in your lap," he finally mumbled.
"oh yeah, i could totally picture them terrified by you, coming to you to tell you this. especially with how welcoming and easy going you look. just see how youβre treating me, no wonder they wouldnβt want to tell you whatβs going on," you scoffed.
"you are babying them," jihoon concluded with a disdainful look.
"and youβre a pain in the ass, you countered back, your jaw tightening, iβm not a fool, i know not all of them are absolute gods of law but straightforwardly telling them that they are dumb isnβt helpful. listen iβm not criticising you, i just want to make it easier for them to reach out to you."
"how altruistic of you, the young man falsely chuckled, please, donβt tell me how i should run my classes. iβm a fellow teacher since two years now, while itβs your first week as one. i know how to manage this and you clearly donβt so stop interfering with things you canβt understand."
again, all you could feel from jihoon was pure disdain. and you were so familiar, too familiar with this feeling around him. clenching your fists to refrain yourself from beating him or saying something harmful, you managed to say in a stern tone :
"well, you know what, i am so glad that you suggested that we donβt see each other at all. and regarding your "help" with seokmin, i donβt want it. not from you at least."
and just like that, your turned on your heels and walked away, your heart in a million pieces inexplicably.Β
the following days, you discovered that avoiding jihoon was way easier than what you had expected. the boy was always in his office or at the universityβs library whereas you always spent your time with the others tas or at your office, tutoring your students. the latter must have guessed that you talked with jihoon and came out unsuccessful because the amount of them didnβt decrease in the slightest.Β
despite this incident, your life as a fellow teacher made you feel like you had finally found your place. you had all the time in the world to work on your thesis once you were done with classes and tutoring and you had found in your colleagues from other majors great friends -at least once i got used to seeing them as potential friends and not past teachers- especially joshua and his best friend jeonghan, a fellow teacher in social law.Β
every friday, you used to hang out with them at the nearest bar from the university and, on the weekends, you still had time to meet up with seokmin. your best friend knew about your argument with his brother but was considerate enough to refrain himself from questioning you about it.Β
it was as it always used to be after all. y/n and jihoon, the perfect opposite, the eternal fight. being colleagues didnβt change anything, you should have known better but to expect an improvement. and yet, you still felt a spike of disappointment.
looking at your watch absentmindedly, you stopped yourself from yawning for what seemed like the hundredth time. it was two in the morning and you were still in your office. usually, you were always at home at such a late hour but you were in december during exam season. because of administrative problems, you had ended up with more than a hundred work sheets to grade in three days. it was impossible. but you couldnβt do anything about it and you didnβt believe that you could allow yourself to ask professor yoon for a delay. he had high expectations, you knew it perfectly. you couldnβt ask for something like this when jihoon didnβt look fazed at all when you had learnt of your short amount of time to grade studentsβs works.
massaging your eyes, your vision started to become blurry and you noticed with surprise the tears on your cheeks.Β
"come on, stop crying, silly," you mumbled.Β
exhaling shakily, you tried to steady your breath with little to no success.
"you still have fifty papers dumbass, stop crying," you almost shouted.
despite your orders, you couldnβt stop tears from falling down nor could you think about anything else but jihoonβs words. you didnβt know how to manage a fellow teacherβs missions. you were so much behind him and will always be. you were always second to him. everything you knew, all the perfect grades you had, they were all thanks to him. even if you didnβt know he was professor yoonβs phd student, you used to always follow his university achievements.Β
but you were a mere copy of his talent. and today, you were finally revealing it. jihoon would never be in such a rushed situation. you could perfectly picture him, able to grade more than thirty works a day before lending them to professor yoon. you were pathetic. you werenβt enough.Β
"y/n? hey whatβs going on?" a distant voice asked.
frowning, you wondered who could it be, especially at this hour. you didnβt even noticed they opened the door, too busy crying like a baby. and since when were you on the floor? how ridiculous.Β
suddenly, you felt the warmth of two strong arms circling you and rocking you slowly.
"itβs okay, y/n. breath in and breath out, youβve got this," the voice whispered.
this relaxing voice⦠could it be seokmin? the spark of hope in your eyes died as quickly as it had come to life. in front of you, the one who was comforting you, was also the one you were comparing yourself to since the beginning : jihoon.
"what are you doing here?" you managed to croak.
just for a moment, you saw hurt in jihoonβs eyes. but it was quickly swept away by a mask of indifference.Β
"i was leaving when i saw lights in your office. i thought you had forgotten to switch them off but then i heard noises andβ¦ well, i am here. but i guess iβm not the one you were excepting."
bitting your lower lips, you were incapable of refuting him. that was also when you noticed that his hand was still in your back, stroking it with a unexpected gentleness. and you instantly taste this same old disappointment on your tongue. this gentleness wasnβt surprising because you knew jihoon could be the sweetest human being, just look at the way he treats his brother or professor yoon. no, it was surprising only because it was you.
you had joked for god knows how many times about jihoonβs hatred towards you but you had to face the truth : no matter what you could achieved, youβd never be enough. and, despite this, you always tried to prove him that you were worthy of his interest. because in your opinion, the you who met him at seven and the you whoβs being comforted at twenty-two, jihoon was the cleverest person you ever encountered.Β
abruptly drying your cheeks, you got up and mumbled monotonously :
"thank you for your help, jihoon. please donβt tell anyone about this. you can leave without any worries, i wonβt forget to switch off the lights."
from the corner of your eyes, you noticed jihoonβs mouth opening and closing itself slowly. and at this moment, you almost, almost, hoped that heβd insist on staying by your side. but he was jihoon and you were y/n. so he left.
after your breakdown, you never encountered jihoon, even when you returned your works to professor yoon. and now, with the two whole holiday weeks, you wouldnβt meet him, intentionally or not. somehow, in a way you couldnβt even describe but only feel, you knew something had broken that night between jihoon and you. but you didnβt know yet if you wanted to repair it or not.Β
apparently, you didnβt have a say in the matter because, as soon as seokmin heard that you were about to spend christmas alone, you were instantly dragged to his home. with jihoon.Β
"i canβt believe you were about to spend christmas alone without telling a word about it," seokmin pouted as you were walking in his home.
"hey itβs okay, itβs just a commercial celebration nowadays," you assured dismissively, when you actually felt so relieved to experience the warmth from the leeβs family.
"he is right! his mother insisted as she arrived to greet you, if you mother hadnβt told me they were leaving in japan for the week, i know youβd have hidden it from us."
pinching your cheek in a motherly way, she scolded you :
"how many times do i need to tell you that youβre not a burden here, youβre practically a part of the family."
after thanking her warmly, you laid your suitcase in the guest room.Β
"y/n, i made cookies, do you want to try some?" seokminβs voice screamed from afar.
"on my way!"
bursting into the kitchen, you almost bumped into the counter when you froze, your eyes locked on the figure sat on the opposite side : jihoon.
"oh hello," you mumbled sheepishly.
the young man acknowledged you with a simple shake of the head. everyone must have felt the awkward sensation in the room, except seokmin and jihoonβs mother who exclaimed happily :
"oh and y/n, jihoonie told me that you were also a phd student with professor yoon! congratulations, i know that he has the reputation to be quite strict when it comes to choosing fellow teachers, but nothing surprising coming from you. you always had been an amazing student."
you let out a giggle out of embarrassment with burning cheeks and answered :
"being a ta is way harder than what i excepted. i truly admire jihoon because he seems so at ease with everything."
suddenly, two strong arms were encircling you.
"enough with you ta stuff! seokmin declared, i am so happy to spend christmas with you! itβll feel just like old good days!"
your cheeks turned into flames and were burning like hell when he pressed a kiss on top of your head.
"i need to leave now or iβll be late at work," he announced, as casually as if nothing happened.
his tone made your heart clench as doubt started to sink into your veins. you always thought that seokmin saw you as a friend and nothing more. not great but still room for improvement. but what if he was actually treating you like a sister? youβd never be able to make him change his mind. thinking again about jihoonβs agreement, you started to wonder if he knew it too and was only making fun of you.
your train of thoughts was brutally stopped when you heard the source of your overthinking session calling you.
"yes sorry jihoon, what did you say?"
"i was wondering if youβd like to join me to find a present for my parents," the young man explained sternly.
eyes wide open, you slowly registered his words. did he just suggest you to join him? on his free will? who was he and what did he do to lee jihoon?
trying to think rationally, you thought that this might be a way to bury the hatchet and make it up to you since youβll spend a whole week together. or maybe he just turned insane. whatever reason it was, you wouldnβt let it go to waste.Β
"no way, you teased, we are the 22th of december and you still donβt have a present for your parents!"
"come on, i was busy," he groaned.
"you always are," you deadpanned.
"why does it feel like deja vu?" jihoon muttered.
"hm-mm, i donβt know but it must be pretty true."
"you really should consider the idea of shutting your smart mouth up sometimes."
"or what?"
"i know your weaknesses."
you were about to raise your eyes to the sky when the young man started to tickle you. wait what? to tickle you? what the actual fuck? jihoon never tickled you before, even when you were seven and especially when you were above ten.Β
tears were starting to form at the corner of your eyes until the both of you froze when his mom came in :
"okay i need to go too, see you toni-"
straightening your posture, you waved back until the door be closed.
"you made me look like a fool!" you accused.
"you always act like a fool in front of my mother, jihoon deadpanned with a roll of the eyes, donβt play the perfect angel now."
"speak for yourself! as for me, i have a present for my parents and yours," you retorted, raising your chin proudly.
"you know what? i take it back, i donβt need your company and you can stay here all alone," jihoon pouted.
"aww come on jihoonie donβt be so moody!" you gently mocked.
grabbing him by the shoulder, you commanded :
"grab your keys, i take my purse and i am ready to save you from being potential disinherited!"
behind you, you heard jihoonβs voice sighing :
"youβre so dramatic."
and if you could perfectly picture him rolling his eyes for the hundredth time, you didnβt miss the smile in his tone.Β
bitting your lips, your eyes were running everywhere else but to jihoonβs eyes. sat in front of each other in a coffee shop, you suddenly felt a wave of awkwardness. and it wasnβt only because realisation hit you like a truck when you registered that it was the first time you happened to be alone with jihoon in a setting unrelated to studies. no, it was also because your waiter and the barista behind the counter were no one else but chan and vernon.
"do you know them by any chance?" jihoon asked you with a puzzled expression.
"they are⦠they are my students, you mumbled, and probably old students of yours."
slowly nodding at your explanation, jihoon turned around in a not so subtle way and whispered :
"oh yeah i recognise the short one. i had him in introduction to civil law last year. bang chan or somethingβ¦"
"lee chan," you corrected, your face becoming a blushing mess.
"and why are you so worked up? do you have a crush on him? the young man asked with a smirk, i swear i wonβt say a word to professor yoon."
"not at all! you shouted before lowering your voice, i just feel weird encountering him in this setting, with you!"
Β at your last sentence, you noticed a strange look into jihoonβs eyes. something likeβ¦ hurt? did you really hurt him? in order to erase any doubt, you quickly added :
"i mean, since were are both his teachers, he must feel pretty uncomfortable and i feel bad for him."
"shame on him, i still want a coffee," jihoon deadpanned.
noting that his gaze became the same again, you let out a giggle. that was the moment chan chose to take your orders.
"hello dear customers, what would you like to drink today?" he asked with a forced cheerful smile, his pen and a notebook in his hands.
"iβd like a black coffee," jihoon started.
you were about to carry on but the young man swiftly shut you down :
"and a hot chocolate for her. with whipped cream please."
with a rushed bow, the younger man left, almost running for his life. as for you, you were still staring at jihoon as if a third eye popped out on his forehead -which might be the case seeing the current situation.
"what?"Β
"how did you know my order?"
"we know each other since fifteen years, itβd be a shame if i didnβt," he simply answered with a shrug of the shoulders, as if it was the most natural thing.
nodding hesitantly, you were about say something -anything to make you feel better knowing that you knew so little about him compared to him- when chan arrived :
"and here we go! a black coffee and a hot choco! vernon is the best at hot choco, youβll love it!"
clearing his throat when realisation hit him, he added :
"i mean, i hope you will, ahah."
"donβt worry, thank you chan," you reassured with the kindest smile possible.
absentmindedly stirring your beverage, you enjoyed the silence settled between you.Β
surprisingly, you tended to like those moment of silent around jihoon : it wasnβt heavy, nor awkward. it was just relaxing. you remembered all the time you met at the library during middle and high school. usually, seokmin came around only a few minutes before leaving for his volleyball practice, leaving you with jihoon. it those peaceful moments, you used to think that maybe, tiny little maybe, jihoon could like you, or at least bear your presence.
but this time, jihoon broke the religious silence. clearing his throat, he started, clearly uneasy :Β
"you know, about the last time we saw each otherβ¦"
"it was just a silly break down! you cut, as unsettled as him, i was a bit overwhelmed but iβll get better, i swear..."
recognising in his eyes a softness you started to be familiar with, you kept quiet.
"y/n, you donβt need to get better, you already are way more than enough. youβre an amazing lawyer and a fabulous teacher. those three days were really tough, for you and for me. anyone saying the contrary is a fool. professor yoon even apologised for the short delay and was scared that youβd drop the fellow teacher post."
hesitantly pressing your hand, he added :Β
"you shouldnβt feel pressured, you are perfect for this job. we are colleagues, you can share your burden with me if something similar happens -even tho i really hope it wonβt, thirty copies a day felt like a living hell."
shaking your head, you were about to thank him for his words when he carried on :
"okay now second adviceβ¦"
"but i broke up the agreement, you interrupted, plus we are seeing each other, right now."
"rightβ¦ jihoon conceded, but i didnβt anticipate your presence for christmas, it might be the moment for the perfect occasion with seokβ."
"okay, so a free advice, you teased, iβm all ears."
"you should both go to the skating rink this week. i know seokmin always wanted to try this. plus itβs a romantic setting, right? it might help you getting into the mood for confession."
"hey youβve got some great ideas sometimes!" you agreed frenetically.
clapping your hand in his, you finished your beverage in a single mouthful. and this time, you didnβt feel any bitterness when you noticed jihoonβs smile. was it because it became familiar? you couldnβt tell and you didnβt want to know the answer either.Β
christmas with the lee felt like home. after all, you knew them for so many years now and came by way too many times to be awkward. thankfully, their parents absolutely loved the present you had helped jihoon to choose and the latter had seemed extremely surprised when you had lent him a present box. Β
"what? youβre a pain in the ass but you still deserve a present, you had mumbled before adding nonchalantly, see it as a compensation since iβm breaching our not-so-broken contract."
rolling his eyes, you were about to tease him again when he took out a small pouch from his jacket.
"itβs nothing, he warned you as you excitedly took it from his hands, itβs just as a thank you for helping searching for a gift for my parents."
carefully opening it, you found a delicate gold bracelet with a purple beaded flower.
"how did you know my favourite colour was purple?" you asked.
"like i said, we know each other since fifteen years, itβd be a shame if i didnβt," he simply explained.
"still, thatβsβ¦ thatβs really sweet of you. this is really my type of jewellery."
you were about to add something else when seokmin suddenly intervened :
"hey what did you get, hyung?"
since jihoonβs present was still untouched, he started to unwrap it and revealedβ¦
with a proud nod, you covered the book adored with a black leather cover and golden letters. and when jihoon opened it, he discovered a dedication handwritten by your thesis supervisor.Β
"i know that you love him and his works so i thought it was good idea, you explained, slightly embarrassed, i hope you donβt have it already."
"it is perfect," jihoon declared.
"really?" you questioned hopefully.
"of course, thank you so much, this is one the best present iβve ever received."
and, to everyoneβs surprise, jihoon grabbed your arm before hesitantly hugging you.
"this⦠this means so much to me, thank you," he whispered in your ears.
blinking rapidly to refrain tears from falling down, you giggled at seokminβs groaned :
"this is such a law students move. he loves your book more than the necklace i gave him."
and, suddenly, for the first time in your life, you didnβt feel any bitterness but ratherβ¦ were it butterflies? freezing on the spot, you tried to act as naturally as possible the rest of the night but you couldnβt stop the thoughts in your mindβ¦ why the hell would you feel butterflies inside you around jihoon?Β
as jihoon predicted, your suggestion to go ice skating instantly seduced seokmin. after settling an afternoon when he was free from work, you both drove to the nearest park where you could join the stadium where an skating rink was opened only for winter season. excitedly, you both exchanged your shoes for ice skate.
but what you had clearly not anticipated nor jihoon had was how bad youβd be at ice skating. gripping on the sill as if your life depended on it -which could be the case- you groaned at seokminβs hysterical laugh.
"you are the worse best friend ever!" you spit.
"aww, come on itβs okay y/n, you canβt be good at everything!" he teased.
"look whoβs talking," you mumbled.
"hey hey i canβt hear haters! thatβs probably because iβm on top and your still struggling on the ground!"
"arenβt you being a bit too narcissistic? you mocked, i donβt see you doing triple axel."
"thatβs only because i donβt want to hurt your feelings."
"oh, how considerate of you," you cooed while rolling your eyes.
the both of you carried on for a whole hour and you finally managed to gain balance after three falls and seokminβs help.
when you both decided to put an end to seokminβs career as a professional ice skater, you suggested to grab a hot beverage.
"my fingers are frozen!" you complained.
"they wouldnβt if you had a better balance," seokmin laughed.
"i think you spend too much time with your brother, youβre so mean with me!" you whined.
saying that you felt relieved once your hot chocolate was between your hands was an understatement. noticing how quiet seokmin had become, you asked with a frown :
"somethingβs wrong seokβ?"
"no- no actually itβs quite the opposite."
still not convinced, you insisted :
"i know you since too many time seokβ. youβre hiding something from me, arenβt you?"
your best friend took a deep breath and, as you were expecting the worst, you sighed when a bright smile appeared on his features :
"i am dating someone."
your first reaction was shock. and then⦠nothing. no- actually not nothing. you felt happy. you felt genuinely happy for your best friend.
tightly hugging him, you exclaimed :
"oh my, iβm so happy for you! is it someone from work? can i meet them?"
"oh course you can! i talked about you so much, she also wants to meet you, he giggled, and yes, she is from work. but since weβre together since not so long ago, please donβt say a word to my parents or jiβ. i want to be sure and to let her be more comfortable to do that."
"ohh mystery mister lee, you teased, okay i keep that under my hat!"
cheering for him, you started to ask for pictures and anecdotes. as seokmin started to search in his camera rolls, you realised that you genuinely didnβt feel sad but rather extremely excited for him.Β
did you move on on him? how did you manage to do that, when you had a huge crush for the past fifteen years? or did you? shaking your head to stop the track of your thoughts, you deliberated that you could wait before envisioning the answers of these questions. unless you were actually running away from themβ¦ you couldnβt tell.Β
when the second semester started, you thought that you had another swap of jihoon. out of the blue, he spontaneously suggested to do tutoring sessions together and, after giving a try, you decided to carry on when you discovered how good you could be in tandem.Β
at first, this change surprised your students but only chan and vernon got the braveness to ask you about that, especially since the three of you used to see each other at the coffee where they were working. siping on your hot chocolate, the younger boy asked as he cleaned the nearest table :
"what happened this winter for mister lee to turn into such a teddy bear around you?"
"youβre exaggerating, you chuckled, we just know each other since childhood."
"i donβt see any causal link," vernon deadpanned.
"hey donβt insult your teacher," you groaned.
"youβre not our teacher here but a customer," chan observed.
"thatβs worse! you know i can fill a complain?"
"you wouldnβt do that!" he choked dramatically.
"donβt tempt me," you teased with a mischievous smirk.
"youβre not a law student for nothing," vernon noted while nodding his head to himself.
"anyway, i hope you liked how itβs working now cause i donβt think weβll change until the end of the semester," you picked up the conversation.
"well, he is still terrifying, but less around you," chan replied.
"i really like him, he is funny," vernon intervened -which didnβt surprised you at all, vernon was jihoonβs favourite even if he didnβt admit it, he even had the audacity to say that "i donβt do favourite" when you had confronted him about it.
with a satisfied nod, you finished your drink and left.
your new dynamic didnβt get unnoticed from your colleagues and seokmin either. the latter laugh like a hyena for five minutes straight when he realised you werenβt joking when you announced you had a dinner with his brother and, regarding your colleagues -or more specifically, jeonghan and joshua- you became their favourite target to tease.Β
at first, all their remarks used to be like water off a duckβs back. jihoon was a colleague, that was all, right? admittedly you had an unusual background because you knew each other since childhood but still.Β
but everything you believed in shattered in piece when you realised one day that you were straight up lying to yourself. it was a sunny day and jihoon had stopped by your office, suggesting that you could grab a snack together for lunch. nothing weird, right? but then, as jihoon had started to talk about a baseball tournament and an upcoming match, you had suggested :
"yankee are your favourite and they are playing tonight, you canβt miss them," you had explained.
"itβs okay, with time difference iβll be able to watch it tomorrow morning."
"thatβs funny you chose the yankee as you favourite team."
Β "why? they are too common for you?" jihoon had teased.
"no, itβs just that you love red so i thought youβd choose a team with red as their representative colour," you had observed with a shrug of the shoulders before adding that you didnβt know much about baseball nor did you understand its rules anyway.Β
jihoon seemed to see it as a blasphemy because he immediately started to explain you the rules. and, as you listened to him, you slowly realised that you did know things about him and, strangely, it felt oddly natural.
worse, jihoonβs presence by your side felt extremely natural now.Β
walking out of your office while humming to yourself, you felt satisfied with your day. locking the door, you noticed from the corner of your eyes that jihoonβs office had still its light on. deciding to suggest to go out eating something, you knock softly at his door. when you were answered by silence, you thought he left and forgot to turn off the lights. your hand on the handle, you heard a faint noise. your blood rushing to you ears, you recognised it immediately : it was a sob. bursting into his office, the vision in front of you broke your heart. jihoon was still here, crying in front of a mountain of books.Β
"hey, whatβs wrong, jiβ?" you asked as you rushed to embrace him.
your arms around his figure, you started to rock him. if you appeared calm and collected, you were internally panicking. you never saw jihoon cry, not in those fifteen fucking years around him during which he learnt your favourite beverage and colour. during which you realised that you also knew his favourite colour and baseball team. during which he never allowed himself to show his true feelings in front of you.
did he never feel comfortable enough to show how low he could sometimes feel? to talk about it with you? to seek your comfort and listening ear? you felt so mad at yourself. all you managed to say during all those years was that jihoon hated you and, when you finally got close to him, you didnβt even prove to him that you could be worthy of his trust.
"listen to me, breath in, breath out jiβ," you ordered softly.
slowly, you saw that the young man was following your breaths. smiling at him, you praised :
"yeah good job boy, just like that, take it easy. this is going to be okay."
diving your eyes into his, something inside you twitched. you didnβt know how, nor why but the second after, jihoonβs lips were on yours. his hand were on your jaws as if hanging from a lifebelt but not harsh enough to hurt you and your eyes wide open, trying to register what was going on.
jihoon parted away, his usually pale cheeks as red as pomegranate, he whispered :
"i am sor-"
unable to stop you, you grabbed him by the chin and kissed him back. pouring everything you had in this kiss, you felt him answering to your passion.Β
but passion ran with oil ; and once the blaze died, realisation hit you both.Β
"hum thank you y/n, i willβ¦ i will go home soon, donβt wait for me," jihoon muttered awkwardly.
"yes, right, you murmured shakily, rest well and see you around."
as you left, you experienced an old emotion you had thought and hoped died : bitterness.Β
the following weeks reminded you of the time during which jihoon and you avoided each other during the first semester but this time, keeping away from him was way harder. since you both had the same habits by now, you always had to flee in a rather not so subtle way.Β
for some reason, you couldnβt face jihoon nor your feelings and assumed it was the same for him. after all, he kissed you because of the pressure so it was forgivable but you? you kissed him back. you didnβt have any excuse but your feelings. which clearly werenβt reciprocated judging by jihoonβs awkward face whenever he saw you.Β
obviously, this sudden change didnβt get unnoticed from your colleagues nor your students. if the latter had the decency to question you about it, it clearly wasnβt your colleaguesβs type.Β
"did something happen with jihoon?" jeonghan suddenly asked while you were drinking a hot chocolate.
his question made you chocked and, without joshuaβs intervention, youβd still be laying on the floor.
"no, nope nothing wrong, why?"
"youβre the worse liar iβve ever met," the older man mumbled.
"please, youβre just hard to convince," you shot back.
"anyway, if you ever feel the need to talk about it, weβre here to help," joshua intervened.
"yeah, thank you both," you replied, grateful for their consideration.
giving classes became your favourite activity as a ta after tutoring. even if your work was rather lonely because you didnβt even exchange with jihoon anymore on your outline, you loved to meet your students and talk about law. you even thought that, once the year would be over, you could become great friend with chan and vernon.Β
"and thatβs it for todayβs seminar," you concluded.
"hum, sorry miss l/n, but i was a question," a student asked.
"yes, what is it about?"
"this correction is different from mister leeβs one, is it normal?"
raising your eyebrows, you tried to hide your surprise and explained :
"well, it is. i mean, you all know that there isnβt a single right outline and all the others are only fit for the trash, right? our two outlines just have different visions of the case."
after checking that your student was convinced, you felt relieved, ready to leave for your tutoring session.
you shouldnβt have feel relieved.
indeed, a week later, you received on your inbox an email from professor yoon -which clearly showed how angry he was because he absolutely hated using a computer. noticing that the email was sent to both jihoon and you, you immediately guessed what was the reason behind it.
"miss, mister,
i had the unpleasant information that the corrections your provided to the students for last weekβs seminar werenβt similar. did you not gather to discuss about it beforehand?
please come at my office at 5pm tomorrow, i think we need to discuss.
respectfully,
professor yoon."
shallowing shakily as you stared as your computerβs screen, you wanted to feel angry but deep down you knew that you were as much at fault as jihoon.Β
the next day, jihoon and you presented yourself in front of professor yoonβs office. it might be the first time you willingly were in the same room since three months. but the atmosphere was clearly far far away from celebration.Β
"i believe you both know why i both summoned you, right?" professor yoon coldly started.Β
feeling a cold sweat in your back, you were about to apologise when jihoon cut you off :
"i am the one at fault professor. i am sorry that the corrections we provided to the students werenβt similar. i was sick last week and couldnβt meet up with y/n to exchange about our workβ¦"
"i am not only talking about that and you both know it, the teacher interrupted, i know that you do not talk at all! i can hear the students! i could let it pass because i didnβt hear any complain about divergence of correction but now? i donβt care if youβre unable to stand the sight of the other but you have to work together! i wonβt stand an immature attitude from neither of you. youβll face numerous situations in your professional career where you have to work with people you hate but you wonβt be able to avoid them ad vitam eternam, understood?"
"yes professor," you both whispered sheepishly.
"good, now get out of here," he ordered.
feeling nauseous as you walked out, you were about to talk to jihoon but the young man was already leaving. but this time, you wonβt let him put distance between you.
brushing into jihoonβs office, you found said man cleaning up his desk.
"didnβt you hear professor yoonβs words? you know, about the avoiding agenda."Β
"hello to you too," jihoon mocked.
"i am not in the mood for you humour," you shot back.
"then what are you in the mood for? i am all yours for the moment," he asked with a fake sweet tone.
"why are you avoiding me?"
"sorry what? i am the one avoiding you? are you sure?"Β
"well, i am the one who came to see you," you argued.
"because professor yoon asked you to! but since the moment we kissed, you didnβt spare me any glance!" he finally shouted vehemently which was so unusual coming from jihoon.
"i-"
"donβt lie to me, you did! i was so ready to put my feelings aside like i always did! i know you kissing me was a mistake, that youβd like to kiss seokmin instead, i really do! and i am so so sorry, so utterly sorry, you have no idea. loving you while fully knowing you only have eyes for him is such a curse, you donβt even know how hard it is!"Β
staring at jihoon completely speechless, you withstood without flinching every words like a landslide.
"i loved you since the moment i met you. i loved you when we were seven and eight and i will love you when we will be ninety and ninety-one. and i can bear you hating me or loving my brother but i just canβt stand your avoidance. i am really trying to get over you, i really do. but itβs so damn hard. please donβt push me away again, i can put my feelings aside."
hearing his voice breaking, his pleas, his tears. all of this because of you. it felt unbearable. embracing him softly as if he was made of glass, you whispered :Β
"i donβt want you to walk away from me, jiβ."
rocking him gently like you did not so long ago, you added with a smile :
"unless you want me to fulfil my part of our broken contract."
once the both of you parted ways, jihoon breathed in deeply. regaining his composure, he started to continue clearing his office.Β
"i learnt that seokβ is dating someone from work," he announced as casually as if he was talking about the weather.Β
"yeah i know, he told me this christmas at the skating ring."
widening his eyes, jihoon mumbled :
"and you didnβt even tell me?"
"iβm his best friend, i canβt spread his secrets. especially to his brother," you pointed out mischievously.
without stopping himself in his tracks, he sighed and youβd bet your life on it that he playfully rolled his eyes.Β
"it might have been a great thing that you broke up our agreement after all. it was a stupid idea and i didnβt help at all."
"i do think this is a good idea too, you nodded while taking a step closer, but not because seokmin is dating."
jihoonβs hand froze at your words. frowning confusedly, he asked :Β
"then why?"
"because i donβt care about him. kissing you wasnβt a mistake."
"sorry what?"
"i. donβt. care. about. him, you repeated while detaching each syllable, kissing you was far from a mistake nor that iβd wished it was seokmin."
"but-"
"it has always been you, i only want to kiss you and only you, lee jihoon," you cut.
finally, jihoon raised his head and what you read in his eyes was absolutely overwhelming and magnificent : a beautiful storm of hope and love.
"you better not be jokingβ¦"
"come on, good faith is a fundamental principle of contract law," you giggle.
your laugh was quickly stopped by jihoonβs lips on yours. unlike the first time, it wasnβt rushed, quite the contrary. after such a heated confession from his part, your love well-deserved a soft one from yours, right? his hand softly cupped your jaw while the other slowly stroked your hair. cautiously, he moved away, without detaching his eyes from yours.
"after all, maybe professor yoon will have fellow teachers who get along and help each other," jihoon teased.
"come on, you make it sounds like you only kissed me for him," you scoffed.
"oh really? he gently mocked, then i definitely must kiss you for you know."
"youβre such a jerk," you groaned.
not letting him the time to win this argument, you grabbed him by the collar of his shirt and kissed him again.Β
if someone had to ask you when you fell in love with lee jihoon, you wouldnβt be able to tell. was it when he used to always leave a seat for you, even in crowded rooms with your two families gathered? or when he had taught you how to play the piano after hearing you complain that your parents never let you sign up for lessons? or maybe when he used to leave you a snack as a congratulations for your perfect grade in maths? really, you couldnβt tell because to you, his entire being was filled with love, even if it took you some time to admit it.
a/n 2 : if you managed to stay until here, thank you so so much. i hope you liked this fic as much as i love writing it even tho it took me some time to finish it, i wanted to write it properly, even if it meant taking three months to do so
@/som1ig 2024 | all rights reserved | do not plagiarise
for @ddeonghwa-s secret cupid collab i recieved you @haologram! Secret Cupid Masterlist found here!
Pairing: roommate! Minghao x barista!afab!reader
Word count: 14.1k
rating: R
Summary: Xu Minghao had been the most ethereal being you've ever laid your eyes on to the point being unable of functioning like a normal person, but now you're roommates. Only time will tell when you lose your mind keeping your hands to yourself, so there needed to be a list of things you don't do if you wanted to be a good roommate.
tags: meet-ugly, strangers to roommates to lovers, college au, barista au, down bad!reader, mentions of band, brief bdsm, mc fell first he fell harder, cum swapping, spitting, oral (giving and receiving), face riding, unprotected sex
author note: thank you @lovetaroandtaemin and @gyubakeries beta-reading this with me. after writing towtsyfdtotbycf (holy shit) i was in a little bit of a slump and had several and i mean SEVERAL versions of this and for months racked my brain how i wanted to do this. Alta, i care for you deeply and we've gotten close in the last year or so, so i really wanted to write something that would amuse you and that you'd enjoy. and if you hate it you can use it as leverage to berate me on discord lol. but please, my valentine, enjoy my gift to you. happy Valentines day Alta (and tell me was i really not that slick) <3
When you first met Minghao, you almost killed him trying to save his life. At least, that's what you thought you were doing.
All you had to do was bear a normal shift at the Coffee Shop, attempt a semblance of a smile for the oncoming customers, and clock out at your normal hour, but the universe couldnβt even give you that. Instead, they sent you the hottest guy imaginable, along with the swiftness of a gazelle, the strength of a gorilla, and the intuition of a garden gnome. That day just confirmed that some things were better left alone.
A few things were already going wrong that day. For one, your alarm didn't go off. The alarm being your mom, who usually kicked you out of bed first thing at 9 am, since she had a doctorβs appointment. Fair enough. The strings of fate got you there. All the more reason why moving out seemed like a distant dream rather than a close reality. Were you really capable of being a functioning adult?Β
Then there was the bus and having to shell out twenty bucks for a Lyft when the next scheduled bus was reported to have broken down and was no longer an option. That twenty bucks couldβve been your meal for the next week, but no, being fiscally responsible was a circus act, and you were the clown being pied in the face repeatedly. As if you werenβt already putting on a face and juggling multiple things enough on a daily basis, today was no different.Β
And then, you were late to workβwhich again, was nothing newβbut you were hoping that Nayeon, who was scheduled as the shift manager, sheβd let you off with a warning. Yet, somehow, that went wrong as well, seeing that the shittier manager on your shift, Manager Fi, was present instead. And, by the look in the old man's eyes, he wasnβt happy about it either, especially considering he assigned you bathroom duty for the end of your shift to make up for your tardiness. He never liked you since you started. Then again, he didnβt like anybody, and vice versa.
This morning was bad omen after bad omen.
Leading up to finally meeting Minghaoβtall, scorchingly hot Minghao, , with lips that looked soft as clouds. You hadnβt seen him around before until today, and perhaps it shouldβve stayed that way, because you couldnβt see yourself facing him ever again.
He walked in with his large group of friends, all almost nearly as charming as him with a handful of faces that youβve seen once or twice, but none that stood quite out like his. He had the kind of face that made you want to paint murals, write ballads, or stare long enough to linger too long over the same spot you were cleaning on the counter, windshield wiping until the wet streaks you wiped off devolved to discoloration and damaged the countertopβs cheap sealant. Eventually, you averted your gaze to conceal your flushed cheeksβturning away in clear embarrassment, thinking about how much of a fucking creep you probably looked overtly gawking at himβbut youβd soon realized that was the least of your worries. Youβd soon wish it ended with you looking like a creep.
The next moment you lifted your eyes towards him again, you found him in a compromising position, one that had you thinkingβand that was your first mistake. His face twisted with discomfort, and he gasped as he covered his mouth. A million thoughts raced through your mind, considering all the possible reasons for his distress, and one screamed the loudest above all, setting off alarm bells. So youβbeing meddling and troublesome youβacted on instinct.
Hopping over the counter, you raced towards him, pulled him off the booth which he was luckily on the edge of, and immediately attempted the Heimlich. Finally, your CPR certification could be put to use. You embraced him from behind, putting pressure on his ribcage as you launched and thrust yourself against him, forcing whatever was lodged in his throat out of his body.
βIβve got you!β you exclaimed heroically.
You put in as much strength as you could muster, truly hoping to save a life today, thinking out of all things that have gone wrong today, at least this would be one thing youβve done right. You could feel your ancestors looking down on you to witness a proud moment in your otherwise boring and mundane life.Β
After several rough collisions with his body, he eventually spat something chewed up and unsightly onto the boothβs table, drawing the attention of several onlookers if your boisterous shouting hadnβt already. His friends were quick to look away, wincing in disgust while the cute boy doubled over in pain, holding himself by the ribs as you ran your eyes over at him in concern.
βAre you alright, sir? That mustβve been terrifying to suffocate on something so suddenly.β
He then finally lifted his head. His cheeks were flushed as anguish took over his features. βI wasnβt choking,β He rasped.
β...Come again?β
βOh my god!β A third-party witness stood up dramatically from their seat. βThis barista just saved this young manβs life!β
Suddenly, you were punished with attention, cheers specifically. All except the people who sat at the cute boyβs table clapped for youβor, rather at you nowβand gave you standing ovations for your grand heroic act, when in fact, it wasnβt heroic at all. Meanwhile, you attempted to settle them down, flapping your hands dismissively and growing hot all over. You looked over the man you so-called saved as he strained to sit back in his seat, being tended by the friends he came with.
βDude, you okay?β
βShit, that looked like it hurt.β
βYou probably shouldn't have been drinking it that fast, Minghao.β
It turned out you had severely miscalculated the situation. What appeared to be choking, prompting you to improperly administer a rough but appropriate Heimlich maneuver, was simply a mildly exaggerated reaction to hot coffee followed by a muffin to alleviate his burnt taste buds. You, of course, profusely apologized, as if you werenβt embarrassed enough for staring at him the whole time working your entire shift at the coffee shop because he was the most breathtakingly stunning person youβve ever seen in your life. You mightβve just about broken his ribs and made his life flash before his eyes by abruptly slamming your body against him repeatedly, and not in the fun way.
Rather than an apartment, you were in desperate need of a hole deep enough to lead you to the core of the Earth to hide you from everyone else on the crust, ideally with cheap rent and good air ventilation.Β
You bowed your head in humiliation, unable to meet any of their eyes, especially with the possibility of them remembering your face with a lawsuit waiting to happen. βI canβt believe that happened, I am so sorry. If thereβs anything I can do to make it up to you, please let me know.β
βItβs okay, really, but I think weβve had enough excitement for today if you donβt mind.βΒ
The attractive strangerβor Minghao, as youβve learned from his friends who immediately rushed to him in concernβshook his hand in the air reassuringly. βJust, no more of that, alright? Make sure someoneβs actually choking before trying to save them.β
βRight, please have a wonderful rest of your day,β you said, before returning to your station and disappearing behind the breakroom, screaming into your cubby and avoiding human interaction for as long as you could.
That scene replayed in your mind over and over like a recurring nightmare, burning the image of his beautiful face with such disdain for all eternity, while his name etched into your brain in permanent ink, embedded in every wrinkle in your brain. Minghao. A devastatingly beautiful name for a devastatingly beautiful owner.
Ugh. Get a fucking grip.
You just needed to get through the rest of the day. It would just be a couple more hours until your shift ended, and then youβd leave on the dot. Itβd be just in time to make your appointment to meet your new potential roommate. Hopefully, it would be the silver lining of todayβs catastrophic mess.
You met on electronic class forums while attending the same Cultural Studies course and somehow ended up relying on each other for notes. By your chat history, you seemed to have a lot in commonβwith the exception of his preference for tea over artisanal coffeeβand youβd be lying if you said you didnβt get giddy seeing the green circle next to his username. Recently, he had just talked about moving into town after pondering the idea for so long, and as fate may have it, youβve been looking for your own place to stay. You figured he seemed nice enough, and he even offered a reasonable quote on rent. It wouldnβt hurt to take a look. You just hoped he was as friendly in real life as he was onlineβwith the day you had, you needed a win.
And, that win started with Chinese food, his choice, and it was a good one. You hadnβt been at this location before, taking note of the old-fashioned aesthetic touched by the harshness of modern neon signs that lit even the darkest of hallways. You were now thinking you ought to come more often as the heavenly notes of soy, ginger, and whatever concoction bled through the kitchen curtains and wafted through your nostrils the moment you passed through the double doors. Immediately, you were greeted by the host, visibly tired and overworked, with dark circles under his eyes, before he led you to a table in the center of the restaurant. You settled your nerves with a glass of water, trying to let the horrific events from today fade to as black as the soy sauce loitering on your table, waiting for a plate of dumplings to accompany them.
Funny how you could still have an appetite after everything that happened.
It wasnβt too long after you heard the same doors you walked through open, setting off the familiar sound of its wind chimes. You peered behind you, catching a glimpse of the new arrival, and immediately spun back in your seat, startled by the face that passed through your eyes. Trepidation brewed within you as the unsolicited visitor had your stomach in knots.Β
You couldnβt take another incident tonight.Β
You slunk into your seat, burying your chin in your shirt, hoping youβd somehow camouflage into your seat, facing away from the new arrival. Meanwhile, his eyes skimmed the room, walking in with purpose without guidance and greeting the employees as if he were right at home. Fortunately, he had yet to notice your presence as you slinked out of view the moment he passed by you to sit at the bar, while you made way into a booth in the dark corner of the restaurant, cursing the fates for their cruel games once again. You just had hoped that your new roommate would hurry it up already so you could get out of here before you were discovered.
And after about ten minutes, it felt as if all hope was lost. There was no sign of them and you were wondering if you had been stood up. Amid your anticipation, you were forced to pay attention to the person you were avoiding, seeing his patience wear thin with the tap of his foot as he sipped the last of his iced tea. Not a moment too soon, you saw him pluck his phone out from his pocket, fingers skittering over the screen before bringing it to his ear and scanning the restaurantβs floor plan. In the same instant, your phone went off,Β blaring your cursed ringtone, βPocketful of Sunshineβ, and the realizationβalong with the panicβquickly set in.Β
Alerted by the noise, his head whipped up from his screen. His eyebrows rose in shock, not all expecting the outcome that arose, and he dropped to his feet and quickly darted toward the sound that youβfor the life of youβcould not turn off fast enough. His footsteps matched the rate of your heart pounding in your chest, growing louder and closer until he found the source and located you cowering in the corner.
You lifted your head to lock eyes for the first time since this morning just as you finally managed to silence the ringtone and gave him an awkward laugh, waving with your phone in hand. Taking a nervous gulp, you awaited his disappointment, expecting him to make his quick exit after evaluating in the two seconds of your meeting that this arrangement would not work out because you were a deranged psycho with a savior complex. To your pleasant surprise, that didn't happen. Instead, you were met with a gentle smile and a glint of curiosity in his eyes. βThere you are.β
You forced a sheepish chuckle. βHere I am, ha.β
Minghao softly chuckled before tucking his phone in his back pocket. βAnd to think just this morning you βsaved my life.ββ
You shut your eyes tightly, hands pressing together as if begging for forgiveness. βAgain I am so, so sorry for that. It did look like you were choking.β
He shook his head reassuringly. βSo youβve said. Iβm Minghao, or PalE8. Nice to meet you, CafeMixr0.β
βIs itβ¦nice to meet me?β You asked dubiously.
βWhy wouldnβt it be?β
You blinked incredulously. βWell, for several reasons.β
He shrugged before entering the booth and leaving a healthy distance to sit just across from you. βCanβt think of any. Have you ordered anything yet?β
You shook your head, befuddled by his nonchalance, waiting to see the catch, if there was any.
βGood thing I know everything worth ordering.β His hand shot up before grabbing the attention of a server to get his order taken.
You weren't sure where the night was going. All you knew was the boy that you almost killed this morning was sitting across from you looking as breathtaking as he did this morning, even while slurping up his stir fry that was glossed with a sheen of chilli oil and swelling up his already full lips. Rather than a roommate meetupβif that was still the caseβit felt like a date, a date you were exceedingly ill-prepared for.
Suddenly, you could feel the sweat on the back of your knees, feeling the strong urge to sniff the clothes on your back, unsure when the last time you did a fresh load of laundry and if your current attire was included in that load at all. Not to mention that bathroom duty that was forced upon you, which no doubt seeped into your clothes. You were better off naked, but then that would be an entire different kind of meeting, wouldnβt it?
βYouβre okay, right?β You asked, trying to distract yourself from your spiraling thoughts as you barely finished your portion of chow meinβwhich was absolutely heavenly, to put it lightly.
He let out a light chuckle before kindly reassuring you. βHow many times are you going to ask me? You and everyone from this morning. Iβm fine, able-bodied and everything.βΒ
βI just felt really bad. You looked really hurt.β
He couldnβt suppress his grin, finding your cautiousness amusing, but it only added to your unease. βI was hurt. Youβre really, really strong.β
You winced. βAgain. I am so sorry.β
βDonβt be. Itβs a quality of a good roommate.β He finished the last bit of his meal before dropping a couple of bills without asking for the tab. βCome on. Iβve got to show you the apartment.β
You raised an eyebrow while sipping your warm tea before tapping your mouth with a napkin. βYou still want to room with me? After this morning?β
βThereβs not a lot of good options for roommates in the city, and what are the odds that youβll try to kill me twice?β
He had a fair point, and it wasnβt like you had options lining up either. You just had to hope he didnβt regret taking this chance on you.
A big reason why you wanted to move out was to learn to be on your own, but in addition to that, the city had pretty much everything to offer. The city had it all, from job opportunities to the right people to meet, and the apartment Minghao led you to was the center of the entirety of it. High above the town square, in a room several floors up, there was a nook that had a view through a large window overlooking everything within about a two-mile radius. If there was anything nice to say about the city, it definitely looked better from where you were standing. The street lights illuminated streets, neon signs brought the local businesses to life, and people that ran the night life lived it to the fullest in the flashiest clothes imaginable. You had never seen your city like this before.
Meanwhile, the apartment itself was gorgeous and already fully furnished with stylish furniture and greenery that touched the kitchen and living room. It was graced with Minghaoβs taste in art and an eccentricβbut tastefulβcolor palette of warm browns, olive greens, and rustic oranges. It felt like walking into Minghaoβs mind, seeing into his world, and you were given the opportunity of it being yours, being part of his world. He was generous enough to even let you pass through the front door.
βSo?β he asked, gauging your interest, watching as you looked down at the city from the large window nook in awe.
You softly scoffed, unable to take your eyes off the beautiful view calling to you like a siren at sea.Β βUm, Iβm sorry, you had trouble finding a roommate, how?β
He crossed his arms, admiring the sight with you, glancing at you through his peripheral vision and grinning when he saw the childlike sparkle in your eyes. βIβm new to the city, and everyone I know here has their own living arrangements. I didnβt want to go too far in looking for a new roommate. I thought we'd work well together, since weβre based in the same city now and have a lot in common based on our conversations.β
βI almost killed you this morning,β Youβve pointed out toβ¦death.
βAlthough youβreβ¦impulsive and unpredictable, Iβve seen worse. I think Iβll manage.β He splayed his hand in front of you, gesturing for a shake to officially seal the deal. βWhat do you say? Do you still want to be roommates?β
Everything about this screamed it was a bad idea. Putting aside the fact that you nearly killed the man, you could barely stand in the presence of him without your mind drifting to dark waters. It didnβt take rocket science to understand that putting you in that same living quarters with Minghao meant you might have to live every day together with your hands tied behind your back and thighs taped shut. Youβve surprised yourself with how youβve managed to keep your composure sharing the same airβthe air you were even thinking of savoring as you contemplated this offer.
You were down-righteously-bad. You werenβt a fit roommate for Minghao in the slightest.
Yet, you took his hand, letting his cool palm clash with your warmth as his digits wrapped around you in a tight squeeze before shaking. βLetβs do it.β
And that marked the start of a new chapter of your life, unraveling the challenge of being Xu Minghaoβs roommate. Only, he wasnβt the challenge. He was a breath of fresh autumn air. He was kind beyond words and accommodating in every step of your move. You were already familiar with his gentle and patient nature, as he had frequently taken the time to clarify complex ideas for class, and youβve learned about the majority of his interests prior from your online discussions, but seeing PalE8βs traits in personβembodied in Minghaoβwas bizarre. You realized he was still a stranger after all. A stranger that claimed your breath with a single bat of his eyes and turned your stomach inside out worse than a bad case of food poisoning, no less.
Meanwhile, the neighbors knew him by name, were endeared by his presence, and found him to be a delightful conversationalist as well as a helping hand when the situation called for it. He was better than your friendly neighborhood spiderman. He was your kind, considerate, intricately woven, beautifully complex, and knees-bucklingly handsome Minghao.Β
You werenβt usually a sexual deviant, at least not to this extent, but Minghao brought something out of you that you hadnβt felt for another person. However, if you were going to live together, that had to change. This crush was going to have to dwindle out of existence if you wanted to live togetherβemphasis on youβin peace.
So, thatβs when you decided to make a list of rules that only you had to follow. Sure, you were an adult, and the thought of giving yourself rules to keep your hands to yourself was juvenile and stupid, but for the sake of your sanity, you were looking for anything that might work. Thatβs when you decided to make a list of things βgood roommates donβt doβ, thinking it would be shorter and easier to sum up than a long redundant list of things good roommates would do, and the first thing to top the list was easy.
Good roommates donβt almost kill each other (again).
That seemed easy enough to remember, considering the first time was traumatic enough, and fortunately, it didnβt take too much effort, considering you hardly saw each other despite living together.Β
You ended up taking up more shifts at work, desperate enough to even join the catering team, to keep yourself busy and afford the new expense of rent, sacrificing a lot more of your free time. Meanwhile, Minghaoβs work schedule was not only demanding, it was inconsistent. Working at a popular art gallery as an artist and attendant with frequent and erratic events to go to until late at night prompted your roommate to be seen home a lot less than expected. By the time either of you got home, there wouldnβt be so much of a hello or goodbye either, just the sounds of bodies falling on beds in either rooms as the dayβs fatigue engulfed you until you succumbed to sleep.
Youβd be lying if you said that you werenβt a little disappointed by these circumstances, but then again, perhaps it was a blessing in disguise. Seeing him as little as you did meant less opportunity for you to screw things up around him, because it seemed to happen quite frequently when he was around. The few times you did cross paths, you still found ways to humiliate yourself.
βThatβs mine.β
You held the toothbrush mid-scrub, bubbles foaming at the corners of your mouth, βEh?β
βI think youβre using my toothbrush.β
Your cheeks immediately grew warm, and you shielded your face with the back of your hand. You spat into the sink and splashed water on your face to rid yourself of toothpaste residue before turning back to respond, his words jumbling in your head and bouncing from corner to corner to process them. βI-I donβt think so, this is the one I always use.β
He snickered, leaning against the door frame and crossing his arms, delectably dressed down in a gray tank top and sweatpants. The tempting taste of domesticity was sweet and permeated your tastebuds. βIf thatβs the case, weβve been sharing, because Iβve always kept my brush there in the marble cup. Yours should be behind the medicine cabinet where you first left it.β
βWhat? You sure?β you pinned the used toothbrush on the sinkβs porcelain before cracking open the medicine cabinet. βIβm pretty sure I took itβAh!β
Startled by your findings, you dropped the toothbrush you gripped in your hand onto the floor when youβve proven Minghao right as his toothbrush fell to the ground, now defiled with your oral bacteria and whatever was on the floor. The one day you take a shift later than usual because a member begged to take on more shifts, it blew up in your face. Seokmin, you will rue the day. βI-Iβll clean it!β You offered in a panicked tone.
He pushed himself off the threshold, waving his hand dismissively. βDonβt, please. Itβs dirty; I can just replace it.β
Filled with guilt, you stepped aside to watch him pick up the dirty brush before disposing of it in the waste bin, βSorry.β
βYou say that a lot.βΒ
He pulled a fresh toothbrush out of a drawer and ripped it out of its packaging. It was notably identical to his previous and your current abandoned toothbrush, down to the bristles. βNo worries. See,β he turned the new hygiene tool for inspection, βClean.β
βRegret having me as a roommate yet?β you joked anxiously towards his reflection in the mirror.
He chuckled, shaking his head. βNothing I canβt manage. I lived in a boarding house full of guys that shared things without asking and it didnβt stop at toothbrushes. Youβre the first roommate Iβve had thatβs apologized. I say thatβs an upgrade.β
He went on to brush his teeth with his newly obtained brush, christening the bristles with a squeeze of fluoride toothpaste before scrubbing against his pearly whites. He never ceased to amaze you with his aloof attitude towards the situation, as if heβd become accustomed to your chaos when he didnβt need to be at all. This situation, however, did indicate that you had another thing to be added to the list.
Good roommates donβt use each otherβs toothbrush (even by accident)
In your room just before you left for work, you haphazardly added to the list you put on a crumpled piece of paper you kept in your wallet, ensuring you held your list close before setting the pen aside. Your heart pounded against your chest, thinking what that had meant all this time. How youβve pretty much swapped saliva nearly every day with Minghao since moving in. The fact that it had gone on for so long repulsed you, but not anymore than the tiny part of yourself that maybe had always known and continued to do it.Β
You held your digits to your lips, brushing the pads against the slit of your mouth, ragged breaths slowly leaving your lungs as you reached your enamel. Tension pooled in your stomach as the images that infiltrated your dreams were currently being conjured in your consciousness, while arousal chased down your legs as you clenched them together. Jolted back to reality, you wound your eyes shut, remembering how little he cared about the matter, how nonchalant he was when he found out. Meanwhile, here you were: perverse, losing your mind, and letting your imagination run wild like a hormonal teenager with her celebrity crush.Β
Fuck. You needed a night out. You had been cooped up in the apartment for too goddamn long. The only other place you went was work, and knowing labor laws, they had to give you a night or two off for all the time youβd been putting in. There was a whole outside world, and you needed to buck up and take advantage of it. You had to do something other than fawn over your very hot roommate. Losing some spare change was worth the sanity. At least, you hoped it was.
βYou going out tonight?β
Hearing a familiar tenor voice, your head lifted up from fixing the strap of your shoes to see him remove his coat and store it away in the front entrance closet. βOh, youβre home,β you stated.
βYeah. The gallery is closed tonight for a bigger show this weekend, so I have a couple days where Iβm off earlier than usual.β
More time for Minghao to be at home. Great.Β
You nodded, keeping your cool at the sight of his turtleneck hugging his lean and toned frame, making your heart work overtime in place of you this evening. βI see, but yeah. A couple of my friends and I are trying out that new place that just opened up in midtown.β
βOh, let me know how that goes. Me and some friends had plans to go there too.β
βOkay.β You hurried your way to the door. βDonβt wait up.β
βWait.β
Hand on the door knob, you cursed under your breath, squeezing your eyes shut as if bracing for impact before opening them, and turned around with an innocuous expression. βYes?β
He held out his hand. βYour phone please.β
βHmm? Why,β you asked, unlocking it before complying.
He smiled accepting it, before swiping his fingers off the screen. βIβm sending myself your location.β
And there your heart when pitter-patter again at thoughtful and kind hot as fuck Minghao. βI just told you where Iβd be.β
βThat could always change. Here,β he said, handing your phone back, beaming back at you warmly. βJust in case something happens, and you can always call me if you feel unsafe, okay?β
You gave a soft pout, cheeks growing warm at the thought of Minghaoβs concern over you. It pleased you more than it shouldβve. βThanks. What are you gonna do tonight?β
He shrugged, taking a quick glance over his shoulder. βMaybe do some light reading and tea, paint if inspiration hits me.β
You gave a small grin, thinking just how Minghao those activities sound. βSounds enlightening. Okay. Iβll be home soon.β
βBe safe.β
Even long after youβd left, you kept thinking about that interaction. How domestic it felt, how safe it made you feel, how seen you really were. It made you wonder if he was tracking you right now, looking at his phone, staring at the dot indicating where you were located. You wondered if he was thinking about you right now, because you were most certainly thinking about him.
Your mission of trying to forget Minghao by going out definitely was not working, but you took that as a sign to keep drinking. Your friends didnβt get to see you often with how much you worked, so they were just happy to see you were having a good time, not knowing you were trying to drown out the consuming thoughts of a certain man with a peculiar color scheme.Β
They wouldnβt have known the way you let yourself get felt up by a stranger near the dance floor, standing so close you could smell the knock off cologne he was practically bathing in as his breath hung in the air against your neck. When it went nowhere, he eventually left, looking for prospects elsewhere, while you stuck to your mission, seeing it work at some point at night. Until it didnβt, but you didnβt remember because eventually itβd all fade to black.
Your eyes ripped open, waking up with the biggest headache, blinded by the natural rays of light bleeding through blindsβonly your room didnβt have blinds. You specifically made sure to have blackout curtains because you couldnβt stand waking up to the sun, and that hasnβt ever changed. Grumbling irritatingly along the lines about who turned on the lights, you flipped on the other side of the bed with a half awoken daze, your blurry vision making out a lumpy figure underneath the covers.
You drew closer in confusion, trying to make sense of what you were seeing before taking in the fact the lump had a face as blinding as the sun you turned away from, startling you upon recognition. Your eyes shot open, wide awake now, and you nearly stumbled out of the mattress before his arms grabbed you, latching on you before you could fall off and safely secured you in his tucked embrace.Β
βItβs a bit early for your charming antics, isnβt it?β Minghao chucked with closed eyes.
You blinked back at him, licking your lips anxiously. βHow am I here right now?β
His eyes slowly opened, adjusting to the light. βYou mean alive or in bed with me?β
Your cheeks grew hot. βB-both.β
βI wish I had an answer for the first question, but it seems your creator had more plans for you. As for your second concern, you seemed confused and tired, and I assumed you confused this bed for yours.β
βYou shouldβve kicked me out.β
He shrugged nonchalantly, rubbing his hands over your shoulders and sending a chill down your spine. βI didnβt want to wake you up.β
You let out a soft sigh, ridden with guilt. βIβd deserve it. I mustβve been annoying to deal with.β
He knitted his brows together, the corner of his lips softly turning down. βYou really donβt like yourself.β
βNoβwell, maybe not lately. Maybe Iβm just coming to the realization Iβm not a good roommate.β
βNo one is good at anything their first time.β
βYouβre not denying it!β
βYouβre a fine roommate.β Patting you on the back, he threw off the covers and pushed himself out of bed, leaving his room to trod toward the kitchen. You followed after curiously, like a duckling that imprinted on its mother, watching as he pulled out ingredients from the fridgeβs shelves. βAnything youβre allergic to?β He asked over his shoulder.
βNothing comes to mind.β You answered hesitantly.
βGood. The recipe is fairly easy anyway, it shouldnβt kill you.β
Your eyes widened and you quickly stood by his side as he set all the items down, he followed with gathering bowls and cookware. βYouβre cooking for me?β
βMmh-hmm.β
βYou donβt have to.β
He turned his head slightly. βYou have a headache, donβt you?β
βYes butββ
βItβs just egg drop soup.β He patted your shoulder nodding his head over at the counter stool either of you would often have breakfast. βSit. Itβll be done in a few minutes.β
You sat patiently by the counter, watching him chop and throw ingredients into a small pot, which filled your shared residence with a savory aroma. As soon as he was done, he presented the dish in front of you, garnishing it with fresh chopped scallions and parsley. He picked up a serving with a soup spoon and gently blew on the top before taking a quick sample and grinning at the result. Scooping with the same spoon, he held a serving towards you with proud eyes.
βTry it,β he urged.
As you accepted the offering, you tried not to think about how you were about to share yet another household item that would enter both your mouths and let the simple flavors fan out on your tongue, the warmth of soup dispersing throughout your body. You hummed in delight, already feeling it work its magic. βItβs delicious,β you said softly.
He grinned. βFeel better.β
βThanks, Minghao.β
βNo problem at all.βΒ
As you enjoyed your thoughtful breakfast, your roommate cleaned up his mess. He wiped down whatever residue was left behind before heading to his room and coming out properly dressed in brown slacks and muted green patterned sweater when you were just about done eating. βHeading to work now.β
βYou had work?β You asked surprised, βWhy did you waste time cooking? You could have left already.β
He softly scoffed heading to the door. βI spentβwhat, five or ten minutes? Itβs fine. See you later.β
In the last 24 hours, Minghao managed to make sure you were safe by tracking your location, gave you a good night's rest by not disrupting your sleep, and made you breakfast right before work. Then thereβs you, black out drunk with almost no memory of last night (probably good you didnβt), annoying your overly nice and overly hot roommate, hogging a bed that isnβt yours, and eating a home cooked meal that probably set back his schedule. You were the worst. All the more reason for a new addition to the list.
Good roommates don't sleep in their other roommateβs bed piss drunk (again)
It seemed that this list of βdonβtsβ was getting longer, probably because youβre an awful roommate, and if there was a reward, yours would already be at the front door. You really, really had to make an effort to do something about this arrangement. Now that some time had passed and these interactions were becoming more frequent, avoiding him seemed to be out of question unless you wanted to give him the wrong impression. You would just have to become a better roommate, and that started with making up for this morning.
In the following months together, to atone for the bed incident and good deeds that followed suit, you shared the occasional breakfast if you had time (that is if you didnβt burn anything), even sometimes grabbing dinner or a late meal in the small gap before or after work. While in the late hours, when both of you shouldβve been sleeping, youβd have a cup of your favorite beverages. Heβd have his brew of tea for the night while youβd have a mug of coffee, awake under the stars and basking in the night, watching from the nook that you both grew fond of that was in the direction of the moon when itβs at its peak.
Of all people to share these moments with, you couldnβt imagine it with anyone else but Minghao. He was the peace amongst the chaos, the quiet you came home to after dealing with the noisy world that helped you heal like nothing else. You liked that about him, and now you were liking him too much, to the point you thought of him every day. What itβd be like for him to hold you in his arms, letting his warmth envelop your entire being the way his voice naturally does with a simple βitβs okay.βΒ
Youβd imagine how heβd look at you, how lovers do when they ache for one another so desperately they could feel it down to every atom. Youβd thought of the words heβd say to you, the words heβd say to someone heβs madly, irrevocably besotted with, and every letter and word and sentence would be spoken poetry. Heβd feel like love. You didnβt think it was possible for you to grow more attracted to him, but learning all these wonderful things he does and seeing up close and personal how beautiful inside and out he was, you were developing feelings and growing all these desires that you were ashamed to admit out loud.
And with that, you pulled out your list and a pen, jotting in a new item.
Good roommates donβt live in every waking moment staring at them or thinking about wanting to kiss them (no matter how hard it is)
Youβve lost count of how many times youβve already broken that rule, but the least you could do was hold yourself accountable.
However, writing the rule didn't prevent future instances. Not from fantasizing, not from wet dreams, not from imagining a life together where you rid all your inhibitions and clothes and succumb to drowning in each other. Unlike every other rule that youβve managed to avoid, this one was the outlier, flipping your world on its head and preoccupying every second of your thoughts with all things Xu Minghao. And what sucked was you were so guilt ridden, you couldn't even let yourself enjoy it.Β
This was your roommate for crying out loud. Your wholesome, nice, forgiving, and tolerant roommate that went beyond what was necessary to make you feel at home and comfortable. Only time will tell when heβll see through you and finally kick you to the curb.
βLetβs go out.β
Your head lifted up from your phone with eyes large as saucers. βWhat?β
βWe haven't really done anything together,β he suggested, cleaning up the dishes of the dinner you both had just had.
It was one of the few nights that you were both free. The coffee shop had more than enough staff, and youβve exhausted the hours put in, while the art gallery was planning a grand exhibition, so they needed all hands on deck for the mornings for a few weeks, but evenings would be free until the week of. That left you two a lot more free time than you knew what to do with.
βWe see each other all the time,β you pointed out.
βAt home. We donβt hang outside the apartment aside from that one dinner the first day we met, so letβs go out.β
You blinked, watching him grab his coat before you could argue as he waved you over, his smile luring you closer and putting you under his spell without you realizing until it was too late. βUh, where? Itβs 9PM.β
βAnywhere.β
For someone who had only arrived in town a couple months ago, Minghao knew a lot of the good spots in the city.Β If it wasnβt food, it was book stores. If it wasnβt book stores, it was tea shops. He had a clear plan of the city, and without so much looking at a GPS, he could find his way around better than any native. And considering all the people he came with that day you met the coffee shop and all the staff at the Chinese restaurant, his index didnβt stop at places. He seemed more familiar with the people in your hometown than you were. Between you two, he looked like the real local.
Walking alongside your roommate, you turned to him curiously, βHow do you know the city so well when youβve moved in somewhat recently?β
He gave a soft smile looking into the distance, as if the gust of wind that passed through you both hit him with a wave of nostalgia. βIβve been visiting for about four years. I only had the guts to become a resident recently.β
βWhyβd it take you so long?β
βStudent visa processes, paper work, all those things. Also, this city is great, and everyone I've met and have become close with is amazing, but home is just home. Itβs all Iβve ever known.β He let out a deep sigh, taking in a deep breath before stretching out his arms and let fall back to his sides, turning slightly to you. βThis country and town has become a second, though, some things even my home canβt beat.β
You mused at that, intrigued that he could find something appealing in here, then again you've been here all your life, yet Minghao showed you more you could ever imagine of it. βLike what?β
He simply smiled as their feet stopped at their final destination, a location they both aimlessly walked towards just a little off the center of the town. βIβll tell you, as soon as we try this place out.βΒ
Just off the center of town was a bar you had never heard of with a theme youβd never thought to put together on your own and definitely a place youβd never think to walk into with your roommate you were trying to keep platonic feelings for.
βHey sexy babies, welcome to the Love in Leather BDSM Bar, where all your sexy dreams can come true.β
Oh, my god.
You were petrified. Every wall was decorated with leather or latex, either on display in a box, on a vulgarly displayed mannequin, or on an employee that was dressed in next to nothing, leaving no room for imagination. You werenβt shy about the theme of BDSMβthere was always a small part of you curious about itβbut itβs not like youβve talked extensively about it with Minghao. The same person you were trying really hard not to think about sleeping with, which was especially hard in a place that served βcum shotsβ and with their special for tonight being βbuttery nipples.β
Glancing back at your roommate to get his reaction, he seemed to be just as startled with his findings as you were, but perhaps not as terrified as he should be, taking you by the wrist and weaving through the crowd with a marveled expression. You were grateful for the loud music playing the explicit versions of songs you wouldnβt otherwise hear on the radio, drowning out the sound of your heavy breathing and the loud thrum of your heart. You just had hoped he couldnβt feel your pulse under his fingertips, unable to untangle from his grasp as you felt the heat of his touch spread out through your whole body. You were trapped in a web you didnβt want to leave and that was the hardest kind to be in.
Suddenly, lights poured on the center stage of the bar. The music then slowed down, transitioning to another song, and a scantily leather clad woman entered that would erupt cheers of all clients seated in the chairs in front of her, to which she sent an air kiss and wink. Following the crowd, both you and Minghao decided to cheer along with them, your sounds of encouragement drowned out in the more enthusiastic and obscenely creative audience members of the establishment. Walking across the stage, she made a show of it, caressing her body in ways that would have a man on his knees howling at the moon (which you swore you heard once or twice in there) as money was thrown strewn stage like confetti, enough to pay for a few nice dinners uptown. After garnering the excitement, she descended down the steps of the stage, walking into her live audience. Her eyes skimmed through the endless crowds of people, landing on and picking one lucky front row memberβa young, spry man no older than twenty-fiveβand brought him on stage, ensuing roars and applause, indicating the start of the real show.
What happened next was something you did not want to get into detail, but in laymanβs terms, that audience member was having the time of his life with the use of a flog while everyone watched. You could only make the distinction of excruciating pain and pleasurable pain by the very loud affirmations coming out of his mouth and bouncing off the board he face planted on, and the words that passed through one of your ears and never wanted to come out the other. You were slack jawed from the scene, not at all expecting this scene today, and holy shit, you could not feel more suffocated knowing Minghao was witnessing all of this beside you.Β
He stared back at the scene, expression unreadable, but he seemed interested and unable to look away like it was an oncoming train wreck, looking as if he was stuck on the tracks and was making sense of what he was seeing. Suddenly, his eyes locked with yours and you watched as they softened with a glint of something behind them before you swiveled your head, feeling yourself burn from your face to your ears, clenching your free hand. This felt eerily like a date, but unlike the first dinner, this felt like a real one. An immense sexually charged one.Β
You were surrounded by sex at all angles, being tested to the most extreme degree. Tonight, youβve learned dominance wasnβt particularly your thing, but if it were Minghao, perhaps you wouldnβt have minded.Β
But this, this was overwhelming. As if sensing your turmoil, Minghao tugged your wrist, making you fix your gaze on him again and read the words that he mouthed from his lips. βTime to run.β
Your fingers interlocked and feet picked up speed as you headed toward the door, running aimlessly for miles out of the bar in fits of smiles and laughter. There was no plan and no destination, you both just wanted out, and youβd only stop running when you reached a bridge, both your bodies collapsing against the metal railing. You both gave out in heavy pants, your breaths mingling as you faced one another.Β
βThatβs crazy,β you managed to rasp. βWhy did we think we could go in there?β
He gave you a tired grin back, looking in the direction from which you came. The light layer of perspiration made his shirt cling to his skin, and you get a sliver of his chest as he aired it out for comfort. βI donβt know. Try something new, but that.β He pointed where he faced. βThatβs how I know so many places, I just walk inside.β
You ran your hand over your chest, baring the biggest grin. βGosh. I feel like dying.β
βIced coffee?β He kindly suggested.
βAnd tea?β You cared to offer.
Nodding back at each other, you both decided to walk the rest of the way back around, making a stop at a light night cafe and occupying their second floor balcony to taste the crisp air. As you sipped on your iced coffee and Minghao sipped on his warm tea, you quietly basked in the moonlit sky, as youβd done many times before. The adrenaline of tonight coursed through you still while you leaned against the railings and stared up at the stars, your elbows grazing close enough to spark that electricity that youβd feel whenever he ever got too close. This time, you were too tired to fight it, or you learned itβs about time you stopped trying to.
βI donβt drink coffee.β He abruptly confessed, penetrating the silence.
You softly scoffed, turning your head to him, taking his reminder as a jab for your βinferiorβ tastes before taking a bigger sip of your delicious fresh roast press. βI know that. You prefer tea.β
βI mean, I donβt drink coffee, but the day you βsaved me,β I did.β
You hummed. βOh. Yeah, you did. Funny. You got a coffee that day instead?β
He shook his head, smiling. βNo, ask me why I drank coffee that day.βΒ
You rolled your eyes, placing your drink on the side table before leaning your elbows over the railing. βOkay. Why did you drink coffee, Minghao?β
βI drank my friendβs mug on accident, thinking it was my tea, then tasted how scaldingly hot and wretched it wasββ
You gasped, offended as a barista, βI work really hard on those!β
He waved his hand to calm you down. βLet me finish. I mistook my normal tea for coffeeβ¦all because I got distracted, unable to stop thinking about the cute barista who wouldn't quit staring at me from behind the counter.β
β...I apologize for being a creep.β
He shook his head smiling and set his tea cup aside. βNot my point.β
You stared into the contents of your drink, shaking the ice inside as you stirred the straw, trying to find any remains of your beverage and stalling for time to follow up with a response. Lips pressed in a firm line, you glanced at him from the corner of your eye, silence met on the other end as he keenly observed you, mirroring your posture while he sipped his tea. βSoβ¦You thought I was cute,β you managed to sum up.
βThoughtβ¦thinkβ¦know.β
βWhy are you telling me all of this?β You timidly asked.
βWeβre roommates,β he reminded you, plain as day. βWe should be honest with each other, right?β
βHonest,β you repeated, lethally soft.
βYes, honest,β he confirmed just as quietly. βDonβt be afraid to tell me whatever is on your mind, just as Iβve told you what was on my mind.β
His honesty was cute, flattering. Your honesty could write up a restraining order. βIs that necessary? We only really live together.β
βItβs necessary because we live together, so yes, be honest about your feelings. Let me in on your thoughts, whatever they may be.β
Good roommates donβt forget to be honest about each otherβs feelings.
He stood in front of you dangerously close, the lingering smell of his cologne that reminded you of the ocean wafting into your nose as he drew near. His gaze beckoned you close without so much a word passing through his lips, and you felt his presence close in on the distance as he leaned against the railing. You softly batted your eyes, adjusting to your sense being overtaken by all things Minghao, mind just filled to the brim with Minghao, as if you couldnβt get enough of him.
βYouβre really committed to being a good roommate. I respect that,β you stated, harshly gulping. βHonesty. Where can I start?β
βWell, what are you thinking about right now?β He asked, face mere inches away from you, lips so plush you let out a wistful sigh.
βIβm thinking thatβ¦itβs really hard to think with your face so close in front of me.β
Despite that, he didnβt move, and instead he pushed a lock of your hair behind your ear, brushing against your helix to feel your flustered warmth bloom between his fingers. βFair enough. What else?β
You wrapped your hand around the railing, stabling yourself on the floor in hopes of not falling over on your two feet, your breath being stolen in real time by your roommate who was looking more and more inviting by the second.
βAnd if I knew any better, Iβd think you're about to kiss me.β
βLetβs wager that then,β he said as he reeled even closer, his fingertips once in your ears now guiding your chin, letting the surface of your lips feel the ghost of his as your breaths mingled against one another. βYou can predict one of two things. One, I kiss you. Or two, I pull away. You get a prize if your answer is correct.β
βHow is that a fair wager? You can easily change your response depending on how I answer,β you pointed out, ultimately playing along.
βI wonβt,β he reassured in a coaxingly smooth tone. βIβve made my choice.β
You raised a brow, attempting to look only subtly intrigued when in reality youβve let him enchant you. βWhatβs my prize?β
βLoser grants whatever the winner wishes.β
βThatβs irresponsible.β
βKnowing you, your request would be far from unreasonable.β
βIβm talking about you.β You narrowed your eyes, swallowing at seeing him come at you so close. βBut, okay. Iβll play.β
The corner of his lips lifted mischievously, tilting his head to the side as his eyes narrowed back at you. βSo, whatβs your answer?βΒ
Your eyes flickered up to him, rounded up in intrigue as you tried to follow his gaze. βYouβllβ¦pull away. Public displays of affection are cute, but maybe not your cup of tea, at least not grand ones like kissing, unless maybe itβs one the cheek or on the forehead.β
He smiled and gently tilted his head, eyes piercing into yours and taking a sharp breath before pulling away, crossing his arms with a soft pout on his lips. βYouβre good.β
You felt the sting of rejection despite your victory, as if youβd hoped youβd be wrong. That heβd take you right there against the railing and give you a fervid kiss that broke you down to your knees and you could even taste in your dreams, but a win was a win. A predicted loss was better than a false victory.
βI guess I won.β
He sighed defeatedly, crossing his arms. βYou did. So tell me, what desire would you like for me to fulfill for you?β
You shuddered at his choice of words, clamping your legs together. βWell, what would you have wanted me to do if I got the answer wrong?β
βIs that your wish? For me to answer the question?β
You softly scoffed. βDonβt be so cheap.β
He rolled his eyes before taking a sip of his tea, βDoesnβt matter, you didnβt get it wrong. You get the wish. So go on, tell me your wish.β
ββ¦Fine. Grant me your wish as if you had won.β
βYou want me to grant my own wish? That defeats the entire purpose,β he chortled with knitted brows.
βItβs my wish, so come on. Whatβs your wish?β
βYou donβt have to do this.β
βAnd we didn't have to place bets, but it doesn't seem like thereβs any rules against it, so go ahead. Tell me.β
Minghao sucked his teeth before complying. βFine.βΒ
He moved toward you, hands settling over your hips and settling you on the floor beneath your feet as he gravitated toward, steadying his gaze on you. His face, inches away from you, and your breath hitched in your throat as he drew his lips near your ear. You heard the subtle squelch of his tongue as they licked his teeth, moments before the wish he dared you to grant poured out from his lush lips. βMy wish is for you toβ¦make me tea every morning, afternoon, evening, and every time I ask you to. Like my little tea gremlin.β
βNow thatβs just evil, Xu Minghao,β You protested, lightly shoving him off.
He laughed. βNo, itβs not! Think of it like pour over coffee.β
βDonβt try romanticizing it like itβs anything like my beautiful beans. Tea is tea. Coffee is coffee.β
βIt was your wish to grant my wish.β
βCan I take it back?β You whined.
βItβd be dishonorable.β
You groaned. βFine.β
He chuckled, βLetβs go home, hmm?β
Heading back home, you were embraced by a warm comfortable silence. There was a kind of silence that sanctioned your amicable living arrangement with Minghao to turn into something warmer, feverish even, something that you canβt even help but notice and your hands would occasionally graze one another on the way back, taking turn exchanging timid glances at you walked your path home.
βThat was fun,β You admitted, taking off your shoes at the front door.
βYeah, I think so. We should do it more often.β
You smiled at each otherβs reflections as you stood in front of the bathroom mirror, seeing you take the same tube of toothpaste and started brushing your teeth. You smiled as he purposely bumped into you, raising his eyebrow as you stared pointedly at him in the mirror, not expecting you to retaliate with a light shove. Ensuing a nudging war, you attacked each otherβs shoulders, getting caught in fits of giggles before you forced yourselves to split up, knowing nothing would get done if you both let it go on.
βDo you work tomorrow?β You asked through the gaping door of your room as he cleared a glass a water before bedtime, freshly out of a shower and the smell of his clean, light fragrance was beguiling even from a distance.
βYeah. Do you?β
βYeah.β
βMmh.β He stalked over in your direction, a feign innocent smile on his lips. βThat's too bad. We only really have nights like these together, it seems at least only for a little while.β
βIt is,β You said, lathering up the last bit of lotion up your legs, feeling his eyes on you as they traveled the path of your hands.
The silence engulfed you, as if both of you were waiting for the other to make a sudden move, yet both of you remained still. Like a predator with its prey, unsure who was who, you both stood with uncertainty and palpable tension hanging in the air, waiting for the other to strike when the moment was right. Even the usually confident Minghao stood back as he observed you from a distance, eyes flickering over at you as you strided slowly towards him guarded with crossed arms.
βI guess, Iβll go to sleep now,β You finally said.
His gaze softened, nodding. βOkay,β he smiled, βgood night.β
βGood night, Minghao. Sleep well.β
If only you had taken your own words to heart.Β
That night, you couldnβt help but stare back at the ceiling, fiddling with the covers as the nightβs events replayed in your head like a home movie, your thoughts traveling at a million miles a minute, too fast for you to stop and collect themβlet alone process themβand stole your precious slumber. So, as you lay in bed awake at night, squeezing your eyes shut and waiting for the night to take you, waiting for the fatigue and sleep to come, it never arrived. Instead, your eyes ripped open, heart pounding in your chest as you sat up from the mattress and tore the covers off your body. Your legs pushed you off the bed and lifted yourself off, carrying yourself out the room and out the hallway with determined steps until faltering at the threshold of another front door before you softly knocked.Β
You turned the knob, the door creaked open and you peeked your head through to see your roommate on the other end in bed, torso visibly bare as he slowly sat up at his late night intrusion. βHey,β He mumbled, rubbing his eyes. βYouβre up.β
βI think itβs the coffee,β you excused, clutching the edge of the door, βI canβt sleep.β
Wordlessly, he nodded, stretching an arm to beckon you towards him, and you slowly inched closer to him until you were completely under the covers. Occupying the space beside him, you nestled into the contours of his body as his arm cushioned the side of your head before facing one another, silence enveloping you. The only sound that bit into the silence was muted traffic, infinitely alive outside the walls of your confines. While it looked peaceful, and you felt as though you could melt into his arms, neither of you looked as if you were trying to sleep.
Rather, you stared at one another, making sleep even harder to attain as you traced every feature and took them in as if they were brushstrokes on a painting. Minghao may have worked with art every day, but he was a work of art in his own right, and you couldnβt help favor him above all others. You didnβt need a Van Gogh or Picasso, you had an original, a one of a kind Minghao.
And thatβs when you saw his eyes begin to drift, lowering to the bottom half of your face, lips parting in intrigue as his breath fanned lightly against your cheeks. Your face flush in response, pushing your bottom lip between your teeth before they were caught, finding yourself doing the same with him and watching his mouth move in anticipation. You felt your pulse in your throat as much as you felt it between your legs, feeling arousal pooling and soaking your shorts.
βDo you want to wager another bet?β Minghao softly offered.
βWhat kind?β You breathed.
βThe same bet, same prize. Do you think Iβll kiss you, or will I pull away?β
You mused at him, fingers extending toward him reluctantly, aiming for a lock of his hair laying stray on his forehead before smoothing it over his head, softly stroking him, feeling him lean into your touch. βHmm, this time youβllβ¦kiss me,β you whispered with absolute certainty. βThe tension is practically eating you alive.β
A grin stretched wide across his cheeks as a hand softly clasped over your face, thumb swiping across your cheek. βRight again.β
He closed the gap, slotting his lips between yours and languidly moving against you, letting you chase after his pace. You sighed against him, feeling his hand on your hip as he pulled your torso against his, the other rested against the nape of your neck as he reveled in your heat. Hands flying in his hair, you softly moaned as he kneaded your skin, feeling him trace the inside of your mouth with his tongue before he roughly pulled your weight from the mattress to topple you over him, letting your legs card between his.
βMinghao,β you quietly sounded against his lips, crushing your hips against his groin and hearing his sweet moan in response.
His muscles tensed as you pressed against him, while his legs clung to your thighs. His hands ran over the shape of your figure, unearthing an ungodly moan from your lips as he slipped beneath your shorts, etching over the curve of your ass and claiming your raw flesh in his hands, pushing you against him assertively.
You whimpered, grinding against him. βI know my wish.β
βAnything,β He tenderly mumbled.
βCall off work tomorrow.β
He smiled against your lips, bringing one of his knees to pin your bodies closer together. βMeans you should too.β
βOh, definitely,β You confirmed before reconnecting your mouths in a frenzied liplock.
Feeling the grind of your hips as his pelvis crushed against yours, his grunts slipped through every caress as his hand moved up your back. Soon, you started feeling something you had yet to see from Minghao in all your time living with him, the part of him you managed to evade but have envisioned a multitude of times, growing in his sweatpants and rubbing against your thigh the closer your bodies were.
βI have never wanted someone so bad,β He whispered in a soft ache.Β
His hands crept underneath your shirt, brushing against your skin, pressing against the small of your back. Pressing his torso towards you, his erection adhered to your thigh, the tension coiling in your stomach burned like wildfire, at an unstoppable rage. βMinghao,β you mewled, impatience singeing on your tongue.
βSomehow, I can still taste coffee on your breath, but I don't really mind it. It tastes really good on you,β He admitted before kissing you deeper, his moans buzzing against your mouth, hungry and alive as his hands dug into your flesh with utter greed.
βYou taste really good too.β Your hand body scoured south, cupping his size under your palm and tasting his gasp as you sucked him between your lips. βI wonder what else tastes good.β
βYou are something else,β he mumbled, through quiet chuckles. βJust like you to act on impulse.β
You let out a light scoff. βYou are soββ
βDonβt start things you canβt finish,β he softly warned with a smirk.
βIβm not the one you have to worry about finishing.β
You moved down, the covers draped over your head as you kept your eyes on him and resting on the hem of his sweats. Minghaoβs breath hitched in his throat, gulping while he felt your nails lightly claw against his bare torso, tugging the waistband off the tent he forged, revealing the lack of underwear and restraint he had left, now sprung against your face.
βShit,β you said grinning, claiming him by the shaft, thumbing over the precum glistening at the tip. βEven your cock looks pretty.β
A soft pink decorated his cheeks and a hand meekly shielded part of his face. βYou staring is how I got myself hurt in the first place.β
βThen Iβll be careful not to hurt you this timeβthat is, unless you want me to.β
You spat on his cock, a translucent ribbon stretching from your tongue to his length. Your saliva lubing your knuckles, you squeezed his girth in your grip as you stroked and felt him pulse in your hands, growing bigger the tighter you clenched. Minghaoβs arms propped himself up and behind him as his chest heaved, blood pumping with every drag of your fingers, shallow breaths slipping out of him as he fisted the sheets beneath him.
You kissed the curve of the head, lips pursed to wrap lightly around him, suckling down his shaft, and feeling him twitch against your mouth when you chuckled. He softly whined, his hand extended toward you to tenderly caress the side of your head and tacitly pleading with you as you teased him. Showing him mercy, you took him with an eager mouth, closing your lips around his cock as you steadied your gaze on him. Moans vibrating around his girth, your tongue tucked on the underside of his shaft, hands wrapped tightly around his base.
βMmmh like that.β He swallowed, exhaling through his teeth the deeper you took him. His abdomen flexing overtly as you moaned around him, vibrated against his skin, your pink muscle tracing over his veins as you worked your jaw to hug a tighter grip. βGod, youβre perfect. Donβt stop, pleaseβ¦β he panted.
He palmed at your hair headily, his motor skills not properly functioning as he sucked in his breath, feeling his presence explore deeper. He leveraged his hips to regain some ounce of control, but the sounds of moisture and squelching burned his ears, and the heart in his chest was running like a marathon. His eyes, fluttering in and out of focus, trained his gaze on you while his stomach tensed, grasping the vision of you getting wide-eyed and bold as you gingerly ate him alive. Burning the image into his retinas, it made him want to explode inside you.
Threading through your hair, he pulled them up and off your shoulders, showing off your pretty features, doing everything in his power not to give his climax an early appearance. βIβve never seen such a pretty mouth take my cock so well. Then again, Iβve never had a pretty roommate like you, or anyone like you.β
Flustered from the flattery, you sucked him like your life depended on it as you grew hot, making Minghaoβs task to regain control strenuous to achieve. You hollowed out your cheeks, leaving no room to breathe, and felt him in your throat as your vision rolled to behind your skull to the point your language deduced to the sounds of gagging. You gripped his hips, nails plunged into his flesh as your drool dribbled down his groin, slobbering over his cock in an erratic, hungry mess.
βYes, like that. My god,β He praised through ragged breaths, hips jerking gently up into you. He lightly threw his head back, the urge to ram himself down your throat getting exceedingly more tempting, but he suppressed it as he dug his nails into his own palms. βIβm so close to cumming, can Iβin your mouth or should Iβ¦?β
You hummed a confirmation before you swallowed him whole until you met the base, meeting his groin as he vanished inside you, breathing oxygen not even an afterthought. Images in front of you dulled in color, pictures shapeless and unclear, and you pushed past your boundaries to let him find home in your mouth, deeply intent with him finishing inside you one way or the other.
βFβ¦fβ¦fuck...β
Pleasure rippling through him, Minghao pushed himself up from his position, thrusting weakly as he cradled your head, pouring his thick, ivory load into your mouth, which was insistent on receiving every drop. He filled your cheeks, allowing warmth to coat the inside of your mouth as he tenderly stroked your hair in gratitude. Cupping your cheeks as he let his hips falter, he gently pulled himself out of your mouth, amused at how carefully you were trying to not let any of his cum seep past your lips as you sat between his legs.
His fingers danced under your chin. βAre you gonna swallow?β Minghao tiredly chuckled.
With smiling eyes, you tilted your head, as if asking if you should.
He pushed your hair behind you, softly pressing his lips against your tightly shut lips. βDonβt if you donβt want to.β
An idea occurred to you then, and in an instant you pushed yourself up to board him as your knees took either side of him, looming over him. His hands naturally found your waist as you lifted his chin, eyes staring at you curiously as his hands ran up body and gently clawed down, awaiting your next move. You then thumbed over his bottom lip before dipping between the slit of his mouth and saw it naturally part, taking the digit and settling it between his teeth.
Now confidently, you lowered your head, swirling the contents in your mouth before pushing your thumb deeper, prying the entrance wider, and finding no protest as he sanctioned it. He dug the pads of his digits into your flesh in anticipation. His eyes fluttering, he watched as your mouth withdrew the generous gift he gave to you before you gave it right back to him as it gracefully streamed down on his pulsing, eager tongue. And nothing satisfied you more than hearing him sigh wistfully as it landed.
It sent you shivers how beautiful he looked despite how vulgar the act was. Only Xu Minghao could make tasting his own cum look so ethereal, and it only made you wonder what other things a face this beautiful was willing to do. You swiped whatever fell from the corner of his lips with your thumb, sucking the residue like leftovers before you connected your mouths, sharing and tasting his lewd tang in violent swirls, and pulling away to watch it stretch between your tongues.
βI guess toothbrushes arenβt the only things you like to share,β Minghao teased before pushing you on your back, grinding his resurrecting arousal against your clothed heat and lathering the thick, viscous substance flat between your tongues in your mouths as it dribbled down your chins until there was nothing but slobber. It was a mess, and the most unmannerly youβve ever seen him, and youβve never been more turned on.
βMy turn.β
With a rough hand, he tugged you by your legs towards him, hearing you let out a yelp, and shoved down your shorts to expose your glistening, mouth-watering, arousal soaked entrance. Be still his heart. He felt himself throb seeing you ruin his bed, but hell if he wasn't going to be sucking those juices out of the sheets until heβd tasted every drop.
He kicked off his sweats, leaving him entirely vulnerable while you witnessed his cock slowly twitch back to life before he laid on his stomach between your arched legs. βIf we want to talk about pretty things, your pussy is high up on that list.β
Not waiting for a response, he licked a thick stripe up your inner thigh, flickering over your folds before sucking them in his mouth, using the tip of his tongue to tease your entrance. He felt the flutter of your core before spitting, lathering at the juices, coating at entrance but not peeking to see what was inside. βYouβre already so wet, fuck.βΒ
βHaoβ¦β You whined.
βMmmh, I love how you sound,β he chuckled, running long strokes up your slit, wedged through you with every swipe, looking arm around your leg to hold you in place as his thumb brushed over your clit. βAre your moans always this delicious? Or are they reserved for when youβre thinking about me?βΒ
Shaking your head, you were too turned on to answer verbally, while his mouth closed around your clit and sucked, utilizing his fingers to assume their previous position. You clenched your stomach, fisting into the sheets as you spread your legs, feeling them already clam up from the tension as his tongue flicked against your sensitive bud in unison with his fingers twisted up into, and you couldnβt help but writhe underneath him.
βYes, spread those pretty legs for me,β he encouraged with a haughty smile before burying his face, his moans vibrating up your walls as his tongue massaged your walls and tasted your cock pulsing nectar, sending chills up your spine.
You mewled, and feeling reserved, you held your hands up to your face to shield the tears collecting at your eyes threatening to fall, but Minghao grabbed you by the wrists, roughly pinning them to the bed.
His eyes narrowed back at you before softening almost menacingly, βDonβt cover your pretty face, watch me.β
βButββ
βI want you to watch me fuck your pretty pussy with my mouth. Donβt make me say it twice.β He warned before he got you a quiet nod, earning you a kiss against your inner thigh.
His hand flattened against your inner thighs again, pressing them further away from another and delving his tongue deeper as he rubbed your clit, working your insides until he tasted every inch of you possible. He buried his face, but his eyes were clear, staring at you as he worked his jaw, engorging with his mouth that sent you above and beyond and his eyes that saw you at the result of your undoing. You had no choice but to cling on, freeing yourself from his grasp to have your fingers fly in his hair, navigating him as you took him for a joy ride, his tongue shifting gears as it picked up pace.
βS-shit!β You rolled your hips, threading your fingers through his locks and clamping his head between your thighs as you pushed him deeper.
βYes, ride my faceβfuck, use me, please,β he pleaded in a cracked voice, pouring his heart into his feast until he was practically suffocating, worth it to worship you and bring you to the highest peak of your pleasure.
Your legs trembled as his moans infiltrated your heat, the intense flicks of his tongue titillating you to the brink of ecstasy until he used it to fuck you in time with his fingers thrusting inside, clutching you as you held him in place and grinding against him. βMy god, Hao!β
Hips shaking, you bucked into his mouth, and even after your release, he made no effort to stop, lifting you to his mouth as he got on his knees, eating you like a meal heβd never have again until he worked his tongue raw, tasting you and only you as your cum coated his mouth. You squirmed, the suction of his lips on your sensitive core in tandem with his tongue viciously swirling inside you overwhelming you beyond words, unable to kick him off as he held both your knees above his head.
βYouβre gonna kill me, Hao,β you cried desperately. βJust put it in me.β
He chuckled before setting you down, meeting your lips halfway as he stroked his fully erect cock, massaging the eveningβs concoction against your tastebuds, mingling the contrasting flavors as they battled in your mouth while the knowledge of it all pebbled your skin. Meanwhile, he ran his hands over you beneath your shirt, found your nipples, rolling them against his thumbs as his cock rubbed between your folds, ebbing your moans as they buzzed against his lips. βWhat if I want to play with you first?β He taunted.
You whined, brushing your lips repeatedly over his. βI want you inside me.β
βYouβre cute even when youβre needy,β he gushed.
You clasped your hands over his soft, warm cheeks. βMinghao, pleaseβ¦β
He playfully rolled his eyes, kissing into your palm then down your wrist before his teeth playfully started nibbling at your skin. βFine, because you asked so nicely. Just to let you know, though, I donβt have a condom on me right now, but Iβm clean.β
βThen, we donβt need one.β
He grinned, stroking the back of your head. βI had a feeling youβd say that.β
Rubbing his tip down your slit, he savored your whimpers as he drew circles against your clit before sliding his length through your folds and stretching your walls, letting you slowly adjust to his presence. Your jaw slightly dropped as you took a sharp inhale, fingers digging into his shoulders and clinging on to him before you felt him sink deeper inside you, pacing his thrusts in a steady rhythm. Your eyes flit to meet his, feeling the back and forth of his hips as they snapped, while you reveled in each collision.
βYes pleaseβ¦β
Before losing himself in his pleasure, he was determined to remember how you looked getting lost in yours, taking in your features as they distorted under his care. He first found your eyesβlost in a galaxy with an infinite amount of stars out of the way. Then, his eyes started to follow the slope of your cheeks, flushed to the touch against the back of his hand, saliva leaking out of your swollen lips. And your body with the shirt adhered to you by the sweat on your skin, clinging to your form and proving to him time and time again that you were not only the object of his desires, you were something straight out of his dreams.
βYou look, taste, and feel good? Where have you been all my life? Really?β He landed a harsh thrust, pressing down on your nipples and smiling manically at how you whimpered in response, clutching you as you shuddered against him. βYou like that?β
You nodded, clawing your hand up his back.
βMmh, me too,β he drew his lips to your ear. βAnd I like you. A lot. I wouldnβt let someone go on and use my toothbrush for months if I didnβt.β He slowed down his thrusts, cupping your face to meet your eyes. βYou like me too, right?β
Feeling your ears burn, you frantically nodded again, mewling after you felt him nip at them, teeth scraping under your earlobe before an open mouth pressed against the side of your neck. The warmth of his breath sweltering against you as you struggled to carry on with the conversation Minghao was determined to have.
βYeah, you want me to take you on a real date?β He said into the nape of your neck, moaning into your skin as he dragged his hips, rutting into you like an animal.Β He barely made out your soft βyesβs in your sharp gasps. He gritted his teeth, taking you by the hips, pushing himself flushed against you. βFuck, youβre so cute,β he groaned.
His hips took flight while he separated your mouth in a loud moan, feeling you becoming malleable under his touch and growing weaker as you recoiled against him. He lifted your shirt above your chest and neared your stiff peaks, rolling your bud against the base of his tongue as he pinched the other, moving out of pure instinct. You threw your head back, going mad with sexual gratification. Your body spasmed out of your control, yet you craved more.
βHarder,β You gasped.
He scoffed under his breath in disbelief. βYou want even more?β
βYesβ¦I want you to cum inside me. I want to feel everything thatβs yours, Minghao.β
Knees buckling at your titillating request, he gripped your ass in both palms, clutching you against him as he rammed himself up inside you, and youβre forced to hold on. βIβll do you one better,β he offered, βwhy donβt I just make you mine?β
βIβ¦Oh, godβ¦β Your brain was becoming mush, only processing the sound, taste, smell, sensation of Minghaoβs cock as he plunged himself inside you. It fogged up your thoughts, clouded your judgement, and only formed incoherent gibberish that took place of real vocabulary as they passed through your swollen lips.
βBe mine, hmm?β He asked, pleading. βThat way I can be yours.β
Captivated by his words, you nodded, feeling him suck the life out of you as your body felt close to giving out, the hilt of his cock bottoming out inside you. You anchored your legs around him, following his pace before you felt something within reach, just seconds away from ripping a scream out of your throat that would surely ensue a noise complaint from one of your neighbors.
βHao, Iβm going to cum, Iβm really close,β you meekly warned.
His hand settled against your thigh, nodding. βI can feel it. Youβre shaking so hard. Let me have it, Iβll catch you. Every last bit of you.β
Ecstasy was just a word, but Minghao was everything, and you could breathe in that everything.Β
Your bodies crushed against each other, lost in heat as you became one. Breaths blended, bodies embraced, only faltering after you long finished the initial orgasms, coming back for more. You embracedΒ the sheer carnivorous lust that quelled this several month long push and pull, adhering you by the sweat misted on each other's skin before your mouths tenderly met repeatedly.
Sleep felt futile, while the night felt everlasting. Minghaoβs company was more than you could ever ask for, and by the time you did sleep, you were too tired to move. You collapsed against each other, bodies drowning in each otherβs releases, sheets and pillows stained by the arousal from the eveningβs lack of inhibitions. Minghao shouldβve been just as tired, but instead he tended to your tired body, leaving kisses in its wake as he cleaned you off and slept alongside you in your clean bed, letting him worry about laundry in the morning.
With your eyes closed, mind in another world, Minghao was brushing the hair away from your face, softly smiling as you gently stirred and nestled closer to him. In response, he pressed a sweet kiss to your temple, warmth blooming in his chest as a grin developed on your face.
βIβll take you on a proper date. I promise,β he said while you slept. βAnd If I donβt, pull the bad roommate card on me. You can punish me however you like.β
Placements that remind me of the 'Archetypes' in Robert Greene's Art of Seduction
π[At the end of the post, I've mentioned the Palestinians who've reached out to me. Please scroll down and consider helping them in this time of need.]π
The gist of the book is that the author claims there are 9 types of people who attract our fancy and if you look back upon your past relationships in which you had the hardest time getting over people, you'll find at least one of these archetypes had you in a chokehold. I've noticed certain placements embody these archetypes quite well. So let's get into it!
π§ββοΈThe Siren
Intense, all-consuming, irresistible. This is the kind of person who pulls you in just by existing. Their energy is sensual, they play with desire, and there's no hiding the fire behind their gaze.
Venus in Scorpio or Mars in Scorpio: These folks ooze mystery and magnetism. Venus or Mars here practically commands intense eye contact, a stare that feels like it's looking straight into your soul (and maybe reading all your secrets π).
Pluto in the 1st House: They have that come hither aura without even trying. Their presence is just heavy, dark, and intriguing.
Lilith aspects to Venus or Mars: Lilith knows how to channel that raw, primal energy that people canβt look away from.
πΆοΈThe Rake
A flirt and unapologetically so. The Rake is playful, passionate, and knows how to make someone feel like they're the only person in the room. They thrive on thrilling their βprey.β
Mars in Aries: Direct, passionate, no games. Mars in Aries dives right in and doesnβt hold back, which makes people feel desired AF.
Venus in Gemini: Flirty, playful, always has the right words at the right time. Theyβve got charm in every text, every look, every smirk.
Eros in the 3rd House: Eros here gets off on mental stimulation, knowing that once they can engage your mind, they can get you anywhere else too.π
πThe Ideal Lover
Romantic, tender, understanding. They know just what you want and give it to you. Thereβs an aura of "I was made for you" about them that feels very movie-like.
Venus in Libra: Literally the ultimate lover. Theyβre charming, attentive, and all about creating harmony in love.
Neptune in the 7th House: They radiate dreamy, fairy-tale love vibes. It's a magnetic quality, and people project all kinds of fantasies onto them.
Psyche in the 1st House or conjunct Venus: Psyche brings an intuitive understanding of what people need emotionally, making them feel deeply seen.
πThe Dandy
Unpredictable, a little bit of both masculine and feminine energy, and oh-so-daring. The Dandy doesnβt fit into any one box and totally thrives on that.
Uranus in the 1st House: Think uniqueness and uncontainable vibes. They attract attention without even trying and arenβt afraid to stand out.
Venus in Aquarius: Experimental in love, unconventional, and so full of quirks. They might dress edgy, embrace their quirks, and draw people in through pure originality.
Mars in Libra: Balances both masculine and feminine energy perfectly. Their way of pursuing people is soft yet firm, and theyβre never boring.
π±The Natural
Effortlessly cute, innocent, and unassuming. They have this way of making everyone around them feel at ease and seen. Theyβre playful without trying too hard, which gives a refreshing sense of authenticity.
Moon in Cancer or Venus in Cancer: They radiate warmth and gentleness. People feel safe around them and are easily drawn to their nurturing vibe.
Venus in the 5th House: This Venus placement is playful and creative, attracting people through sheer joyfulness and a love for fun.
Ceres in the 1st or 7th House: Ceres has that caring, supportive energy that makes people feel genuinely seen and loved.
πΈοΈThe Coquette
They play hard to get, with a bit of push-pull energy. They leave people wanting more and keep others on their toes. Coquettes are experts in creating mystery.
Venus in Virgo: They might come off reserved at first, but their attention to detail and small gestures make people feel special.
Moon in Scorpio: They keep their emotions under wraps, drawing others in by only showing glimpses of their deeper self.
Juno in the 12th House: Theyβre commitment-focused but mysterious about it, leaving people to wonder if theyβll ever fully understand them.
πThe Charmer
Smooth, sociable, a lover of people. Charmers win over others with their adaptability and attentiveness, making everyone feel like theyβre the most fascinating person in the room.
Sun in Libra: Naturally sociable and harmonious, they know just how to appeal to peopleβs desires and make everyone feel at ease.
Mercury in the 7th House: Skilled at reading people and adapting to them. They know how to say the right thing at the right time.
Aphrodite in the 1st or 10th House: Aphrodite brings allure and grace to their public presence. When they walk into a room, people notice; they just want to look, like theyβre drawn to a work of art.
πThe Charismatic and The Star
Radiates confidence and star quality. They draw people in with the sheer force of their presence and charisma. This type doesn't even need to tryβthey just shine.
Sun in Leo: Confident, warm, and charismatic. Leo Suns love to be adored and know just how to work a crowd.
Jupiter in the 1st House: Jupiter expands their presence, making them seem larger-than-life and totally magnetic.
Pallas in the 5th House: With Pallas here, theyβre strategic about how they present themselves, drawing people in with skillful, playful interactions.
β° That's it folks! I hope you all can find your placements somewhere in there and feel empowered and confident in your charisma.
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